Gob, Kylie and the White Orc stared at Leőn in astonishment.
"yoo herd krunch?" asked Gob eyes wide, "how cood yoo heer?"
"Krunch?" asked Leőn "Who's Krunch?"
"da muntin trol. krunch."
"The voice I heard never said who it was. But yes, it said it was the Mountain Troll. It was the strangest experience ever. I don't know whether I was supposed to hear it, or whether it was a accident that I overheard it because I was practicing my new skill. Or coincidence."
"Or fate" said Kylie
"Ha fate! Fate is a dice roll away from insanity!" said Leőn, "The three rules of polite society: Never talk about gender, fate or politics!"
The White Orc shook his head with a wry smile, “On the subject of fate Leőn, in case Kylie hadn't mentioned it to you, Gob here is the one headed for Cragtop Bastion to challenge the Mountain Troll.”
Leőn looked at the White Orc strangely, like someone looks at someone when they're expecting a joke or a punchline. Then he looked at Gob. Then back at the White Orc.
“You've got to be kidding me. He's it? I mean I heard what the mountain troll said... but… this guy?! THIS GUY? THIS LITTLE GUY IS THE MOUNTAIN TROLL CHALLENGER!!??" he looked down at Gob.
"I mean a far as plans go, this is absolutely the most f—”
“fantastic quest you'll ever get to be a part of.” Kylie cut in on him. “Basically, you come, and you'll level your stats like you can only dream of at the moment.”
"It's not MY stats that need levelling, Kylie. I don't think we're onto a winner here."
Leőn looked at Gob witheringly. Critically.
“YOU are literally the most underpowered troll I have ever seen. And I've seen a lot. And YOU think that, all by yourself YOU are going to march through purportedly monster infested mountains to an ancient castle that maybe exists to challenge a beast who is according to unverified accounts the size of an actual mountain?”
“i git bigga.” Gob nodded, nonplussed by the Elf, "an i iz no bi miself. kylz an wite ork iz comin."
The Elf looked at Kylie enquiringly. She nodded. He looked at the White Orc. He nodded.
He returned Gob's eye contact for a moment. For the third time, Gob felt a rummaging in his mind. Not as intense as Gervais'. Not as respectful as the White Orc's. Gob felt connection. Leőn narrowed his eyes as he glared at the troll.
"Show me your stats, wonder-troll" he said.
Gob looked at Kylie, she nodded. He pulled out his parchment and unrolled it.
MUNTIN TROLL LEVEL 1
QUEST: GET TO CRAGTOP.
Time remaining: Gervais has not yet arrived at Cragtop.
XP 653
SPIRIT 167 will 18 stability>instability 9 connection 10 courage 19 determination 18 drive 25 tenacity 17 neuroticism 13 humour 5 ferocity>savageferocity 28 arcane elightenment 5
MAGIC
etherealblessing(unaligned):TOAST OF KRUNCH!
MIND 156 perception 15 memory 15 awareness 12 intelligence 25 literacy 9 introspection 10 (x5)initiative(4) 20 strategy 5 conversation 10 pun 3 negotiation 3 insistence 3 comprehension 5 skill:spelunker 7 skill:loothoarder 6 skill:darksite 8
BODY 236 heart 8 form 14 gut 12 brain 25 size 3 hunger 6 coordination 8 constitution 10 toughness 10 strength 8 dexterity 7 agility 6 speed 3 endurance 9 stamina 4 skill:run!!! 3 skill:bodifrow 6 skill:miteybitey 5 skill:tooclors 9 skill:clorclima 5 skill:multifita 4 trait:trollhide>stonehide 14 trait:regeneration 20 trait:trolclors>pigironclors 12 trait:teef 5 trait:neurogenesis 20
feeling 7 fate 22 purpose 25 luck 24 trait:crapstatz! 6 trait:sucker! 10
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"You know, you're only three hundred points away from levelling up troll... I thought it would be worse. This Sphere is a mess though." Leőn said matter of factly,
"And what are you doing with fate, luck and purpose in the twenties!?"
"i haz lotz of crapstats." said Gob.
"Ha!" laughed Leőn, "I couldn't have said it better myself! That is high though..."
He looked thoughtful.
He shook his head and raised his hands in mock surrender.
“Ok, Ok, I give up!” he said,
“They say Fate leads those who follow it, and drags those who resist! Sounds like you're going to force me to come no matter what my opinion us of our UNDERPOWERED champion and his crap stats. I'll come and help you figure out just what exactly this weirdness is all about. Maybe it'll be fun. Just promise me you won't keep ranting about fate like you used to rant about alchemy. I was so mixed up after that. Now, while you all finish your dinner, and make your unreasonably unrealistic plans, I'm going to revisit Goblin Town and see what ended up happening there."
He stood up and slipped through the door to the White Orcs cave, and was gone.
“he no like me much” said Gob
Kylie laughed “Don't worry about Leőn, he doesn’t like anyone at first, and they don't like him either. He has overinflated standards. It's a bit of an Elf thing. I think after he overheard the conversation with the ethereal voice he was expecting someone a bit—”
“bigga?” interrupted Gob
“...more advanced.” finished the White Orc. "He's also certainly NOT impressed with the distinct possibly that the most powerful being in this world is a troll. Nor that YOU might be next in line. He's just measuring you against a very very high standard... That's an 'Elf thing' too. Gob do you actually know why they call the Mountain troll 'the Mountain Troll'?"
"coz he iz big az muntin."
"Well, yes, if the stories about him are accurate, he's very big. But actually it's because he lives in the mountains, and not just any mountains: a specific mountain, as you probably know by now, Mount Cragtop. What you may not know is that Mount Cragtop is the site of what used to be the Southern-most defensive bastion of The Realm.
The Cragtop Bastion was a massive, thriving, fortress city, and the home and training grounds of incredibly advanced Warriors, Mages and Wrights. These select powerful individuals were charged with defending The Realm from the Great Southern monsters: dragons, giants, and the mightiest beasts you can imagine used to smash against those walls and battle against the best of the best. To be sent to Cragtop was to be recognised as being among the Realms elite. It was a privilege, as well as being very lucrative... you can hardly even begin to imagine how much loot a dragon can consume.
"i lik treza." murmured Gob dreamily. This story was like one of Big Trolls stories from the den, except so, so much better.
"Close to a hundred years ago, without warning, contact with Cragtop Bastion was lost. Entirely cut off, just like that. No word, no hint of what might have caused it, just nothing. No one could get to Cragtop, and no one who tried ever came back from it. It was as if The Realms best Warriors, Mages and Wrights had simply disappeared.
The Realm prepared for the worst. The ruler of the time, Queen Charlie VI mobilised the Realm's remaining powerful people to lead her armies, expecting an invasion of monstrous, bestial horrors... but it never came. Now, for several generations, no one has travelled South and nothing has come North. No Magic, no Might, no Craft has been able to cross the pass, with the exception of—"
"da muntin trol!" finished Gob.
"Maybe." said the White Orc. "We actually don't know. We don't know what happened then, and we don't know what's happened since. The Realm has been so completely cut off from everything South of the Cragtop passes. We can travel West over the ocean to the Wild Isles, North to the Bleak Peninsulas, and East through the swamps and the desolate Shadowlands to the Lizard Empire, but to the South, just nothing. Maybe there is a Mountain Troll named Krunch defending The Realm. We don't know. We may need to prepare for other possibilities though."
"possy-billy-tees?" asked Gob.
"There's a chance that this is what it seems to be. Maybe a giant troll has been sitting in the ruins of the Bastion feasting on the bones of giant beasts from the South as well as the bones of intrepid adventurers from the north, and maybe he has invited you to join him there. This could be legitimate. There's also the chance that it's not. This could be a trap. Or maybe it's something entirely different... entirely beyond what we can fathom sitting right here thinking about it. If there really IS a troll guarding The Realm from the Great Southern Lands, he certainly hasn't shown himself in the last hundred years. On the other hand, it's always been an unsolved mystery as to what happened at Cragtop and who is there now, and there are a lot of strange coincidences that have lead us to where we are right now. There are a lot of unknowns. We should prepare for everything and assume nothing. Maybe fate really will decide the rest."
"Ugh, that word again... am I destined to a cruel future of nothing but your rantings Orc?" Leőn had returned, silently slipping back in through the door behind them.
"Goblin Town?" asked the White Orc
"Goblin Town is ashes and corpses." he said.
"How could he?" whispered Kylie sadly.
"Gervais is gone," continued Leőn, "but he’s left plenty of tracking spells and guards behind him picking through the rubble for clues. I avoided them, but we need to find another exit. Is there one?"
“Of course there is Leőn, what do you take me for?' answered the Orc, "You may just have to put up with some dwarves is all.”
“Ugh…” Leőn replied, “an Elf, an Orc, a green Fairy and a Troll sneaking through the back-door of Thunderguard? I'm not sure it wouldn't be a better idea to just go fight it out with old Gervais.”
“We'll need to mind our manners with them is all.” said the White Orc, “and preferably don't let them find us sneaking through in the first place.”
“With these two?” Leőn gestured to Gob and Kylie, "They're like carrying gunpowder and a candle and hoping you don't trip over. Except they did trip over Goblin Town and now it's gone Kaboom!”
"gunpowda iz good!" said Gob happily "we orso did a kaboom in da ova dwarfee cave"
"My point exactly!" said Leőn. "No, if we have to go that way, we should split up. Orc, you know we'll move faster without them, we'll be able to bypass the traps. If you show the troll how to properly use the arcane scroll map, and with his cave skill, they'll get to the grumbler city without us. In the meantime we can get there ahead of them and make sure the way is clear past that. We DO NOT want these two to fall into their hands. It would be no different to just handing them over to Gervais."
"wot iz grumbla citee?" asked Gob
"Leőn doesn't like Dwarves" answered Kylie. "It's another Elf thing."
"an wot iz traps?"
"Oh, we'll show you!" answered Leőn.
----------------------------------------
They packed gear and set out from the Orc's cave together. The route the White Orc led them on was deep, and cramped, and long, and winding. Sometimes they crawled through tight, uneven natural caves, sometimes they walked freely through wide, ancient looking passages constructed of intricately carved stone stone, once even through a circular tunnel with fluted walls that looked as though it had been ‘burrowed’.
The White Orc lead them, but kept Gob close beside him, reading the parchment scroll map, the Orc pointing features out along the way, showing him how to use it, and developing his newly emerged skill:navigation in conjunction with his skill:spelunker, which he would only have until they were no longer underground.
“Stop.” said the Orc at last.
They had been walking down a long deserted stone passageway for what seemed like an eternity. Where the Orc had stopped was a solid looking wooden door with large iron rivets and heavy robust hinges.
"It's through here." he pointed at the door.
Instead of opening the door however, he knelt down next to Gob so their heads were at the same height and pointed at the stone surrounding the doorway.
“Can you see those small indentations in the stone there, and there?” he asked.
Gob shook his head. “i juz see roks”
“Look carefully about half way up the wall on both sides and try and make out a small patch, only about the size of your claw. It isn't a hole, just a short of indentation that doesn't quite look exactly like the natural texture of the stone blocks."
Gob looked, but he just saw rock.
“Ok, keep your eye on them, and now watch this” the orc stood and produced a pouch of dark green powder from his inventory. He took a pinch and sprinkled it on his hand, then holding his palm flat he blew the powder out in front of him. The powder puffed into the air, and an intricate threadlike pattern of fine, golden glowing shapes shimmered in front of the wooden door, a thread each emerging from the small indentations the Orc had pointed out. The threads formed suspended shapes in the space in front of the door, a circle in the air that took up almost all of the width and height of the doorway, bisected with triangles and squares, with intricately decorated lines and an angular sort of writing that filled the space inside and between the geometric patterns.
Gob stared at it in amazement.
“dey look lik de shaps on yor roonhammer.” he commented.
“You're right, these are also Runes. Different in style, but a rune is just a powerful word that channels and focuses written information into a specific function."
"Oh, kind of like computer coding!" said Kylie. No one had ever explained runes to her as simply as the White Orc just did.
They looked at her blankly. "...guess you guys don't code..." she said, "...don't worry about it. It's an earth thing."
"In this case," the Orc continued, "these Runes are the trigger to a dwarven trap room.”
“wot iz de trap for?” Gob asked, "iz dere treza in dis cave?" He looked hopeful. He hadn't seen anything in the caves so far that anyone would care about... it was boring. He'd been hoping for monsters and loot.
“This is the border of the dwarf mine. They're very territorial. They accept visitors… some visitors.” The Orc looked at Leőn and made a face, “But they like their visitors to visit through their front doors, not sneak in through back doors like this one.”
The powder that the orc had blown onto the Runes had settled to the floor, and the runic trigger was invisible again.
The White Orc handed the bag of powder to Gob “Put this in your inventory, you and Kylie will need it later.”
"wy yoo not need it?" he asked
The Orc stood up.
“Stay there” he said. He reached forwards, and pushed the door.
Click!
It opened easily, and as he passed through the invisible rune wall, Gob saw a very faint shimmer of green around him. Nothing else happened.
“I can walk through rune traps without setting them off… as long as I know they're there. Leőn can phase through them.”
Leőn suddenly appeared next to the Orc, with only a slight blur indicating he had even moved.
Kylie flew up to the top corner of the doorway.
“There's a little gap up here between the edge of the trigger and the stone, I'll just fly around it. See, being tiny has some benefits!” She flew through the gap, bypassing the trigger.
“However, Gob," said the Orc, "you are going to set it off. Most likely, nothing will happen here, but in the next few caves the Dwarves will be deciding if they want to let you into their kingdom. And you're a troll. So they don't. You're going to meet some interesting ‘sorting’ mechanisms. You're going to have to work through them one by one. It will be good training for you!”
“ezy for yoo to say from dat side of da trap” said Gob.
But to be honest, it sounded interesting. A challenge.
“Leőn and I are going to go and scout ahead and make sure we can all get through without getting into difficulties. We won't be any help here... and you'll get better stat points out of it if we aren't spoiling the surprises for you all the way along! Kylie?” he asked.
“I'll stay with Gob... for moral support.” she said. Leőn rolled his eyes.
“Fair enough.” said the Orc, “Good luck Gob.
"And look out for blades!" said Leőn with a parting wave. "Dwarves like blades, and it would be best if you keep your head on for our adventure... I've heard trolls don't regenerate very well without their heads.”
Gob narrowed his eyes and pointed a pigiron claw at the Elf "mibby i shood put a elf hed on mi clor an hold it ot in front ov mi all da way."
"Wow that got dark!" laughed Leőn, I hope you got a stat for that!"
Gob showed him the stat:
Zzt!
emergent:darkhumour
Leőn put his hand on his heart, "Oh I promise to help you level that one!"
The White Orc and Leőn set off through the room ahead of them, moving carefully but confidently. The room was a plain, almost featureless cube. A square stone floor, square walls on every side and a square ceiling. The Orc opened an identical wooden door in the opposite wall and walked through.
"He's actually hilarious..." they heard Leőn say to the White Orc as they disappeared through the door.
It shut behind them with nothing but a gentle
Click!