The party was nicer than I’d expected it to be. Big Sis had put up decorations around the apartment and now that everyone was here the place felt lively. It was nice. With all the soft lights Big Sis was so big on, the beautiful smell from the entrée of foods for everyone and the music.

The laughs and chatter too; just the company in general, the presence of family and friends. It felt normal. Peaceful. I smiled from my seat in the corner and took another sip from my drink before leaning against Yerin. She glanced up to me and smiled.

“You having fun?” she asked.

“Yeah” I mumbled back.

“Good” she smiled, taking my hand. She squeezed it slightly and I squeezed back, glancing around the room as I nodded to myself. There was an atmosphere of coziness, a comforting warmth to it all. It reminded me of our old home. This one was newer, but not really new anymore. We’d been here almost three years now. I guess we’d shared a lot of memories here too.

It made the news I was about give a little bittersweet. I was finally getting a chance to relax after the whole parallel dimension fiasco, and I was going to ruin it with a selfish, maybe even unnecessary announcement.

Maybe I shouldn’t?

No, that’d just lead to more problems down the road. If they found out without me telling them, I’d only drive us apart again. And I probably couldn’t keep up the lie.

I glanced to Sofia who spoke to her friends, then to Maria, Quinten, Alexandra and Aunty, then finally Big Sis. Big Sis looked back to me and smiled, before turning to one of her co-workers and laughing at a joke.

Everyone seemed happy now. It could wait for a bit.

-

“Are you serious man? This is the perfect time to get a tattoo” Rion said.

“You’re insane” Eric responded.

“If you get it on your back or something your parents will literally never even know”

“What if go to the beach or something?”

“They don’t have beaches in Minnesota”

“They have lakes. If I go swimming with my dad, I’m screwed”

“Then get it on your leg. Come on man” Rion said before turning to us. ”Guys, what do you think?”

“I think you should both get tattoos of each other” I joked.

“I’m serious Lucas” Rion said. “He said he really wanted a tattoo last year and now he's being all flaky. Is this cause you broke up with Rachael?"

Eric shot him a glare.

“Rion, I think you should leave it be” Yerin said. “I can literally see Eric getting less and less enthusiastic about this whole thing by the second.”

“She’s right man. The more you push this thing the less I want to do it”

“Ok, ok” Rion said. “Buuuut… what about next summer?”

I glanced away as the others chuckled, looking around the room. Almost everyone had left now, with only closer family members lounging about, a game of monopoly set up on the and the music turned lower. My heart jumped slightly but I shook my head then nodded, shifting uncomfortably in my seat.

“Lucas?” Yerin said.

“Hm?”

“You okay?”

“Yeah, yeah” I said. “Just my side”

“You need me to move?” she said, sitting up on the beanbag.

“No, it’s fine. I’m ok”

Suddenly the front door flew open with a bang.

“I’m back bitches” Sofia called out.

“Sofia!” Aunty and Big Sis cried out.

“Sorry, sorry” she said, as she walked into the living room. Her eyes instantly darted to the board. “Hey, did you start without me?”

“No way” Maria said, grinning. “You ready to lose?”

“No chance. We picked teams yet?” she said as everyone made their way closer to the board.

“It’s you and Quinten, Alexandra and Maria, Big Sis and Aunty, Yerin and Me, and Eric and Rion, though Rion might have to leave early” I said.

“Perfect” Sofia said, rubbing her hands together as she and everyone else took their places around the board. Yerin sat next to me on the beanbag, as the general mutterings of the teams scheming filtered through the room.

“Alright everyone” Big Sis said. “Roll for turns and pick pieces first to last”

“We know” Sofia said taking the dice. She rolled them and groaned, a combined roll of three.

"Our turn" Rion said snatching the dice of the table. He rolled quickly, both die landing on fours. "Oh yeah" he said, grinning as he looked to Sofia and Quinten.

"Oh, screw you" Quinten said, chuckling. Yerin picked the dice of the table next and handed them to me, smiling warmly.

I looked down at the board, die in hand and sighed. There wasn’t really a point in waiting was there? There was no way I’d be able to focus on this game and everyone was here. We could all play afterwards as well. Guess I was doing it now then.

“Uh... ok... guys” I mumbled. “I’ve got something to say”

“Oh, just roll the dice” Sofia said.

“Sofia” Aunty said. “What is it, Lucas?”

“It’s about… why I was gone”

The room went silent, the coziness evaporating in an instant. I bit my lip and looked to the board again, feeling everyone’s gazes piercing me.

“Oh look, a three” I chuckled awkwardly. “That’s pretty bad”

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“Lucas” Big Sis said. “Talk to us”

I looked back up at everyone, taking in their expressions before looking back to the board. For a moment, I closed my eyes then let out a breath.

“I hope this doesn’t change anything for any of us. I know it will, that some of you might hate me, some of you might feel guilt, anger even that I didn’t tell you this sooner. But I thought… I thought I was passed this. I thought I’d never have to think about it again, even though it was always in the back of my mind. A bit pathetic really, but I guess it came with a few perks. But some people helped me realise that this isn’t going away” I said, clenching as I looked at my fist. “And I can either, run away, let it eat me up for the rest of my life living a lie, even if it was nice in some ways, or do something with it. Help people. And all any of the best people in my life have ever wanted to do is help people. So… I do too”

I looked back up at everyone and took a deep breath, releasing my fist as I let my shaky hand fall back to my side.

“I’m Spider-Man” I said.

The words were met with silence. Obviously. Everyone stared at me blankly except Eric who glanced around the room, trying to gauge everyone’s reactions.

“As in, the Spider-Man. Guy in the red and blue tights?” Rion said, an unbelieving half-grin slowly appearing on his face.

“No, not that one. I was the one before. With the hoodie then the purple costume”

“Is this some kind of joke? You lose a dare?” Sofia said, scoffing.

“No, Sof, I’m serious” I said. Her grin remained for a few seconds before fading.

“S-seriously?”

“Yeah”

There was another pause.

“This is… wow” Quinten mumbled.

“But wait, wait a sec… what? Why’re you… this doesn’t make sense” Big Sis said, looking around confused.

“I can show a demonstration if you want”

“Wait Lucas, you’re serious?” Maria said.

“Yeah, I know it’s a lot but-”

“Can you actually show us? Like climb on the wall or something?” Sofia said. I nodded and stood from the beanbag, glancing to a wide eyed Yerin.

“Wait you’re hurt don’t-” Auntie started.

“It’s fine Auntie” I said. I took a deep breath and turned to the wall before carefully climbing up the side. I took a second, then glanced back to see everyone staring at me eyes even wider

“Holy shit!” Sofia cried.

“S-sof” Aunty muttered.

“Sorry” Sofia mumbled. “…can I record this?”

“No” I said, hurriedly, landing on the floor. “That’s- this has to be a secret. A seriously big secret that none of you can ever tell anybody. Seriously”

There was another long pause, some people exchanging glances.

“Why did you… I don’t understand”

“I’m sorry. I should’ve told you sooner, but I haven’t been Spider-Man in a long time and I didn’t expect to be ever again. But now that I am… you’re all close to me. If I was going to do this again, give it a real shot, I felt like I had to tell you all, be honest with you guys from the start”

There was a moment of silence then Big Sis stood

“Is this… is this why things were so tough during your first year?”

“…yeah” I muttered.

“Oh Lucas” she said, her eyes welling up with tears.

“It’s ok” I said. “You didn’t know”

She instantly pulled me into a tight her, her entire body shaking as she struggled to hold back tears.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I’m sorry” I muttered. “I’m sorry”

We held each other as everyone looked to us, the air turning awkward. Finally, she pulled back and wiped at her eyes before looking up to me.

“Alright… ok” she muttered, her voice shaky. I nodded, then looked to everyone else in the

“I’m sorry, everyone. Aunty and Quinten especially”

“W-what? Why?” Quinten said.

“Uncle Jamie… I was…” I brought a hand to my face pressing my knuckle against my brow and let out a heavy breath. ”I’m sorry”

The room was completely silent now, and I stared at the floor for a few moments. Then I looked up, glancing to Yerin and let out a sigh.

“I… this is a lot I know… sorry. I’m- uh…I’m… I need to talk to Yerin privately for a sec, give you all some time to digest this” I said. “I’m sorry”

Yerin looked around then nodded quickly and stood, rushing over to me. Together we quickly made our way to my bedroom where I closed the door behind me softly.

We stood in silence for a few seconds, before I looked up at her.

“Sorry”

“I… no, it’s fine” she muttered.

“It’s a lot I know” I mumbled.

“And… how”

“Parallel dimension thing. Got swapped with a different me. He didn’t do anything weird right?”

“No, he just… he disappeared for like a day, then had dinner with me and the rest of your family. I thought you were just acting distant or something but… yeah. After that I didn’t see him again. I guess he was the new Spider-Man on the news” she mumbled.

I nodded, pinching the fabric of my jeans between my fingers to distract myself. We stood in silence for a while before I grit my tee. Time to swallow the bullet.

“I… I know this is a lot, but…. do you… are you still ok with this… with us?”

“What?”

“Do you… do you still want to be with me?” I mumbled.

“Of course. I wouldn’t- of course Lucas?!”

“Yerin I-“

“Did you think I’d break up with you because of this? Because you hid”

“…maybe”

“Don’t be silly. It’s not like you were hiding something horrible”

I was silent for a second before speaking again.

“No, Yerin… I know you. I wasn’t worried you’d break up with me because I lied to you about this, well, I was, but… I was more worried we’d break up because I’m going to be Spider-Man”

“What?”

“I… it’s going to take up a lot my time and it’s dangerous and”

“Lucas?!” she said, almost offended. “Seriously?”

“Yerin, I know. But… just think about it. It’s… it’s dangerous. Really dangerous.”

“I can handle it” she said, but a note of uncertainty tinged her voice.

“Yerin it’ll be my first priority” I said. “If we’re on a date and I hear about something I’ll go. If we have something planned and I found out someone’s in danger, I’ll go. Always. I’ll try to make time for you, to be with you but it’ll… it might come between us. And I really, really don’t want you to resent me because of that so… I wanted to ask you know. Rather than just forcing you into it, I want to know if it’s ok for you. Really ok”

“Is it… that important to you?” she whispered.

I looked to the ground.

“Uh… when I was in the other world, I remembered, really remembered when my parents died. Before all I could remember was the fire. But now, I remember my dad. He saved us, all. He knew the car might explode and he ran back to the car anyway. My sisters are here because of him. I’m here because of him. It… it wasn’t my fault but… I let his sacrifice go to waste for a long time. I don’t want to anymore. If there’s someone, somewhere that needs to be saved, I want to help them. Always.”

She went silent for a while, then looked me over.

“You got really injured. Was that…” she trailed off.

“Yeah” I mumbled. She nodded averting her gaze.

“This is… this is tough” she said.

“I know” I mumbled. She glanced back up at me, then took my hand staring at it.

“Do you… no that’s silly” she mumbled. “What if… what if it kills you?”

“It’ll have been a life well lived”

I felt her grip my hand tightly for a second, then she let go.

“There’s… there’s other Spider people, other heroes”

“Yerin”

“Right, right… sorry” she mumbled, before returning to silence.

“It’s ok if you need time to think about it” I mumbled. She nodded, staring at the floor before taking a shaky breathy as her eyes grew wet. She wiped at them quickly, but it didn’t help.

“You’re so… you know I can’t ask you to stop if this means so much to you, to tell you to put me before the rest of the world, no matter how much I want to. I… I want to be with you… but I can’t spend the rest of my life worrying about you constantly, worrying about you being hurt, or taken away from me or anything we build together.”

“…I won’t ask you to if you don’t want to”

“I mean… if we stay together, we’d have kids eventually, right?” she said. My eyes widened, the words like a punch to the gut. I hadn’t even thought that far ahead, but now that I was I felt my heart start to sink.

“I… I don’t want to break up” she said, through tears. “But… you’re going to do this. And I… what if one day I just come home and see on the news that… I’m sorry… I can’t”

“It’s ok”

“No, it’s… fuck… fuck” she cried. I stepped forward to pull her into a hug, but she pulled away.

“S-sorry” I mumbled.

“No, it’s fine. Sorry” she said. She rushed towards me and wrapped me into a tight hug. My eyes began to tear up as I hugged her back, holding her tightly as she sobbed into my chest. I looked up to the ceiling, trying and failing to blink back the tears.

We held each other for a while, before the tears finally slowed. Yerin pulled away and took a few seconds to compose herself, then wiped her eyes and flashed a saddened smile at me.

“I… well… I guess this is it then”

“Yeah” I said sadly. We stood in silence as I felt my heart shatter into a million pieces. I glanced to Yerin’s face, her expression a mirror of mine. She looked up at me from the floor and sniffled.

“I… thanks for everything, Lucas. Really. It was nice”

“Yeah” I said, forcing a sad smile. “It was nice”

We nodded, awkwardly standing in silence with each other before I glanced to her one more time, offered a sad smile.

“Uh… yeah. You can stay in here a while if you want. I should probably-”

“Yeah- no, no don’t… it’s fine. Don’t let me keep you from everyone else”

I nodded, then slowly turned to door, my mind quiet. As I reached for the handle, she spoke again.

“Good luck Lucas. Seriously” she said. “I’ll be cheering for you”

I turned back to her, my smile returning as I nodded gratefully.

“Thanks. Good luck with the physics stuff”

She nodded, sniffling slightly.

“Thanks”