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The Academy of Sloth
Lesson #1: Get out of my class

Lesson #1: Get out of my class

February 22nd, Year 024 Angels Descent

Daisy was very eager for her next lesson. It was a special course that was optional for her and other students but was mandatory for failing students. While this point had put off a fair few applicants, the name of the professor was what drew her in.

He was an incredibly infamous human mage who had set his name amongst the legends of the school's history only a few scant years ago. Not only was he the first human in the academy ever, but his escapades with his friends were the stuff spoken about even years after he had left. Rumours even stated he had served as an interim Gluttony whilst the Dark Lady Crozonia found one to serve in the long run.

From what her baby brother had said about him, his lessons were fun filled and intriguing. He was even dubbed Hell’s Shepherd by many of the staff for being one of the few ever actually to control that class. Making her way to the lecture hall, she found the closest seat to the professor's desk and settled in with her books at the ready.

Slowly but surely, more students began to filter in. Many she recognised as the troublemakers, the do-nothings and those whose parents probably gave generous donations to keep them here. She bit her lower lip to contain her frustration. But this was the price she had to pay to be taught by that man.

Eventually, the stream of students ended, and everyone was in their seats. The majority were messing around and laughing loudly. Again Daisy bit her lower lip, trying to contain her ire. She knew it would all be sorted when Professor Alex arrived and brought order in the way he somehow did with the kindergarten class.

The bells finally rang to indicate the lesson had begun, but Professor Alex had yet to arrive. Daisy naturally attributed countless reasons for this. Possibly his kindergarten class ran a little over. Before she could conjure some imaginary scenario, the door slammed open.

All at once, the room went silent and in staggered a man in ragged robes who looked like he was a homeless person from the lower plateau. The man limped over to the blackboard and picked up a piece of chalk, lazily writing ‘Magic Circles & Magical Defence’ before dragging himself over to his desk and collapsing into his chair.

Daisy decided that he must’ve just had a rough day with the children, which was why he looked so unpresentable. But before she could even mutter anything, he took out a flask and a gulp before returning it to his inner pocket. Daisy had to contain her revolution. Her brother had never mentioned he drank during their lessons.

“Ahem!!! Ok clash, I am your…” Daisy contained her shock as he slurred his words, only pausing to hiccup loudly. “Your new professor. You c-can call me… uh… Profeshor Alex,” he finally said with a snap of his fingers.

“Thish lesson will be two hours. This is non-negotiable.”

“TWO HOURS!!” Various voices shouted in outrage.

“Yesh… I am here to fix you a lot of failures… two hours a week will be the bare minimum I can do it with.” He had to contain a giggle at something he must’ve found funny.

“But, professor, it is the last lesson of the week. We want to go home and enjoy our weekends!!” One of the students near the back protested.

“That’s not my problem.” Alex seemed less than impressed with the class than he had when he first staggered in.

“My father will hear of this!!” Another voice of a student.

“Ooooooo, I have the willies. Be sure to tell your father you are failing this expensive school, and you want to ditch your speshial class.” Alex said, giving a dramatic shiver, to which the student visibly backed down.

“Ok, class, tell you what.” Alex reached down and took something out from below his desk. Unfurling it onto his desk itself, he revealed a large piece of parchment.

“I will make you lot a one-time offer.” he paused to sway a little. “Sign this blood contract; for the rest of your time in school, you won’t ever attend my lessons, and at the end of the year, you will get a rubber-stamped passing grade.”

The class was now awash with murmurs at this offer. Daisy, though could hear her heart pumping in her ears. She was on the verge of being irate. He was meant to be a legend, someone who had good standing. To be this blase and ignorant.

“Here, I will sign it first as the author and one of the parties,” he held a pen aloft and signed the document, then with a needle pricked his thumb rubbed some blood on it and printed his signature.

“You have five minutes. Any who don’t sign by then will be stuck with my lesson for the full two hours every Friday.”

At these words, students began to make their way down and scribble and stamp their signatures. Slowly but surely, the classroom began to empty.

“Sir, may I ask a question?” A student wearing glasses asked, standing up from his desk.

“Other than that one?”

“Yessir. When you say a passing grade?”

“I mean, like you got one mark more than failing.” Alex elaborated.

“Very well, sir, I shall remain then.” to this, Alex just nodded.

“Sir, may I also ask one?” Daisy asked, holding up her hand.

“Sure shoot.”

“Well, magic circles and magic defence are rather vague. Could you elaborate on what we will learn.” this Daisy decided would be her deciding factor whether she bothered with his lessons or not.

“I won’t; that is something those who actually take my lessons will learn.”

Daisy pursed her lips in frustration at his non-answer. But it was only now that she realised after taking out the contract that he had stopped slurring his speech. Now she began to wonder if this was a test.

Finally, the appointed time had passed, and only six students remained from the original near forty. With a nod towards the class, Alex rolled up the contract and locked it away in his desk.

“Ok, class, please sit in the row in front of my desk. We can get questions out the way as you are now my students for the foreseeable future.”

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Daisy was now more than certain it had been a test. Obeying his request, the other students who were still dotted around the room approached and sat on the row she was sitting on.

“Ok first question, first names when I point at you. First, you, Mr questions,” he pointed to the boy with the glasses who had asked a question.

“Maxwell, sir,” he replied.

“And you?”

“Bea, sir,” a small mousy girl answered.

“How about you?”

“Gunter chief,” a boy who was more muscles answered.

“What about you, missy?”

“Tasha, sir,” an elf girl replied.

“And you, good chap?”

“Kline,” was his stilted one-word answer. He was clearly terrified.

“Last by no means least, how about you miss disgusted by drinking?”

“Uh… Daisy,” Daisy replied, shocked by his observation.

“Perfect, now we all know each other. You can just call me Alex; never been a fan of all that addressing with sir/ma’am crap.” The class nodded, unsure of how to approach this anomaly before them.

“Ok, your turn,” Alex said, leaning back in his chair and gesturing to them.

“Pardon?” Bea asked.

“Ask me a question. Anything go hog wild.” Alex’s eyes lit up with a wild madness that was barely restrained. Daisy now understood what her brother meant by him being intriguing.

“Do we each get one, sir, or is it one for us as a group?” Maxwell asked.

“One each, ok, that’s your one up.” Alex shot a grin, indicating he was joking.

“Ok, I will go. Are they really getting a free passing grade?” Tasha asked, thrusting her thumb to the door the students all walked out of.

“Yes, of course, they will. I signed a blood contract saying I would. But there were parts those idiots didn’t account for,” Alex’s grin looked very malicious. The students all began to think back on what he had said about the deal he was offering. It was Gunter who answered first.

“They only get a passing grade for this year but are banned for their entire time in school?” Alex nodded at Gunter’s answer.

“Exactly, you kids avoided me giving a failing grade for every year other than this one,” Alex’s grin reminded Daisy of her brother, who had been caught mid-mischief.

“I got a question, sir. What will we be learning? As I said, it is rather vague,” Daisy asked.

“That is by design. I was given carte blanche to teach whatever subject I so desired, but nothing beyond the subject. So I made my subject so vague I could encompass so much magic that it’d boggle the mind. Like combat magic and so on.”

“C-combat magic, sir?” Kline repeated, clearly even more scared now.

“Yes, the best defence is a good offence, as they say,” Alex made little fisticuffs with his hands.

“Any other questions?” Daisy looked down the row, but the students all looked unsure.

“I got a question, Alex,” Bea said, holding up her hand. Alex nearly beamed at her, not using a respectful tone. “Do you know the Blackgates?” Daisy paused at this question. How was this related to the lesson?

“I see taking the freedom to ask any question option,” Alex nodded while grinning at Bea. “Yes, I know them. I likely met your uncle when I was adventuring. He taught me some wicked good demonmancy.”

“Thought you must be the one he spoke of. I must say the legends of the school don’t do your adventurer days justice if half of what he told me is true.”

“Anything else?” the students just shook their heads this time.

“Coolio first lesson, building up soul defence. Here catch,” Alex said, throwing a piece of chalk to each student.

“This is a test to measure your resilience to pressure that affects your soul. This can be from bloodlust or even unrestrained releasing of mana.”

“How a-are you going to test t-that, sir?” Kline asked.

“Simple, you are going to stand by the door over there and approach me while I release force enough to knock a man out. You get as close as you can and draw a line. The first person to tap my right shoulder gets this,” Alex held up a large gold coin for the class to see. At this sight, a few of the students’ eyes lit up.

“Don’t push yourselves. You pass out, you fail. Ok, get to the start and begin.” Daisy didn’t know how to respond to this. But she, along with the other students, made their way for the doorway and readied for his signal to go.

“Ready?” the group nodded. “Ok, Go!” all at once, Daisy felt like she was carrying a horse on her shoulders. Looking to her left and right, she could see the others begin to shake and go pale white.

“Come on, one foot in front of the other,” Alex encouraged as they shuffled forward slowly. But the closer they got, the worse and more crushing the pressure got. It didn’t take long before Kline and Tasha bowed out and drew a line on the ground.

A few more steps and Bea drew her line. It was now just Daisy, Gunter and Maxwell remaining. Another few steps and Gunter drew his line. Now only Daisy and Maxwell. Glancing to her side, she could see a smug grin on Maxwell’s face. Daisy decided then and there that she would make sure to, at the very least, beat him.

Another step, and the pressure was getting so much worse. But Maxwell was still right next to her. But she could now see a sheen of sweat forming on his brow.

“Remember, don’t push yourselves too much,” Alex reminded as a fresh wave of pressure rolled off him.

Another step, and Maxwell finally bowed out and drew his line. He was visibly shaking, and Daisy swore she could see a thin trail of blood coming out of his mouth. One more step, then she could win. Daisy shuffled one more step further, and everything went black.

Daisy awoke to a gentle hand tapping her cheek. Fluttering her eyes, she could see her head resting on Gunter’s lap while Bea fanned her face.

“I told you not to push it,” Alex said from just out of sight.

“What was the purpose of that test, sir?!” Tasha demanded.

“Exercise for the soul. That pressure is like making your soul do weightlifting. It’s why you shouldn’t push yourselves too much. But eventually, with enough training, you will be able to approach me with ease. I also will add that it was raw mana. If I gave off bloodlust, you’d barely make it one step.”

“And what do we gain from that, sir?” Maxwell asked.

“Worst thing to happen passing out when there's danger nearby.” Alex’s simple answer left little room for rebuttal.

“Sorry, miss Daisy, but as you passed out, you failed that test, and I will shift your line one big step behind Maxwell. Maybe in the future, don’t push your limits in pointless competition.”

Daisy had no rebuttal. She was beyond annoyed she had failed for the first time ever. But the lesson she gained was worth the loss, in her honest opinion.

“You ok to continue?” Alex asked as he crouched down to look her in the eye.

“Sir can you come a little closer,” she said with a whisper as she limply gestured, to which he complied.

“So, did anyone do this yet?” she asked as she rapped her hand against his right shoulder. At this, Alex practically beamed. “Yeah, I’m ok to continue,” she weakly smiled as he handed her the gold coin.

“Wait, sir, she didn’t pass the test and tap you on the shoulder while under pressure!” Maxwell protested.

“When did I say it had to be during the test?” Alex replied as he rose back to his feet.

“But you said-” Tasha began before Alex cut her off with a raised hand.

“I said to draw a line the furthest you can reach. I then said the first to tap my right shoulder would get a gold coin. I never said they were connected.”

“But that’s not fair!” Bea protested.

“You, of all people, should have picked up on that wording, miss Blackgate. Demons like to play with words all too much. Part of my lessons will be to get you very aware of these possible tricks,” with these words, the bell for the end of the fifth period finally rang.