“This place is much larger than the camp I made,” Eric commented as he looked around his new home.

“I started with the smaller one too, but I got so much stuff from the adventurers that I needed a larger place.”

“Do you run into them often?”

“No. They are rare to find. Which means we’re pretty deep in the dungeon.”

“How deep?”

“I’m certain that we’re lower than fiftieth level.”

“That doesn’t tell me much … because there are no dungeons like this where I come from.”

Phisola sighed heavily: “Long story short, only the most determined and the best-equipped adventurers will come down here. This place is very dangerous for mortals. Dangerous beasts roam these halls.”

“Really? The only beasts I’ve seen were those dinosa … those reptiles that are walking on two legs.”

“You didn’t explore much, did you?”

“True … you got me before I could see more than a few clearings.”

“Count yourself extremely lucky then. Those reptiles are called gustercine. They’re pretty much harmless.”

“Harmless, my ass!”

“Ok, I guess they could harm you. But they’re nothing compared to some of the other beasts around here. You can find gustercine even on the upper levels, that’s how weak they are. That being said, they are playing an important role in the ecosystem and are quite widespread in the dungeons, so I’m not surprised you ran into them.”

“I even managed to befriend one.”

“I remember hearing some screeching before seeing you.”

Eric smiled sourly, “Yeah … that was him.”

“Some friend he turned out to be.”

“Had I known what was waiting for me, I’d be running too.”

That drew a smirk on Phisola’s face: “You appear to be ignorant beyond measure. I don’t remember ever meeting someone as uninformed as you, not even among the servants. That’s probably why you’re brought here in the first place.”

“Well, excuse me for being born into an alien world where magic doesn’t exist and gods aren’t real. I admit that I’m ignorant of this world as much as you’re ignorant of electricity.”

“Actually, it’s good that you’re ignorant. Gods know what they’re doing, and they didn’t choose you for no reason.”

“Ohh, I’m so honored!”

“You’re annoying as fuck due to that ignorance, but it does feel good to have a different kind of conversation once in a while. It’s boring when people are constantly obeying your every word. I must admit that I do enjoy your squirmish sarcasm a little bit. It’s annoying but also refreshing.”

“Thank you very much,” he responded with no enthusiasm in his voice.

“Just don’t make me repeat myself over and over again. I can tolerate a little bit of ignorant arrogance, but I can’t tolerate stupidity. So make sure you pay attention to my every word.”

“Were you some kind of noble back home? You did mention that your mother was interested in a portal.”

“Hmm … if I’d have to compare cubus society with the retards of Greadinall, you could say that I’m a princess.”

“So, a royalty?”

“No, we don’t have royalty. We only have lords. Cubus are way too proud to have a king, or gods forbid, Emperor. My mother is a lord back home, and I’m her second eldest child. But that doesn’t mean I’m in line to the throne. Lords are chosen based on their performance, not on their heritage. Which means that I, myself, am pretty much unimportant.”

“Ah, I see. That’s very cool. A meritocracy?”

“Indeed.”

“We have a similar thing back home. Our rulers aren’t chosen based on their heritage either.”

You might be reading a stolen copy. Visit Royal Road for the authentic version.

“That’s nice to hear, but we have more pressing matters to discuss. Do you want to get out of here?”

“You mean, out of this dungeon?”

“What else would I be talking about?”

“Maybe you’re referring to your camp as here?”

As soon as he saw her rolling her eyes, he raised his palms in surrender: “I’m not trying to be annoying. I just want to be sure.”

“But you are being annoying! Don’t you dare pin that on me! You’re being sarcastic once again!”

“Sorry, I’m sorry. I’m just not used to being looked down on, that’s all. I’m not trying to start a confrontation.”

“Do you want to get out of here or not!”

“I do, I do. That’s what I’ve been trying to do ever since I came here.”

“I’ve told you there is a way to do it, and I have a plan. It’s obvious you’re not very bright, but surely you remember that. Riiight?” She theatrically furrowed her brows as she got in his face.

“Yes, of course. And something tells me it’s not about climbing our way up.”

“No. Not only are we way too deep, but we’d constantly be pestered by the adventurers too. However, there’s an easier way out. We can leave the same way we got here.”

“Did we get teleported in?”

Phisola let out a disappointed sigh: “Yes, smarty. We got teleported here.”

“I was almost certain that’s the case, but I’ve never been teleported before. I was walking down the corridor, and then suddenly, I was in a cave. There was no warning, my surroundings changed in an instant.”

“Yes, smarty, that’s what teleportation looks like.”

“Actually, I’m wrong! I did get teleported once, when I came into this world! But that teleport was obvious, you could see it from miles away. It wasn’t glowing, it was like a window into a different place. But I saw nothing when I got teleported here. Everything changed in a flash.”

“That’s because there are different ways of teleportation. And the way that got us here is something no mortal could ever pull off. No mere mortal is capable of such magical finesse.”

“So gods, huh?”

“Not all immortals are gods. In fact, gods are quite few.”

“Anyway, you’re trying to teleport us out of here?”

“I was trying to teleport myself. But you can come along for the ride if you promise to be a good, obedient boy.”

“Sure, why not? I have nothing better to suggest anyway. But I’m wondering something. Let’s say your plan succeeds, and we teleport ourselves out of here.”

“I teleport us out of here,” she narrowed her eyes at him.

“You teleport us out of here. What if we get teleported back here again? Whoever has teleported us can certainly do it again. Please correct me if I’m wrong, but as far as I know, magic consumes much energy. Why would these immortals be ok with us just packing up and leaving after everything they went through to get us here?”

Phisola turned her entire body to face him, looking completely shocked.

“Are you … are you thinking? Am I hearing you think, or have I started hallucinating?”

“I’m not knowledgeable of magic, customs, or lore, but I do know a thing or two about investments.”

“Hmm … that’s good. Here, let me praise you a little bit,” Phisola said while patting Eric’s head.

But, he recoiled back: “Hey, hey, have you already forgotten? My head hurts like hell! Touching it will only make it worse.”

“Oh yeah, I did forget. Anyway, good thinking! Baby steps, but that’s still something. Yes, they could teleport us again. They can teleport you, for sure. But with me, it’s a little bit different. I came here of my own will. They can’t just teleport me on a whim.”

“Is it because you’re a mage?”

“Among other things. And I think they’ve teleported you here because of me. Why you out of all people, I don’t know. They certainly could’ve made a better choice. But they didn’t teleport you so close to my lair for no reason. They wanted me to find you.”

“I thought we agreed we’d start our relationship from the beginning, so why are you demeaning me so?”

“I’m not demeaning you! I’m just being honest and realistic! Do you honestly think you’re the best possible choice?”

“I don’t even want to be here!”

“I’m leagues above you in every way possible! Had we met under normal circumstances, I wouldn’t even look at you!”

“Ok, fair enough, but why do you have to be so mean, for fuck’s sake? Can’t you keep something for yourself? You don’t have to say whatever is on your mind, especially if it won’t fix anything! You’re only causing more strain in our relationship!”

“Hmm … but they did choose one thing right though … and maybe that’s why you’re here. Sure, you may be an idiot, but you do have some diplomatic skills. I must say that you’re taking this very well. You got clubbed, raped, degraded, and yet you’re still keeping it together instead of losing your mind. It may be a sign of cowardice, but it’s the only reason you’re still alive. I have to admit that my mental state is far from ideal. The centuries I’ve spent down here are taking their toll. This is the last place a fashionable girl like me should be in. So, had some hot-ass beacon of masculinity walked up to me and started giving me attitude and sass, he wouldn’t last long. Sure, you can be sassy too, but I just can’t take your sass seriously. And you also know when to stop with it and start being obedient. But some really hot guy who thinks everything is about him … that’s the last thing I need right now.”

“Wait a minute … are you trying to say that you find my company pleasant? It’s hard to tell.”

“Hmm … I can’t say pleasant, but it’s certainly refreshing. Finally, something is different around here.”

“You ran into some adventurers. I don’t think it would be hard for you to charm some of them.”

“I … did try, but … it didn’t work out. It’s hard to get on someone’s good side once you’ve murdered all of their friends.”

She hunched down a bit and scratched her head idly: “Maybe that’s why they’ve sent me someone as submissive as you, after seeing me fail. I mean, sure, you’re not hot, but you can be serviceable in the short term. And it doesn’t look like you’ll force me to do something I’ll regret later. Maybe a compromising diplomat like you is exactly what I need right now: someone who’s more willing to listen than talk. And certainly not talk back. And even when you do, it sounds more like a playful spat than an outright disrespect. So … everything looks ok so far … I guess. I’m willing to give you a chance.”

“That’s … I appreciate it. I must admit that your situation didn’t cross my mind once. I can only imagine what centuries of isolation can do to a person.”

“Yeah, well, just keep your sarcasm to a minimum, and you’ll be fine. Now, let me show you the most important part of my camp.”