15 - Superman? More Like Stupidman

Outskirts of Pelensgrad, Afternoon After the Festival

Petra felt the Clark Kent glasses on her face. She turned around, furious. "Dammit, Jack! Is that the best you could do?"

"I don't know," Jack said, as Annelise helped him out of the water. The pond had lost a considerable amount of volume and was now more of a mud puddle. Even the waterfall was at a trickle. Sissy used her cloak to wrap his body. "I was just thinking about how no one seems to know that Kent is Superman."

"Cast it again!" Petra said and threw her glasses to the ground.

"I can't!" Jack said.

"Do it!"

"I can't!"

"Don't make me cut your—"

"He can't," Annelise said, as she finished putting on her clothes. "The magic is too powerful. We would need to find a new source of water."

"We'll follow the stream!" Petra said.

"We could be walking for miles. The Traldalorian armies will catch us."

Petra pulled Annelise down by the scruff of the tunic.

"Dudes," Aiden said. "Why don't we find a cave and chill out for a day? We are all tired."

Petra let Annelise go and said, "What good will staying in the town do for us, anyway?"

"I have an ally," Annelise replied. "They will provide us a place to stay and safe passage from the town, but we must get by the gate guard, and there is a chance, though small, that the magic worked. The magic here works with intent."

"What?" Tim said. "You're saying because Jack intended for the glasses to be our disguise, they might actually work as one?"

"Yes, the water is only how he draws his power. It is up to Jack to shape it with his will."

"I'm with Aiden," Sissy said. "Let's just find a cave and hideout."

"But babe," Jack said. "You don't trust my willpower?"

"You can't drive by a Taco Bell without stopping for their nacho fries."

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"But they're nacho fries! They're limited edition!"

"I think I'm with Sissy on this one," Tim said.

"The Traldalorians will have Rangers. They are elite hunters and trackers. They will find us even if we hide away. Unless we want to keep walking without rest, we will need the trail to go cold. The only way to do that is in that town."

"So, we either die in the town because Jack is an idiot," Petra said, "or we die in a cave because of Ranger Rick and his death squad. Sounds like the town is the better option."

Petra picked up her glasses and dusted them off. She always looked good in glasses and would sometimes wear frames for the look. Of course, if these didn't work, it would give a whole new meaning to 'die young and leave a good-looking corpse'.

***

A little while later, they approached the gate wearing their Clark Kent glasses, holding their heads low in hopes of going by unnoticed. They had waited until the road going into town was busy with merchants and peasants, thinking they would slip in with the crowd. However, a guard had spotted them and said, "Hey, you there, halfling. Come here."

Petra glanced around for another halfling on the road, but there weren't any. She was the only one. Jonathan danced around her while she walked up to the guard. She thought about asking him to stay back with the group, but that would be more suspicious. The guard eyed her and then Jonathan. He called another guard over.

"Hey, Jawin," he yelled. "Get over here."

"Do all guard names end with 'win'?" Petra muttered.

The second guard, Jawin, trotted over and said, "What?"

Petra smiled. "Oh, it's just that in the capital, there was another guard named Edwin."

"That's me brother. There are six of us. All named a variation of the name 'win'. Of course, then there's me cousin, Corwin. Not very original of his folks if you ask me, but they are dead now. So is his brother. Choked on a chicken bone."

"Uncanny," Tim said, as he trotted over to see about the holdup.

The first guard said, "Remember that wind message we got? About detaining Lord Lovantus and the members of the Silent Legion? Doesn't he look like him?"

"That bloke there? It can't be. Lovantus doesn't wear glasses," Jawin said.

"But say he did wear the specs. Would that look like him?"

"I suppose," Jawin said. "But it's a moot point because who in their right mind would let the Lord of our realm wear glasses."

"She looks like Lady Sorsha in glasses. Come to think of it, those folks there are wearing them, too!"

"You think the Silent Legion wears spectacles? Do you, eh? You think they could take down a necromancer if they couldn't see him? You think Bolt could hit a button on someone's jacket from a hundred yards away with specs? Think man!"

"I'm just saying. Maybe we should call it in."

"And be the laughingstock of the guards' barracks?" Jawin scoffed. "Sorry, ma'am, you can run along. My friend here needs some serious education about guard duty."

Jonathan was tugging on her sleeve, asking for a treat. She took the opportunity and gathered her child, then bolted into the town with the others.

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