Swishting!
Kylie's eyes went wide.
“GOB LOOKOU--”
She launched herself off the top of his head as a razor sharp mirror-polished mithril blade slashed across the tunnel from an almost invisible slit in the wall. She hovered above where it had just slashed, hyperventilating, as Gob dabbed at a gash across the top of his scalp.
“Gob you nearly-- I nearly--” she gasped, clutching her chest
“i iz short!” he smiled, “an yoo iz kwik! dat luky!"
“Don't take another step” she breathed, “without puffing some revealing powder. And, unmute your notifications. I want to keep a close eye on things."
He unmuted his notifications, and immediately saw a
Zzt!
-1luck
"You lost a point of luck!?" said Kylie, "so that's how that works! Huh! I never knew that. I guess that's why the stat disappears from your Sphere after a while. Well, you might need the rest of them seeing how long this passage is..."
Gob took out the little bag of green powder the White Orc had given him, tipped some on his palm and blew it out as far as he could. The whole length of the passage for as far as he could blow the powder was criss crossed with rune triggers. The whole innocent looking tunnel was a long, long series of traps.
“Oh..." Kylie said, her eyes wide and her mouth hanging open incredulously, "You're going to be using up a lot of luck points unless we can come up with some sort of trap springing system... how are we going to get through all of those?!” She stared at the glowing threads of the rune triggers as the powder gently settled to the floor and they faded away into invisibility once again. The powder had hardly got a quarter of the way down the long corridor.
Gob shrugged “i iz short, an luky, and yoo iz--”
“Oh ho ho no..... oh no. Nope. No you don't. I am NOT going to just GRIND these traps--”
"iz da kwikest way! an i fink i iz luky enuf! i git tweny fyv lukys!" Gob said matter of factly as he took another step forwards.
Swishting!
Another mithril blade sliced through the tunnel, this time diagonally from the top left corner to the bottom right, disappearing into another mostly invisible slot. Gob winced as he grabbed his now half missing pointy ear. He forced a toothy grin at her and gave her a thumbs up.
-1luck
“GOB!” she yelled at him in frustration, "You do NOT have twenty five luckys! You're down to twenty two by my count, and there's like... more than that many traps down this passage!
He stepped again.
Clunk. Rasssssp. Thump-Thump-Thump.
Three holes opened in the ceiling and large metal blocks sculpted to look like powerful closed fists thumped down one after another in quick succession, from left to right across the width of the passage. Gob jumped out of the way quickly, but not quite quick enough to avoid them completely. The first fist caught him on his left shoulder, collapsing it with an audible bone snapping
Crack!
OOOOAAAARRRRRAAAARRRCHHH!
Gob yelled through clenched teeth as he fell to his knees on the floor, grimacing in pain and annoyance clutching his shoulder. His arm was hanging at an odd angle.
-1luck +1speed +1agility
"dat no fare!" he shouted up at the ceiling where the sculpted metal fists had retracted back into, "wy i git a luky if i git mi sholda brokin?"
"Uhh Gob, maybe you shouldn't question luck like that... I mean at least it was just your shoulder."
"ezy for yoo to say from dat sid of da trap." he growled.
She put her hands on her hips and raised an eyebrow at him.
"don say it--"
"I told you so." she said primly.
"ugh... yoo sed it." he sighed.
"Ha! YOU just sounded like Leőn!" she said pointing at him accusingly.
He rolled his eyes and shuffled over to the wall of the passage.
"at lees i don smel lik flowas." he said.
He propped himself up against the stone wall while he inspected the remains of his mangled shoulder.
“giv mi sec” he winced at Kylie, holding up his good arm.
“Gob, you can't keep going like this!” She said “there's still a lot of traps to go, and I'm going to make a guess that they don't get easier the further we move down this passage.”
He looked down the length of the passage, grimacing.
His face suddenly brightened,
"i haz idea! yoo iz very kwik,” he pointed to the traps, “yoo fly don to da end an set off al da traps, an i woch yoo, an den i no wer de traps iz! den i can go frew da traps wivout brakin mi bons an wivout uzin al mi lukys!”
“But Gob, these traps are faster than me, I can't even do that! And if i could do that, how are you possibly going to remember every trap well enough to get through them unscathed.”
“yes yoo can do it kylz. yoo iz da kwikest fary i eva see!"
“I'm the ONLY fairy you ‘eva see’!”
"dat troo." Gob nodded. “but i no yoo can do it kylz. i beleev yoo”
“IN you. You say ‘I believe in you’. And that was just… corny."
She screwed her face up and looked down the passage, then let out a growl of frustration,
"GRRRR... But I'm going to go for it anyway, because if I don't you're going to get battered and sliced to into a… a TROLLSLAW... But if I end up smashed or squished to a pretty little splatty smear on the wall you're going to feel SO bad.”
She took a deep breath, and glared down the passage. Then she glared at Gob again.
"YOU ARE SO INFURIATING!"
She glared down the passage again, took another deep breath...
“go on da top corna, bout dis far” he pointed about a fifth of the way in from the wall close to the ceiling “mos creetur haz no bits heer, so mibby les traps.”
“Oh thanks” she replied sarcastically. But he had made a good point. She moved to the spot he had suggested.
She glared down the passage again, took a deep breath, and...
"wate kylz!"
She blew her breath out with a frustrated huff, "WHAT NOW GOB!?"
"can i giv yoo a luky?"
Her crankiness dissipated.
"Gob, it's a really nice thought, but stats don't work like that."
"i fort yoo didn no how luky workz?"
"Well, I don't... but I know how stats work... and you can't give them to people." she said.
"but da wite ork tel me abot gervaiz an he sed HE git hiz hans derty in da dunjonz, BUT da ova wunz ov hiz levil sit in da comfy seets an git a bit ov ova peepels stats wiv contrax"
She thought about that. Then she chuckled to herself, "You know Gob for a troll, you really do think outside the box a lot... you don't miss much do you? Ok, well yes, I have heard of that, so I accept that there must be some way to do it... but it's probably high grade magic! I wouldn't know about that sort of stuff.
emergent:lateralthought
"aaaaand there it is!"
"yoo no for a fary, yoo say 'i don no' a lot"
Kylies shoulders visibly slumped.
"Ouch, Gob! You just had me all corny-ed up ready to barrel down the passageway for you... now you're just hurting my feelings!"
"don wory abot dat kylz, i woz finkin ot o de box wen we woz doing dat looooong walk from gobn town, an i woz finkin wot da wite ork sed, dat da bloo shard woz stoppin mi skillz an mi traitz an dat wy he giv me da arcane scrol..."
"Uh huh..." she said, still sulking.
"an so wen we woz doing dat loooooong walk i chek mi skilz an mi traitz a bit. coz dey werk now."
"and so..."
"an so, look!" he thought up his trait:crapstatz:
trait:crapstatz! The powers that BE want to control the powers that ARE... but the stats they call CRAPPER are the stats that will matter. Luck, fate, purpose and feeling will guide you on roads beyond the realm of possibility.[Use 1 point of luck to circumvent almost any personal disaster. Use 1 point of fate to turn the tables in almost any dire strait. Use 1 point of purpose to step past most any obstacle between you and your goal. Use 1 point of feeling to realign any SPIRITUAL divergence. Transferable.]
Kylie stared at the trait, incredulous. Gob watched her happily. He liked her surpised face. Especially when he was responsible for it. He'd been seeing a bit of it lately.
"Gob!" she breathed at last, "this is mind blowing!"
"no crap!" he said triumphantly, "dis good!"
"You're right. I mean out of everything I've learned about this place, none of this should work. But it must... I mean, I don't think the Spheraxis is ever wrong!"
"so dat wy i sed i giv yoo luky... see der... tran-sfera-bl. dat mean i can giv yoo luky!"
-1luck
"What... what was that?" she said.
"tran-sfera-bl." he said again, proudly.
Kylie closed her eyes and focused inwards, looking at her own Spheraxis.
"It worked!" she gasped, "I've got a luck stat! I'm a lucky fairy!"
She flew a loop happily, "I'm all set then, let's do this!"
She faced down the passage again, this time with supreme confidence, wiggled her wings, took another deep breath...
“GO KYLZ!”
She went.
eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!
She flew fast and straight, with her eyes clenched tight shut, squealing all the way, like a tiny, fiery-red comet plunging through the darkness, the sound of
thump-thumps!
and
whumps!
and
swishtings!
and
ker-chunks!
and
ThakThaks!
and a
hiiiiiiisssssssssssssss!
behind her until she smashed into the wall at the far end of the passage and dropped to the floor like a spent little glowing red ember bouncing out of a fireplace.
She lay on the floor unmoving and silent.
"KYLZ?!" Gob shouted down to her, his voice echoing down the length of the passage, "KYLZ IZ YOO ORITE?"
She stirred and took off, wobbling, from the ground, then with a jolt she spun around, looking back behind her, patting her body all over as she did so.
“I'M STILL IN ONE PIECE!" she waved to Gob, gasping from the strain, “I'M ALIVE! I DID IT! I DIDN'T GET SPLATTED OR CHOPPED OR SLICED OR SQUASHED! I WAS A LUCKY FAIRY!”
Gob waved back.
"YOO NO NEED DA LUKY KYLZ! YOO IZ JUZ KWIK!"
She closed her eyes for a moment, checked her stats then opened them, wide.
"YOU'RE RIGHT GOB! I DIDN'T EVEN USE MY LUCK STAT?!"
Gob put his hands on his hips.
"I TOLL YOO SO!" he yelled in his best 'primly' voice.
"NOPE. YOU DON'T GET TO SAY THAT. THAT'S ME. BUT THANKS ANYWAY. YOU BELIEVED IN ME MORE THAN I DID!"
"NO MOR 'I DON NO' OK?" he yelled back.
He felt the familiar pang and tingle of regeneration in his shoulder, as well as the familiar headache of neurogenesis. The crunched bones in his shoulder were almost regenerated. He was ready enough.
+1regeneration +1neurogenesis +1intelligence
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He closed his eyes for a moment to recollect Kylie's running of the gauntlet. He could actually see it in his mind's eye as the traps were sprung in her glowing red wake. He opened his eyes and stood up straight, ready.
"HOW ARE YOU GOING TO DO THIS?" She called to him.
emergent:visualisation
"ARE YOU SERIOUS? GOB, I DON'T KNOW--"
"NO MORE I DON NO!!" he yelled back.
Kylie squealed and covered her eyes with her hands. But she peeked through her fingers. He stepped forward, his own eyes closed too, visualising:
1. Central blade slicing up:
swishting!
He stepped quickly to the left, and only felt his sleeve ruffle from the air of the blade passing him harmlessly by.
+1memory +1visualisation +1agility +1speed
2. Three gouts of flame from right wall:
whump!whump!whump!
He dropped flat to the floor, the flames singeing his back.
OOOOAAAARRRRRAAAARRRCHHH!
He yelled in pain. Burning wasn't nice. He didn't think he'd ever been burned before...
+1memory +1visualisation +1agility +1constitution +1toughness
The White Orc had been right though... traps were good for stats!
3. Pendulum axe top left to right:
swiiiiish!
He held back to let it swing, then lunged through.
+1memory +1visualisation +1agility
4. Pendulum axe top right to left:
swiiiiish!
He skipped past.
+1memory +1visualisation +1agility
is it six nex? i don neva rememba da nex numba. ok six wil do.
6. Thumping fists. Five metal fists in an X shape plunging from ceiling, all together:
KER-THUMP!
He tried to stand in the crook of the X, however it wasn't a very big crook, and he misjudged it with his eyes still closed. One of the large thumping fists crunched his toes.
GRRRROOAAAARRRRRAAAARRRCHHH! DAT HERT!
He bellowed.
-1luck +1memory +1regeneration
7. Sliding trap door over cruel looking spikes:
rasssssssssp!
He jumped.
+1memory +1visualisation +1agility
6. Another diagonal blade, from top right:
swishting!
He didn't do much except incline his head to the right, keeping his ear whole this time.
+1memory +1visualisation +1dexterity
7. Four spears in a square shape left to right:
ThakThak!
He ducked into the space between them and paused, wobbling a little, standing one one leg and tucking his head down as far as he could between his shoulders. Nearly overshooting.
ThakThak!
-1luck +1memory +1visualisation +1dexterity
"aw com on!" he growled. Now he knew what his luck stat did he didn't want to waste them anymore.
"DO YOU NEED TO TAKE A BREAK?" Kylie called out.
"NO STOP! FINKIN!"
8. Three spears in a diagonal line from the left wall, forward floor to far ceiling:
ThakThakThak!
He leapt forward and ducked down into a crouch.
+1memory +1visualisation +1agility
9. Stone blocks clunking together into the centre from both sides:
Ker-clunk!
He feinted forward through the trigger, then jumped back, paused, then
Raaaaaaaasp...
stepped through smoothly as they retracted.
+1memory +1visualisation +1agility +1speed
Unexpectedly, a hundred tiny darts from the right suddenly shot out of the right side wall:
stikastikastickastikastikastikastickastik!
With a reflex reaction that surprised even himself, he spun to the left, about twenty of the darts peppering the stonehide of his back.
“GOB!?” Kylie shrieked.
"YEORCH!" he yelled back.
He reached over his back behind him to try and pull some of them out, dropping them to the floor, the sinister little things covered in black troll blood. He noticed a Gob shaped silhouette on the opposite wall where the darts that had missed him had buried themselves in the stonework.
“IZ OK” he held up his hand to Kylie “YOO NO SET DAT WUN OFF WEN YOO FLY PASS SO I WOZ NO ESPETTIN IT!"
He picked the last darts out awkwardly from that bit of your back you can't ever reach properly, and had a thought. He might save these for later.
+1speed +1agility +1dexterity +1regeneration +1neurogenesis +1intelligence Loot: +20dartsofsinistersurprise
He was nearly there. wow dis iz good for statz!
10. Double low blade from left, designed for the legs:
Swishting! Swishting!
He jumped.
+1memory +1visualisation +1agility +1speed
11. Double high blade from right, designed for heads:
Swishting! Swishting!
He just let it pass over. He was short.
+1memory +1visualisation
12. Three metal fists from left wall:
Crunch!
His leg gave way.
“Oh Gob!” said Kylie. He was close enough to her now that she didn't need to shout anymore.
“iz ok. i foget abot dat wun!” He pushed himself up, and gently tried to put some weight on the leg. It was the other leg from the one that had it's toes crushed already, and he stumbled forward, triggering the next trap accidentally.
He was sprayed in the face with an acid mist.
Hiiiiiiisssssssssssssssssss!
Grrroooaaaarrrrrcchh!
He yelled. He instictively shielded his face with his hands, and they sizzled and blistered from the acid as it ate away at his stonehide making little pockmark indentations. Some of the mist got into his nostrils and he gasped, and furiously rubbed them with his palms, spreading the acid across his nose and mouth.
He opened his eyes in shock to inspect his hands, and the mist blew straight into them too. He squeezed them shut again, but the acid was in there and his vision was filled with a boiling red and black pain that filled up his senses.
His mind went blank, all he could do was fall to his knees in agony. He lay down on the floor and curled up into a tight little ball, gasping and wincing.
"JUST DON'T MOVE!" he heard Kylie shout at him as if from far away. He wasn't going anywhere right now.
+1memory +1visualisation +1toughness +constitution emergent:masochism
"Masochism?" Kylie queried, "You know Gob there are a few stats in your Sphere that we might need to tidy up..."
He held up his arm from the floor as if to swat her away.
"Ok that's fair... we'll talk stats later."
It took quite some time for the acid to dissipate. It was odd, only being steps away from Kylie but not able to do anything but lie still and wait.
+1regeneration +1neurogenesis
Eventually the pain from the acid mist subsided, and Gob was just left with a lingering burning sensation and...
"kylz mi eyz don werk!" he lifted up his head and looked around in confusion. He pushed himself to his feet, and stood up carefully, holding his hands out in front of him.
"You must have been blinded by the acid Gob, eyes are sensitive, they can take some time to heal."
"i foget da las trapz kylz! i don see an i don rememba!"
He made for a pitiful sight, standing there, pockmarked and bloodied, and outstretched in the middle of a trap-ridden passageway.
"No more 'I don't know's' Gob. Remember? Of course you can do it with your eyes closed, you've had them closed the whole time anyway!"
"yes but dat difrent coz i chooz to clos dem! now i hav to clos dem i wan dem open!"
Kylie sighed. "Wait there Gob. I'm going to fly back to you to set the traps off again, then we'll walk through it together."
She took another deep breath. There had been a lot of those lately. She flew towards him as fast as she could.
whump!
gusssssssh!
thump!
swishting!
She flew up and sat on his head.
"kylz, yoo mad it!"
"Of course i did Gob. Fairies always come through when you need them. Now you're going to have to listen to me. Turn a quarter turn."
He turned to his left.
"Nope, not that way!"
He did a half turn back.
"Right..."
He stepped right.
"Why did you step right?!" she asked.
"coz yoo sed 'rite'"
"Oh, right."
He stepped right again.
"Stop it!" she said.
"yoo sed i hav lissen to yoo. so i lissen."
+1connection +literacy
"O.K." she said carefully, " and "oh... we connected more! And you got a weirdly timed literacy stat. See death traps can bring people together and help with bonds mutual respect and trust."
"is dat wot da no-tifi-ka-shun sed?" asked Gob.
"Well, no. Not exactly."
She paused thoughtfully, doing some visualisation of her own.
"O.K. The next trap is a swishy blade that comes down from the ceiling in the centre of the passage. We're on the right side of the passage now, so just take two steps forward.
He did.
swishting!
He felt the blade pass by to his left. He got an odd sensation then. He couldn't see the blade of course, but sensing it without relying on either his eyes, his memory or his visualisation have him a different sense altogether.
+1perception
"Oh wow Gob!" said Kylie, "you got a perception stat... that's a notoriously hard one to train! Well done!"
"i stil won mi eyz bak."
"Ummmm, next is a giant punchy fist. It also comes down from the ceiling, but it takes up the entire width of the passage, so I think you should jump forwards to trigger it, then jump back really fast, then do a big jump forwards while it's retracting... like you did with the crunchy walls."
He feinted forwards, jumped back,
thump!
then lunged forwards, tripped over and sprawled on the ground, setting off the next trigger in the series which was a gush of boiling oil
gussssssssssssssssssh!
He felt it passing clear over his head, and heard it splashing ineffectually against the opposite wall with a
sizzle!
"Lucky you tripped over!" said Kylie
-1luck +2perception
Gob had had enough. He stood up before Kylie could instruct him otherwise and lurched towards the end of the passage.
His whole body was suddenly engulfed in a final wall of flames that shot up from the floor. He didn't care now. He'd had enough of traps.
The smell of burned flesh and hair filled the end of the corridor as a smoking, crispy troll slumped against the wall. Kylie waited for the flames to die down then zipped over to him.
“see?” he said “we mak it”
+1toughness +1masochism