The evening wind blew in through the broken inn window. I watched Stehy stare at the envelope with ominous writing. Stehy sniffed the writing on the envelope, then went to the inn door, opening it and checking outside before standing near the trail of blood. I noticed through the small gap of the door that the blood trail outside the room I saw this morning was gone. Stehy crouched down to the dried blood on the inside of the room, mimicking a hound.

「Niji did it。」

"Did what?"

「From what I saw of your memories, the situation has worsened。Your response was hasty。Had you stayed in the inn room and told Hohemi to leave, this wouldn't have happened。」

"What is this, a lecture loli?" I sighed. Mostly acting for her benefit. It's a bad habit. "How could I have known? Yarko and Niji are strangers. I got frustrated, I didn't know what either of them were going to do. I protected myself."

And Stehy waved the bloodied envelope back and forth like a fan.

「From what? Politeness bridges the gap。Would a naked, sleeping girl attack you? And now, look at all this。You've unleashed the incarnations of evil and chaos。」

She'd better be joking.

"How was I supposed to know?" I complained. "I had memory loss and my feelings were all over the place, there's no way I could have known beforehand that this would 'awaken' Niji, or whatever Yarko said."

「No。Niji woke up, at some point, but there was no 'awakening'。Your wording suggests she is an ancient evil who was asleep, it's more likely she got scared when she saw both Yarko and Hohemi naked。」

Oh, that makes sense. I think. I took my blazer off of Hohemi's sleeping body, so she was naked. I sent in Yarko to retrieve my left loafer, Niji, which I left behind in the inn. Yarko must have ignored my order, like I thought she would, to go buy clothes first. Yarko walked in on a loafer and a naked Hohemi. I traced the bottom of my skirt, testing the cloth between my fingers. Even though I gave her all that money! Disrespectful.

And then, naked Yarko enters the room with naked Hohemi, and Niji is there. Niji goes bankai. Or something. Then, trail of blood. The trail of blood in the hallway of the inn showed signs on Imouto, Stehy said. That could only mean she cleaned up the blood trail in the hallway.

Imouto didn't even wake me up even though there was a blood trail outside my door? How respectful to her guests. Or, is it common for her? Is this normal in the inns of Errera? Nephilz at least. Maybe. What Ouji said about Hohemi's nefarious activity gave me a low opinion of the residents of Nephilz.

I walked over to the door and budged it open, checking the hallway to make sure. No blood trail outside. Looking down, I saw the blood trail inside my room, leading to my bed.

"Who's blood is this, then?"

「The same as on the note。It smells of leather。I can only assume a fellow loafer loli would have blood smelling of leather。」

What a completely useless feature. Well, they are magical clothing summons, and magic is chaotic in Errera, so, I was asking for a result like this. That said, blood smelling like leather feels appropriate. It's Niji's blood. So, it isn't Yarko or Hohemi's blood.

"What happened?"

Stehy shook her head in response. Opening the note, she read the contents out loud.

「"The elder seal of the ancient one beckons。" That all she said。」

How uselessly ominous. Niji might as well have written "maybe something bad." Ah, that's enough of that.

"Let's leave them to it, then."

I, after awakening after a long sleep, went back to bed. Or tried. Stehy caught my arm as I sought refuge.

「There is a matter of responsibility to be attended to。」

"I didn't sign a contract, so I'm not legally obligated."

「Morally, you are obligated。」

"Morals are just fashion! They change all the time!"

「You are the one who said you would take over Nephilz and eradicate their unsavory culture。You told me to plan take over Nephilz。」

"Okay, yeah, but that feels like forever ago. I can't even remember what happened last night. This is too exhausting. I'm done."

「Do you really think that this is the time to be lazying around? Yarko and Niji are gone。Niji was either injured by Yarko or injured herself。There is the question of why she would write this note in her blood as well。」

And my hand went to my head.

"Yeah, yeah, those are nice questions. Tell me, in detail, what happened after I met Elu, and then I'm going back to sleep."

Stehy released my arm.

「Who is Elu?」

Oh. I turned to the confused loli. I understand the disconnect now.

"You don't remember the moon elf?"

「What's a moon elf?」

"You can see my memories, right? Go look. It's there." I gestured toward my right foot. I'm assuming that's how she 'links in' or whatever. She's always doing it, so there must be some significance.

「There was no 'moon elf'。It is within your wild imagination to create such a lie, but the Wizard I know would never lie。 This is yet another mystery。」

Oh great. I could use more of those. Is there a counter, somewhere? Maybe I should have Anime Girl count them as they stack up, I bet by tomorrow I'll have eight million of them.

"See. It's getting even more confusing. I remember what I read on the internet! 'Don't choose to be confused about what's not confusing!'"

Stehy crossed her hands around herself, resting her hands in her big brown sleeves.

「Our situation is, clearly, confusing。」

"Yes. Which is why, I'm calling it. I'm going to bed. Forget about telling me about yesterday, it'll probably lead to the awakening of the Demon King or something. I'm sure it can wait." I'm getting worried it can't, now. I ruffled my hair with both hands. At least I'm still an Anime Girl. There is solace in that knowledge. "Whatever it is, it can wait. No! It's going to wait! Demon King or no, it's waiting! All mysteries are on a wait timer, starting now!"

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* * *

The wait timer was a good idea, or so I thought at the time. I thought, hey, maybe if I get some distance from all the puzzles and memory loss, I'd come up with a way to get through all this nonsense. Niji and Yarko are out there, they know where I am, maybe they'll come back, maybe not. Maybe I'm better off just treating them like a cat who ran away one day.

It's not like we were close either. And all Stehy has done is nag me. Anime Girl doesn't say much I can understand, but, she's young, so, expecting more from her is wrong.

So when I found myself walking through a swamp with barren trees under a grey sky, I almost had a fit.

I'm not exactly angry. Not frustrated, I'm not lacking in sleep. I feel like there's nothing I can do. I'm trapped.

As I kept walking through the swamp, the mud squishing under my feet, the wind caressed my naked butt. Again. I am naked and alone again.

"This never ends." Grumbling to myself, I grabbed my head. This is a dream, right? Yeah, it has to be. That or some magical attack that traps you inside your mind. I'm sure. Why not an attack while I'm in bed? Why not?

Who even knows who I am? Oh, wait. Kirei said not to register at the Adventurer's Guild. I did that. Now, everyone who's a problem might know. Great. Ignorance will kill you. In my case, trap me in my dream.

Walking through the trees, I saw a small black lake peek out, near a lanky figure in a black robe with a despondent face.

Yeah, it makes sense. It's Kirei. Finally, I understood something. When I met Kirei he talked about how he had some link to me where he would know wherever I was. Kirei must be using it to talk to me in this dream. The swamp here reminds me of him, maybe it's his mind? Is this a dream telephone spell? Is that how it works?

"Anime Girl, you there?" I whispered. Staring at Kirei by the lake, I wanted backup. It's a dream. This is a dream. Because if it's not, then I'm mad. I suppose the moon elves could have abducted me, but, let's stick with what I know.

I remembered as I approached him what Hohemi showed me in Kirei's Tome. Kirei, Mage of Mysteries. I wonder what that means? I have too many mysteries right now, anyways.

The somber tall bastard said nothing as I came near him. Not a word. As if he was waiting for me to break the silence. Never once in my last life did I do an 'icebreaker', where you talk to someone on purpose, but right now, I did it.

"This a dream?" I asked. My voice came out in a nicer tone than I imagined.

"This is your dream, Wizard. I see you registered with the Adventurer's Guild. The events of late in Nephilz have been most interesting." Kirei stared off over the lake, looking into the distance.

Now that I think about it, it's kind of annoying to not have people look at you when you're looking at them. I was never great at eye contact as a kid, but when I grew up I stopped considering it a problem. It became 'something I did,' and now I'm mad that Kirei isn't looking at me.

"Care to tell me? I've had some memory loss."

"Did you lose the tournament?"

The world's strongest thing. Guess Kirei heard about it. That feels so long ago. Maybe because for me, I was able to beg my way out of it from the resident moon elf.

"I complained to Elu about it and she disqualified me before I entered."

Kirei nodded. "I see. You talked to a moon elf? Interesting. Why are the sewers in an uproar? When I came to visit you in your dream, I expected to hear you were the world's strongest now. The Homuculi below have a new No Life King. I thought that might be you."

"There's a No Life King?"

Kirei reached out his arm, turning a palm up.

"Below in the sewers of Nephilz, a No Life King reigns over the errant Homunculi created by mages. The old No Life King has fallen, and now, the Homunculi are rising from the sewers to attack the citizens of Nephilz..."

How ominous. And I was worried about Yarko being naked. And Hohemi. And being confused. When did that happen?

Kirei prattled on.

"Negi, one of my strongest apprentices, was sent down to scout. There is a little girl—"

"Loli!" I corrected. It's Niji, Niji confirmed, but! I can't allow him to violate the barrier between little girl and loli! There is a sacred convenant that exists that divides them! Morals may change with time, but they must be upheld by men! Or in my case, an Anime Girl!

"What is this, 'loli'? A language from the world your soul came from?"

"I created the loli. She just happens to appear to you as a little girl. She's—" I'll leave out the clothing summons part. I don't want to confuse Kirei, I'm already lost myself. "She was acting strange lately. I'll go get her. It's no problem. I was looking for her." Was I? "Thanks." Why did I thank him?

Kirei shifted his weight. Towering over me, he assessed me and sniffed the air. Looking down on me, are you?

"We call them little girls here."

"In the language of my people, the term is 'loli.' I made her from magic, so what I say goes."

Kirei looked displeased. He always does, but he looked even more displeased.

"Well. You said you talked to Elu, the moon elf. That is impossible. How were you able to approach her? She's under surveillance from the Moon City, getting too close should have knocked you out. And, I'm surprised you're still alive. The moon elves usually send assassins to whoever approaches their ambassadors on Errera."

I do not like the sound of moon elf assassins. I already had Hohemi in my bed. Wait, maybe she was the assassin! No, the spy! Hohemi is a moon elf spy! It must be true! I heard from Ouji that his evil sister Cheru hangs out with Elu, and Cheru hired assassins to kill Ouji. Ouji also said he got almost-killed by Hohemi three times, so, yeah. Hohemi is either Cheru's assassin, a moon elf assassin, a moon elf spy, or all three. I was suspicious of her anyways, but this raises the bar even more!

"Elu had a cold aura. It wasn't that big of a deal." I hand waved it. I just used that Uiharu spell, no one cares about Uiharu.

Kirei's glare was like a dead fish.

"I have traveled this world for centuries and not a single time have I heard of a being besides the Valahir get close to a moon elf. You are a mere Homunculi, moreover, one of my creation. You should be incredibly weak to the point that a passing wind would topple you."

I clearly remember some cthuluish things in those magic eggs back in that cave, they didn't look weak at all! Why is he down talking his own creations? Did he make them weak on purpose? This guy? The "Grow 20x Hitler in 7 days or your money back" guy?

"I am an Anime Girl."

Kirei looked at me for a second as I said it, then turned away.

"I see. So the reason your mana is so great is because of your soul. Tell me, before you were born in a magic egg, who were you? An angel? A god? Perhaps, some great spiritual being?"

"A virgin who sat on inside on his computer all day watching anime."

"Incomprehensible." Kirei said.

I told him the details. It's my dream, and I felt like it. I don't like this guy, but it's a dream so it doesn't count. When I wake up, I'll go to the sewers and say hi to Niji.

"So," Kirei jumped in as I explained. "You were someone who didn't understand the world at all, thought yourself powerless, and spent all their time seeking the answer to mysteries using your magic?"

"Yep." Sure. Close enough.

"We're not so different after all." Kirei said.

"Why do I feel like I've heard that before?"

"How would I know why you have feelings?"

"Good point." I admitted.

The wind blew between us. I realized, even though this is a dream, I am still naked. And I've been talking to this guy while naked. As the awareness hit, I said [Ecchi] out loud under my breath. There was no urge to hit him from Anime Girl Physics. I suppose that right is reserved for the Ouji's of the world, not for someone Anime Girl ran at saying [Oto-san!]

Kirei broke the silence.

"The offer to my apprentice will never expire. Even though you may never choose to learn from me, know that I am proud of you as my greatest creation. It was worth it, if only to see a moon elf approached. I look forward to what novelty you will bring to Errera."

"Yeah yeah. Take care." I grumbled. Next time I dream, I'm dreaming up some clothes.

My body shook. The world around me distorted. Blackness enveloped me as my sense of self timed out, then I opened my eyes. The light from the moon filled the inn, shining down on a twisted mass of grey hair in front of me. Her face coming closer, I knew it was Yarko. Looking down to check, I saw Stehy in loafer form on my right foot. That's rare of her.

「Danna。There something to report。We've subjugated the sewers。」

Why does Yarko look so proud of herself?