Chapter 4 A False Sense of Safety.
Fear is the only thing between you and your freedom.
The only way to achieve freedom is by conquering it.
Only once you conquered fear, can you chase your dreams and desires.
Better conquer your fears early my dear dreamers.
You only live once after all.
Koshavi, the Princess of Dreams.
{26} Lokamesh (May) the 4th
I’m exhausted, I hate this smell of sweat and sex. I hate this life, I hate feeling so powerless. I glare with hatred at the small figurine of Koshavi, Goddess of Love that watches over the bed. More like the goddess of perverts… I’m so tired of putting up with this… Just a little longer, just until I can figure out how to make things explode with my mind…
Beydor, the short fat young man, gets up from the other side of the bed and slowly puts on his black robes while moving strands of curly brown hair out of his sweaty face. He is my only customer, I suspect this guy to have paid off other apprentices so they won’t give me work.
Other male apprentices refuse to admit it. After looking further into it, Cynthia, Rose’s blond friend just plainly tells me that Beydor is a son of an arch-mage, no one wants to mess with him.
Either way, as long as there is demand, I can sell myself. I need these gems, and I see no difference between “assistance job” and selling myself to Beydor. If the job is going to be demeaning anyway, might as well take the one that earns more gems when I can.
Beydor also takes over teaching me magic. He’s been in this tower for over three years and has plenty of knowledge. Sadly, he refuses to tell me how I can get promoted to an apprentice.
I don’t like him, but he’s in love with me, and that means I get to have a steady income of gems at least. We come to an agreement. We have sex two to three times, and then he teaches me about magic.
We exchange the same ten gems between us. At first, I thought this was senseless and he can just pay me five gems on the days we go three times. However, Beydor explains that everything in the tower is recorded. If we don’t make the exchange, it breaks the letter of law here, and we’ll suffer the consequences.
It’s been a month now. I’ve been working on forming my gravity mana-pool under his instructions. Beydor has a high affinity for gravity magic, and he claims that my affinity is the same.
“I looked into the cantrip you accidentally cast during your culling.” The moment I am fully dressed, Beydor touches the small icy cube that slowly melts in a tiny bowl. This ice is used to measure the time of our lesson.
Beydor opens his lesson by getting directly to the point. “It took me a while, this cantrip is barely used. It’s called ‘Lumina’s Kinetic Burst’ and like I told you it belongs to the element of gravity.”
“What does that mean?” I ask, looking into his hazel eyes.
He moves his hand in his mousy hair. “It means your highest affinity is with the element of gravity, princess. This is a dangerous spell, not the average cantrip, it can harm its user. It’s why you won’t see many people use it. It’s best if you try learning something else, you can blow up your hand or fingers if you aren’t careful. Healing a missing limb is expensive.”
“I don’t care! How do I learn that?”
He smirks and his double chin dances a little with a nod. “I figured you’d say that, princess, so I’ve copied the spell book for you. You need thirty six gems to purchase it, tell me when you have the money. It has instructions on how to cast this spell. It also requires you to form your gravity mana-pool, so keep working on that. Once you form your mana pool, you’ll be capable of exerting more control over your mana. It’s crucial to form the ten mana-pools in the human body if you ever want to become a mage.”
“Then I’ll buy it off your hands right now.” I hand over the pouch with all of my forty two gems savings, pick out the remaining six and drop them in the pocket of my robe.
If he had offered this after the lesson was over, I might've been worried about a scam. But he wouldn’t lie in these recorded tutoring sessions, the punishment for that is severe. He shouldn't lie anyway since he's blinded by his love... I'm pretty sure he'd give me the book for free if he wasn't required to sell it by some tower law... I have no time for love, I need to survive.
He is more than happy to hand me the book in exchange for the gems. This book is not bound by any chain.
“Meditation…” I sigh. “How can you actually sit for so long and just focus on moving your mana? It doesn’t move!” I say with frustration. Yesterday had been exhausting, and I don’t feel like I’m getting anywhere with this meditation technique. He already explained to me how I should maintain my breath, and what pose I should sit in. His explanation does make the mana circulation easier.
Yet the meditation itself is harsh, I have to sit in place, clear my mind, and circulate mana in my body. Normally, moving this energy within my body feels like grasping water with my hands, with the right breath and position it's like picking an oily piece of peasant soap from a wet floor, a lot of soap that keeps splitting in my hand and falling off. The intense focus is exhausting.
He smiles knowingly. “You focus on the mana, don’t you? I’ll share a little secret with you, princess. You can think about whatever you want as long as you maintain your breath the right way. In short, you can go into your fantasies. Dream about the good sex we just had, that you have all the power in the world, or whatever else suits your fancy…”
“How do you even do that? Don’t you need to focus on moving your mana?”
“No, you don’t, princess. That’s what I’m saying, just sit the right way and breathe, it’s much less efficient in terms of progress, but it’s also less exhausting. You’ll be able to meditate much longer, maybe even a whole hour. Even if it feels like you're going slow, you'll be able to open your mana-pool faster in the long run.”
Maybe even a whole hour? I've already done an hour, it's not enough! “That’s a good idea, thanks!” I flatter him and watch him inflate. I need him on my side for now, one day our roles will be reversed… one day…
“My master says that an hour of meditation each day is healthy for your soul. I suggest you keep it to an hour a day. It may be tempting to do more to grow faster, but you can lose your sanity if you persist too much.” He explains patiently.
I don’t care about my sanity… this whole place is insane. But he has a point... if I can sit for multiple hours without exhausting myself it'll become a routine that'll get me stronger faster... even if it'll be slower in the short term, I'll have to experiment. “What does the ‘Kinetic Burst’ spell actually do?” I follow with another question.
“It creates a repulsive kinetic effect. Most gravity magic work by influencing weight, making an exception to the normal gravity, or creating gravity points. Points can be either attractive or repulsive. Attractive points will pull objects toward them, while repulsive ones will push them. Lumina’s Kinetic Burst creates a strong circular repulsive point that functions a little like a mace blow. Ahhmmm, a very strong war hammer blow in all directions around your hand would be more accurate. But it’s very limited, you need to touch the point you want the blast to occur.” He shakes his head with frustration. “Like I’ve already said but you don’t listen; if you lose control over your mana you might just blow your hand off…”
“So I first need to learn how to control the mana to make sure it doesn’t happen,” I interrupt him.
“Pretty much.” He nods with a satisfied smile that reaches his slanted hazel eyes. “It’s good that you listen! I suggest you pay five hundred gems for a dream world session when you try casting that cantrip for the first few times. The cost for healing your hand would be much higher. If you want, I can suggest some simpler gravity-based cantrips to try, but it’ll cost you to buy them all.”
Whatever this dream world is, five hundred gems is way above my budget… “Like what?”
Beydor counts on his chubby fingers. “Imari’s Minor Telekinesis, Alino’s Lightbody, Alino’s Heavybody, Tukado’s Repulse, Tukado’s Lesser Shield. All of these are much safer. You can find them yourself at the library, you can also find the book I gave you too for forty gems.” He grins at me and adds, “The copy you have in your hands I copied myself. The temple takes some taxes if it’s sold through their library.”
A case of literary theft: this tale is not rightfully on Amazon; if you see it, report the violation.
Thirty six gems for a simple book he scribed? “Can I copy this book and sell it?”
“Of course! You’ll have to find someone who’ll be interested in buying though, if you sell it through the temple you’d only get half of the price. You're not allowed to give it for free, that's against the tower's law. If I were you I’d wait until you’ve graduated to an apprentice and have the chance to teach neophytes yourself, they’ll be your best customers anyway.”
Apprentices have better methods to make money, good to know!
“What’s the cost for each of the cantrips you mentioned?”
“It varies. The cheapest would be ‘Imari’s Minor Telekinesis’, it costs twenty five gems in the library. I’ll copy it for twenty one if you want me to do that next.”
I see…
Considering I just spent most of my money on this spell book, I’ll wait a few days to buy that.
I am starting to get used to living here and things are finally stable, I feel like I’m really close to forming my gravity pool…
Time to begin my training… Once I become truly powerful. Once I become a mage, I’ll be able to do whatever I want, like leaving this place and looking for my family…
When the lesson is over I hand Beydor his own ten gems pouch. This is the same money he paid me for the sex. I then leave for my room, to store my book safely.
After that’s done, I head toward the loud Temple of Tonisha. The place is packed with people who have their lunch break. I receive my meal and hurry to my table.
I stumble, and almost fall down when a metallic object hits my back. “Apologies, milady, it’s hard to see where I’m going.” The echoing voice comes from a dark walking plate armor. This weird neophyte always wears this odd armor, and I’ve never seen him without it. He doesn't even lift the helmet to eat, instead, he uses a straw to ingest soft food. I find it odd that he’s allowed to wear this armor, and not the usual white robes we’re all forced to wear.
“It’s ok,” I say as I get my bearing. He nods and goes to his corner. No one ever gets too close to him. I wonder what he looks like under that helmet, if he is even fully human, he's tall as an orc. Not that I can talk with my elven blood.
“Hey, Marisha! How was your day?” Phoebe asks me the moment I sit down. It turns out the chubby woman is one of the strongest neophytes around here in terms of magic.
“Beydor again.” I roll my eyes, as I dig into my food. I’ll admit, it’s nice having someone who cares enough to ask how my day had been. Even if I can’t tell her I got my first spell book today. She nods in understanding. She’s been doing a similar job to mine, except she has a lot more customers than I do.
“Bah, you two are lucky, I can only take clown jobs!” Sina declares with frustration. I don’t know what Phoebe said to her, but the purple haired gnome ended up joining our merry group of girls. “Me, the youngest winner of the white steam award, serving as a mere clown for a bunch of human children. The humiliation!”
“Look at the bright side, at least you don’t have to suck a cock.” Bella jokes. The brunette with the feather on her shoulder is extremely beautiful. I can’t help but compare her perfect figure to my malnourished skinny body. Her large blue eyes are something all of us here are jealous of, even if none of us will admit it. I know for a fact that she sits on a small horde of gems.
“Oi, everyone!” Adir steps into the dining hall. Behind him, two members of his gang drag in a scrawny man who looks like he had gone through a rough beating.
“This fellow… what’s his number?” Adir takes a quick look at the guy’s wrist. “0852 tried to lie to me. Remember what happens to liars!” Adir clasps the guy’s robes igniting them on fire with his magic. His goons let the guy fall to the ground.
0852 rolls on the ground in a desperate attempt to put out the flames, but the flames only intensify. His screams echo in the shocked hall as he flails around violently. At some point he stops moving, leaving a charred corpse on the ground, crackling fire, and the smell of burned flesh. A smell I’m all too familiar with by now. I wish it wasn’t so similar to a grilled pig, I’m never touching pork again!
Adir tends to pick on neophytes who have accumulated enough wealth, his gang spies on everyone and keeps tabs on how much money everyone makes. Once they have a target, they'll blackmail the poor soul into giving them everything he or she owns. Or else. I glance again at the charred body on the floor with a wince.
“Neophyte number M-0816 will report to the temple of Amaret for disciplinary action at six past midday. Failure to show up will result in an increased punishment.”
The familiar emotionless masculine voice comes from the blue walls. I don't think there's a single Neophyte who doesn't know Adir's number by now.
“Oi! Phoebe!” Adir, sits down next to the chubby woman, wrapping a long arm around her shoulders.
“What do you want?” she asks, irritated.
“I’ll need your help tonight, clear your schedule.”
To secure our groups’ safety, Phoebe became a part of Adir’s gang. She helped him rob people with her magical abilities. In exchange We—her underlings—were under his protection. If anyone wanted to do anything to us, they’d have to deal with her, and with Adir. It's a necessary evil.
“Whatever you say, boss. Now leave, you’re scaring my girls,” Phoebe replies coldly.
He chuckles, pats her back a few times, grazes his hand on her ass, and casts a disdaining look at Bella who smiles at him seductively. He then leaves to take his meal and rejoin his laughing gang.
She’s just sad… I think as I look at Bella. The only thing she has for her is her beauty, no magic, no ability to protect herself… she won’t survive here…
If things were different I might’ve ended with the same coward tag on my shoulder, or worse, dead. I have a fighting chance, and I’m going to do my best to figure out how to control my mana and magic!
Determined to get stronger I spend the rest of my day in meditation. I test Beydor’s suggestion and regulate my breaths at the right pace while drifting into my fantasies. I get lost in my world of imagination, I imagine how I’m a full mage capable of anything. I find my siblings and rescue them from slavery. I imagine how thankful they’ll be when I do. I imagine I see my father again. I even imagine I find my real mother.
*
After four long hours, I get bored with the meditation. I am, however, satisfied. I’ve never managed to sit for more than a single hour before, and the power pulsing in my forehead feels vivid. I can move it at will now. I manage to move it down my body to my wrist, and then it slips from my grasp and retracts back to my forehead. Did I finally form my pool? This feels much better…
I need more practice… and maybe one or two more meditation sessions like this one, and I can finally start working on that cantrip… I will finally have a way to defend myself!
I decide to go out and wash up before bed, I still haven’t washed out the sex I had earlier today. I leave my room and head for the baths.
As soon as I exit my room, I get flanked by a pair of Adir’s goons. They pull my wrists, preventing me from returning to my room or attaching my wrist to the door.
“What do you want with me?” I panic. "I'm under Adir's protection!"
They lift me off the ground and drag me through the blue hallway, ignoring my protest.
*~*~*
Interlude 4.1
Lezere
Lezere eyes the charred corpse on the ground. The foolish dog wandered alone in the middle of the night, he thought he’d be safe when no one else visited this place. That’s what the Chief-Adir counts on.
This foolish Dog-Korel wouldn’t die without a fight. Lezere touches the sore spot on her side. Unlike the former prey, this Dog-Korel had the ears of the spirits. The humans call them evokers. Wolves call them shamans.
This particular shaman Dog-Korel could invoke the spirits of earth and summon small pebbles out of thin air. They hurt, but not too much. A little like a group of goblins with slings. Not many goblin groups know how to use slings.
The pack is too strong to die to such a weak shaman. The Chief-Adir had built a strong pack, one that can crush any threat. This Chief-Adir is a hyena, preys on the weakest and the dead. But he is the strongest chief here, the only chief here. No one better to follow. Further yet, he speaks A'arkalu
The Chief-Adir goes through the prey’s pocket, picking the sparkling useless gems that humans like so much. The fat Bitch-Phoebe at his side holds much scrutiny in her eyes. She knows enough to follow the strong, to follow the chief. She doesn’t protest against his actions anymore.
The chief’s attention shifts to the other human female, the girl who was with Dog-Korel, the human they just killed. She’s sitting at the corpse's side, hugging herself, face full of tears. Lezere sneers. Another rabbit. Sheep. Not worthy of a name.
The chief gives his orders. “Nolan, Lezere, take the little cunt to my room.” Lezere obeys, she joins the white haired gnome-cat and drags the screaming sheep by the arm. “The rest of you…”
“You promised!” The fat bitch-Phoebe protests. “You promised me that you won’t touch those girls! That I’ll be able to take them and…”
“Ah yeah… I forgot… you’re right…” Chief-Adir stretches and cracks his neck. “Let the cunt go. Phoebe can take her under her fat wing.”
Lezere lets the sheep go with a sneer. The screams are loud, too loud, and now there’s crying. Too much noise. Fat Bitch-Phoebe kneels and hugs the crying sheep. A waste of time, sheep serve the strong or die.
“Krek nh’i a’ari.”
What a dishonorable hyena! She should expect such a cowardly action from a human! Couldn’t he face the fat bitch-Phoebe with his power? Isn’t he the strongest? Isn’t he chief? Why backstab a pack member?!
That is weak! “Al gah’ ria’ari.”
“Krek nh’i bora’a a’ari! okoa’ashesh!”
He is chief, she cannot deny his will, even if it’s such a cowardly action. “Kra’, oko.”
Fat Bitch-Phoebe raises and turns in confusion, the shouting draws her attention. Lezere throws her axe at Phoebe's chest, right where the heart is. It’d be a good kill normally, a kill Lezere would’ve been proud of. But this was done to a pack’s member, and not in an honor duel. This is cowardness.
Chief-Adir picks the screaming human girl by the arm and drags her to his room for his needs.
“Ria’arikal.”
*~*~*
A piece of lore: Mana pools have 3 stages.
Open: allow usage of the element’s mana without precise control.
Formed: allows full control over the element’s mana.
Connected: only possible to achieve after all the 10 pools are formed. More information on this one later.
*~*~*
Power level: 1st stage apprentice.
Mana pools status:
Gravity: open.
Social status: A dormant neophyte evoker.
Wealth: 6 magical gems.