The Hot Topic
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Aside from using the magical forces housed within Odin’s ring to heal his aching muscles and slowly enhance his physicality back to a more athletic, flexible, and well-endowed build, Xander spent his time in the final stages of reassembling his Suzuki Scrambler. The hard repairs, painting, and fabrications were all done, and he only required another day to couple every link and tighten every fixture. Unfortunately, before he could finish, Xander met Ted once again.
The time looper was walking down the sidewalk toward Buffy’s house when he noticed Buffy and Willow coming from the opposite direction. The three friends met in her driveway and talked about his work, though Xander could tell they wanted to ask him more about the future memories his older self was able to remember. He had been intentionally vague with his friends so as to—in essence—not jinx anything, and his friends accepted that. As they walked up to her door, he could tell they were always curious to learn more.
As ever, Buffy heard the wine glass break through the walls and rushed inside, worried for her mother. In the kitchen, the Slayer abruptly stopped at the sight of Joyce in the arms of Ted, breaking their kiss. Like in every previous loop, Buffy didn’t like the traditional salesman, and Xander sided with her being far more cautious with the man. He didn’t eat Ted’s cookies or the pizza rolls he made to avoid being drugged. They all sat for dinner, and as they ate, Xander pondered ways of exposing the murderous machine within. Bringing a battleaxe to dinner as an ice-breaker and then accidentally slicing off an arm made him chuckle, but also felt a little far-fetched.
Instead, Xander asked, “Hey, Ted? You wouldn’t happen to know anything about mechanics, would you? I’m rebuilding an 84 Suzuki GS400 and I’m having the hardest time with either the clutch cable, friction plates, or possibly the crankshaft, cuz it really drags when I shift.”
Buffy, Willow, and Joyce gaped curiously at the teen boy, and an impressed Joyce remarked, “I didn’t know you were into automotive repair, Xander.”
“Yeah,” Buffy echoed, eying him in equal wonderment.
Willow figured, “Oh! Did ‘the Old Man’ help you with that?”
Xander turned to Ted and noted, “A different old man—not my dad, or anything.” Answering Willow and the girls’ curiosity, he continued, “But yeah, he started helping me figure it out, but then he left recently, and I’ve been stuck on this problem for a while. I don’t really have the money to take it to a mechanic, so I’ve been hoping to find someone who can help.”
Ted nodded, thinking it over when a suddenly concerned Joyce said, “I must admit, I was surprised a moment ago—I suppose I hadn’t expected you to say that—but now that I think about it, I’m not so sure I like the idea of you riding a motorcycle, Xander. They’re very dangerous. I’d hate to hear you were in a terrible accident.”
The genuine concern on Joyce’s face was striking, and Xander instantly noted the difference between Buffy’s mother and his own. Thus far, his parents were following the terms of their deal to a T, but refusing to do anything else, meaning Xander had yet to have a single conversation with his mother. Not that he expected to so soon, but when Joyce was this caring, Xander couldn’t help but be impatient with his own mother.
‘It might take years,’ he told himself, thinking of the limitations of the time braid. ‘But so what?’ he thought, marveling at the surge of faith within him. ‘I can wait for them to come around eventually.’
With a smile and a nod, Xander said to the beautiful and caring mother, “You’re right, Mrs. S. Bikes can be pretty dangerous, but I mainly want to use it to get to school. I have to take public transpo otherwise.”
“Well, I think that’s admirable,” Ted shared with the table. “Young men should learn how to use their hands.” Ted took a bite of his apple pie—making Xander wonder where the food went—and seemed to savor it for a moment before stating, “I’ll tell you what. It wouldn’t be wrong to say I have a decent head for mechanics. I’ll stop by and see if it’s anything I can help you with. How’s that sound?”
“That sounds great, Ted!” an excited Xander replied, hating how over-the-top his fake sincerity was. “Thanks!”
Joyce looked pleased, and Ted smiled at her. All the while Xander thought, ‘Oh, I’m going to slice you up good, you rusty, pie-eating toaster.’
In school the following day, Willow, Xander, and Buffy exited their class and were walking to the lounge area while the redhead attempted to convince Buffy to give Ted a chance. Xander pulled out his harmonica as he listened to Willow suggest that Buffy possibly had separation anxiety. She said, “The mother figure being taken away… Conflict with the father figure...”
“He’s not my father figure,” Buffy contested sharply, making Xander mildly curious about Buffy’s issues. Despite all of his looping, he didn’t know much about Mr. Summers—only that he left his family, and despite hating him for leaving, Buffy was always keen on seeing him. At their silence, Buffy realized she’d snapped and apologized. “Sorry. I admit it’s weird—seeing my mother frenching a guy is definitely a ticket to therapy-land. But it’s more than that. I’m telling you, there’s something off about this guy. He’s… too clean.”
At the sharp note from his wind instrument, Willow turned to Xander and asked, “Xander, what do you think?”
The girls looked at him as he casually confessed, “Oh, I don’t trust Ted; not one bit.” Considering the help Xander had asked for during dinner, he could understand why they were taken aback by his distrust of Ted, but explained, “I only asked him to look at my bike because I wanted to question him without your mom around.”
With widened eyes, Buffy insisted, “I so need to be there.”
An eager Willow asked, “Oh, can I come, too? I want to see your motorcycle.”
“Yeah, sure,” Xander agreed as Ted walked up to the trio.
The salesman explained updating the software in the main office’s computers and thought to give Willow the floppy disks he’d promised. The unassuming man also scheduled a half hour before they all went miniature golfing to look at Xander’s bike. Xander thanked Ted with a large grin and only dropped it once the life-like robot was gone. He then went home after school to complete his scrambler.
Willow and Buffy came by a few hours later. Due to school, forging, and motorcycle repair, Xander hadn’t had a lot of time to throw out the massive amount of junk hoarded in the house, so his house was still in a state of disorder. He hadn’t painted his home yet, and when Willow and Buffy entered his living room, they saw how empty it was except for the full, heavy-duty trash bags lined against the wall. At their surprised expressions, he quickly explained how he was in the middle of spring cleaning the entire house.
They nodded in acceptance before asking about his parents. He felt his mouth about to reply, ‘Out of Town,’ as he usually did, but it felt wrong… like something Nox might say. Instead, he answered, “They’re on a much-needed vacation.”
As the girls talked about what they would do if they had their houses all to themselves, Xander led them into the garage, and at the sight of his black, imposing bike—showcased in the center of the space—the girls were stunned into silence. Willow and Buffy gasped at the intimidating high-performance off-road scrambler, with its hefty black steel engine block. Their peeled eyes inspected every inch of the awesome bike, from the custom exhaust he had fabricated to the supercharger he’d installed, the matte-black gas tank, the custom black leather seat, and the off-roading tires, thick with ground-gripping teeth-like treading for stellar traction.
“Xander!” Willow bellowed, eyes glued to the bike. “This is… Wow! I’m speechless. This looks better than anything you special order from a dealership!”
“It looks so butch,” Buffy breathed, gawking with extreme approval. She touched the handle as she asked, “Did you really build this?”
“Sure did,” he cheerfully answered. “It’s all stuff I learned throughout my ‘Phantom Years.’ That’s what I’m calling those memories.”
“Did those phantom memories change you?” Willow asked. “I mean, it’s like experiencing an entire life, right?”
Turning to Buffy, he asked, “Lady Buffy of Buffdom, did the Duchess change you?”
Shaking her head, an amused Buffy answered, “No. It feels more like remembering a dream than an actual memory.”
“Same here,” Xander added, returning his attention to Willow. “Like, remembering beating every level of Super Mario Bros, but once the game is shut off, I’m back to me.”
“But you can still do this?” Willow asked, pointing to the imposing bike.
Xander shrugged, stating, “I mean, it only makes sense to keep doing all the cool stuff I learned in those years—or it’d be such a waste.”
“See. This is why whoever said, ‘School is Hell,’ should be shot,” Willow cutely remarked. Buffy and Xander eyed her with concern, making the redhead uneasy. She cleared her throat before justifying, “I just mean… learning is fun.”
“You have your own sort of humor,” Xander noted. “I respect it.”
Walking around the imposing motorcycle, an awestruck Buffy quipped, “I foresee a handful of girls’ numbers in your future.”
“Oh, wouldn’t that be the dream?” Xander chuckled. “What I foresee is a bunch of guys coming up to me and saying, ‘Sick bike, bro. What’s the horsepower on that thang? Can I drive it, man?’ It’ll be like being on a never-ending gondola of hell… with grandmothers,” he fearfully added, making the girls smile.
When Ted came by, Xander made sure Dreadnought was invisible and leaning against the workbench. After explaining to Ted he was in the middle of spring cleaning, he escorted the murderous machine into the garage where Buffy and Willow were waiting. Before Buffy could grill him, Xander asked if Ted could inspect the gearbox, requiring him to lower himself to get a good view of the part. When the man knelt on one knee, Xander leaned against the workbench and ‘accidentally’ let his heavy axe fall straight onto the man’s ankle, slicing right through the realistic machine’s ankle. The man screamed as he fell on his side—clutching his stump—and a stunned Willow and Buffy rushed to assist him.
Xander simply picked up the lightly sparking foot and asked, “Hey, Ted? What’s up with the robot foot? You’re not, like, the T-1000—generic white guy edition—coming from the future to kill women, are you?”
Assuming the rest of his body was also machinery was a leap for Xander to make, but fortunately, Ted was quick to aggression and gripped both Willow and Buffy’s necks. Xander immediately called the invisible Dreadnought to his hand and hastily brought his powerful battleaxe down, driving the incredibly sharp blade through the middle of its face, unleashing lightning and frying the delicate circuitry within. The malfunctioning robot let Buffy and Willow go, and the girls backed away, coughing and rubbing their necks all the while. Ted shook and spasmed a moment before powering down forever.
Snapping his fingers, Xander acted as if he suddenly recalled something important, and called out, “That’s why I didn’t like him! Ted was a robot!”
A shocked Buffy turned to Xander and asked, “You knew?!”
“No! Of course not,” Xander assured her, hating himself for lying. “How often do you suspect people of being robots in disguise…” He thought of the Saturday morning cartoon when he sang, “Heh, ‘Robots in disguise.’”
A baffled Buffy called, “Xander?”
“Right,” he said, snapping out of his reprieve. “Anyway, I was getting some bad jo͝ojo͝o vibes from him, but I couldn’t place why, exactly.”
“And you think it’s from your phantom memories?” Willow asked as she massaged her neck.
At his casual shrug and nod, Buffy asserted, “From now on, all your vibes are mandatory topics of conversation. Mandatory!” For Buffy to demand to know more about his insights made him chuckle a bit before nodding.
Fortunately, his friends accepted his explanation about Ted. The three came up with an excuse to cancel miniature golfing, and Buffy informed her mother. The Scoobies then investigated the mystery behind Ted Buchanan. Xander helped them along with lucky finds, and soon, they learned who he truly was, forcing Buffy to have a tough conversation with her mother. The Slayer explained that the man that she was in a relationship with was, in fact, a con artist, and that the police were investigating him for the disappearance of other women. Though Joyce was quite disappointed and embarrassed, Buffy was there to support her.
Xander wished he could’ve helped Joyce more, but he knew there was nothing he could do.
——
Riding into the student parking lot on his custom scrambler—revving the engine and drawing attention—Xander was the hot topic among the top cliques in school. The Who’s Who of school gossip were talking about him and his butch bike; not that their opinions held any actual worth to him. However, he couldn’t deny enjoying the attention when he removed his helmet, locked it on his bike, and walked away as if oblivious to all the staring he felt. The heightened interest in him for simply owning an eye-catching motorcycle was mildly addictive, and Xander could understand why Cordelia adored the attention she got everywhere she went.
Additionally, Xander walked with a swagger—straight back, squared shoulders—like a well-oiled machine. His every movement, from his toes to his head, felt smooth and powerful. Using the healing rate of Odin’s ring to speed through intense sets of exercises and recovery, he was inching closer and closer to that lean, yet ripped, musculature he wanted, taking weeks rather than years. Every time Xander ended up in a storage closet with Cordelia, her wandering hands noted the differences in his broader shoulders, chiseled abs, chest, and muscular back. And yet, she strangely never questioned his supernatural physical improvement. He chalked it up to Sunnydale Syndrome.
Xander and Cordelia were making out in the storage closet by the music room this time. His hands expertly caressed her body like a masterful conductor, amplifying her throbbing pleasure. As they made out, the sexy cheerleader pressed her flush body against his as if the room was cold and she needed his body heat. Wet kissing sounds filled their ears as her needy hands pulled at his shirt, trying to bring him in to satisfy her growing lust. Xander imagined Cordelia was stunned by how exceptional he was at making her feel so hot and euphoric. He had her pinned against the wall, when they finally broke away for much-needed air, but kept their foreheads pressed together.
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Staring into her alluring chocolate eyes brought a smile to his face. Xander was glad he put Buffy in the friend zone and only had thoughts to pursue Cordelia. He wasn’t certain they’d last, however. As much as he loved her, Cordelia—like Buffy and all the Slayers—seemed to have an unavoidable destiny, unlike himself and many other regular folks. Not that it mattered to Xander, because even if she was destined to become a Higher Being, he was eager to stay with her all the way to that point. A sizable portion of why he was so excited about his future was because of her.
Sadly, he couldn’t reveal as much. Xander and Cordelia had a different way of communicating; more defensive, creative, and with a lot of angst. Xander ran the tip of his nose against her jawline as he kissed her neck exactly how she loved it, making the quivering girl moan, “Oooh! Gaaawwd…”
In that precise moment, Xander could feel her brain reactivate. Her body stiffened, as if caught with her hand in the cookie jar. He could tell she was panicking about the swell of emotion he brought out in her, and when she tapped his shoulder, Xander backed away. Cordelia fanned herself with both hands before palming her blushing cheeks, making the abrasive girl look absolutely adorable to him.
Xander knew why she was suddenly conflicted. Despite the uptick in his popularity due to his motorcycle, Cordelia was still far more popular than he was, and had been since elementary. As ever, she was having a hard time justifying why the most popular girl in school felt so good with one of the school’s biggest geeks. It sucked, but he was used to it.
As Xander wanted to relieve some of her anxiety and avoid the Geek Vaccine route, he asked, “Do you want to hear the story of us?”
Cordelia reacted right away, asking, “You remember us?”
“Of course,” he casually responded, hoping that revealing this much wouldn’t lead to anyone’s death. He continued, “There’s a reason why we’re making out in a supply closet despite hating each other.”
The sexy cheerleader relaxed as she crossed her arms and smirked, citing, “This should be interesting. Let’s hear it.”
Crossing his arms as well, he explained, “In a nutshell—outside of the loves of our lives—you and I are, like, the best boyfriend and girlfriend we’ll ever have for each other. The only person who’ll top me is the one guy for you, and vice versa. The only person who’ll top you-”
“I know what vice versa means,” she interrupted, eying him as if he was a simpleton.
“Maybe you do, but you’re also a cheerleader,” he casually clapped back. “Who knows what that pretty little head of yours retains?”
“Beg like a cute little puppy, and I might tell you,” she insulted and flirted at the same time, making him snort. “So… we… as in, you and I-”
“That’s generally what we means, yeah,” he interrupted in a snarky tone, making her scrunch her nose and make a crabby face at him.
“We… dated? In the future?” she asked.
“Yup.”
With some hesitation, she nervously asked, “Then… we broke up?”
“In the end, yeah,” he glumly admitted. “It’s really sad too, cuz… you know, I rocked your world—like, you would not believe how good I was at sending you to heaven—but, in the end, we both knew it was for the best.”
Cordelia laughed heartily, deep from her gut, resting her hand on his shoulder. After several moments of laughter, the breathless girl asked, “You? Rock my world? Oh my God, as if!”
Xander snaked his arms around her waist, pulling Cordelia flush against him. A soft squeak escaped her full lips before their mouths were joined. As they passionately kissed, Xander’s hands caressed her back and sides flawlessly, stimulating her into wrapping her arms around his neck and melting in his arms. Their hot, wet tongues danced against each other as she pressed her ample mammaries against his muscular chest, exciting her in a way no man had ever done before.
When Xander abruptly pulled back—leaving her in a daze—he quipped, “Just like that.”
Realizing just how forward she’d been leaning, Cordelia quickly stepped back, turning to the side and tucking strands of her lustrous hair behind her ear. She cleared her throat and replied, “Uh, mmn, okay. Fine! When’s this ‘love’ of mine supposed to happen?”
‘Years from now in LA with Angel,’ he thought as he shook his head and answered, “Oh, not for years.”
“Okay,” she said with a nod, as if making a mental game plan. “Okay, okay.” Turning to him, she heavily asserted, “Until then, you’re my boyfriend—no, my secret boyfriend.” Looking at his Hawaiian shirt and white undershirt, and black jeans, she recoiled, as if incredibly offended. “And I need to redo your entire wardrobe.”
Looking at his always deficient style of dress, an irked Xander pointed out, “Ugh, clothes are clothes, Cor,” he protested.
With a comically hurt expression on her face, Cordelia retorted, “That is—by far—the most hurtful thing you’ve ever said to me.”
“Forget the wardrobe for a second,” he insisted. He took her hand and swayed closer to her as he asked, “How about a compromise? We can be a secret couple to everyone… except my friends.”
Rolling her eyes, she replied, “Oh, I’m sure you’d love to tell them, but no. I can’t risk my reputation being ruined because they couldn’t keep their mouths shut.”
‘Of course,’ Xander sadly thought, feeling his shoulders sag. Since his super-charged therapy session with Higher Being Cordelia, the exhausted time looper had more hope than ever before. However, to hear one of his greatest loves display the same insecurity when it came to a public relationship with him felt disheartening. Objectively, he understood it wasn’t her fault. She was simply on that specific point in her journey, but he couldn’t deny it poked his frustration.
Taking a step back, he returned, “So, you want me to lie to my friends because you care more about what strangers think of you?”
Cordelia rolled her eyes, as if annoyed by the way he was minimizing her popularity, and asked, “Do you honestly think they’d understand? I’m not even sure about… whatever this is!”
Her conflicted facial expression told him she was genuinely confused about her growing feelings for him, making him wonder if he should’ve said anything about their future selves. He had hoped they would be a couple much faster and stay together for the long haul, and though that was still possible, he suddenly wondered if he pushed her too much too fast.
Xander gently kissed her cheek, and told her, “Then take some time to wrap your head around us being a couple—a real couple.” At the door of the closet, he turned to ask, “And when you get a chance, ask yourself: if you’re really Cordelia Chase—Queen C of Sunnydale High—then what do you have to be embarrassed about?”
He then left her with her thoughts.
——
Xander was seated in Mr. Whitman’s class—next to an empty desk—when the bad eggs were handed out. He partnered with the absent Buffy and cheerfully told her about the child-caring assignment when they met in the library. This next dilemma was far easier to handle than Ted’s situation. Xander ‘accidentally’ dropped the egg as he walked toward his friends and ‘unintentionally’ stepped on it, grossing the girls out when they saw what was inside. After their disgust at the alien creature settled, the Scoobies did as they always had, and investigated the paranormal mystery.
They discovered the mother Bezoar, and, like before, Xander threw Dreadnought into the monster’s beaked mouth and electrocuted it with enough power to demolish a ten-story building. The bodily fluids within superheated, and the boiling flesh expanded so fast, the creature exploded out of the hole like a geyser, covering everyone in goo. Again, Xander was grossed out when Dreadnought returned to his hand, covered in monster ichor.
——
Come December, Xander was in his living room, seated on his couch and staring at the phone on the coffee table in front of him. It had been a week since he’d given Cordelia time to think about them as a couple, and she still hadn’t come to a clear conclusion. The lovers would still make out in closets and Xander hadn’t told his friends yet, so Cordelia was getting what she wanted. However, if she didn’t come to a decision soon, he couldn’t continue with the half-relationship.
The situation with Cordelia gave him time to think of another girl that he thought fondly of. Xander had been trying for several weeks to get ahold of the wild Boston girl with no success—which was just as well, since he wasn’t sure how to help Faith. Xander knew—far too intimately—how hard her life was, and how little she trusted anyone, let alone strangers. So many people in her life had let her down, taken advantage of her, or lied to get what they wanted from her, and Xander refused to let her see him that way. He wanted her to trust him and to lean on him when life was unfairly harsh. Xander knew how much she needed that.
On the other hand, if he didn’t lie to her about why he was contacting her, it was highly unlikely she’d listen—much less accept—a completely crazy story about magic and curses being the reason he knew so much about her. Taking the honest route, he fully expected her to laugh, call him crazy, and hang up. It was yet another challenge to his more centered way of being.
‘Fuck it,’ he told himself.
Deciding to be as upfront with her as possible, Xander dialed her home number first. It rang several times, and though he was fully expecting no one to answer, to his surprise, Faith picked up. Xander was used to it ringing or being yelled at by her annoyed parents. He was all but certain he’d waste another couple of hours calling all around Boston—and leaving messages—to find her.
For her to be back home, he thought, ‘I guess she’s not at Liz’s place anymore…’
Clearing his throat, the nervous boy asked, “Is this Faith? Faith Lehane?”
“Who wants to know?” her sexy husky voice asked.
“Xander. Harris,” he tensely answered.
“Never heard of ya,” she returned, then hung up.
Staring at the phone—hearing the mocking dial tone—Xander shook his head as he thought, ‘Of course.’ He dialed again and waited several seconds before she picked up. “Yeah, I know you don’t know me, but we need to talk.”
“That’s funny,” she replied, adding, “Cuz no, we don’t.”
Faith hung up again, and an irritated Xander lamented how much he missed lying to get his way. Still, he held firm to the belief that this was the better way and called once again. She didn’t pick up, but he let it ring for nearly a minute before she finally answered.
“What’s your damage?!” she yelled.
“Let’s make a deal,” Xander quickly offered. “You like money, right? I got some. If you want it, I can send it to you.”
The line was silent for a tense moment, and Xander held his breath so as to not jinx anything. Then she cautiously asked, “…Did Ronnie put you up to this? Cuz I ain’t getting back with that deadbeat.”
Leaning back, he felt slightly more confident. Hoping to keep her interested long enough to establish a rapport, Xander replied, “The only Ronnie I know goes to the same school I do in Sunnydale, California.”
“California?” she repeated with surprise. “You’re calling me from Cali? And what kind of name is Sunnydale? It sounds like a pastry’s asshole.”
Xander recalled her using that before and replied with another one she liked. “That or California’s raging yeast infection.”
Faith snorted at that, remarking, “Not gonna lie, that was good.”
‘Because you said it,’ Xander thought with a smile before answering her, “I aim to please.”
After a moment of silence, she asked, “So, you for real about that money?”
“Very.”
“Why?” the suspicious girl returned. “Who told you about me? Was it Steve? Kenny? Are you police or something? Cuz I ain’t talking to no cops.”
“None of the above,” he casually answered, thanking the stars she hadn’t hung up.
“You a reporter?” she further questioned. “The only comment I got about those teachers is fuck off-”
“I’m not a reporter,” he quickly interjected before she hung up. “I have a crazy story to tell you, but I get that I’m a stranger and you aren’t the trusting type.”
“The fuck…” she mumbled. “How would you know?”
“The answers to all your questions are in the story,” he baited.
After several silent seconds, Faith intolerantly stated, “You got one minute.”
Xander snickered before replying, “It’s going to take a lot longer than a minute, but here’s the rub: You listen to my story, and I’ll send you three hundred dollars.”
“...Four,” she haggled.
Thinking of the tens of thousands he’d be willing to give her for the future’s sake, Xander smiled and returned, “I’ll make it five if you make little moaning noises sometimes.”
Like a switch flipped, Faith’s husky voice sounded gentler as she replied, “For five hundred bucks, I’ll moan as much as you want, lover-boy.”
“I’ll send you half up front so you know I ain’t playing you,” he assured her. “When you get it, call me back and I can tell you stuff like, how much you love walking around Dorchester; how you always wanted a sister; how you dreamed of starting your own production company called Boston Diva; how you’re a sucker for Pudding Pops and can’t stand people who eat mint chocolate chip ice cream because you think they’re pretentious assholes trying to be edgy; and so, so many other things.”
Faith didn’t hesitate to yell, “What the actual fuck! How the hell do you-”
“All answers are in the story,” Xander interjected.
“Are you some sick stalker following me? Are you watching me right now?”
He could hear rustling through the phone, as if she was getting up and looking through her window.
Xander returned, “That’d be a hell of a trick since I live in California.” Before she could retort, he continued, “Listen, you got two-fifty on the way. If you want to hear the craziest story ever, call me back.”
After a long exhale—the seconds of which wrecked Xander’s nerves—Faith replied, “...You better not be wasting my time.”
“Wouldn’t dream of it,” he casually replied as he hopped to his feet and fist-pumped the air.
Xander quickly explained the money order process and left his home to send her the funds. The following day, they talked again, but as Xander wanted to prolong their conversation, he didn’t tell her the entire story in one sitting. In fact, he started slowly, voicing how similar they were because of their parents, their alcoholism, and how challenging it was growing up in that environment.
“But I’ve talked to my mom over the phone,” Xander said. “It didn’t devolve into a screaming match, so, you know… progress.”
“Over the phone?” Faith repeated curiously. “Are they in a clinic or something?”
When Xander explained how his parents won the lottery and left to travel the world, a stunned Faith replied, “Are you kidding me?” Before he could answer, however, it dawned on her how much money he had, and she asked, “Wait… is that why you have money to burn?”
“Sure is,” he said back.
“Shit!” she loudly cursed. “I should’ve asked for more!”
In a flirting, teasing tone, Xander asked, “Want me to pay your way through college, baby girl?”
With the same energy and tone, the sexy girl with the mildly raspy voice answered, “Mmmmnnn, you know it, Daddy. I’d do anything for an education.”
Xander burst into laughter, causing Faith to join in. Mid-laugh, he remarked, “God, that was so cringe!”
“Shut up! It wasn’t that bad!” Faith yelled in her defense. “If I was standing right in front of you, trust me, you wouldn’t be laughing.”
In truth, her husky voice did sound sexy to Xander, but he preferred to keep things light. With the hope of talking to the spunky Bostonian regularly, Xander updated his deal with Faith and promised to keep sending her three hundred and fifty dollars a month until his tale was done and she had no further questions. Faith agreed, seemingly because the more he talked, the more questions she had.
After Xander had hung up, he looked at the phone with a grand sense of accomplishment. As he talked to Faith about his life, he’d come to learn that there were only two girls that made the most sense—possibly three if Willow wasn’t on-track to discovering her sexual orientation in the future. What amazed him was that Buffy wasn’t one of them. Though he loved the Slayer dearly, and would help her wherever he could, choosing Buffy as his love above all was as messed up as Buffy’s choices in romantic partners. They were both reacting—on a chemical level—to a fundamental dysfunction within.
In the end, the two girls were, ‘Faith and Cordelia,’ he thought, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. ‘Between the two, though… Cordelia,’ he thought with a sense of peace.
Xander felt he needed to put his all into a proper relationship with Cordelia. As much as he loved Faith, he understood she likely wasn’t in the best mental and emotional headspace for a serious relationship. He could tell she had a hard time trusting those types of hopeful emotions. If he could be a trusted friend to her, that would be more than enough for him. Xander didn’t want to lose her trust again—not like he had in the last long loop—because the man he wanted to be was someone even Faith could rely on.