A single pixie charged at thousands of devils. A barrage of tridents and dicks swung his way, yet Seth pushed through. Fortunately, Momo’s eyes were closed or he would have likely been traumatized for life.

With one swing of his arms, the warrior sent a dozen rusty blades through the enemy’s guts. Two more swings and the devils around him looked like flying porcupines. They fell to their dooms, but sadly, a hundred more stepped in to replace them.

“Buahaha, you're finished,” said their leader. “Your days of oppressing the innocent are over!”

Unfortunately, Seth’s blades were either too broken for use or stuck in the fallen devils’ chests. He was left unarmed, surrounded, and with a terrified squirrel for an ally.

“God damn it,” he sighed.

“Give up?” said Eligos while getting in his face. His creepy grin showed a row of canines while his lizard-like tongue moved across his lips.

“First off, personal space.”

“Huh?”

A gravity infused punch sent the Devil Duke flying.

“You bastard, I was going to give you a way out.” Eligos wiped the blood off his lips and prepared his trident.

“Second, even I know you guys aren’t innocent," said the pixie in a serious tone. "The sight of your mugs alone could kill a baby.”

“Our faces are beautiful!” Several offended voices resounded through the crowd. “It’s not our fault babies are sensitive!” one of them slipped. “What he meant to say is…”

“I don’t care!” Seth snapped. For once, he looked genuinely angry, like when someone sent him poop for Christmas or when he realized light sabers don't exist.

“This is the most uncomfortable fight I have ever been in!” he shuddered while looking at his enemies. “Moses, open your eyes.”

“Do I have to?” his steed had kept them closed ever since the battle began.

“Yes!” Seth insisted. “I refuse to be the only one starring at dicks! You assholes claim to be innocent, but this is sexual harassment!”

Ever since the fight began, the pixie was flying through a sea of shlongs. Whether he dodged them, cut them, or was forced to block them, it was an experience worse than many of his deaths.

You could be reading stolen content. Head to Royal Road for the genuine story.

“Hey, we Devils do not believe in clothes,” Eligos stepped forward to defend his kind. “Your behavior is highly racist.”

“Sir, how about we go back and join Alastar on the walls,” Momo proposed.

“Run away from a fight!?” To Seth, such a thing was unthinkable. He would rather die, although… ‘Getting slapped to death by giant red dicks is not a memory I want to have.’ Feeling stuck between a trident and a hard place, Seth turned his eyes towards the wall.

Only the devil elites had stopped to face the pixie, while their main forces were attacking the city. Fortunately, a bubble shaped barrier kept the creatures out, at least for now. Small cracks were already starting to show, and soon enough, the massacre would begin.

“Sir. mage,” a busty soldier greeted Alastar. “Are you here to help us?”

‘Do I have a choice?’ “Of course,” is what he said. “Worry not flesh bag, with me here, the devils don’t stand a chance.”

While bodies landed on the barrier, poking it with their sticks, Alastar pulled out his chrystal.

‘My precious…’

The mage shook his head. As long as he played his cards right, there would be plenty more where this came from. With determined eyes, Alastar the wise placed his hand on the barrier.

‘Note to self: Buy an umbrella.’

A red streak ran through the bubble while the chrystal in his hand turned gray. The cracks made by the devils weren’t fixed. In fact, nothing seemed to have changed at all.

“Sir. mage?” the soldier asked in a worried tone. More and more devils were piling on top of them almost blotting out the sun.

“20,…”

“How about you throw a fireball?” advised the woman. The barrier was semi-permeable. It allowed the army to shoot from inside while keeping the enemy at bay.

“12,…”

“They’re going to break through any minute now.” The last rays of sunshine had been blocked by the enemies.

“7,…”

Everyone was staring at a bunch of dicks.

“4…”

One of the cracks suddenly got bigger. Any moment now, the barrier would pop.

“…1.”

Alastar’s smile was as peaceful as a summer’s day. The barrier did not pop, but the devils did. Every single creature that was in contact with the barrier’s outer surface burst into pieces like balloons full of blood and entrails.

The mage looked almost touched by his achievement. The city was covered in a bloody cocoon.

Nonetheless, he hurriedly walked towards the splatter and filled several vials before the pieces could mix up.

‘If only they had souls,’ he sighed before gazing at the pixie through red colored lenses.

“How!?” shrieked the Demon Duke while biting off his nails. Half of his army looked like spilled soup.

“This is what you get for ‘coming’ on top of a city,” Seth chided. As much as he tried, he couldn't stop thinking about the issue 'at hand.'

“You bastard!”

Eligos pointed his trident and charged into battle. The pixie gathered his mana and met him half way. The Devil’s weapon was long and hard. Seth’s moist wind attempted to stop it. When the tip of their strikes touched…

“WAIT!” Suddenly, Seth raised his palm. “I can’t f**king do this!”

“What in Beelzebub’s name are you talking about?” The devil was confused but kept his distance.

“I wanted to fight you fair and square,” the pixie mumbled. “But, no… NO…. This is too much. No, no, no...”

“Are you going to duel or what?”

“Sorry dude,” said Seth while pulling out a mana chrystal. “Indecent exposure is where I draw the line.”