All of the spare blankets were in my closet.

I had just put the couch throw away while I was cleaning up the apartment, getting ready for my girlfriend to move in.

The couch was cold without any blankets.

I didn’t manage to get much sleep and as soon as the sun rose I knew I wasn’t going to get anymore.

My toothbrush is in the bathroom off of my bedroom. As is all my clean clothes.

I’m tempted to go in to my bedroom and get ready for work but if I upset mrs. crazy I could end up with the bed side lamp imbedded in my skull.

If she could almost destroy my refrigerator door with a wooden spoon any item on my bedside table would be just as lethal.

Great, there is spaghetti sauce all over my shoes and jacket. Could this morning please start to get better? I could really use a win right now.

...

I guess I’m going to work in yesterday’s clothes covered in tomato sauce.

———

“What do you mean a demon crashed your romantic dinner? You mean your girlfriends mother?”

On my lunch break I decided to text Max and tell her about last night.

“No. A real demon, with horns and a bad attitude.”

“Ha, your cooking was that bad, huh?”

“It tasted fine to me but my girlfriend was pretty upset with our uninvited guest.”

“Guest? Are you trying to tell me that there really is a demon.”

“That’s what I’ve been saying.”

“I thought you were just being weird.”

“Nope. She stole my bedroom and basically is acting like she owns the place.”

“She? I guess I could see why your girlfriend was upset. Do you need me to come kick her out?”

“I don’t think you could. She almost killed me with a spoon.”

“That sounds painful.”

“If you think you can convince her to leave without getting killed I’m all for you trying.”

“Okay, I’ll pick you up after work and we’ll go have a talk with this demoness.”

If you stumble upon this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen from Royal Road. Please report it.

Great. If anyone could convince this demon to do something it would be Max. She can talk me in to almost anything. For example, she convinced me to cook last night even though I knew something bad would happen.

I guess I didn’t really know how bad though.

Work flew by and I only had most of my coworkers comment on my messy appearance.

Sure enough when I get out to the parking garage Max is there waiting for me with her old rusty pickup.

She really loves that truck.

“Hey! Jump in. Let’s go teach this demon who’s apartment that really is.”

“She could have left already. She said something about going on vacation for a decade or something but she never said she was planning on spending the entire time there.”

“Well, if she’s gone then I’ll just have to hang out for a while and make sure she doesn’t come back.”

“I have some of last nights dinner left over. I could show you the evidence of why I should never be let into a kitchen ever again.”

“I could eat. I’m sure it’s not that bad. You ate it and said it was fine and this demon woman ate it too, right?”

“She really liked it. I don’t know if that’s a good thing, or a bad thing.”

“I half sent you that recipe as a joke you know. It was a romantic meal but it was a bit more complicated that most. When you said you didn’t understand I sent you that funny “how not to cook” video and I didn’t hear back from you.”

“That was a how not to cook video? I didn’t understand anything past the first few seconds.”

“You didn’t think it was odd that the person cooking ran the chicken breast over with a car? I thought it was obvious it was a joke. Now I’m not so sure I want to eat your leftovers.”

“I didn’t really watch much of the video. I just tried to follow the recipe how it was.”

“Oh. Then it couldn’t have come out that bad.”

“Why is there a police car out front of my apartment? It couldn’t be because of that crazy demon, could it?”

“There are more apartments in your building than just your’s. I’m sure it’s nothing.”