I kneeled in front of the butsudan, placing an apple next to the burning incense, before closing my eyes and pressing my hands together in prayer.
“Good morning mama. Hope everything is ok. Thanks for letting me use your thread and stuff yesterday, it was really helpful. I think dad was worried I’d lose some of your needles, but I counted, and there all still there”
I paused, glancing at time. 10:14.
“Uh… I know you’re probably mad that I’m skipping school again, but I swear I’m getting better at going. I promise from today I’ll try harder to not use any excuse I can to skip classes, but if I don’t get any better I’ll make sure Ryo’s not as bad as me when he grows up. Anyway, I’m running late for. Love you. I’ll talk to you later”
I stood up slowly and backed away from the shrine before grabbing my bag and rushing for the door. I slipped into my shoes, then hurried out the apartment, quickly closing the door behind me. Jogging down the hall I righted my bag, pulling it on properly before zipping down two flights of stairs, through the lobby and out into the street. My feet beat hard against the floor in a steady rhythm as I ran towards the bus stop. The street was crowded, and I weaved between people before turning the corner and spotting the bus. With an extra burst of speed I rushed forward, accidental knocking somebody and sending them stumbling.
“Sorry!” I yelled out to them before rushing onto the bus. I came to a stop, and practically fell into a seat before taking steady breaths before wiping a thin layer of sweat off my brow with my wrist. Geez, you’d think I’d be in better shape given all the climbing I do. Eh, it’s just my endurance that’s bad. I can work on it eventually.
Sitting up, I looked out the window, watching closely as cars and buildings moved by. I pulled off my bag, wincing as one of the plasters on my finger twisted against the fabric of my bag strap. Ow. I flexed my fingers again, inviting another stab of pain. That wasn’t good. Well, I could fight through it during climbing, or just not to use the finger. Think of it like a challenge. At the very least it couldn’t be any harder than anything I’d done yesterday. With the costume stuff on Friday Dad had made the wise decision of goading me into fixing up the costume earlier than the day before in case anything had gone wrong.
It'd been hard. Well not all of it. Washing the costume was easier than I expected. There weren’t any labels on it, which was a bit weird, so I’d just prayed and thrown it into the machine on a random low heat wash. It hadn’t shrunk so no big deal. The hard part had been the stitching. I’d had no idea what I was doing, and now I had a ton of plasters with practically nothing to show for it. The suit looked worse, off in spots where I’d misaligned the pattern, and there were still a few small holes in the back that I’d been too tired to stitch up. But hey, at least I’d had red thread. Even if it was slightly off colour.
The bus came to a stop, and I got off. I took in my surroundings as I made my way through the streets, before looking up at the morning sky. Ah, it really was a great day to skip school. I grinned, slowing and strolling inside the reception for the climbing gym. I walked through to the changing rooms changed quickly and stepped out into the mostly empty gym. Micah and a few others who liked to show up early were already here, hard at work.
I waved at Micah as I began stretching before warming up with the empty beginners section.
“Hey Yu” Micah said, making his way over.
“Hey” I said, dropping down and landing.
“You wanna practice the speed course”
“Nah, I’m just gonna take it easy,”
“You sure? I mean we’ve got the gym competition coming up”
“I don’t know about that”
“So, you’re not gonna compete?”
“When have I ever competed?”
“Just because you haven’t doesn’t mean you shouldn’t”
“You suck at convincing people”
“Hey, I’m just trying to get you to compete. I mean, you’d probably do well. You’re here all the time, even when you shouldn’t be”
“Aren’t you here all the time too?”
“I work here and you’re practically here more than me”
“No I’m not”
“Ok, I might be exaggerating, but for a kid in the middle of his first term at highschool you’re here an awful lot”
“Cause it’s fun! Rock climbing makes me feel cool”
“Yeah, it’s fun, but you shouldn’t be missing class. I’m serious”
“Missing the occasional class isn’t that bad”
“Look Yu, I know you enjoy climbing and all, but it’s not good to skip school. Even if it is just ‘one or two classes’” he said adding air quotes.
“I know, I know. But it just feels pointless when you’re as dumb as me”
“Didn’t you have to test to get into your highschool?”
“Yeah, but that doesn’t make me any less dumb”
“You’re not dumb Yu”
“Well it sure feels like I am”
Micah didn’t respond, so I stretched my arms upwards then looked back up at the wall.
“I better get back to practicing”
“I know it’s probably not my place, but is everything ok? At school I mean”
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“Yeah? Why?” I responded, frowning. He’d never asked anything like this before.
“You’re not being bullied or anything?”
“N-no” I stuttered. My mind instantly flashed to Thomas, and Michah frowned.
“You can tell me you know? I can help if you need”
“I- I’m not getting bullied” I said.
“Someone you know?”
“Eh? Can you read minds or something?” I said. Micah offered a small smile before his face grew serious.
“What happened?” he asked.
“I… there’s this kid. Thomas. He’s been getting bullied by these guys basically since we started school. I want to help him but I just… I don’t know. I chickened out when I tried and everything else just seems hopeless”
“Do any of your teachers know? Have you told any of them?”
“No. I chickened out on that too” I said, shrinking away.
“Why?”
“I guess I was just scared they’d start to mess with me too if they found out. I… ”
”I’m not judging. But if you want to, you can still tell a teacher. I mean it’s never too late to do the right thing, you know?”
”Where is this sudden profoundness coming from man?” I said, chuckling.
“It’s just advice from a friend. And try not to beat yourself up. Just try to fix your mistake” Micah said. I nodded, some hope returning. I guess I could tell a teacher. There had to be some way to make an anonymous tip about bullying in school, or I could just go straight to head of year. Hopefully that would kickstart something.
“Yu?” Micah asked.
“Huh?”
“You kind of zoned out. Everything alright?”
“Yeah… I think I need to go to school”
-
I sat in a teacher’s office, tapping my finger against my leg anxiously.
“So let me get this straight. You want to report bullying?”
“Yes Miss”
Mrs Phillips, the head of freshman and Assistant vice principal, stared at me judgingly before sighing and taking off her glasses.
“Mr Onomae first I think it’d be more reasonable to discuss your several absences and lates”
“I came here to talk about that too. I promise I’ll try to be better, but we really need to discuss this whole bullying thing. Can we do that first?”
She furrowed her brow, before leaning back in her chair.
“Fine, since it seems to bother you so much. What’s wrong?”
“James and his friends are bullying Thomas. Thomas Gargan. They mess with him all the time, from small stuff like taking his things to more serious offences like beating him up. They were beating him up in the toilet yesterday”
“James who?”
“James… Hayes. I think”
“Right” she said tapping away at her keyboard before glancing at the screen. “Do you have any evidence?”
“I… no. But I swear it’s true. You can ask others, or Thomas himself”
“That’s Thomas Gargan?”
“Yeah. I think so”
“Alright, we’ll have a talk with them to try and sort it out”
“Just a talk?”
“Well, you haven’t given me any proof of this, so there’s not much I can do. If there is something happening, I’m sure we can get to the bottom of it by talking to one another and if there isn’t then no harm no foul”
“I don’t think just talking to them wi-”
“Leave the disciplinary action to me, Mr Onomae. Now, on to your attendance. I think something as serious as this requires a detention and some kind of phone call home”
-
I sat at the lunch table alone, grumbling to myself. That had been completely and utterly pointless. I’d been swept up in the throes of Micah’s uplifting words and just embarrassed myself. Thomas would probably get the shit kicked out of him when James found out that someone had reported his bullying. If they were clever, they might even clue in onto the fact that I’d told the teachers. Crap. I had it bad enough as it was with this whole loner thing, I didn’t need to get bullied too. Crap. I might have to transfer.
Could I give Dad a good enough reason? This school was good on paper so unless I managed to get into another great school then there was no chance. I couldn’t tell him about the bullying though, then he’d just come in and make a scene. I pressed my chin harder into my fist. This wasn’t good. I’d basically signed my own death warrant.
I shook my head. There was no point getting all twisted up in knots about possibilities. Now was all I had to worry about. I’d been stuck with a detention and Dad was getting a phone call. That really was bad. If he got the numbers on how many classes I’d missed, I could say goodbye to my phone, any videogames, and he’d probably stop me from going to climbing too. It’d only be for one or two weeks, but it still sucked. I groaned again. This whole thing could’ve been avoided if I’d just stayed at climbing.
With a sigh, I stood, taking my tray over to the bin and throwing what was left of the slop before putting it on the pile of other trays. Slowly, I trudged out of the hall, my feet dragging as I made my way through the school. What did I have once lunch ended? English? Oh this was going to be so boring. Should I leave? No, if they realised I hadn’t shown up to afternoon classes before they called my old man., I was seriously screwed. Plus, I’d promised Mama. I had to at least try.
A loud bang shook me from my stupor. I spun around, turning to see James and his friends standing around Thomas as he lay on the ground. Shit! Heart in my mouth, I darted back around the corner as their twisted laughter echoed through the hall.
“Sorry man. I didn’t see you” one of James’ friends said laughing. I peered round the wall to see the group chuckling amongst themselves. James bent down and lifted Thomas off the floor with ease, slamming him against the lockers.
“Woah, bit unsteady on your feet, aren’t you?” he said, laughing in his face.
I hid again, my mind racing. Was I the only one seeing this? I had to do something right? Crap, what did I do, my mind was going blank. Could I even do anything? I mean going out there would be suicide. I’d done enough already, right? I’d told the teacher. If that wasn’t enough to stop this it wasn’t my fault. I didn’t have to put myself in harm’s way just to help Thomas, right? Right?
“Hey!” A familiar voice cut through the air “Knock it off James”
I looked back around the corner to see Emma, now standing between James and Thomas who was once again on the floor.
“Oh fuck off. I’m just trying to help him up” James said trying to push past her.
“I said knock it off” Emma said, shoving him back. James stumbled and caught himself against the lockers on the far side of the hall. As he straightened out his entire demeanour shifted, and he stepped towards Emma fists balled.
“I-it’s fine! Really” Thomas called out, scrambling up. “He was just trying to help me up”
“Bullshit” Emma said.
“Just leave us alone. I mean even Thomas is saying your overreacting” one of Thomas friends said. Emma looked between the group before turning to James.
“Fine. But I think you guys should leave first” Emma said, glaring at him.
James looked around the hall, noticing everyone watching the commotion. He stepped back, hands raised in mock surrender.
“Alright, alright” he said. ”But don’t forget to meet me afterschool Tommy. I’ve got a little thank you gift”
He turned and began walking down the hall, his posse following behind him.
I hid back behind the corner and deflated, slumping against the wall. A mixture of shame and relief swirled through my gut as my hands clenched my bag straps tighter. I can’t believe my first reaction had been to hide. Thomas was lucky Emma was here. She really was fearless.
“Yu?”
“Eh?” I said looking up. Emma stared at me blankly, with Thomas trailing slightly behind her. “Oh hi”
“Did you see that?” she said to me, before glancing down the hall at James and his friends. “Disgusting”
“Y-yeah” I mumbled back. She turned to Thomas.
“You shouldn’t try to cover for them like that. And don’t even think about going to them afterschool”
“O-ok” he replied.
“Actually, come on Thomas, let’s go to Mrs Phillips”
“Oh it’s okay. I’m fine. Just a bit of playful roughhousing”
“You sure? It looked like just roughhousing to me, right Yu?”
“I-I don’t know” I said, laughing awkwardly. Emma furrowed her brow, glancing between the two of us her expression a mixture of disappointment and confusion.
“You sure you don’t want to do anything Thomas?”
“Yeah”
“Suit yourself. Bye” she said, walking away. Thomas glanced at me, and momentarily our eyes locked. A world of information passed between us, with one emotion more poignant in his expression than the rest. Anger.
He was angry at me? Why? Because I’d left him behind yesterday? I looked away, feeling a greater wave of shame. He walked off without a word and I looked back up watching as they both walked away, my shoulders slumping in shame. Now I really wanted to leave.