Chapter 16
Rabbit hole²
-Isaac-
The door to my room stopped shaking. In fact it somehow opened up only to reveal an empty hallway. There was no one there. I was half expecting a monster to come and eat me.
Taking a peek didn't really tell me anything. The hallway was dark, cold, and slightly moist. It looked like the guild castle but it’s also not that. Everything felt slightly more…. I don’t know, eerie? The only source of light was this glowing blue moss that seemed to cling to the walls.
I didn’t feel scared not like last time. This time around I was feeling cautious with a side of wonder and curiosity. Now that I had a moment to think about my predicament I realized that not only did that thing want to eat me. It also wanted me scared. Like some kind of bully.
Once I understood that it kind of pissed me off. That was good. I wanted a little pay back for all the torture that thing put me through and was finally in the right mindset to do so. It’s been haunting my dreams for the longest. I don’t even remember when it started. All I know is it’s gotten worse.
This felt like realizing you were in a dream only I didn’t have control over it. Was that normal? Also why was everything so vivid?
The hallways were like a maze. It’s way bigger than it should be and everything is strange looking. Darker, sharper, slightly elongated. Like it had been stretched or warped. kind of like that old Nixon tattoo my dad drunkenly got on his back.
It looked like the hallways and rooms were shifting. At one point I found myself walking on the ceiling. Then the wall and finally the hallways kept repeating, but each time they'd be slightly warped in a different way.
Sometimes they'd become narrow. Other times they were wider. Then there was the hallways that zig-zaged and went up or down In a slope. Sometimes the hallway would go straight up or down.
I was starting to think I might of no-clipped into the new worlds version of the backrooms. I figured I’d need a weapon to fight off the monster so I picked up one of the long swords on the wall.
The sword was somewhat rusty. It was made of carbon steel. With the moist walls it only made sense it would oxidize. It didn’t even have a sheath. Poor thing needed a good polishing and some oil. At least that's what my internet browsing told me.
I owned two swords in the old world. One was more of a prop for practice and the other was a real honest to god sword. I had it made by a modern day blacksmith. It cost me a little over Five-hundred with shipping.
The blade was tempered steel. I didn't really use it for anything. It was just cool to have on my wall. Of course I cleaned it once a week and applied oil to it. The sword was of Chinese origin. The seller called it a Gale Wind Ming Jian from the Ming dynasty. Not an original but a battle ready replica. I feel bad for who ever breaks into my home.
The sword in my hands was kind of heavy but I could still swing it. It was one of the more traditional long swords. The kind a paladin might carry during the crusades. It had a golden cross guard with a ruby slotted in the middle. The handle was rounded with black leather wrapped around the handle. The pommel was of the same gold as the cross guard.
I basically dragged it along which was probably a bad idea considering all the noise it made but whatever. At the very least the tip was slowly being sharpened. Or not, for all I knew I was basically blunting the weapon. That was fine to since it would hurt more.
I hated all the build up and just wanted the monster to come out so we could get this over with. This wasn’t some stupid horror film. I got beef with that fucking thing. It’s fucked with me for the last time.
Either I kill it or it eats me. Getting eaten is usually how it goes, but not today. Even if it eats me I’ll make sure to stab it from the inside.
I swung my blade around. “ Hee-ya! Hya! Take that centipede! I’m gonna make her vomit blood I tell ya!” I got no answer. Under my breath I murmured “coward”
I felt strange. Something wasn't right. I felt like I was actually physically here. My body had weight and everything was as solid as that time I tried Viagra. I could actually feel the strain from swinging the weapon around.
I made it to a new hallway and found that this one had an actual window. I made my way over and took a peak. Outside was…. strange. It looked like giant weirdly shaped penises in the distance. Oh, those aren’t penises! There giant mushrooms!
There were no other structures. Instead it was just wilderness. The grass was unkempt and messy. It glowed a bright green almost like it was radioactive. Some of the mushrooms were the size of bushes. Others were as tall as trees. Speaking of trees there were none.
Something told me this vegetation was the only light source in this place. Each mushroom glowed a different radiant color. The sky was empty. It wasn't black. It was a colorless void. Endless and vast just like every other void in my life.
Despite being unable to see through that darkness I somehow knew it was completely empty. Staring at it filled me with an irrational feeling of dread. Like I was all alone.
Normally when you look at the sky there’s a ton of stars. A decent amount of those stars are planets, but here it was as if this was the only planet in existence.
How was this place even functioning? The grass must provide oxygen somehow. Where was the grass getting its food? Water was one thing but doesn’t it need sunlight?
Without sun light how can anything grow. There has to be some kind of energy in this place otherwise it would be freezing cold. Everything here was warm. The air was room temperature and very humid. Kind of like the humidity you might feel in a tropical area, or Huston.
Did that mean this place was powered by something inside the planet? Then again I think this is a dream so the world was probably held together through imagination. Ah.... in which case I should stop thinking about it before the planet freezes over and I’m plunged into eternal darkness.
I looked away before my two brain cells had a panic attack. What was this place. It wasn’t like a dream. The usual brain fog that came with these sorts of things wasn’t effecting me.
I continued on my expedition through the castle. The end of the hall turned left then went right finally opening up into a large room.
This was the throne room. I could see my throne sitting against the back wall. However, there was a hole in the center of the room.
The room was lit up by the tiny mushrooms growing from cracks in the stone and moss that hung from the ceiling. The hole was huge. I couldn’t even see the bottom of it.
It kept me from reaching the throne. The narrow path it left was cracked and looked like it might crumble at a glance.
Something told me I needed to sit on the throne. The giant stone construct was covered in gold. Jewels glittered from the low light provided by the radioactive vegetation. Forget paying rent with that chair I could buy a nice house near the beach.
The seat had pelts of magical beasts layered over it. It was just like the one in the actual guild castle.
This place. It wasn’t the guild but it held parts of it. Things that only I’ve seen before. The grass and mushrooms outside were from the game to. It was actually one of my favorite biomes in TEO. The glowing mushroom forest. It was missing the trees but it still looked cool.
Just where the hell was I? I looked into the hole. It was so dark. I couldn’t even tell how deep it was. Something was moving.
I’m unsure how to describe it. Once I changed my perspective it made more sense. Instead of trying to find the thing moving in the dark. I watched the dark itself and realized it was vibrating.
Familiar razor sharp teeth — only far bigger and more vast — spun around the darkness like shark fins sticking out of dark waters. Waters so deep they were as black as a moonless night.
I heard a metallic growl. It skipped like a corrupted sound file. The darkness rose up forming a massive all to familiar centipede. If the centipede from my dreams was a baby then this would be its fat obese mother.
This time I wasn’t afraid. Okay, maybe a little but I wasn’t crippled. My anger seemed to outshine the fear. I held my sword up ready to stab that thing. Hopefully the rust would give it an infection.
*BUZZZzzZzZzZzzzZZzZzzzzZZZZzz*
The buzzing was so loud. It made my ears ring. This was the source! I just knew it! I'm gonna end this.
It lunged at me as a whirlwind of blades. I thrust my sword forward and managed to pierce its shadowy hide. The beast cried my name in its monstrous echo.
My vision became distorted and images of my childhood flashed before my eyes. Was I dying? No there’s something different about these memories. I didn't remember them. No I do remember them but not like this.
It’s like I remember point A and point B but I couldn't remember how I got from one to the other. How come I never noticed the gaps? These weren’t all the memories but what I saw made my body tremble. Pain, fear, loneliness.
My mother forcing me to stand outside in the snow naked. The cold air cutting deep into my skin. The crying and begging. Trembling in the cold. Huddling near the door trying to keep warm. My sister crying and yelling at my mom to let me inside.
The pain of being continually beaten with a cable while being forced to undergo a cold freezing shower. The words Devil child chanted over and over again and the self hatred that came with them. She convinced me to hate myself. To believe in her words. Mom how could you do that to me!
Was this why my sister Julia was always coddling me? She used to make me sleep in her room after she caught mom trying to suffocate me with a pillow. I think she almost killed me a few times. I can remember the pain of desperately trying to breathe only to be denied a breath.
So much pain. Was this my pain? I don’t remember it being quite like this. All the emotions that came with these experiences. They flooded my mind and made me want to curl up and die. How the hell could I live like this. I chose life every time.
How could anyone be that cruel! I was a kid! What did I do to deserve something like that! Why didn’t anyone stop her! My neighbors, they knew about it! I know they did! My family! Aunts, uncles, cousins. They saw what was going on but they never did anything! My vision distorted again and I was back to fighting the monster. Tears covering my cheeks.
My sword had been ripped away from me and I was knocked to the cold hard ground. I tried to stand by pressing my right hand down but I didn't feel anything. That's when I noticed my arm was gone. Blood rushed from the wound.
“Shit!”
Something grabbed my other arm and pulled me to my feet. “We have to go!” I got a look at them. It was Aku.
There was no time to question it so I ran along her side. The monster cried in pain reeling back into it’s hole. Black ooze seemed to spill out of the wound I caused it.
“Isssssssssssaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaac!” it tried to call for me in its chalk board screech. Like most life threatening things in my life, I ignored it. Ignore it till it gets itchy and turns purple.
My arm was gone and the blood seemed to slow to a trickle. It was almost like the wound had closed or something.
The pain was numbed by the adrenaline running through me…. I think? I feel like I should be in way more pain right now.
It looked like I was a little taller than Aku but what was she doing here? It’s only ever been the monster and I. I thought she was just an avatar.
She was dressed different. She wore a violet colored dress you’d only ever see in one of those Disney princess movies. On her feet were sparkly violet slippers. Her hair was twice as long, but the most shocking thing was those bandages wrapped around her arms. They looked dirty.
She led me down multiple halls until we found a perfectly pristine white door. “This way!” She pushed the door open and stepped into a bright light.
The door closed behind me and I found myself in what I would describe as a girl’s room. Everything was pastel colored. There were all sorts of toys mostly dolls and plushies.
In one corner was a kids bed. There was a dresser and a closet full of dresses. The room was small. I guess for a kid it was big but not by much.
Aku walked to the center of the room taking a seat on a small plastic chair. There were four other seats. One was empty while the other three had Snowball, Mr. Ghost, and Chompy. I didn't think Chompy was so important that he’d need a seat to himself. Maybe he was just here to fill a seat.
I couldn't help but feel like this was planned. Was this some kind of intervention? I was half expecting for a talking pillow to be passed around as the plushies talked about my addiction to coffee, and how there's a twelve step program that can really help me get my life back together.
Those programs are so annoying. They always end with finding religion. Not that there's anything wrong with religion I just feel like it shouldn't be the go to when talking with a doctor. Oh what’s that doctor Phil — who isn't an actual doctor — your taking me to the ranch? Well what are we waiting for let’s go!
Aku motioned for me to sit. I did. It was kind of bizarre. Aku served me a cup of what looked like tea. I wasn’t sure. It smelled funny and had actual steam coming off it.
There was some sugar cubes on the table so I put a few in my cup and stirred it with what I assumed to be a tea spoon. It was tiny. I wasn’t actually looking forward to it but it would be rude if I didn’t accept her hospitality. I’d describe it as hot leaf juice.
My arm was no longer bleeding. I had no idea how that came about. It didn’t even hurt. I'm tired of the rules changing. Why can't reality just go back to normal already. It’s just one rabbit hole after another. Am I gonna have to experiment again to figure out what might be able to kill me?
So…. What would this be? The newer world? That’s a stupid name. The new, new world. Nah. No wait I got it!
Return of the new world two the reckoning! Now in 3D.
I’m so done with dimension hopping. This is getting ridiculous. I'll never do shrooms again. I’ve been to so many worlds over the years. The excitement was starting to fade.
I didn’t even get to explore the last world before I got sent here. It’s like I collected a bunch of quests then decided to uninstall the game before ever doing anything.
This game felt more like an indie horror game. One of those where you learn a lesson. Or it questions morality or humanity. Take your pick. Hopefully I’ll get the good ending.
All I need now is a laptop connected to a bunch of cameras with a faulty battery and a phone with messages of the old security guy before me. That for some reason mysteriously went missing, but that's just a theory. A game theory!
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What if I was trapped in five nights at Freddie’s? Yeah, okay Isaac enough of that. I took a deep breath to center my mind. It did absolutely nothing. I’ve been stimulated to much and now my brain won’t stop making stuff up.
Was this room even safe? “Won’t the monster find us? Also…. am I gonna bleed out?” ever since I stepped in the room not a drop of blood had spilled and I was afraid I’d already lost all of it. Then again why was I still not dead?
“You’ll be okay. You just need a little time to regenerate your spirit. Drink tea it’ll help with your arm. You’ll lose less mass to. You should be more careful, if you get eaten that’s it. You don’t come back. This room is special. She can't get us here. This is my domain. She has no power here.” She took a sip of tea. I did the same.
It wasn’t coffee but I could pretend it was. My wound felt warm and it started to tingle. I watched as she poured more tea out for Snowball and her other….. companions.
Strange I didn’t feel the need to do it myself. Nor did I think they were actually alive. I still had a fondness towards them the same way one might feel when looking at a collection.
I felt more like myself than I had since going to the new world. My mind was clear and my wants were my own. They didn’t differ much from what I usually felt, but they were also less clouded with doubt. The same doubt that made me question whether an emotion was actually mine.
Now that, that doubt was gone. I could now for certain say that I did indeed throw a tantrum over candy. At least internally. Acting it out was never my intention.
There was very little anxiety to speak of. I’d still have trouble going into public for prolonged periods of time and I probably needed breaks between outings, but as I was right now.
I could probably talk with strangers without resorting to a persona or a plushy. It seemed like when in Aku’s body my anxiety was double what it normally was and in unexpected situations it just about tripled.
I scratched my head. “Okay your gonna have to slow down kiddo. How about we start with who you are?” She smiled at me. Man she was so cute! I must protect her at all costs! Now I know how Shadow and Luca must feel.
“Who I am? I’m princess Aku of course! This is my castle. Well….. it was my castle. That was till it crashed onto this miserable place and that monster ate through the floor in the throne room.” She looked a little irritated. It was also cute. Man, no wonder no one could take me seriously in Aku’s body.
Well its official I’m more confused now than ever. This must be what Shadow feels when she try’s to do math.
Was I stupid? Hmm… there’s definitely been a decline in my ability to process info. Oh man! I’m back to my Isaac brain! I tried to open my menu but apparently that was no longer a thing. Did that mean I now needed to dress myself? Oh no! My inventory! I’m gonna have to carry stuff like a god dam peasant!
From Aku’s point of view. My face became confused, then dread, then angry. Confused hopefulness, Then I looked angry as I ruffled my hair with my one hand almost pulling it out, and finally my head fell onto the table in defeat. This all happened in the spam of five seconds.
Aku’s smile wavered taking on a more confused ascetic. She gave Snowball and the other plushies a nervous look then went back to sipping tea like nothing had happened. I seemed to have that effect on everyone. Somehow I made everything awkward.
No stats, no items, no abilities, no magic, no skills, no sacred arts, no martial arts, no psychic powers, just nothing. I already knew this when I first came to this place and thought it all a dream, but still. I didn’t really think it all the way through. Not only did I have the system stripped from me. I was a one armed weak scrawny kid.
Just because my stats were gone didn’t necessarily mean I was stupid. It just meant I wasn’t as smart as I used to be. That sucks. My perception and strength is probably shit to. Oh well. I’m happy I figured it out before I tried to do anything significant.
Oh, right. I did try to do something significant. Good thing Aku was there to save me. I wonder if she’s got any powers? Probably not considering she also ran away.
“Okay, how about you tell me about this place then. This world. Possibly, how you ended up here?” She looked deep in thought.
“You don't know anything?” She tilted her head. The urge to hug and pet her was starting to really ramp up, but right now I needed answers. Also that was more than a rude thing to do to a stranger. Wait, was she a stranger? Regardless I didn’t like it when people treated me like a pet so I wasn’t gonna start doing it myself.
“No, I don't know anything. Pretend like I'm someone who's never stepped foot into this place.” It was the truth after all.
She nodded. “Well… all I know is that I was in a meadow with lots of forest creatures. Then one day a lady came to visit. She was really nice. She wanted a small peace of me, so I gave it to her. It was so small I didn't think it would hurt.” She sipped her tea fidgeting like a nervous child.
“That peace came to live in the castle. That peace was also me. More like it became the current me you see before you. I lived in the castle for many years mostly sleeping. One day while doing just that my castle crashed onto the old planet where I used to live. Only its different now.”
I understood absolutely nothing about what she just said. It all sounded like gibberish. Like when someone describes a strange dream they had, but they can’t quite remember it. All I know is that this world was different from what it used to be.
That made me ask. “How so?” She gave her tea another sip. Maybe a bit of context would help me understand.
“The world became overgrown. The animals aren’t around anymore. The trees are gone to. There used to be these giant trees that provided fruit for everyone. Those mushrooms weren't here before. I Ended up exploring the world and found you. Don’t you remember?” She smiled.
Remember? I tried to think of a time when I might of actually been here before. Somehow I managed to get flashes of memories. It was like they were always there I’d just been ignoring them for the longest.
A young Aku finding me sleeping on a mushroom bed. Then I remembered coming to this castle and…. I don’t remember the rest. I think I sat on the throne. I shook my head. Before I left something happened.
There was buzzing and a screech. I don’t know. Was it the centipede? Had to be right? But it wasn’t there yet. The sound it came from somewhere but I don’t know where. The hole wasn’t there. It was but not on the surface.
Underground. Crumbling, settling, churning, writhing, grinding, digging. All the “ings” you could think of. All under our feet. It’s not over. This world is dying. Slowly its being hollowed out.
She looked somewhat worried, but continued. “That’s okay, I remember. You already had primary control, so it was easy for you to become king. That’s when the weird stuff started to happen. There was this hole in the middle of the throne room. It kept getting bigger. There’s this buzzing to. The buzzing does something to the castle. It makes the walls move around, and it makes the plants cry. I don’t like it.”
She looked terrified. This all sounded familiar. I couldn’t help but feel like this was all my fault. What about the bandages?
“Why do you have those?” I pointed to the dirty cloth wrapped around her arms. What I thought was dirt looked more like old dried blood.
Aku looked somewhat embarrassed. I could tell she didn’t want to talk about it, so I walked over to her side and tried to undo them. I didn’t care about her privacy. What nine year old had privacy. Actually she looked more like a seven year old. Huh…. calling her a seven year old didn’t bother me at all.
She freaked out. “No! You can’t look!” She didn’t put up much of a fight. If she really wanted she could pull away but she held her arms in the same place and didn’t really try to stop me. She squirmed a little but was mostly still. Her squirming was less of a struggle and more of an anxious quirk.
It was a little hard to get them off with one hand but not impossible. “The monster hurt you right? Let me see. I wont be mad. I just wanna help.” She stopped moving entirely and turned her head. I guess she didn’t want to see my reaction. Maybe she didn’t want to see what was underneath the rags.
I undid them and what I saw was….. horrible. Cuts so deep you’d think they went down to bone. My first thought was to blame the monster but….. these cuts. They looked like they were done by a knife. Each one perfectly cut across. It reminded me of my teenage years.
“The monster didn’t do these did she?” Aku didn’t answer. She started to cry. It was soft like a child that had been hit for being noisy.
Did I cause this somehow? Was I to blame? I gave the kid a hug and she fell into me accepting it. If she’s been in this castle by herself for years….
Then when was the last time she felt human contact. I don’t think she’s ever had it. I hope the me that was here before at the very least held her hand.
Just in case I made sure to give her a real hug. The kind of embrace that made you feel safe. She was smaller than me so it was easy. I could tell she really wanted it.
After what felt like a minute I sat back down in my seat. She replaced the bandages with new ones. They seemed to come out of nothing similar to how the tea pot continued to refill itself.
Once reapplied she continued to pour everyone some more tea. I’m pretty sure you need tea bags or some sort of herb for this but somehow it came out already brewed. The liquid was a nice looking gold. Almost like piss but without the smell. The smell reminded me of honey. The taste was sweet and bitter.
It was the perfect balance between the two. It didn’t even need the sugar I put into it. Though that didn’t stop aku from dropping four of them into her cup. The plushies were actually drinking it. At least it felt like they were. Their cups seemed to drain on there own.
“Do you wanna tell me what happened to your arms? Was it my fault?” She shook her head I wasn't sure to what though.
“I did it to myself. It was…… to help you.” So it was my fault. I’m absolutely the worst.
My next words were a bit intense. “Help me how?” She already told me the hard part why not reveal the rest.
“Like when that Mantis guy tried to kidnap us. I sacrificed some of myself to change the system rules. You wanted to use all those spells and abilities. Even the monster wanted to kill that guy so I converted a part of myself into power and used it to temporarily hack the system. Doing so caused my body to crack. They look like cuts but that's just the shape they took.”
That was her! So every time I used a spell or skill that wasn't on my hot bar she was the one that made it happen. Even that wasted purification sacred art. Just so I could spam abilities. Like all those fire balls.
“Back in the dungeon. Before I talked with Mantis. There was this voice…. Well, not really a voice. That feeling that everything would be alright and the gentle touch on my head. Warm and almost weightless.” It was something so small that I kept forgetting about it. I thought it was a ghost at the time but now I wasn’t so sure.
She nodded. “That didn’t cost me anything. You just looked so sad and I wanted to make you feel better. You know I felt it to. Your emotions and memories mix with my own. I know you feel mine to.”
So I was sharing a body with this kid. That explained a few things. “I appreciate that, but will you regenerate?” If those wounds were permanent then I deserved to die.
“I will. It’s taking a little longer because the power I needed was to grate so I tore my spirit from the inside out. There’s still a handful of power left that I haven't used. I've slowly been adding to it with the ambient energy left floating around. I can still do more. I can bypass the system with my own power and make it so you have no restrictions. I wanna be useful.” I put my hand on her head. She curled in embarrassment.
Those words. “I want to be useful.” I still felt them clawing at my insides. So I guess that means Aku has it to then. Did she get it from me? It was something so ingrained in my head that I could never escape it. The feeling of never being good enough. Of always being a failure. Of being a useless peace of shit.
“Don't bother. I don't need you to mutilate yourself. I can handle it. Though, I appreciate the help you were amazing. Please promise me you wont do it again. You should save that surplus of energy for an emergency. No use in letting it go to waste.” She blushed.
“I promise…. Thanks Papa… oh!” She covered her face like a child trying to hide for a game of peekaboo. She had to know that wouldn’t work. I still enjoyed it though.
Did I hear her right? It sounded like she didn't mean to call me that. Should I pretend it didn't happen. There had to be a story there. I really wanted to tease her about it but at the same time didn’t want to make her cry.
“Do you wanna call me Papa? Is there a reason?” I really didn’t mind. It sounded cute coming from her. If anything I’d love to hear it again. Aw, crap. Does this make me a creep? Sharing a body with your daughter sounds disgusting.
She then proceeded to make a strange noise. Maybe I should of left it alone. The small girl reached for Snowball and hugged the cat plushy to her chest.
“I-I….. It’s you know. Don’t you remember when you and mamma made me.” Did I do that? You’d think I’d remember the act of procreation. She called herself princess Aku. Aku being the key word. So she had to have some connection to the avatar right? I created the avatar so….
The creation of Aku. I thought back to that day. I remember being excited because the game had just come out. Shadow said she wanted to play it and invited me to join her. Believe it or not she actually started before me. Beat me by a whole two hours.
I didn’t know the game existed until Shadow told me about it. Put down my pre-order that day. To bad my internet was down for most of that week. Something about solar flares or something.
Alice was there. She wanted to watch me play. When it came to games Alice liked to watch. She said it was fun to see me fail.
I tried to get her into some games but she was terrible. That was okay though. She had fun either way and every once in a while she would even win. She was what you’d call a sore winner. That’s why I could never go easy on her.
She glanced over my shoulder. “Why a little girl? Why not go for a big strong guy like that giant thing?” She pointed at the half giant race.
“Nah, I don’t wanna play as a half giant. I wanna try magic this time around. Vampires seem to get a nice bonus to magic. Also playing as a little kid will give me a smaller hit box. Mages typically have low HP and there gear is usually built for magic defense. She’s also really cute right?” The character on the screen had long pink hair and Dark red eyes.
Alice gave me a crooked smile. Like she didn’t agree with me. “You boxed her into one pallet of colors. I get the appeal but you should go for something more simple. That way you won’t end up having to stress out over gear not matching her color scheme.”
I hadn’t actually thought of that. With her pink hair it would limit the clothes I could give her. That would suck especially early game when you had very little access to cool gear. It was also a new game so there probably wouldn’t be much gear to pick from.
“Alright, why don’t you design her for me. I’ll tweak it when your done.” She rolled her eyes then reached over.
I watched her go through every option. It was a bit annoying to wait for her to finish, but I didn’t want to rush her.
After about fifteen minutes she sat back in her chair satisfied. I gave the character a look. Aku now had short dark brown hair and her eyes were a light brown.
“She’s cute but not over the top. Her eyes look a little dull. Let me see.” I looked through the eye options and found interesting irises I hadn’t seen before.
It was between heart shaped eyes and star shaped eyes. I let Alice pick. She gave it a once over then selected the heart ones and made them pink almost violet.
“pink?” I questioned it.
“What? You had the hair pink before what’s wrong with it. I think it’s cute. She’s kind of like a princess. She looks like she’s in love or something.” She smiled.
“She’s not a princess she’s a vampire lolita. I was gonna go with a goth lolita, but a sugar lolita would also work. Honestly there’s nothing saying I cant switch between the two. I have a lot of options now with the basic color scheme of her hair.” She was perfect.
“Izzy that’s cool and all but what are we going to name her. How about evil, cause she’s a vampire goth girl. You get it?” Izzy was my wife’s nickname for me.
I shook my head. “Evil is kind of silly and way on the nose. Might as well call her Aku instead.” Alice scratched her head.
“What’s an….Ako.” Alice wasn’t a geek like me so the name went over her head.
“Its Aku not Ako. The name means different things in different cultures, but in this context it literally means evil.” My wife rolled her eyes again. She was getting on my nerves.
“You made that up. I still like it though Let’s name her Aku then. It’s cute.” She reached over and typed it in as Akoooo. I quickly corrected her to which she pouted.
“Don’t give me that look. I’m not gonna have an avatar running around with a name spelled like that. Names spelled like that are reserved for repeat names like Aku1 or Aku2.” I hit the finalize button and the game started to download additional data. I hate when that happens.
“You know it would be nice if we could have a daughter that cute.” Except she couldn’t.
“Sure sweetie. Maybe if we keep trying it’ll happen.” I felt her fingers run along my back.
“Isaac your not suggesting we do it now are you? Isn’t your friend waiting for you?” She was so seductive. Her voice was whispering softly in my ear. My eyes fluttered out of sheer delight.
“We got twenty minutes.”
I came back to my current situation. Aku was staring at me with concern in her eyes. “Papa, you okay?”
I shook my head in an attempted to get my head out of the gutter. “Yeah I’m fine. I remember. Anyway, what now? How do I get back to the new world?”
She blinked twice. “Oh… you have to sit on the throne like last time.” Was it that simple? Right, I’m forgetting about the monster.
“The monster. Is there a way to get around without it seeing me.” That throne was hard to reach on its own, much harder with that thing running around.
“I could distract it. Then you could take the throne again.” Her plan seemed wrong to me. Even if I got the throne back what was stopping all this from happening again.
Was I gonna have to sacrifice someone new every time I came here. That seemed unsustainable. Not to mention I’d literally be sacrificing someone just to sit on a throne.
I had to ask. “You’ll die right?” She looked away.
“Its not dying. Ill be apart of the monster that’s all.” That’s all!
“Fuck that! Your not distracting anything! There has to be another way!” She didn’t say a word.
“Aku…. Come on. Think, you’ve been in this place the longest. You have to know a way.” She frowned.
“There might be a way, but you’ll have to eat the monster.” She looked unsure.
“Is that possible. Can I actually eat that thing.” She nodded in response.
“You already took a bite but your not ready yet. You know Papa. You used to be bigger, but the monster kept eating parts of you. You started to shrink. You were perfectly in control before I came here. The world is bigger now. More energy dense. That's how I made my tea pot. It’s a perfect access point for energy. Like a faucet.” That was alarming.
Did that mean I was gonna shrink even more now. I reached for the stump of an arm I had and surely enough it had grown a tiny bit.
“What a strange world we live in.” Did this mean I wasn't waking up until I got to that throne? Shit, and here I thought I might be able to run the clock out.
Aku smiled. There was no way I could just leave her like this. She lived in fear like I did. Maybe even more so. I could go out there to the…. I don’t know, physical world? I can escape to the physical world while she’s stuck in here with that thing. in this tiny room day in and day out. I was the one that made that hole. Maybe not made but I definitely filled it. It’s my fault.
How did dad do it? How did he deal with the hole? Maybe I’ve been doing it wrong. There had to be something missing. I wasn’t doing something. I got the first part down but what do I do with the surplus of pain? Who the hell knew, the old man was dead time to move on.
“Aku, you’ve been controlling our avatar body right? How did you do that? Do you have control over it?” She took a sip of tea and thought it over.
“It’s the same as when I help you use skills.” She sipped her leaf juice. What did she mean?
I sighed and motioned for her to continue. “I sacrificed parts of myself to gain small amounts of control. Sometimes I don't have to and you do things I was thinking about doing. However sometimes when I really, really want something you don't… I cut off parts of my spirit and force you. I can get away with just a pinky toe so it's an acceptable loss considering I can regenerate it in under half an hour.”
I don’t get it. Did I possess her body? What the hells going on here. “The Aku out there. Is that your body?”
She shook her head. “No, I’ve never been in control of that body. My spirits never been able to control it. I don’t think I’ve ever had a physical body…. Actually that’s wrong. I did control it for a time but that was on accident. It also made me really tired. I had to sleep for a while. Your spirit is strong that’s why your in control.”
That explained last night. She didn’t even know what she was doing. Was this kid a figment of my imagination or something? If so I’m a real sick bastard. What did she mean my spirit was stronger? I was only a little bigger than her.
If I shrink to her size will I lose the ability to move my avatar? I need more tea. I took another sip and felt the warm liquid burn the back of my throat.
“let’s just work on getting out of here.” She agreed lifting her cup as if to do a toast. I joined her and our cups clanged together. We both took long sips and I felt my lost arm pulsing. Lucky for me it seemed like my nerves were gonna be the last thing to be restored.