Let me explain alts to you. Alts, or alternative characters, are like those extra pieces of candy you save for later. You can have lots of them. I know, 20 years on, I have two accounts and a whopping 70 alts.
My first alt was Vixen. My Rogue.
It all started with a plan between me and my friend, G. We decided that sometimes it’s best to escape the confines of leveling up with our main characters and try something new. So, one morning, while we were lounging on Skype, coffee in hand and cigarettes providing that extra touch of breakfast routine, G proposed an idea.
“Hey Lex, we should make alts and twink them out with our mains, and keep them at level 19.”
You remember, dear reader, that 19 was the golden age for Warsong Gulch, or WSG as we called it in the game.
“Well, that’s the best idea you’ve had in a while,” I replied, and G gave me his usual cheeky, non-swear word response, “Gosh Lex, really?”
So, we created Vixen and Kaine. In character, Vixen was batshit crazy—a collector of anything shiny, super funny, and incredibly innocent. G, on the other hand, was too cool for my antics. Kaine was a badass Hunter, dedicated to killing Horde and taking their honor.
We did the usual opening quests and at level 10, Kaine was set on getting a white leopard from outside Ironforge.
And thus began the epic journey from Darnassus to Ironforge.
Imagine this: Vixen and Kaine, two low-level characters, embarking on a trek across the world. We started with the classic route: Darnassus to Menethil Harbor. Along the way, Vixen’s quest to get some shiny new gear turned into a series of misadventures. Every time I thought we had a handle on things, a group of pesky ogres or a stray bear would come along and ruin our day.
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“Why did we think this was a good idea again?” I joked, as we dodged a particularly aggressive pack of ogres.
“Because it’s always a good idea to torture ourselves,” G replied, “And because we’re clearly masochists.”
Our banter was in full swing as we made our way across the Wetlands, our path filled with close calls and constant laughter. We made it to Ironforge eventually, only to find that getting the white leopard was no small feat. The journey had us fighting through hordes of enemies, dodging death, and even calling Greedie for help a few times.
“Greedie!” I shouted in chat, “Help! I’m about to be squished by a giant moss monster!”
“Again?” Greedie replied, his usual nonchalance evident. “You need to stop running headfirst into trouble.”
And there we were, me on Vixen, flailing and collecting everything shiny in sight, and Kaine, determinedly hunting down his white leopard. Vixen, ever the troublemaker, frequently called Greedie for help whenever things went awry.
The banter was non-stop as we traversed the challenging terrain, laughing all the while. We eventually succeeded in getting Kaine’s white leopard, and though we were exhausted from the journey, it was all worth it.
One day, Vixen and Greedie decided to embark on a grand adventure. Vixen was level 16, and Greedie was rapidly approaching 60. Greedie had this brilliant idea: “Hey Lex, let’s head over to Shadowfang Keep. There’s this sword called the Assassin’s Blade. It’s perfect for your rogue and will help us dominate the battlegrounds.”
So off we went, deep into Horde territory. Tarren Mill and Southshore were our playgrounds, and boy, did we stir up some trouble.
“While we’re here,” Greedie said, “let’s grab the flight path for Western Plaguelands. It’ll make things easier if you ever decide to level Vixen up to Scarlet Monastery.”
I was all in. We ventured into Western Plaguelands, feeling like true heroes. The adventure was epic, filled with thrilling encounters and narrow escapes. But our joyride was about to hit a snag.
Our guild leader and officers caught wind of our escapade and came rushing to “rescue” us, even though we were having a blast and didn’t need any help. They were particularly irked when they saw Greedie bringing Vixen—at a humble level 16—into a level 50 zone.
To get my revenge, I pulled a classic move. Our guild leader, in character, was pregnant at the time.
I decided to spice things up with a bit of in-game mischief. I innocently asked, “Hey, did you and your husband forget the band-aids for your belly buttons?”
The guild chat exploded. I could barely see the screen through my tears of laughter. Vixen wove an epic tale about people touching belly buttons and babies, turning the whole thing into a comedic saga.
The guild chat was in chaos, and the absurdity of it all made for a truly unforgettable moment. Greedie and I laughed until our sides hurt, and even though our guild leader was less than thrilled, it made for a great story.
And so, Kaine and I formed our own guild, Smokin’ Horde. but to this day, Kaine and I proudly lead Smokin’ Horde. I’m still the OG Boss (Guildmaster), and Kaine’s return to the game one day is always anticipated.
It’s amazing how these adventures, even the chaotic ones, have shaped our journey through Azeroth. From hilarious escapades with Vixen to epic battles and guild drama, the memories continue to bring a smile to my face.
To this day, those early days of altaholicing are some of my fondest memories. They remind me of the joy of new beginnings and the fun of getting into mischief with friends.