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Why U So Stupid?

So as we walk towards Sid and the Dockmaster, Sid turns back around and starts yelling with his sailors mouth.

Sid:"WHO THE FLYING FUCK DO YOU THINK YOUR TALKING TO YOU SHITSTAIN? YOU BETTER GIVE ME A DAMN GOOD REASON BEFORE I KEELHAUL YOU BY YOUR TINY PRICK WHILE YOU WATCH AS I FUCK YOUR MOTHER IN HER ASS. I AM MORE THAN SOME COMMON THUG, I AM THE MOTHERFUCKING ADMIRAL OF THE ETERNIAN NAVY. NOW YOU BETTER LET MY MEN COME ASHORE BEFOR I STICK MY FOOT SO FAR UP YOUR ASS, MY TOENAILS BECOME YOUR TEETH." I taught him that last bit there. Brings a tear to your eye seeing them grow so fast.

*sheds single manly tear*

The dockmaster for all hes worth seems to be taking the very imminant threat to his life very well. The smug looking elf, now that i can see him up close, seems to give no fucks. 

Dockmaster:"Sure you are, and i wear ladies underwear."

Dorian:"I wouldnt doubt it." I say to Lilith and the others, chuckling.

Lilith:"Your probably right Dorian, you can smell his femininity. Also you can smell the period blood." She laughs as well. I just love a woman who knows how to keep a joke going.

The dockmaster seems to take offense to that as he slowly reaches to his sword and his stance shifts ever so slightly.

Dorian:"Ya better think twice before you draw that blade bitchboy. Otherwise ill shove it through your taint. Trust me on this, when I make a threat I keep it. No matter the consequence." I know it seems really sadistic, but I don't like people threatening those I care for. Well today we must all be very ornery. I havnt heard this much cursing since the 5th grade.

The dumbass actually drew his blade. 

I dont make threats i make promises.

Dorian:"Now what the fuck did I just say?"I say as I then proceed to Force Choke him into the air while turning him horizontal. I then Force Pull the sword from his hand and stab it into the area between his ass and balls, otherwise known as the taint.

The dockworkers then have horrified looks on their faces while Sid looks extatic and starts to laugh.

Dorian:"Did i do ya proud grampa Sid?" I say in my best southern accent. Too late to too back now.

I really think the power has gone to my head.

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Damn, the dude is still alive. Well thats the vitality stat for you.

Damn... someone needs to shut this dude up. He had a high pitched voice before but now its like three octaves higher.

Dorian:"Hey asshole i warned you. But did you heed my warning? Noooo~?" I say as an angel flies towards us and removes the sword from the now former dockmasters taint.

Angel:"See now why did you have to go and do that? I was just coming to tell you you guys can dock. Now i gotta do a bunch of paperwork and report this." Says the now visibly tired looking angel.

How can an Angel be lazy? Isnt that like one of the cardinal sins or some shit? Well i guess there is no room for religious stereotypes in different worlds.

Sid:"Sorry about that Muriel, the young Dorian tends to make good on his threats. Its actually very refreshing to see one so adamant about keeping his word. I mean on the way here, there was a Drider who started trying to rape Thia while we were in an inn and paralyzing all of us with magic. Then Dorian used his Power to break the Driders concentration be choking him, then he crushed the Driders legs one by one and snapping them off, before castrating the Drider with one of the torches on the wall. Was a bit terrifying if we are to be honest."

Dorian:"Yeah, i even gained a few charisma from that. Like 5 man." Yeah some things happened on the trip.

As we made it too an inn and refueling station for the airship, we had gone downstairs for dinner. After a few minutes, a Drider and a few of his friends came in.

The jackasses decided to try hitting on Lilith and Thia. 

Very obviously that was not well received by Thia and Lilith.

They essentially told them to fuck off, and surprisingly they did.

If only for a half hour. Next thing we knew, we were all paralyzed.

Then the Jackasses came up to us and the Drider started monologueing.

No lie, like full on James Bond villain, monologueing.

So as he was doing so, he started feeling up Thia and undressing her.

I dont condone rape so when i saw someone trying to do that to a friend, i sorta flipped the fuck out.

I, in my rage, use the Force to throw the Drider across the room and start choking and crushing him. I then started snapping each one of his legs off one by one until he dispelled the paralyzation and let us free.

The next thing I did was grab a torch off the wall and stab him in his dick with the flaming side.

Twas no dicksplosion, but you take what you can get.

I may be a sadistic asshole, but im a Loyal Sadistic Asshole.

Thia:"Yeah i pretty much owe Dorian my life now."

Dorian:"I keep telling you, you dont. I did that purely because you are one of my best friends and that rape is one of the things i hate the most."

Thia:"Its precisely because you did it out of your principles that i owe you my Life, you could have let him succeed, but you didnt."

Muriel:"Did he just friendzone himself?" She whispers to Sid.

Sid:"No, hes been friends with her for the last 2 1/2 months. Hes been trying to start a relationship with Lilith. Though they do seem to be having a "dry spell'."He whispers back.

I can hear you two...

We then go towards one of the hotels nearest the Academy. We wont be staying in the dorms till the school year actually starts. 

We say goodbye to Sid and then head to our seperate rooms to unpack and get ready for dinner. We will be wandering around the city while we wait for they school year to start.