Chapter 19 - Path of a Hero
I've been dreading today over the last year, everything seems dark. The air is tense and the atmosphere is gloomy, today is the day I tell everyone goodbye as I depart out on my own. I have noticed an overwhelming wall I would need to climb before I'm satisfied with myself, I've slayed countless Ogres, Hobgoblins and Goblins and I haven't levelled once in over a year...
Today I turn 10, I know most people will never understand my predicament... But I swore to protect everyone around me, and how can I do that... How can I protect people, no... How can I rule over people while being weak, I can't it's just not something I will be able to do. I need to get stronger, I need to stop being so contempt with my life currently... I've gotten to comfortable being weak, I know others may resent me for this but it can't be helped... Today I leave the Quill Estate, today I leave everyone to find myself... I have my resolve all that's left is finding the words to break it to everyone... Goddess please help me in my time of need for I know you are watching me, please give me the strength to find the words I need to say...
I walk out of my room in despair my feet are sluggish almost feeling like there's a chain bound to them. My back is hunched over from carrying the weight of peoples expectations of me, it has all slowly become too much. If I must carry this burden I wish to do it proudly, I wish to look my people in the eyes knowing I can protect them for whatever is to come after us... I can't do that right now, how can I lead by example when I can't even lead myself to strength...
I entered the kitchen where my family sits everyone just looks up at me with beaming eyes of joy... I don't return the same gaze, my gaze is much darker right now. Almost as if you can see the depths of despair in them, if you look in them too long you are bound to fall in the abyss with me...
"Onyx... Are you okay? I thought you would be happy to see everyone today..."
Emily called out to me worriedly, but her voice fell into the void. She did mean what she said, everyone is here today... But this only further resolves my decision, seeing everyone that I've come to love all gathered in one place. What would I do if a dragon attacked us right now, I couldn't do anything but watch my family be burned to a crisp. Cry in my misery hoping the dragon spares them, hoping the dragon will at least make our deaths quick and painless. These dreams these thoughts have been haunting me every night for the last two years, I'm at the end of my resolve... I can feel the weight of the world laying on top of me... It's almost too heavy to hold up, I grit my teeth and take another step. My vision goes black, it feel's like the whole world around me has just fell and I'm not strong enough to pick it back up...
"ONYX!"
I can hear my family and friends yell my name, but I can't answer them. I don't have the strength too, I might as well have both Earth and Gaia chained to each arm pulling me apart. The longer I stay weak the more I fall into despair, I need to leave... I need to...
*Splash*
I'm attacked by ice cold water, the chill has made it's way throughout my whole body. I feel as if I am swimming laps in ice filled oceans, the sudden change in temperature has temporarily woken me up from the abyss of despair I was falling into...
"What has gotten into you son, you look like you've seen a ghost"
Thomas is making jokes about my condition, but he isn't far off. For it's not ghosts I've been seeing it's the future if only there was a way I can better explain it to everyone. That they will all die soon, and there is nothing I can do to protect them... At least not if I stay in this city, I need to seek out the remaining gear of the Hero and slay stronger monsters... No I need to become the Monster to the Monsters, have my name strike fear into them for generations... Only then could I even think about settling down and enjoying life, how could I have been so foolish to be complacent all these years...
This realization of weakness has dawned on me ever since I tapped into my spatial attribute, controlling space and time is a blessing and a curse... For every night I am stuck watching my despair in the future, every time I make progress the story unfolds slightly differently but ends the same way. My overwhelming defeat by a foe that is stronger then the last, everyone lays in ashes while I'm saved for last... Stuck watching everyone and everything I love come crashing down beside me, and the only thing I can do is sit on my knees and watch, that's how overwhelmingly weak I am compared to these atrocities how can these even be classified as monsters... They are more like catastrophes who are destined to destroy the world. What's the point in being a prodigy among prodigies if I'm dealing with Catastrophe like monsters, who's to say there isn't prodigies born from monsters...
"I... I have to leave for a long time"
I could only murmur those last words, everyone goes silent while looking at me. This joyous day has turned into a day of sadness, for they all come together to celebrate with me and share love and laughs. Only to have that taken away by the one they wished to embrace, I'm sorry to everyone who showed up today and bared witness to my presence.
"Whatttt! What do you mean Onyx, you are talking crazy talk"
Sophy yelled while jumping on top of me almost holding me in place, overwhelmed by my appearance and words I can feel her hysteria build. Tears are dripping onto my face, while her head tilts back releasing cries.
"Y-you can't be serious right now son... Today of all days, could it not have waited till after the party..."
My father berates my behavior right now, but if he saw what I saw in those dreams... If they all saw what I saw, they would not be smiling and laughing right now... They would be scared no they would be completely consumed in madness, for two years I watched my family die every night... And every death was different for each night, the possibilities of my uselessness know no bounds in the face of the monsters I dreamed about... It's truly frightening, I can't help but be gloomy how can I not be... I wouldn't be human if I could see those dreams and not be as I am now...
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"You will all understand soon enough... But I am too weak right now, I must go"
I pry Sophy off of my body, and make my way back to my feet. I still feel an overwhelming amount of weight on my shoulders, but soon I will be strong enough to bare it.
"You look like you've gone mad little brother, and too think I came all this way to see you..."
Sarah did come a long way to see me, and I apologize for her commitment as it's been wasted, I finally see my family all together again and the only thing I think of is leaving... How cruel are you being to me right now Goddess, why couldn't you have just made me normal...
"Sarah...Jack, Ricky, Mom and Dad... I'm so happy to see everyone together again, but understand I have to do this"
My hand is squeezed into a fist, so much so that blood has started to trickle down my fingers and onto the floor. I look up suppressing the oncoming tears of departure, but I can see in their faces that they trust me.. Whether they understand me or not is to be decided, but nevertheless the trust and faith in me is unwavering. I turn to look at Sophy and Abby they are both just hugging each other while crying.. I did not wish for everyone to be sad, I wished to leave and get strong... I just hoped everyone would of understood I'm only doing this for them, I will be back soon I promise.
"I... I will return before I leave for the Academy, you all have access to my Kingdom so we can keep in touch... But this is a journey I must take alone, I just hope one day you will understand..."
I go to turn around and make my way for the door, hoping they wouldn't stop me but instead understand and forgive me...
I reach out to the door, I can feel the cold iron of the door handle reach my fingertips. My hand is on the door, but I'm not able to turn the handle my mind wont let my body control my hands... There's something I must still do before leaving, I can't forgive myself if I leave on this note...
I turn around and face everyone they all look to be in a state of sadness, the room is overwhelmingly quiet with the faint sounds of tears falling to the floor.
"I know this is hard to understand now, but you will in the future. The future where I can actually protect and save each and everyone of you. I'm not asking you to forgive me for ruining this joyous day, but I ask you understand and trust me in doing this for the sake of everyone I wish to protect"
They are staring at me blankly, but there is no response coming from them... I really fucked this up didn't I... God damnit!
"I love all of you, just please know that. Sophy and Abby I promised you we will spend out lives together so I will be back to pick you up when the time comes... Father and Mother I promised you can live peacefully in my Kingdom, I will come back strong enough to make sure you both live peaceful lives. Sarah, Jake and Ricky how I've missed you all the last four years... I promise you three I will make it up to you in the future, Sarah I wish you nothing but happiness with your husband and child. Jake I know we left last time on a bad note as well, but I know you will be a great leader please make the Estate prosper. Ricky I know not of your plans of the future, but if you ever need my assistance please reach out to me. I will be at the Academy for your last year, please look over me..."
Having said goodbye to everyone in their own way, I can kind of feel some of the weight being lifted from me. I turn back around to make my way for the door but didn't make it there, I was assaulted on both sides by Sophy and Abby each one of them grabbing another arm as if it was only natural they would be coming with me on this journey... I look back at Godfrey to see if he will intervene, but he only winked at me and went back to drinking his tea...
"Y-you guys it will be very dangerous, I will be fighting things of legends."
I may have exaggerated a bit but I wanted to scare them away, I can't let them just follow me into a dangerous battlefield of unknown possibilities.
"Shut it stupid, we all expected this day to come. You just have terrible timing as always..."
Sophy scoffed at my audacity, to think I would leave her behind infuriated her.
"Ouch"
Abby pinched skin on the inside of my arm, but this time she hasn't let go she just keeps twisting the skin to cause me physical pain...
"Master is dumb.. BIG BIG DUMMY! You promised you would never leave me behind... You made that promise you liar!"
She screams at me with tears overflowing her eyes... To be fair to her, I did make that promise and I really overlooked the impact it would have if I left her... I thought she would just be understanding and know what I'm doing is dangerous. I just want to protect her and everyone else why am I stupid for thinking such thoughts...
"I'm sorry... I seem to have overlooked everyone's feelings"
I lower my head and fall into deep thought the nightmares of the future have been weighing heavy on me... Although I'm not alone, in these dreams I feel lonely as if the whole world has turned their back on me... I need to gather myself as I'm not alone, I just choose to push everyone away who wants to help me. To me I'm protecting them from the burden of life, but if I keep doing this I would only stunt their growth... I need to allow those around me to become strong as well...
"I know you want to protect everyone son, but you need to understand everyone here also wishes to protect you."
My father patted my head while lecturing me, I can see in his eyes a hint of pride. He knew this day would come, but he could of never guessed it to be so early...
"I will look over your Kingdom until you get back from your journey, but that does not mean you will abandon us or your people who follow you. You are a King now and our family, you will not abandon them or us. Do you understand?"
My father is staring daggers into my soul right now, I overlooked many things.. But I'm happy they grounded me if only a little bit, I would of eventually gotten myself killed in a pursuit of strength leaving them to defend themselves.
"T-thank you for understanding father, I wont abandon anyone I promise... I will visit you all in the Space Kingdom from time to time, but you must know this journey I have to take still."
"We understand honey, here take this"
My mother hands me a necklace with a dark black gemstone in the middle. The gemstone looks to be like a dragon chasing it's own tail, it's not in the best of shape and you can clearly see the wear and tear on it from the years... But something about it is calming me down, is it the fact I will always have something of my mothers while I journey?
"T-thank you mother I will put it on now!"
I receive the necklace and put it on, there seems to be no bonus effects but it somehow calms my nerves...
"It's an Onyx I named you after this stone for your eyes were shining the deepest black I've ever seen... Promise me you will visit this old mother of yours Onyx!"
"I promise mom..."
She immediately embraced me I can hear her silent cries, but this is something I must do... But I overlooked my spatial abilities, I will be able to visit from time to time if we have the free time... Until then mother I promise to keep you in my thoughts.
"Sophy... Abby go grab some clothes and whatever you need for the journey, I will go grab supplies in town. We will meet at the Adventurers Guild in two hours."
"Y-yes I will go right away"
Sophy bowed to me before grabbing Abby and pulling her out the door.
"See you soon master"
Abby's mischievous grin completely plasters across her face but seeing this is kind of calming, to be truthful I wanted them both to come with me... But I couldn't just ask them to follow me, that would be selfish of me... I'm glad this happened now it's only a matter of time before I get stronger.
"Everyone I'm off, thank you for coming today... For what it's worth it meant allot, but I have things I must take care of. Please understand, I love you all."
Without giving them anymore time to slow me down I exit the front door quickly closing it behind me... A new journey awaits me in my path to strength, I'm almost overwhelmed by anticipation and excitement but that quickly faded as I remembered why I'm doing this... I will protect everyone!
"Domain"
*Welcome master*
"Hello Admin we have to talk"