Fortunately, the Doom Clock ticked down to zero just after Lorelei dove through the gates of the Botanical Gardens. This was ‘fortunate’ as it meant that other things – rather than her accidentally causing the death of the kind man with the rusty sword who was just trying to save her - grabbed the gathered audience’s attention.
The ‘other things’ being the complete and utter bloody slaughter of everyone still outside.
It took some time for the screams and pleas for mercy to come to an end, during which Lorelei pondered on the slight hypocrisy of her Guide lambasting the human race for its blood-thirsty nature while at the same time engineering the wholesale massacre of anyone who missed a deadline by a few minutes. On more than one occasion, she had heard herself referred to as ‘the agenda Nazi’ whilst working at Glyde and Glyde. But even she had never gone so far as – check notes – manifesting demons from the netherworld of Hell to rip late-comers in half.
So, she had that going for her.
*** Help Message ***
Look, I’m not wild about how all this has worked out either, but we had to get you all separated out somehow, and this seemed like the most efficient way to minimise casualties. It’s not my fault that some people did not have enough hustle. It was called the ‘Doom Clock’. What did they think was going to happen if they didn’t get inside in time?
Lorelei watched as the last of the casualties were minimalised. “You honestly couldn’t think of a better way of splitting us up than a literal Race for Life?”
*** Wind Your Neck in Message ***
This is a fast-moving environment, muffin-top. In the normal run of things, on Day One, the newly Integrated tend to band together in order to face external threats. By which I mean the Wolves and the Kobolds. You know, the obvious ‘bad guys’ in the narrative arc that no one minds wiping out? Basically, we expect a little more ‘esprit de corps’ from the dominant species. You lot, however . . . If you want to be pissy about the establishment of tiered zones, then perhaps take it up with those whose idea of PvP is very much taking the idea of ‘punching down’ literally. This way, at least everyone left alive gets a chance to progress without some jacked-up Superman far above their level ripping them a new one.
“Look, I’m not against the concept. I just wonder if the execution needed to be quite so heavy on the –“ a decapitated head sailed over the gate to Lorelei’s right- “well, the execution.”
*** Out-Of-Office Message ***
I’m sorry. Your Guide is temporarily unable to give a shit what you think and is going for a lie-down. They are a touch wrung out after spending Day One of this Integration foiling various Planet Ending Events by you loveable scamps of homicidal maniacs. Please take this opportunity to fuck right off. Normal service will be resumed at some stage on Day Two. Proving any of you wankers are still alive.
Lorelei shrugged and took the opportunity to have a look around the amber, sub-Level 8 Zone. If this was going to be her temporary home, it would be best to become familiar with it. Just behind her were a couple of massive - now very locked - wrought-iron gates separating those inside from the ongoing carnage —just because everyone out there was dead didn’t mean the monsters feasting wasn’t an ongoing visual and aural treat—bore intricate floral designs. Interestingly, these were both animate and behaving more than slightly coquettishly towards the people they were protecting. To be frank, the flowers were giving it quite a lot of "Come on in, the flora's lovely," as if they were advertising their wares in some sort of weird Red Light district. But for flowers.
Lorelei was not quite sure what to make of that.
She assumed that the System had seen Disney’s ‘Alice in Wonderland’ and thought anxious people would be soothed by some sexy plants giving it the ‘come on’. She would be happy to confirm on any feedback form that this was another example of whoever was in charge misjudging the situation. Flanking the rather erotically charged floral gates were some reassuringly stout brick pillars that might have been lifted from an architectural sketchbook labelled "Classic, but Make It Fancy," which were connected to a pleasingly robust eight-foot tall brick wall that boxed the Botanical Garden in. So far, none of the monsters outside had made much of an attempt to climb it.
A man in a loincloth – but not really the body to pull it off – saw her looking and decided to sealion his way into her thought process. “Don’t worry, they won’t be able to get over that. It’s far too high.”
This narrative has been purloined without the author's approval. Report any appearances on Amazon.
While grateful to, once more, be bathed in the aura of utter confidence of a middle-aged white man, Lorelei did feel within her rights to have a follow-up question. “How about the ones that can fly?”
The man frowned for a moment, but then his testosterone kicked back in, and he shrugged, dismissing the silly girl's unnecessary technicality about things beyond her understanding. “No worries. If any of them try that, we’ll kill them. Trust me, you’ll be perfectly safe in here.”
Knowing that all that was necessary from her in this conversation was to be an impressed, cooing decorative object, Lorelei smiled, simpered and made her excuse to leave as soon as possible.
Walking away from Brian – a Level 6 Mountain Barbarian who was very much not compensating for anything with the giant broadsword he insisted she touched - she found herself walking on a lawn so meticulously kept it was pretty damn smug about it. Flower beds burst with seasonal colours – as in colours from all the seasons. Again, the System seemed to have understood the concept of flowers but not necessarily how they worked – strutted their petals with the confidence usually reserved for runway models. Or Mountain Barbarians. The air was thick with the combined fragrance of roses and jasmine, potent enough to give even the most stoic of noses a moment of blissful surrender. Mind you, anything that masked the smell of blood and gore from outside would get Lorelei’s vote any day.
Just to the left of all the greenery, Lorelei could see a stone path meandering through a grove of trees which waved happily at her. Considering how flirty the flowers on the gate were, she did not think she’d be taking a stroll in those deep, dark woods in the near future. She had her virtue to think about, after all. Moving on from the potentially rapey ferns, to Lorelei’s right, was a shimmering mass of glass and white steel which looked rather like a giant, posh terrarium. Which was precisely what it was.
Its dome rose to the sky, towering above the trees. Lorelei could remember coming here on a school visit and knew that around this central hothouse were a number of other ‘themed’ spaces. For example, a Japanese garden, complete with a traditional wooden bridge and stone lanterns, exuding an air of calm that might help her pretend the Integration had never happened. And nearby would be a massive herb garden that was a riot of thyme, rosemary, and lavender, offering an experience which – if all the sexualised plants were a consistent theme - could only be described as "herbalicious."
Strategically placed along the paths leading through the gardens were benches made of dark teak wood, inviting the survivors of the carnage to sit and reflect on how Day One had gone. Or, more likely, have a bit of a cry. The gentle sound of water trickling from hidden fountains made it clear more than a few people were availing themselves of that second opportunity.
Looking around, from what Lorelei could tell, there were a good few hundred people with her inside this Amber Zone, which was both good and terrible at the same time. ‘Good’ that a decent number of people had managed to survive the devastation of the journey here, but ‘terrible’ that there were not many more. Even assuming that there were lots of other Green, Amber and Red Zones across the world, it seemed to her that the System had really screwed the pooch in thinning human numbers out.
As if in response to her thought – which was becoming a regular enough thing that she would need to be a bit more careful with her idle wondering – her attention was grabbed by an *** End of Day One Message ***, which began ticker taping across her vision.
By the way everyone around her paused, it was clear they had all received the same contact.
Greetings, Esteemed Citizens of Earth (Planetary Recognition Code pending),
We hope you have enjoyed your early experiences of your Integration into our cosmos of boundless opportunities.
As Day One draws to a close, please take the opportunity to review your Class. Should you have questions, a Build Consultant will be happy to meet with you to discuss the Strengths and Weaknesses of your current position. Speak to your nearest Merchant to get access to this resource. Please remember that the path of growth is both wondrous and challenging. It is through embracing your chosen path with dedication and fervour that you will be able to achieve all you desire.
In this vein, could we please remind you that our vast and vibrant System encourages you to cultivate your abilities in harmony and peace? Whilst we appreciate the desire to advance quickly through the Levels, there have been a number of incidents on Day One whereby the strong have taken from the weak rather than seeking to support them in their development.
Thus, to preserve the spirit of collaboration through which our System operates, you have all now been moved to zones of an appropriate Level tier. Please do not seek to victimise those who have been gathered into a lower tier. You should seek to forge alliances and build friendships with those who can add value to the world, not kill those who are on a slower journey than yourselves.
New quests will roll out at midday of Day Two, which will, in an ability-appropriate way, give you the opportunity to level up. Again, please do not seek to enter zones beneath your tier in this interim period. There are far more honourable ways to gain XP.
So, sleep well, brave citizens of Earth.
May your dreams be filled with enlightenment, and may your path lead you to the pinnacle of your potential. And, please, one final time, we ask you not to take advantage of those unable to fairly fight back against you. Your destiny is forged in the stars, and you will wish to greet the heavens with a clear conscience.
With Cosmic Regards,
[Your Regional System Administrator - Milky Way Branch]
“For fuck’s sake,” Lorelei muttered to no one in particular.
“What’s wrong? I thought it was a nice message.” A short, dumpy woman who had long ago decided that black was flattering and was going to lean in frowned at her.
“Sure, if you ignored the bit where it painted a giant, flashing ‘hit me’ sign on this zone’s back.”
“Don’t be silly. It told everyone not to attack lower-tier zones. We’ll be fine in here.”
“Yes. And if we’ve learned anything today, it’s that everyone is doing exactly what they are told. If there was anyone above Level 8 out there that hadn’t considered coming here and slaughtering us all for the XP, that message has certainly put it in their minds.”
The woman in black moved away from Lorelei, clearly deciding they were not going to be gal pals. Which was absolutely fine. Because Lorelei knew exactly what was going to happen next.
And she wanted to get ready.