Monday

Today, I decided to go back at school. My health’s been recovered, and I feel assure there’s nothing weird going to happen… or that’s how it should be?

Well, I do think nothing’s going to happen today. Like unusual, right? No, the misunderstandings between me, Kagome and Kei haven’t still solve. I must do something to prevent anything from happening.

And also, the feelings I have for Kei, though it’s ambiguous but I don’t want to run away from it. All the thoughts I’ve had once must fade. The past I had with my ex-girlfriend before shouldn’t affect my decision.

Right, now… I am Kira Miyamoto. The new me living in this world. The me who exist, not as a character who supposed not to exist in the first place, but a being that has a life.

My past self, that guy, told me about my dark past. I’ve been running away this whole time, pretending to like something I hated—

“I’ll see you later,” a girl with a short hair, wearing pants and blazer speaks as she gets off the house. “Take care.” from the door, a girl wearing an apron smiles as she waves.

I passed on the house next to mine, and saw the two kissed.

I did see it. Clear as a day. But I pretend nothing really happened. I know this world is a novel between girls’ romance. Seeing such scene is kind of normal—or should I say—an eye candy for anyone who loves seeing that thing.

That’s the time I recalled my ex-girlfriend walking hand in hand with another woman. Assuming that they’re just friends, or someone she closed to, not knowing they’ve been in secret affairs behind closed doors.

Proceeding on my way to the station, I passed over the passing machine, tapping with my card and wait at the platform.

There aren’t much people right now. A few minutes passed and the train came. I got in and secured a seat not far from the door, as other passengers boarded.

“Hey.” a familiar voice calls to me.

Lifting my head, I saw the face I’ve been trying to forget. The face of the girl who changes the pace of everything. “Uhm…” I mumbled.

“Won’t you say good morning, at least? My junior?”

Her lips formed a snicker while holding on the steel handrail. The girl who I want, at least, face whenever I’m ready to see her.

“Senior Kagome…” I utter. Kagome moves a step forward and sits right beside me, occupying the space. “I’ve been worried since you got a fever, how are you feeling?”

I know she’s just concerned about me, but the way our bodies bumped to each other makes me conscious of her. “I—I’m all good now, thanks for asking…”

We try not to bother the other passengers, so I speak softly to response on her question. “That’s good to hear. I am happy that my boyfriend recovers.” that word gave a chilly feeling as I caught her eyes glaring menacingly at me.

“Huh.” that’s the only word I spoke and averts her eyes off. “Sorry for not visiting you. I’ve been busy with the practice in the club.”

“No, it’s fine. I… I…”

“Good morning—!”

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A sudden glee voice cracked on our conversation. Appearing in front is Kei with a cheery mood as she holds on the handrail.

Kei and Kagome’s eyes meet for a moment, but they divert off as Kei turns to see me. “Hi, Kira. Good morning.”

“Good—good morning, Senior Kei.” I greeted bashfully. I also noticed Kei’s face blushes a little while looking at me. Damn it. Why now? This isn’t the thing I want right now.

“Ah, Senior Kei… I’ll give my seat to you—” before I could stand, Kagome grabbed my hand. Firmly holding it, her eyes looked to me. “Stay here.”

“Huh? But Senior Kei—”

“No, it’s okay, Kira. I can sit anywhere. See you at school.” Kei wryly smiles as she left us right away.

I only watched her as she tries to look for a vacant seat. “You know what I’ve said last time, right?” Kagome whispers to me.

“Huh? Senior Kagome, I know I shouldn’t say anything about you and Senior Kei being close… so…”

“That’s not going to happen. Because I won’t let you get closer to her. You two break my heart, and you break my trust.”

Her voice filled with loathe as those words left. “I love Kei, and she loves you. Now, you say you don’t like Kei, right? Then start liking me instead. I won’t give you to her, and you two will never be together.”

Sensing her hostility, I just clammed up from my seat and nods. This isn’t what I want. I, at least, need to do something to make this right. I want Kagome to understand I never intend to hurt her.

And I also want to understand these feelings for Kei. Since that time we had, the uncertain feelings starts to grow. I must make things right between all of us.

“Senior Kagome.” I called. Although my voice is shaking, I mustered up a courage to call her name. “What is it?” she asked.

“There’s something I want to talk to you about. Are you free later?”

“Yeah, sure.” Kagome answered. It’s the only thing she said and we both became quiet. This time, I want to make things clear between us. I only want to live a normal life. And this story is between them. This is all because of me.

***

Arriving at school, I asked Kagome to go beside school grounds before our class starts. Kei didn’t know anything about this, and I want to stay it as is.

“So, what do you want to talk about…?”

With her arms crossed, Kagome asked while standing, facing me. I sense she’s really pissed off of me right now. But I can’t make any mistakes here anymore.

“It’s about the time you… you asked me to be your pretending boyfriend.” I mumbled. Directly looking to her eyes, I continued. “You’re just saying this because you’re mad at me, right?”

Kagome didn’t respond to my words. She only stares at me, as I proceed. “You see, I don’t intend to take Senior Kei to you.”

That’s right; it’s not my intention to make a bad impression to her. She and Kei are the main characters here, and I’m just a nobody suddenly popped from nowhere. “I am sincerely apologizing about what I’ve done, Senior Kagome.”

“You’re saying this to me now?” after a while, she spoke again. But there’s heaviness on those words left from her.

“No, I mean—”

“It’s okay. I know she will never look at me the way how I look at her.”

I got silent. No words left from my mouth, as my eyes keep looking at her. “What I’ve done is horrible, and whenever I think of you two getting together clumps my chest.”

Kagome added. Tears welled on her eyes. “I hate you, Kira. I hate you because the girl I love is in love with you. But I hate myself for being such a person.”

Sobs faintly heard. She wipes the tears overflowing on her eyes while trying to hold her wail. Her lips tremble. “I just loved Kei this entire time. I loved her… I adore her, and I want to be with her.”

“Is that true…?”

From behind, a sudden voice engulfed. Both me and Kagome twitched and sees the person behind the voice. “Se—senior Kei?”

“Kei…” Kagome uttered out of disbelief. Standing right now is the person, the cause of all this. “I’m asking if it’s true, Kagome?”

“I…I” she mumbled, her hands clenched tightly while trying to reaffirm her feelings. “I do love you, Kei. I love you, as a girl… I want to be your lover, and I want to spend our time together.”

Kei closes her distance with us, and now, she’s with Kagome. “Thank you, for saying that feelings for me, Kagome.”

Kei grabbed Kagome’s hands, their fingers intertwined together while looking at each other. “Thank you, for loving me… but I already liked someone.”

“I know. I know—I know but still…” that moment, Kagome can’t suppressed it anymore. She starts wailing, as Kei leaned her forehead to hers. Seeing them like this makes me feel sad as well.

Yet, this is their moment so I decided to left them and goes to my class. Getting inside the classroom, Ayase suddenly popped on the door before I could enter. “Oh,” I utter.

“Hi?” Ayase greeted, seemed troubled as she greets me. From inside the classroom is Hinako sitting, while facing both of us as her chin rested on her palm. “You go ahead first, Kira.” she offers.

“Ah, thanks…” I answered and headed inside, when she suddenly pulled the strap of my bag.

“Huh?!” I grunt out.

“Say, can we talk?” she asked. Fidgeting like something unusual occurred, Ayase utters. “Huh?”

“Please? Let’s just talk for a minute?”

My eyebrows fuzzed together while scrutinizing what Ayase wants to talk about. But since she asked, there’s no harm if I just listen to her trouble, right?