The leech-zombies were closing in, a multitude of lurching, decomposing bodies who had once been villagers but were now reduced to mindless victims of the large slimy parasites that hung off the side of their heads, feeding on them and controlling their bodies.

"STAND BACK EVERYONE!" yelled the White Orc as he summoned and cast his crudeblessing:acidbath. The Orc rarely used his ranged spell as it was as dangerous to friends as it was to enemies, but the situation was getting desperate now. A geyser of toxic looking green liquid sprayed out in front of him, with a

sizzzzzle, hisssssssssssss,

dissolving the zombies and the ground around them with it's powerfully aggressive acid. It had an immediate incapacitating effect against the first few rows, but the zombies behind them simply stumbled over the fallen creatures and kept coming.

The situation was well out of control, and Gob could feel the tingle around his body that signaled the end of his Toast power... he was about to shrink back to his normal size.

He pulled out his flask again, which was quite a lot more difficult to manage as it was so much smaller than his fingers in his enlarged state.

The Count had suggested if his blessing looked like it would ran out during combat, then he should be able to Toast again to extend his time, though probably in exchange for a longer recovery.

i iz sik o hedaches... he thought. But he also couldn't see them escaping this zombie horde otherwise. He thought about trying to puke up his phase brood, but he wasn't sure how effective they might be against a horde of enemies. He'd save them for later. Or if the Count's idea didn't work.

"TO KRUNCH!" he yelled, and took three more swigs.

He paused a moment. The tingling had stopped. it werks! he thought.

"IT WERKS!" he bellowed.

"GREAT TO HEAR!" Leőn called back, "GET RID OF THESE DISGUSTING ZOMBIES WILL YOU!"

Gob actually felt amazing. He couldn't be sure, but he felt like the second Toast actually made him more... he wasn't sure of the word... mor fitey? He felt a surge of battle-lust, and with an almighty and excited,

GAARRRRROOOOOOOOAAAAAAARRRRRRR!!!!!

he fell upon the horde, stchakking and kicking and stomping, even jumping and double foot stomping.

emerged:skill:kicka emerged:skill:jumpa

emerged:skill:toofootjumpstomp

He picked up a zombie in each hand and flung them back into the other zombies.

emerged:skill:throwa

He stchakked two zombies in half, and his goggly eyes boggled even wider when gold coins spilled out of their sliced open stomachs. And not just one or two gold coins... there were heaps of them, spilling and tinkling on the cobblestones.

"LOOT!"

he roared, grabbing the coins up, wildly stchakking and stomping more leech-zombies to harvest their treasure.

Loot: +20Quezatlgoldcoins +13Quezatlgoldcoins +32Quezatlgoldcoins +1ancientQuezatlartefact +19Quezatlgoldcoins

"I IZ RIIIIIIIIIIIICCCCCHHHHHHHHH!!!" he bellowed with enough force and battle-crazed intensity to even pause the advance of the mindless horde, perhaps maniacal enough even to cause the leech parasites to reconsider their advance.

But Gob wasn't observing the horde, he swung his barbtail in a mad three hundred and sixty degree circle, once, twice, again, killing zombies, sending zombies hurtling back into other zombies.

He caused so much chaos that when he finally stopped for a breath, panting, he turned to see the White Orc and Leőn standing still next to Kylie, all wide eyed, watching him with shock, awe and not a little amount of concern.

"What was that!?" asked Leőn with a quirk at the corner of his mouth.

During his rampage Gob had been holding onto the flask the whole time, having completely forgotten to put it away. He held it up in the air towards them.

"DA SECON DRINK IZ BETTA!" he boomed.

"So often true." mused Leőn.

Without another word Gob shrank back to size and immediately collapsed, passed out, in a heap.

wwwoooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

The leech-zombies were significantly reduced in numbers, and the survivors had been flung far back against the buildings on the other side of the town square, but were now getting back to their feet with low moans and stumbling forwards again.

"It's time to make a strategic withdrawal," said the White Orc running to Gob and picking him up. "Let's get out of here."

They ran out the closest gate along what looked like it had once been the main road into town.

----------------------------------------

"Wakey wakey," Gob heard Leőn say, as if from a distance, accompanied by a splash of water and a few slaps on his cheek.

Gobs head pounded. He hadn't had a headache this bad since his over-enthusiastic drinks experience in the Goblin Town tavern. He couldn't even open his eyes.

"eeeerrrrrggggggg" he said.

"Give him a bit longer. I think we're safe here for now cough tic-wheeeze" he heard Kylie relpy vaguely.

----------------------------------------

When Gob eventually awoke, and could walk again, they all resumed picking their way across the bog. They fell into a line formed of Gob in the lead, stumbling along with his head clenched in his hands, on the lookout for collapsing ground, Leőn and the White Orc behind him, while Kylie flew a little way ahead to advise the location of any purple flowers.

"It's going to take us weeks at this rate." complained Leőn, "Can't you walk faster troll?"

"don yel." winced Gob crankily, "hedache."

"That rampage of yours was something else!" Leőn laughed.

Gob turned his head to reply, when

SLURRRRP-SNAP!

he stepped on a mound and one of the giant plant maws sprung up with incredible speed and chomped down around him.

Three of the spiny teeth painfully punctured his leg which was the only part of him sticking out of the plant as it dragged him back down into the mud.

This tale has been unlawfully lifted without the author's consent. Report any appearances on Amazon.

"GOB! cough, hic-click" cried Kylie, flying in frustrated loops, watching helplessly "ORC, LEŐN DO SOMETHING! cough, tic-hock"

There was a sucking

tttthhhhhiiiiioooowwwwcccccchhhhh!

and the plant and Gob were gone back down under the mud. All that remained was the tiny little purple flower bud neither Kylie nor Gob had noticed.

"Let's give him a moment." said Leőn, "He'll work it out.

At least he should work it out..."

----------------------------------------

It was pitch dark and sticky, and stank like rotten flesh and sickly sweetness. Gob winced from the pain in his leg but couldn't move it. The thin sharp spinelike teeth pierced right through his leg and had him pinned in position. His head still ached.

i fink i iz havin a bad day today. he thought to himself.

He started to feel a tingling warmth spread across his whole body, and the sickly sweet smell grew stronger, until it was so thick it was cloying. His skin started to itch and burn at the same time. It was his natural regeneration kicking in to combat the effects of a continual stream of the burning from what ever digestive ooze the plant was currently secreting all over him. It didn't feel nice.

He struggled, slashing at whatever he could reach with his claws and kicked whatever he could kick with his free leg, but nothing changed, the plant never moved. It was a plant. Quite a robust one by the feel of it. And It was good at doing it's thing: waiting for the inevitable.

Gob remembered his tail then: it was long wasn't it? Not even a plant should like to have a tail stuck down it's throat. There must be a throat here somewhere, right? He moved his tail around the dark space. He was hurting all over now. Burning all over. This plant juice was acidic. It was literally eating him alive, right now. He flicked his tail around desperately. He couldn't find a throat hole anywhere.

mibby plants don hav froats? he thought.

wot is de overs doin up der?

----------------------------------------

Leőn was climbing a tree. He had been impatiently climbing trees on and off as they moved through the swamp to try and scout the area whenever an appropriate specimen presented itself, and when the noxious mist was suitably thin enough to make it worthwhile. He had found a pretty good one this time and was perched at the top looking for breaks in the mist, casually waiting for the troll to work the plant out.

"There's got to be a better path here somewhere" he said. He looked down at the White Orc,

"Do you think the troll's going to work the plant out?"

"Give him time," said the White Orc.

He had taken out a book called 'Observations on putrescent swamp flora and fauna' and was sitting cross-legged near where Gob had disappeared, reading it.

"It says here that all you need to do is slice across the reflexive membrane around the stem connection. It's like a muscle that holds the trap shut while the digestive juices break down the prey."

"This is GOB we're talking about! cough, cough" wheezed Kylie in distress, "Can't you do something more than just read a book about it?! hic-click"

"Can't you?" asked Leőn out of interest.

Kylie coughed and hocked and hic-clicked again, shaking her head, "I'm afraid I can't do anything at the moment... wheeze."

----------------------------------------

Gob was starting to panic. mibby dey all got eetin by plants? i got to git ot of dis plant! fink gob, fink! use in-telli-genz! use lateral-fort! use problem-solvin!

He thought about it then, experimentally clamping his own jaw shut to see how it worked. He poked his jaw muscle hard and reflexively opened his mouth. He got a mouthful of digestive liquid, which was disgusting, and made the inside of his mouth burn too, but he realised something important.

i got a way to keep mi mouf shut. so dis plant. so i juz gotta mak it open. mibby if i juz jab da rite bit…

He experimented with his tail barb until he could get it to stick out straight from underneath the wide flipper flap at the end of his tail. He almost couldn't breathe in here, the space around him was now so full of the digestive liquid. He arched his tail back like he could remember the scorpion doing, which was not so easy in the confines of the plant maw, but in his mind's eye it worked. He jabbed it forwards and down, hard. Nothing. He jabbed again. Nothing. He jabbed again and again and again--

WHHHHOCK!

The plant mouth jerked open and vomited him out onto the boggy ground then,

tttthhhhhiiiiioooowwwwcccccchhhhh!

withdrew quickly back into the mud.

+1problemsolving

Gob scrambled away from the plant urgently, slipping and flailing in the thick sticky goo that encapsulated him. He clawed at the stuff desperately, trying to pull it off in long stringy globs, shaking his arms and legs to try and free himself. He jumped in the bog and swam a few circles. The cool mud was one of the best things he had ever felt.

When he finally climbed out onto the bank and flopped down on his back, he looked like a partially digested swamp troll. He was pink raw in some patches, and in other patches a slimy mottled greeny-brown. Both of his ears were missing. He vomited up a glob of thick brown ooze, accompanied by black blood. No spiders came out.

"Gob, thank goodness!" Kylie exclaimed with a cough, flying in tight circles around him.

'iz evywun ok? i fort yoo guys must be in trubl…" he coughed again, pushing himself up into a sitting position, looking around at them.

From up in the tree, Leőn said, "Troll, you look like sentient vomit."

Gob glared back and pointed at himself,

"dis how i feel inside evy tim i look at yoo."

+1darkhumour

"Ouch!" laughed Leőn

"You worked it out then Gob, well done" said the White Orc snapping his book shut and standing up to inspect the troll.

"werk wot?"

"That all you had to do was slice it's membrane" said the Orc.

"i don know wot dat is. i juz jab it wiv dis." He waved his tail around. He stood up forgetting about the spines that had gone through his leg, and stumbled back down again.

"dat strange" he said "i shood be rejenerated by now" he looked at the wound. It had closed up a little, but a greeny-white puss weeped from the puncture holes.

"We should try and keep moving..." said the White Orc looking at Gob's leg with concern and smacking a large sucking insect with a wet

SPLAT!

"…before this place eats us alive."

Gob got to his feet more carefully and limped on.

SPLAT! SPLAT!

It was Leőn swatting bugs this time.

SPLAT!

"i fink da bugs iz gettin fatta" said Gob, killing another one.

BBbbbuuuuuUUUUUUUuuuuuuzzZZZZzzzzuuuuuUUUUUUUuuuuuuuzzzzzzZZZZZZZZzzzzzzz...

The first one he had seen had been a big bug, but nothing really to worry about. Now the bugs were about twice the size of that one. They lolled around fatly in the heavy air, buzzing with a lilting, annoying sound that Gob was never sure meant one was near his ear or further away.

They weren't particularly fast or agile, and quite easy to splat, but they had concerningly large jagged spikes sticking out the front of their faces that they didn't hesitate to jab into anything that they could jab them into. When they did jab them into Gob, they left behind a red welt that was a combination of itchy and numb. Itchy enough and numb enough to be concerning.

Soon there were some bugs as big as Kylie, which meant they were starting to get too big to be splatting, and closer to a size for attacking. Kylie flew down to Gobs shoulder and tried to shelter under his slowly regenerating ear.

Now, as well as looking out for collapsing ground underfoot, and purple flowers, they were looking around them for lazy fairy-sized blood suckers.

Gob's eyesight was designed to focus on movement, and the fat bugs kept drawing his attention, above him, to the left, to the right...

Which was why he missed the ripple in the water next to them in the bog...

Spllllaaaaaaallllsssshhhh!

An aggressive horde of mega-maggots erupted all over and around them in a writhing frenzy.

Each maggot was about the size of Gobs forearm, a fat gluggy white body with no legs, but with a bright orange ring of latching teeth set into each stumpy flat end. The latching teeth gnashed open and closed with tiny little clicks, so that the lilting buzz of the flying blood suckers was now underscored by a constant

chitta-chitta-chitta-chitta-chitta

SPLAK!

Gob stomped on one and it exploded in a milky white puddle, but there were hundreds, maybe even thousands spewing out of the bog now, having sensed fresh flesh to feed on. Before long he was latched onto on every surface of his legs, and the maggots were crawling over each other to get higher.

"GET UP A TREE GOB!" it was Leőn, who was already up one. The maggots even began milling around the base of the tree, trying to climb up it.

The White Orc had pulled out his runehammer and was sweeping it low and wide, the maggots sizzled and popped whenever it touched them, giving off an additional acrid layer to the already noxious air. With his other hand he sprayed acidbath behind him in an attempt too lessen the creatures that pursued him. His low, sweeping hammer swings carved a path in front of him through the pile towards Gob who now had maggots to his waist.

Copying the Orcs movement, Gob started to sweep low with his claws, before remembering his tail. He began to fling it around too, which didn't kill many of the crawling mass, but served to fling enough of them away that he became a bit more mobile.

"BEHIND YOU!" called the Orc, indicating the closest tree that would support both of their weights. But there was a sudden surge in the maggot heap and Gob lost his footing due to his injured leg and tumbled sideways, away from the maggot surge, into the muddy green water of the bog on the opposite side of the path.

Kylie, who had been hiding from the bugs on his shoulder this whole time, shot up out of the way before she tumbled into the water too, hovering helplessly above as Gob sank beneath.

Below the water, Gob could see a reasonable distance through the murk and was at least relieved that the maggots were dropping off him as he swam, so he continued swimming down to the bottom.

Suddenly, out of the gloom loomed a large lump, with two smaller lumps either side of it. He bumped into it with his momentum, and the two lumps snapped open to reveal two monstrous froglike eyes, that flicked around until they locked onto the cause of the disturbance.

Bllllaaaaaaarrrrrr garble gurgl glarb blerb!

Gurgled Gob in surprise, doing the fastest about turn he could manage and flapping his tail to get away as quickly as he could.

He felt the water pressure shift and a long pink tongue flashed out and latched around one of his legs. In a reflexive action he coiled his tail back, scorpion style, and plunged the barb into the tongue.

BBBLLLLLLAAAARBBBBBLLLEEEEAARRB!

There was an explosion of angry bubbles and the tongue released immediately. Gob didn't wait and didn't look back, swimming for the surface with all the speed he could.

He flew up and out of the water into mid air with his momentum, and seeing Kylie, grabbed a hold of her on the way past.

"LOOK OUT BEHIND ME!!"