It was all a dream. I think? That would be awful right, if it were true. I do joke about Ouji dying, but it's still murder even if it's Ouji. However, I can't confirm he is still among the living. My mind ran wild with imagination about the past. I couldn't recall a single thing. Not one.

I'm in my room at the Laughing Dragon. Stehy is firmly attached to my right foot. My left loafer is in a corner. Ouji is not present— I was worrying about the possibility of something between the golden beetle and I 'happening' because my memory of the last day is muddled. My head is trapped in softness and warmth

Confusion is a natural state. It begets curiosity. Curiosity is the key to happiness. If a puzzle is too easy, it will be solved by anyone. Kids toys. Fisher Price. If a puzzle is too hard, well, you found a university and lots people talk about it for hundreds of years.

Earth's technology advanced at an alarming pace when I left. From what I read on the internet, there was whole sectors of technology I didn't even know existed. Earth was a big world, condensed and relayed to me via the internet. And, if I didn't know something, I could just google it.

I'd find something, even if it wasn't any help, or I never solved the puzzle I was worrying about at the time, I got another lead. Another website to bookmark, feeling satisfied. The 'feeling' of learning lead me onwards—

And of course, that continued until I died. Learning is hope. Learning is the way forward. Without memories, we don't have anything to be upset about, but there's not much to be happy about either. Except being alive, that is, if you're happy with survival, you don't need memories!

And, curiosity is the key to happiness. I could be happy being curious. But, I'm not happy only being curious. Because, I desire the answer to know what happened yesterday—

I want to come to understand why Yarko is entirely naked in bed beside me.

My head is sandwiched, enmeshed between her breasts and I am happy about this. Tell me your secrets, Breasts.

It's a cliche. Waking up and not knowing what happened, with people in bed with you. Do clothing summons count? Can I call these 'girls?' I absolutely refuse to call Stehy a girl though, a loli is a loli, it's a psychological safety guard every anime watcher needs.

Well, at least, I never thought it would, or could happen to me, sharing my bed. Me especially, a Wizard, whose social skills were zero, whose interest in interacting with others in real life was approaching the radix point— might have become something else entirely.

I'm talking about getting drunk. I did drink in my last life, but I always thought it was stupid and didn't see the appeal. Now, food! That was my vice.

Then, we get to the sex that I wasn't having ever. Really, honestly, I was more disappointed I wasn't solving 'the puzzle of sex.' I don't think someone who is not an autist would understand, but for me, sex wasn't something I 'had to do' or 'needed to do.' I was used to being alone. I enjoyed being alone. Being with others, going to school everyday, those were the hard parts of my autist life.

Being alone is easy. But, maybe it's too easy. Why else would I venture out from Heaven(Pillow Rat Tree)? I have fallen. I am a fallen angel.

My eye snapped to a darkness emerging out of the corner of my eye. My left loafer levitated. This is normal in this world. For me, anyways. Around my left loafer, a black flame burned speckled with flashes of grey. Then, the left loafer dropped.

Why'd that happen? I woke up, and then— I thought 'I am a fallen angel.' Then, I saw my left loafer float.

Mysteries aren't unsolvable. Hohemi showed me in Kirei's Tome his signature— Kirei, Mage of Mysteries. Kirei's foreboding dialogue rambled in my mind, sickening me, and I nuzzled my head against Yarko's bosom. I am a fallen angel.

I was watching this time. My left loafer floated. Then, after a second, it plopped onto the wooden floor with a clack.

There is a hidden logic to this world. To all worlds. My hand reached towards Yarko's breast, and I, with trepidation, laid my hand upon her right one. I levered it, extricated my head, and sat up. I crossed my legs, dragging a sleeping Stehy across my bedsheets. I closed my eyes, breathing in, I counted to four. I held for a count of one. Then, I exhaled for a count of four.

I could go into the neuroscience behind mindfulness and why the last six years of research overturns unfounded cultural assumptions of the mind and affirms the majority of eastern meditation wisdom, the practices at least, of course, Asia had millennia of trial and error to work out the mysteries of the mind. A user's guide to the brain, in a sense, to prepare for the coming of it's ultimate incarnation, Anime. Is what I would like to believe, but even I, who likes Anime so much he became an Anime Girl, can't help but compare it to the western thinking of the Stoics. Greek philosophy, eudaimonia, etc. Basically— basically. Here is what I want to say.

This situation? Is not hopeless. I'm not a dumb person, but I'm no tensai(genius). I have a strange understanding of the most basic concepts of reality due to brain problems, but, I also have great knowledge and learning in stock.

Gilgamesh in Fate/Stay Night had his treasure trove of heroes weaponry. Gilgamesh, the king of heroes, who, at the start of his original story, was having sex with all the women(yes all), and this got his subjects mad enough to beg the gods for aid. In answer, they cloned Gilgamesh. And then, the people of the city sent out a priestess to recruit the clone.

The priestess had sex with the clone. And thus the story of a smug fucker teaming up with his own clone sent by the gods to punish him to do awesome things. This applies to me. Somehow. I hope? Anyways, whats really important is feeling awesome about my challenge, rather than feeling awful about my challenge. Because, as humans evolved to survive, we always seek out challenge anyways— so if I am miserable waking up to a naked Yarko, I might as well be miserable anywhere else!

In comparison, isn't this a rather light challenge? I've played underwater timed escort quests in video games that had me more upset. The sudden realization of contrasting the visualization of an underwater timed escort quest to a naked Yarko beside had me laughing.

Either way, there are questions google can never answer. And, I no longer have google. But. I have puzzles to solve. Even if I just sat here, I'm sure there would be no pressing problems. Physically, I'd be fine. I will survive. It's not like my scarf is going to strangle me or anything. Theoretically. Anyways, I think a lot, so let's think this through, let's list out all the puzzles:

What happened the other day? Why do I have a bad feeling that I met Hohemi, somehow? Did I drown Ouji? Why is there a city on the Moon? How strong are Moon Elves compared to me, since I wasn't even considered 'amazing' by the Guild Secretaries standards? Why is there a katana by the side of my bed? And why is it so sexy? How do I get Stehy to stop wrapping herself around my foot? Oh, and there's that weird promise Stehy made me make to 'play hero.' And, the homunculi in the sewers are ominous. Maybe do something with that? Should I kill all the Low Elves out of pity? They are a disgusting existence, so wiping them out like roaches, well, lets put that one aside. I already know I don't like killing, so let's drop it. And— conquering the city in order to change it's sexual culture that I personally have a problem with, namely, pederasty. Oh, and if Ouji is dead or not.

Ah, as I pieced out all the puzzle pieces I began to see a common element. Me. All of them involve me not moving. Oh. And. Overwhelming myself. What was that I read about 'autism' and hypersensitivity or low sensitivity? The general gist I understood from that is it varies from autist to autist, but sensory issues are prevalent. Myself, I would think a lot and get very excited, and do a lot of pacing, mad scientist hand wringing. I never solved the mystery of if the mad scientist hand wringing was something I saw on TV as a kid and copied, or it was something the people on the TV copied from watching an autist. Either way, I learned early on in my last life not to do that in public! And to not suck my thumb either.

I realized the vastness of the stress I've already put myself under. I'm the one piloting this brain— Anime Girl is present, but it's not like she's me. I assume. Anyways! Bad idea to think about it! Okay. So let's reduce the difficulty here. By a lot. By everything.

I think I understand an important lesson now. I didn't understand this in my life as an autist, not even once, but I can see it now that I am an Anime Girl.

There is a pattern that repeats with me. I get overwhelmed. I use a lot of words. I engaged with every little thing I come across. I am easily stimulated. And, along with this stimulation, comes a lot of derailment. I am, in a sense, a train without breaks.

I am a fallen angel. My left loafer levitated, the black shadow speckled with grey foaming around it, and then it fell. Okay. Now that I know that, I need help. Someone logical. Someone even minded, someone with a mind that obeys rules, that can help me stay on the right— I looked to the loli below me. She slept soundly, one of her small brown ponytails draped like silk over my shin.

Naruhodo. Naruhodo. (I understand)

[Wakaranai desu.] (I don't understand.)

Anime Girl. Yarko can translate, so let's talk. In English.

[...masen.]

What?

[sumimasen.]

What does she mean?

[Muzukashi. Hou tou te, Wizard.] (It's difficult. Leave it, Wizard.)

Okay. Piece of the puzzle I remembered: Anime Girl doesn't want to talk to me directly. Yarko told me indirectly what Anime Girl says, but, when I asked Anime Girl to explain some things before, she said something similar. Something else was too difficult to understand, or she couldn't translate it, or whatever. Then, there's only one other option. Stehy.

I didn't want to admit it, I understand that now. I was trying to play it off as a question Anime Girl can answer, but there's really only one sensible person here in the first place.

[Sumimasen, ne?]

She didn't sound happy. I'll dogeza in response. I'll apologize to Anime Girl, because her feelings matter too. I can care about other people's feelings, too! If they are an Anime Girl! At least. I almost went off into another derailment about how empathy isn't real, but I dropped it. What's important is I care about someone. I just hope the house Anime Girl built in my head isn't pink.

I shook Stehy on her shoulder, waking her up. She blearily wandered about the room, gradually gaining consciousness. I suppose she needs to charge in the mornings. To be safe, I moved her in front of a window, thinking she might be solar powered.

All attempts to start conversation were met with various vocalizations of brain no working. So. Not a morning person.

I went downstairs and got some breakfast from Imouto, who was up and cooking. She gave me a snide glance. I could ask her. I'm not sure what her relationship is with Ouji, but having one of the strongest in the world giving me a snide glance made me feel like not starting a conversation.

It's my default to treat people like vending machines, anyways. I heard a statistic once, for every three people in japan, there is one vending machine. Perhaps there's something there? Well, confucianism in general has high structural standards for society. Either way, thousands of years of following Confucian teachings, and you have giant robots being made. The giant robot part is important. I think?

I went upstairs with the food, Stehy was draped over the bed, clinging to Yarko's right foot. She must have an internal compass for this sort of thing. I kneeled before the bed, sitting on my shins in proper japanese seiza, I laid the food out in front of me. I despaired that I couldn't arrange it in the proper fashion of— I don't know. There was this feeling like something was wrong with how the food was a bowl of soul and a plate of tentacle flesh. As if I was expecting more plates or smaller portion sizes. "This is not a proper offering!"

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Maybe that's what my japanese spirit is saying? It's a strange feeling. I am an Anime Girl, so, I guess I count as japanese? If I emigrate, would I be given honorary status as a citizen? Just because I am an anime girl doesn't mean I'm not a gajin(foreigner), so despite being the result of the creation of japanese media, I may not actually be 'Japanese.'

As I pondered such uselessness—

Stehy woke up, taking the ale I offered to her. She sat above me on the edge of the bed like a household god. But, it's a loli, so ale is fine.

「I have been thinking。」Stehy said as she lowered the glass from her lips.

"And?"

「Perhaps。I was too hard on you。」

"I have no memory of yesterday. Please excuse me for pushing aside your ominous comment, but I'm really only interested in if Ouji is dead by my hand or not right now."

Stehy nodded. For what I said to her, she sure did take it quite lightly.

「Exactly。At first, from observing your mind from the inside, and reviewing your memories, I thought you were a good person。」

"You're being ominous, again!"

Stehy turned and looked at Yarko's naked body, a glance was enough for her before she returned her gaze to the me sitting seiza at the bedpost below here.

「There is no point in explaining it to you。」

"I'm being serious. I remember reading the letter the moon elf wrote to me, running out of the library carrying Ouji, then my memory isn't there."

Stehy sipped her ale some more.

"Don't tell me you think I'm lying! You can literally read my mind, right? So, there's no point!"

「I am only a shoe。」

"You are clear more than a shoe."

「Is that so?」

What is this? Is she being cold? I can't tell at all.

"If I did anything wrong, I can't apologize for it. Don't blame me for what I can't even remember I did wrong."

Stehy looked down on me, imperious.

「At this point, I suppose I should be clear。We're not friends。」Stehy said.

"Is Ouji dead?" I'm getting mad. No one would ever know if I got mad or not, because all that happens when I get mad is I get quiet. And I'm usually quiet anyways.

Stehy waved her hand. I breathed out, long and low, I didn't understand how much tension my body was under until now.

I really don't like thinking of myself as a murderer.

「If you had killed him, I wouldn't be talking to you。Instead, what you did was far worse。」

"I am innocent!" I pleaded in front of Stehy. I don't know what I did, but I am innocent!

「You, when approached by her assassin, chatted with her freely and happily, then went to drink with her in the tavern below。All while the Prince you were supposed to be guarding was deposited in his room like trash。And, you didn't even request anyone of us to keep an eye on him at all。You are his bodyguard, you have been paid, at least do the minimum for appearances。」

She's mad about that? Oh. I completely forgot why Ouji was giving me money. Actually, it's not like I entered in any agreement with him—

「I can tell from your face。You believe that because there was no verbal or written contract, that money could change hands without responsibility。That is unforgivable。」

"I really don't care." I said.

「Which is why I said there wasn't any point in explaining。」

So, this entire conversation thus far was Stehy being upset about something as minor as extorting Ouji's money? Oh, wait, there was a clue, wasn't there. 'Assassin.' What did Ouji say? "I don't go there(Artist's Mount) anymore." Assassins from Artist's Mount? The dream did have Hohemi in it. I don't know anything about Artists, but she did make a mean tentacle hoodie. And so.

I drank last night with Hohemi, likely revealing my prior life experience. Then, what about the other memories? Why do I think Ouji is dead? I got up.

"Stehy. This is a matter of life and death. Do you remember where I put Ouji?"

Stehy sighed.「There is no need for investigation。Do you really think the assassin left during the night and finished him?」

'The assassin left?' I don't understand. If Ouji's assassin is Hohemi, where would Hohemi leave from—

and, clothed in my blazer, Hohemi walked out from the bathroom. She had a hand in front of her face, yawning large. I turned to stone at the sight. It was impossible. The laws of physics were shattered. If I had seen a ghost emerge from the walls, I would be less afraid? How?! Why?! How and Why?! And what happened?!

Hohemi sat on the bed next to Stehy, inching up from behind her back. Stehy reached behind her slapping Hohemi's attempts to invade her personal space like swatting away a fly, and I watched in horror as Hohemi sleepily grumbled and curled up on the bed. She is wearing my blazer! It has no personality, but it's still my clothing! You monster! And! She's snuggling up against my scarf!

I looked away. I couldn't take it. I felt like I was going to lose it. I played too many horror games where if you look directly at the monster the screen starts shaking, because I felt the exact same effect right now. The floor I was looking at, indeed, has no girls of any kind there, who had or had not slept with me, and had or had not violated my chasity, it is only a floor, just a floor, an oaken— I don't know. It's wood! It's wood and not flesh! That is what's important!

「As you can see。The assassin was here all night, so if there is a dead body here, it was the result of another assassin。It was a mistake for you to assume there was only one assassin, so if your employer is dead it is already too late。You had ample forces to deploy。I have no combat ability, but at the least I could have stayed with Ouji last night to warn you if a second assassin had appeared。」

No Ouji gettin' my lolis— wait, there are more important problems here! What about the most important issue! Why won't she say it! My body and voice trembled out the words.

"What happened, last night?"

「'That'? Oh, it's nothing。Why do you look so worried? Do you care that much about whether Ouji was assassinated or not?」

I stood up. I grabbed Stehy, heaving her body under my arm, I carried her out into the hallway. Stehy didn't make a sound as I walked down the hallway.

"I'm just going to wander around aimlessly. If I happen to be around his room, it would be nice if my shoe told me which room it was. My shoe is not my friend, sure! But until then, I am going to wander aimlessly."

This is how I know I'm mad. I'm carrying my loli under one arm draped like towel, hoping I can see whether I can find an un-dead Ouji body. Really, I wanted out of the room. Action brings clarity. Action. brings. clarity.

And so I acted for clarity.

「This is comfortable。」

"Really?"

I am upset. I paced around the halls of the inn, stopping at each door. I'm hoping Stehy says something. Either that, or I'll just keep walking. Maybe I can go back to the forest and hang out with the Forest King(female). Maybe I can just forget it all, and years later, after training for years under the Forest King(female) in the combat arts, when asked by a journalist for a documentary, "You have been training under the legendary Forest King(female) for years, would you tell us why?" I could answer "Such is, as it is. What you see is all that is there." And then I walk away, mysteriously, fade into the mist, and—

I reached the roof. Looking up at the sky, it's filled with the yellow. No gold. Just yellow light, a blue sky, the moon city large and visible even in daylight. I wasn't used to looking up at the sky and seeing such a large planet, so I forgot my troubles for a moment, adjusting the loli hanging from my arm.

"That's it. Stehy. Summon the [U.S.S. Enterprise]! Summon it right now!"

I held out my arm above my head like a towel rack. Stehy draped over it looked half-asleep, but she answered anyways.

「What are you talking about。」

"I saw your adventurer's card, Stehy! You can totally summon the [U.S.S. Enterprise]! It's on your skills list! I want to go to the moon, right now!"

「You are being irrational。」

"Yes!" I said. I know. I know, but, I'm clearly not caring.

「I don't understand your request。」Stehy spoke in an even tone.

"Take out your card. I'll show it to you. You can do it. I believe in you."

「That card you gave me? It's a card。What did you expect from it?」

"That it told me your secret abilities! You're holding out on me! Both of us can go to the moon right now!"

「That sounds like magic, or something。You are energetic, this early in the morning。」

I remonstrated myself internally. Surely, I am overcome with emotion, and not thinking correctly. What words do I need to properly understand the situation? Clues. Detail!

"Then, tell me, in detail, what happened in my room, last night!"

「'That'? Everyone does it every night, does it need explaination?」

"I slept. I only, you only saw me sleeping, is that correct?"

「Of course。There is a bed。What else is done there?」

"Sexual relations!"

「Well, yes, but you aren't that type of person。」

I don't know why, but hearing it so flatly said from my loli floored me. I sank to the ground, letting Stehy down from my arm, she curled up against my waist.

「The sunlight's warm。I'm going back to sleep。」

Maybe. Maybe I was right. Maybe she is solar powered. ha ha.

No, wait, that isn't the— there has to be more to it! Yarko was naked, and then Hohemi— suddenly, my mind did a one hundred and eight degree spin.

Puzzles, can be solved. I understood it in that moment! The closed room mystery is finished! I can see the ending!

----------------------------------------

First ~ The number of possible solutions.

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Second ~ The number of steps required to solve.

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Third ~ The number of options the solver is able to execute.

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Fourth ~ What does the solver know?

1st, I don't know. The room wasn't closed. I have no data. But! 2nd, there are two people capable of the crime: Yarko and Hohemi. 3rd, of the two options, both are unpredictable! And 4th! What do I know! Everything!

Because, from the start there was only one entity which couldn't be violated. There was one absolute guard that required that nothing untoward happened. This was a strictly platonic relation, in every sense, because— Anime Girl is not upset.

That was the missing piece. I couldn't have solved it, unless I talked to Yarko and/never Hohemi, with Anime Girl's silence, I know nothing of importance occurred. There was only one complicating factor, right from the beginning! Yarko was naked! That was all! It was just her naked body that led me to believe lewd action was taken! But, Anime Girl could never allow that! She would never! I have faith, so I don't need investigation!

The door behind me opened, and I heard Ouji's voice call out from behind me.

"Oh, hey. How'd last night go?"

I swirled. Looking down, Stehy was secured and sleeping at my waist! If I moved to confront Ouji, I'd wake her up. There is no need for hurry, Ouji's walking towards me, full golden armor and sword. I already have the most important answer, so I can rest easy.

Ouji sat down next to me. "What are you doing? Oh, it's 'Stehy', isn't it?" His hand went for Stehy's head. I knocked his arm away. Don't you dare headpat my loli.

"Violent as usual. Stehy's pretty cute. Where'd you meet all these girls? Did you all travel together before I met you?"

Eh? Oh, he talked to my clothes, but he doesn't know they are clothes. He thinks Stehy and Yarko are my companions, I guess. Wait, didn't I, yeah the last time I saw Ouji I knocked him through a floor of a library. Thinking about it, I'm glad he has such high durability or he would be dead, and more importantly, my morals would have been violated. I began to feel sorry(ier) for Ouji. Again. I had to ask him, I already knew the important answer, on the faith I had in Anime Girl's ability to protect her chastity, but, I still wanted to know the details, just for, my sake.

"What happened yesterday? I forgot. I ran out from the library, and then it's all dark for me."

"You forgot everything?" Ouji marveled.

"Yep." Yep. Yeeep.

"Oh. Well, then. It was pretty fun. You actually did your job, the one I hoped you'd help me with, you know, not being assassinated. I didn't expect that. For one, you nearly killed me yourself."

"I'm sorry."

"Thanks. That was a good hit. I always hated that dusty old library, I never thought my body would be used to break it. For a moment there, as I broke through the second floor, I was thinking how novel it all was. Then, the pain kicked in."

"How are you still alive?"

Ouji laughed. This guy, he's very good natured about how much violence I have inflicted on him. "I'm used to fighting. It's fun."

"I'm sorry." This simple bastard. He seems to really not give a damn. I couldn't imagine how this guy gets through the day, but this must be how he is such a riajuu, he barely minds small things like continous cold area of effect abilities or being knocked out by a girl. This is the 2nd time, the first time he didn't even mention it! What a great guy! I hate his guts!

Ouji patted my back. I wasn't fast enough to block him as I was occupied with my thoughts, so I dealt with it. It's when he lingered for more than a second that I decided action needed to be taken.

"So. What happened yesterday? I'm curious." Please tell me, oh riajuu sensei!

"Yeah. Well. I remember this much. I woke up at the Laughing Dragon, go downstairs, and the grey haired girl traveling with you had Hohemi hanging off of her, and you were talking to Hohemi about something and drinking a lot. Very loud, hurt my ears. Either you're planning to kill me this morning, or you blocked my assassin for me, either way, I'm impressed. I didn't think of that girl as someone who would be swayed easily. She is very dangerous, after all, but, so are you." Ouji chuckled. "Just the sight of you and her, talking together and drinking, it was enough to put my heart at ease. Two monsters, drinking like normal people. That was amusing."

"Hohemi's a monster? A homunculi?"

"No, no, she deals with them a lot, there aren't many who trade with the Sewers like she does, so she's quite the legend in Nephilz. One of the four kings of Artist's Mount, and unofficial leader of assassinations. Pretty big deal. I thought I was dead the first couple of times she tried to kill me, it was really tough, but I got by. So it was really nice to see her sitting there drinking like a normal girl with you, instead of laughing over my broken body with a dagger. Again."

I empathize with this man. So he too has felt the sting of Hohemi's magic. And he didn't have Anime Girl to counterspell his way out of it, he must have used other means. No, wait, how did he survive? Wasn't it like three times she tried to kill him? My mind immediately told me the answer, even though I didn't ask. It's Hohemi.

For that reason, somehow, I already knew. She's wanted to pressgang me into working, gave me clothes for little reason, manipulative type. Cheru was the one who put the hit out on Ouji, because he was hitting on her and Elu, Ouji said. Hohemi must have been purposely letting Ouji live so she could extort more money from Cheru. I was absolutely sure of it! Ouji's only alive because there was no money in having him die!

Wait, then why did Hohemi make Ouji suffer in the first place. Oh. If she didn't, then Cheru wouldn't have payed her. I guess a half-killing is more okay than a full killing? This isn't ethical, at any rate. If you're an assassin, the target should die. That's how it should be done! Wait, what am I arguing about with myself? This is stupid.

"I'm sorry." I repeated to Ouji.

"For what?"

"Hohemi's in my room. For some reason."

"Oh. You, uh, did 'that' with her?"

"I don't know. No memory, remember?"

"Ah. Well, thanks for telling me, I'll go hide somewhere else for today. If she's not where I am, she can't try to kill me again, right?" Ouji laughed, standing up, I watched as he casually strode off the roof the of the inn. I knew he was strong, but it was strange to see someone exit by dropping off a rooftop. Who does that? What a mystery.