Novels2Search

18. Hope

Listen. I know what you're thinking, but I'm fine mentally. There are two types of combat, the one where you think real hard about beating something much stronger than you, and the pure adrenaline fueled death choreography orchestrated by the deep recess of your brain and soul. It just kind of takes over for a while without you realizing, and just because I'm practically immortal doesn't mean I don't have some of that primal instinct left in me. Even if I could trivialize the whole fight whenever I want.

It was real fun too. I think there's a difference between fighting and violence. Between a deadly dance and a slaughter, I still think life is precious it's just, look I'm okay. Don't worry about-

Sanity : Low

Well, fuck me, I guess.

Sanity is such an annoying thing because it's a pain to measure and there's no catch-all solution to it. Turns out, mental health is quite complicated, and I have no idea how to fix any of it reliably. I can just hope the next universe will be fun enough to distract me a little until I get better.

I struggle to keep myself up using a metal rod as a cane. Moving with one leg is quite annoying, but I'll manage. Ho and the sphere is fine, not sure how it survived that last fight, but I think it went back down the ramp and only came back up when the fight was finished.

"Are you okay?" The sphere unexpectedly asks.

"Aww, you're worried about me? I'm fine! It's just a fl- a metal wound! I'll be okay!" I force a smile I know it can't see

"We are getting close."

"That we are! What will you do once we reach the top? Go back down? Explore more?"

"We both know what we'll do once we reach the top."

"Yeah..." I sigh, "Thanks for asking if I was okay."

"Asking if you are okay does not change your current state."

I don't answer, but it's right, asking doesn't really change anything. It's nothing but politeness, a social norm that serves no purpose in a dying world.

The disgusting silence is back once more, only interrupted by the occasional tap of my metal cane. I'm getting used to my missing limbs, even though I know that loss is temporary, it's nice to feel like my mistakes have some consequences sometimes.

We reach the 4th floor. It's a laboratory. I can see open circuits littered along the walls, random chemicals spread on desks, disassembled machines on the floor. And in the middle, a long snake like robot with thousands of golden mechanical hands protruding from its body is interacting with everything in its reach. Mixing random chemicals together only to throw the result away a few seconds later, reassembling machines only to rip them apart soon after.

After a while, the snake notices us.

"How did you get here? How did he not stop you?" The snake asks. "You must have sneaked past him. I told him to upgrade his sensors, but this idiot thinks being faster and stronger than everything else is all it takes."

Wait, "he"? Do robots here have a gender? I've been using "it" this entire time out of habit. Because everything has a soul, right? Rocks and robots and whatever have a soul. But I still call them "it" because they are kind of items in my mind. Sorry, it's disrespectful to call them items when they are clearly sentient, but old habits die hard, you know?

"Hey, are you a boy or a girl?" I quietly ask the sphere.

"What?"

"Forget it," I shrug. It's a little late for asking anyway.

The snake continues talking about things I do not understand. It's actually more accurate to say they are monologuing, they don't stop interacting with things around them as they talk. As if stopping for a few seconds would kill them on the spot.

"So, what are you doing?" I ask to stop the snake's incessant rambling.

"I am finding an alternate source of energy." The snake answers nonchalantly, "Quantum Reactors were never an infinite power source. We all knew that, but they believed that someone would find a solution before it became a problem. And as such, they waited for some magical figure to come down from the singularity well and solve all of their problems for them. Idiots, the lot of them."

"Did you make any progress?" the sphere asks.

The snake stops moving for a few long seconds before answering.

"Even if I were to find an alternative source of energy this instant, it would be too late."

"So why research something if-"

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"However." The snake interrupts the sphere before continuing his work. "I believe that despite being statistically improbable, the chance of finding a practical solution is not strictly impossible. This problem was not solved earlier because it was believed to be pointless, that tomorrow was guaranteed or simply doomed from the start. A silly notion, as tomorrow will always be built upon our actions, no matter how inconsequential they may seem. Perhaps the few organic beings that still inhabit this planet, such as bugs, mushroom and bacteria, might still evolve and learn from our mistakes and my research. Perhaps some cogs will wake up centuries from now and find a way to change things. I believe hope is the most logical thing to have in this situation, but that hope must be worked upon to be made real. Lest history repeat itself."

After finishing its speech, the snake slaps a button on the side of the wall and a door that leads to another ramp reveals itself.

"Now, please leave me to my research, may you find your purpose in this place." The snake says before going back to ignoring us.

A part of me doesn't want to leave that room. But the sphere is already moving towards the ramp. The top of the tower awaits.