Late at night in a junkyard near Dallas, I had the yard all to myself. Earlier that morning I had walked through the junkyard and found the equipment I needed to loot. Having a computerized inventory of the things that went in and out of my junkyards gave me hints as to what might be there and usable, but without looking in person, I couldn’t really trust the odd inventories of the junkyards.
With a spider excavator that I was ready to transform away before I took to shadows, I used a grapple to clear out and find equipment I could loot and then use to make equipment to find equipment that would let me find the equipment that Hubert needed to be fully functional.
I was taking a break and eating boudin when I heard the gate opening. I shadow stepped into the cab of my excavator and turned into an owl. The chains on the junkyard main gate were being cut. Archer was breaking into the junkyard.
A woman’s voice yelled, “The blip got smaller.”
Archer shouted back, “We’re already here and it’s a long drive. Lotty, if the blip isn’t stable, then whatever it is probably won’t stay useful to Hubert. If the blip doesn’t show while I am looking for valuable scrap to at least justify the trip, then I think we can just head up to Chicago where all the solid signals are.”
I waited and watched as Lotty drove a truck with a gooseneck trailer into the junkyard. As Lotty and Archer were unloading a tractor from the back of the trailer, I slid into shadow and went to the cab of the still-running truck. There was a laptop with a beam sweeping on a map of the area. On the dashboard, there was a fast spinning cup-like arrangement on a plastic box that was connected to the laptop. Here was the detector I needed, tested, and working. I slid out of shadow. Listening and looking as an owl, as best I could with the truck’s engine still running, I decided the coast was clear so I turned into myself so I could grab the laptop and the detector.
A large blip appeared on the screen. The detector was detecting me. I unplugged and peeled the detector from the Velcro on the dashboard and unplugged the laptop’s charger from the cigarette lighter before transforming them away. Archer had a lot of weapons and odd equipment in the back of the cab. I put it all away and thought about taking the keys to the truck. Archer probably had another set of keys, so that would just immediately give my presence away. I hid and listened to them.
Lotty said, “The signal was solid for two hours this morning. We should have waited a day or two to see if it was stable.”
Archer said, “We were in Houston, so this wasn’t far off our path.”
Lotty asked, “Why are we destroying the resonate nodes instead of trapping them? A few pounds of TNT might destroy Hubert.”
Archer said, “The Sinful One is always collecting diviners. The Sinful One has a list of things that might alert the other dabblers in prophecy. Explosions are just the sort of thing they notice.
“It isn’t fair. The Sinful one asked me a lot of questions about explosives. I think he plans to use them, but he won’t let me. Not since my monitors at Hubert’s place blew up.”
Lotty, asked, “What do you think Hubert did to make such a horrible enemy?”
Archer started walking. “Let’s look for stuff we can sell to another junkyard while we talk. He wants all the old ones dead. He thinks this is the time to do it. But my guess is The Sinful One wants to eliminate anyone capable of prophecy that doesn’t belong to him. Since Hubert, if he is properly equipped, is potentially one of the big players in precognition, I think Hubert is marked for death. That’s my guess. Nice. Someone kindly loaded a truck with clean aluminum scrap. Tell you what, we load up with all this copper and then I’ll hot-wire the truck. We’ll hide the new truck and the copper in the barn near Texarkana and in fifty years when everyone has forgotten the theft, we’ll sell the scrap and the antique truck.”
Lotty said, “We need to sell a little soon. We’re getting low on liquid cash, and you refuse to use your backup supplies.”
Archer said, “Since we are making an obvious robbery, I might as well empty the safe and registers. It’ll be chump change, but since the alarms have been shut off, I might as well be thorough.”
I waited until Archer had set up to cut into the safe before I set off the remote alarms. There was no point in setting off the alarms in the yard. I made sure the cameras had sent a good image of Lotty, Archer, and their truck’s license plate before leaving.
#
I summoned Caerwyn and he brought me to his room in the mansion across the road from Mr. Huberts. “Caerwyn, do you need help packing?”
Caerwyn said, “No, I still need to decide what to trash, what to donate, what to store, and what to take with me to Fairy or wherever Mom decides to take us.
“A lot of this stuff will be useless in five years, probably sooner, so I might as well give some gear to people who have been helpful online.
I sat and opened up my computer. “I got Archer’s current laptop and one of his detectors. It has crazy range. It can detect resonate gear half way across the continent.”
Caerwyn said, “Let’s go somewhere safe to analyze his laptop. He might have it rigged to blow. He probably did. I know a couple of boys who are experts in that sort of thing. You might enjoy jamming with them. If anyone can help us safely manage Archer’s laptop, it would be Jet and Jasper. Since you play and have something that might blow up, I think they’ll be interested in meeting you.”
Caerwyn tried summoning them a few times without any luck. “Sorry, Phil. They could be working with explosives and not want an interruption, or they could be rocking to loud music. Let’s wait a bit. While I sort through stuff, tell me what happened at the junkyard.”
I pulled up images of the junkyard and gestured for Caerwyn to look over my shoulder. “So I looked up all of my junkyards’ recent inventory additions to try and find stuff to loot for detectors. Dallas had the best chances, so I went there looking for stuff to loot for parts. When I showed up there, I became an obvious blip on Archer’s scanner.
“So not even knowing that I had been located, I spent a few hours looking for parts, and then I warned the staff that I would be rummaging around later after they closed. I had just recovered most of the stuff we needed and was taking a break before leaving when Archer showed up and broke into the lot.
“He was in Houston this morning, saw the blip caused by my being in Dallas and decided to come and destroy whatever caused the blip. When I showed up again in the evening, the blip appeared again so, he broke into the yard. My junkyards, network security needs to be updated, ‘cause Archer managed to take it down while he was driving to Dallas.”
Caerwyn held up a gaming console. “Do you think this is going to be safe in your Fairyland? Some Fairylands have had some pretty bad internal wars after video games were introduced. At least that’s what they say online.”
I shook my head. “Let’s not bring in anything you can’t secure with a good password.”
Caerwyn nodded.
I continued, “So he was going to grab compacted bundles of copper and a truck full of aluminum scrap. While he was breaking into the safe, I set off the alarms.”
Caerwyn said, “You need to get better at the dirty tricks. When the cops pull him over, the odds are that a few cops are going to be killed. Kind of rough on their families. Even unarmed, Archer isn’t going to be taken in and arrested by the cops. Having his picture posted might get a Death interested, but the odds are they’ll come after you for posting it instead of going after Archer for commiting a crime. Let me log in and help you shut down any posting of Archer’s pictures. Then we put it out on the dark web where the immortals post things. What did Hubert do to make Archer go on a nationwide search to kill him?”
I shrugged. “He mentioned a fellow called ‘The Sinful One.’ Apparently the Sinful One wants to eliminate immortals, but those capable of prophecy he really wants to eliminate.”
Caerwyn asked, “Hubert does prophecy?”
I nodded. “When he has the right gear with the right resonance. I really don’t know what he needs that way.”
Caerwyn sat down at his computer and started searching. “I got a book by Fritz Leiber and a book by Edwina Mark. The next interesting link related to The Sinful One is to the Branch Davidians in Waco. I would ignore it, except Archer was in Houston and Dallas. It’s still a pretty thin link and not the same name. I think trying to google The Sinful One is going to be waste. If Archer is working with this guy and he fears prophecy, we may be able to find out from someone else. Let me check on Jet and Jasper again.
Caerwyn did a few more summons and then asked, “Jasper, do you want to meet a wild Louisiana backwoods style percussionist?”
Caerwyn looked at me. “I think we got him hooked.
“Yeah, he’s hep, Fairy king and Goblin cred. How hep do you want?”
Caerwyn folded his laptop and held out his hand. “We got him interested. Let’s go to Kent.”
I put my laptop away and took his hand.
In a sound studio, two solid-looking identical twin Daemons were holding electric guitars. A elderly Goblin with a coronet nodded to me.
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Another old Goblin gestured to me with his harmonica. “You a Goblin?”
I felt my ear. “Been called one before.”
The Goblin with the coronet said to one of the Daemon, “Jet, neither of them brought instruments, and I thought we were here to play. If we have to wait an hour for you to show off your collection, I’m out of here.”
Jet said, “Milk Paint here does beat box, and he said this guy was a wild Louisiana backwoods style percussionist. Let’s see what they do first.”
I looked at Caerwyn and the nickname sort of made sense, what with his brown eyes and albino skin. “Milk Paint?”
Caerwyn said, “When you do scat, you just hope for a kind nickname.”
I turned into me with my old crate and sat down on it. I decided to beat a rhythm that I had only shared with mosquitoes and alligators. It had beats to it, but it shifted speed and made a mess of counter rhythms. Something I had improvised and sang my questions to after my second family left and the old man died, and I had just gotten a cajon that could speak for me.
They asked for wild, so I gave it to them. Caerwyn went to a mike and started weaving in effects while holding his hands around his mouth. I looked at Caerwyn. He had heard me play this before. I don’t see how he managed it, but he’d been watching me longer than I had suspected.
The old man with the harmonica started in with a sort of train chugging sound and long lonely notes. The coronet took those lonely train sounds and magnified them. Jet came in with his bass guitar finding a melody inside my percussion and then the other Daemon, who I assumed was Jasper, changed it into a song. His song wasn’t that far off from what I would sing in my lament and outrage so maybe some of the songs inside us are universal.
This was a band I never expected to hear and never imagined would join together and play. One by one, they faded out and I kept playing for a few minutes longer.
The old Goblin with the harmonica said, “I’m Roy, the other geezer is Skins. Wild Boy, if you see us playing, anytime, and anywhere, just get out your box and join us. We play a lot of set pieces, but we love it when they turn to chaos and we see new directions in old tunes.”
Jet said, “Not so fast, Wild Boy came to see us, we got first claim on him and Milk Paint for our band. Jasper, what’s our band called?”
Jasper asked, “Do you sing, Wild Boy?”
Caerwyn said, “He sings great, but almost never in front of folk.”
I gave Caerwyn a side eye. “You’re spooking me, Milk Paint.”
Caerwyn smiled. “I don’t get out much. Over-protective mom thing. So I have to live vicariously through others.”
I stood and turned my box over. I examined the inside closely and found the transmitter Caerwyn had managed to put in it. Probably about the time I first delivered a fish to Hubert. I left it there, but I made a mental note to check my newer cajon and make sure one of the two didn’t have a bug in it.
Jasper said, “Wild Boy and the Gators. But we can’t go on tour. Milk Paint has too distinctive a look to ever dare get famous. Too long staying young and looking like that means we are a studio group only.”
Jet said, “That’s sadly one of the pains of immortality. We don’t dare do much more than backup music, and even then we have to use an alias for the album credits.”
Jasper said, “Yeah, tellin’ folk you’re really big in Fairy is only a little bit better than bragging your mom thinks your cool.”
Roy said, “That was fun, boys. Let’s do it again soon. I have to get some rest.” He looked at Jet and Jasper, “Some of us have to work for a living.”
Jet said, “Yeah, being a landlord to shipping companies sure keeps you poor.”
Roy looked back at them as he walked out.
Skins said, “So, Wild Boy, what name should I summon you with?”
Caerwyn said, “Phil, King of Snipsnort is what he answers to.”
Jasper laughed. “Man, Milk Paint, you slam the beat box, and they don’t even ask your name. You’re welcome to play with Jet and me anytime.”
Skins says, “Sorry, but I usually play in front of a small audience, and they aren’t always savvy. After a couple of times seeing a Daemon jump someone for holding up their cell phone, I started avoiding inviting Daemons. For a distinctive looking one, that would go double.
“I liked playing with you, Milk Paint, but even among the Goblins there are those that avoid Daemons.”
Jet said, “So that’s why you don’t invite us.”
Skins shook his head. “Love playing with you, but your reputation makes a lot of Goblins decide to slip into the dark.”
Skins got up. “Same time next week?”
Jasper said, “Sure, if our egos recover by then.”
Skins walked out and Jasper asked, “What next?”
Caerwyn said, “You remember Nimrod from the Sons of Giants tech forum?”
Jet said, “Kind of a jerk, as I recall.”
Caerwyn nodded. “He tried to kill Phil. Phil has his laptop in another of his forms, and we would like to check it out without having it blow up.”
Jet and Jasper exchanged a look.
Jet said, “You came to the right place, but that isn’t all that easy.”
Jasper said, “Wasn’t Nimrod the fellow who always bragged about his weapons?”
Jet said, “Yeah, someone would describe an idea, and Nimrod would say he made it a couple hundred years earlier and why it wasn’t all that good. He never posted any proof, so we all ignored him.”
I said, “I have a collection of his weapons in other forms, but now I am worried that if I transform and bring out his weapons, they might blow up on me.”
Caerwyn said, “You didn’t mention his weapons.”
I shook my head. “Kind of forgot about them till now.”
Jet says, “You think Emmy would be interested?”
Jasper said, “A new weapon, duh. Just the sort of thing our sister loves.”
Jet said, “We have access to a world where time can be stepped in fine increments, and you can easily be isolated from things you are holding. Hundreds of overlapping gateways to take off explosions, separate detonators from explosives, and that sort of thing.
“But we need a serious operator to run it. For the most part, you go there, wait a few weeks frozen in time, and then someone who can manage it will show up and deal with things.”
Jasper said, “Mostly, you just get separated from the explosives, and it all goes boom. We have other simpler worlds that do a great job if you are fast and just drop the explosives, but if you want to examine the stuff, you gotta go to this one and get one of the good operators. Our sister Emmy is one of the best.”
I thought about this. I didn’t know either of these Daemons. At the same time, I didn’t like the thought of having explosives ready to blow up if I changed to the wrong form.
I smiled. “Let’s do it.”
They took us through a gateway to a Fairyland library. Jasper took a book from the table in the center, closed it, and looked at the spine. He moved some stairs set in tracks around and put the book up. Then he got down from the stair and pulled out another book and flipped pages before opening the book and activating the gateway.
We stepped into a ball-shaped chamber with glowing-blue grid marks on the walls. We were floating in the center.
Jet said, “Phil, identify yourself.”
I said, “Phil, King of Snipsnort.”
Jet said, “Control, take all but Phil to the controls layer.”
I could still see them, but they were almost like illusions. Caerwyn, Jet, and Jasper were all standing with gravity while I was floating, so they were in a different Fairyland but overlapped with this one.
Jasper said, “Queen Emerald, your brother Jasper summons thee. We have weapons that might blow up and need your assistance.”
A tall, graceful, beautiful Daemon appeared beside them.
The Queen of Shadows looked at me and said, “The Fates were right. You do seem to get around.”
Jasper asked, “How many forms have potential explosives in them?”
I answered, “Three. I have a detector and a laptop in one form, and I have weapons split between two others.”
The Queen of Shadows said, “Laptop first. Phil, give us a moment, and when the lines marking the walls change from blue to red, transform to the form with the laptop.”
The grid marks on the walls changed to red, and I turned into me with the laptop and detector except the laptop and detector were gone. Caerwyn, the Queen of Shadows, Jet, and Jasper had all moved to new positions. Caerwyn was holding the detector. The grid marks changed and were glowing blue again.
The Queen of Shadows said, “Now when the lines turn red, transform to the form with the first set of weapons.”
The lines turned red so I transformed. The weapons were gone. The line turned back to blue, and I had to crane my neck to see the others gathered around a table with the weapons on it. I was slowly drifting at a different angle and had to resist an urge to throw up.
The Queen of Shadows said, “Okay, on red the next set of weapons.”
The lines changed to red so I transformed. Again, the weapons were gone, and now I was spinning the other way. The lines were blue, and they were looking at the weapons.
#
I threw up in my mouth, so I took myself to the barren world of death and spit it out in one of the circle grooves I had dug with the excavator. Then I threw up again. I changed into another me and sat on the hard sandy ground and summoned Caerwyn. He didn’t answer. I took myself to the seven-way crossroads in Snipsnort and lay down on the ground. I sped time up a lot.
From behind me, someone cleared their throat.
It was the one of the ladies that sort of forced me to make the bridge to Nowhere.
She curtsied. “Long live King Snipsnort.”
I lay my head back and closed my eyes. “Please rise.”
She said, “Sad that we so displease our King that he hires outside labor.”
I said. “Fine, I abdicate. Someone else can manage things. I don’t have money to hire anyone. If you’d thank the folk that fed me at Bogview Castle, I would be grateful. Sorry if I offended anyone.”
She said, “You can just command folk.”
I asked, “Nope, not thy king anymore. Never really liked the job and everyone here got along fine without me. It’ll take me a bit to move, but I have another Fairyland that I think can set up a house for me and my friends in.”
She said, “You can’t just leave.”
I said, “Yeah, I have a little sister to take care of, but she can visit. Just because I abdicated doesn’t mean I won’t visit my little sister, Duchess Byebye.”
The woman shouted, “Shortstrop, we have an emergency.”
I opened my eyes for a moment. Despite a wave of dizziness, I saw Mrs. Shortstrop step out from behind a column, narrow her eyes, and shake her head at the woman near me.
I closed my eyes again and relaxed my neck. “Drop the fiction, you are both part of the woman’s group that manages the things the men’s group doesn’t and you have been managing things pretty well without me. Look, it didn’t work out. I never really felt comfortable here, and I think I have left things better than when I came. I’ll take all the steel and gizmos when I go, so no one has to worry much. Just give me a while. Sorry about running out on all of you, but I’m feeling sick again, need something to drink, and probably should rest before I eat anything.
“Before you go on about my dishonoring, everyone consider how much honor you have by having a pauper as a king. Next time you get a king, maybe you can be ready for one.”
I slipped into shadows and went to a tall tree where I could sit on a limb and get a drink without sharing the little I had in a backpack or being rude and not sharing. I greedily thought about how much back pay a laborer would be owed for making a long bridge and updating several roads.
As I thought about how to get payment, Lord Loadstone summoned me.
“I abdicated. Next time just summon Phil the Fishmonger.”
Lord Loadstone asked, “Really, you have abdicated?”
I said, “Yep. About the manor house that we have been expanding—”
Lord Loadstone asked, “The one above Leidingstad?”
I said, “I’m thinking of taking it with all the steel to another Fairyland as payment for the stuff I built. I can rebuild the manor house close to the original, probably a bit improved.”
Lord Loadstone asked, “Sire, can you bring me through to where you are?”
I said, “No, I’m drinking and eating, and since I can’t really buy anything here I would rather not be rude and eat in front of you and I’d rather not share. I’m nearly sick from hunger and need some rest so I going to end this conversation.”
I sat in the tree and then it dawned on me how much of a nightmare I was in for. From the little I had learned, most Fairy kings are colossal jerks, and they would have just killed folk that didn’t give them what they wanted. Odds were good that I was about to get all sorts of embarrassing attention.
While sick with hunger and thirst and general illness, what had seemed logical now seemed like I maybe went too far, but at the same time, I didn’t want to go hunting for whoever didn’t exist to pay the king because they had never paid one before and never considered it. I didn’t want to negotiate, demand or threaten anyone. I wanted rest and I wanted food, but it all made me nauseous to think about. I needed something to drink.
Lord Loadstone summoned me again. “King Snipsnort, you should come to me. We have food and drink here at Bogview Castle.”
I accepted the summons.