I waited for Cecil to be alone, and then teleported into the room where he could see me.

"Another Docbot? Or the real thing?" Cecil asked.

"Real enough," I said. "Nolan killed my original body, but I had vat-grown clones as backup."

Cecil grunted. "So it was Nolan. I had my suspicions, but..."

"I need him to think I am still dead," I said. "And... in fact, I need him to think Karasuba is dead, too."

"Any survivors are likely to remember it was him they survived," Cecil said, nodding. "Even if we tell him your memory backup wasn't fresh enough, or that Karasuba got brain-damaged and doesn't remember what happened... well, he'll have his doubts."

I nodded.

"So," Cecil continued, a scowl settling on his face. "I don't suppose you'd be willing to share the rest of your insight with me, now that you've realized you can't do this alone?"

I sighed.

"I should've just told you," I said quietly. "Thought I could handle it on my own, that it'd be easy. But, well. I'm in the big leagues, now, and nothing here is easy."

"Glad you've finally caught up," Cecil said. "Now, if you'll catch me up?"

"Nolan killed the Guardians of the Globe as a ploy to render Earth dependent on Viltrumites for protection, opening the door to subjugation under the Empire of Viltrum," I said. "Everything he told you about Viltrumite benevolence and charity was a lie. They help their subjects for two reasons: one, so that those subjects can become more valuable, and two, so that their subjects have fewer 'excuses' for resisting Viltrumite subjugation."

Cecil actually blinked a little as he drank that in.

"Karasuba is technically also a Viltrumite, but only in body; she was born as a different kind of human-like alien in our original universe," I continued. "But when we came to this universe, she was reborn as a cloned Viltrumite- something the existing Viltrumites regard with disgust as an abomination. They'll be hunting her, and..." I sighed. "Well, that's another reason to tell Nolan she's dead- if he knew she survived, there's a risk Nolan'll find out about her genetics, and try to kill her again."

"And just so we're on the same page, being a Viltrumite hasn't made her loyal to the Empire?" Cecil asked.

"It has not," I said. "Her cape name, Thronebreaker, comes from the fact that she aspires to break the back of Viltrum's imperial power."

"Good," Cecil said. "What ideas do you have so far for winning the next fight with Nolan?"

"Mostly bad ones," I admitted. "Stuff that I already know either won't work, or will have unacceptable collateral damage. I'll need some time in the lab to work out something that'll actually work."

"We might not have much of that," Cecil said. "You have any other assets that could help?"

"...I've got my own intelligence agency," I admitted. "They're called the Red Hand, and every last one of them has a standardized and broad suite of superpowers, although none of them are of sufficient destructive power to meaningfully hurt Nolan."

"Hrm." Cecil grunted. "How cooperative are you feeling?"

"I'll assign a task force to work under you," I said. "They'll share some useful technology, but I'll be making that useful technology public knowledge before I leave, so don't expect any permanent edge from me."

Cecil grunted again. "Well, it's better than nothing. I take it you brought them with you, rather than finding them while you were here?

"I've mentioned, at some point, that I've got a pocket dimension attached to me," I said. "The part I left out is that it's big enough to fit an entire galaxy inside. That is where the Red Hand lives... well, kinda. There's layers, but honestly, it doesn't matter. I have a pocket dimension where I keep my psychic ninjas."

"Psychic?" Cecil asked, looking a little perturbed.

"...I'm gonna just savor this moment on behalf of everyone who's ever met you and thought there'd never be a day when you got squeamish about something."

"Fuck you," Cecil said without any real feeling behind it.

"Anyhow, I've got an idea for what to do next, but it might be a touch unpalatable."

"Yeah, welcome to my life," Cecil said dryly. "I don't like it here either, but someone has to live it. What's your bright idea?"

"Build a deliberately bad Guardians of the Globe 2.0 team," I said. "One that makes Nolan think he really did kill all our best heroes, and we're stuck scraping the bottom of the barrel and hoping either he or his son can handle everything the B-Team misses. Meanwhile, quietly, we'll hire on some actually good heroes to be... independent operators, on retainer. Just working in the background."

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"Making sure things don't get too bad," Cecil said, nodding appreciatively. "And meanwhile, since all Nolan is hearing from us is that the new Guardians suck and we need him recovered and back in the field ASAP, he thinks his plan worked. Right up until he finds out about the heroes we've been hiding from him, of course."

"We don't want to underestimate him," I said. "But I think... if we don't let anyone know, not even the hidden heroes, that they work for the Global Defense Agency... then I think Nolan won't connect those dots, even if he sees one of 'em hand Godzilla its own radioactive ass. He might just think it's a fluke."

"I'll tell him to be on the lookout for up-and-comers and point them my way," Cecil said. "That way he'll think I don't know about them, and focus on keeping it that way."

"Could backfire," I said. "He might just kill 'em instead. Risky."

"Point," Cecil said. "We'll figure something out."

"For all our sakes, I sure fucking hope so," I said. "Shit, before I forget- Nolan's an author in his civilian life, right? Have someone read his old adventure books. They're based on his experience as a Viltrumite soldier, and they're barely-fictionalized accounts of all the shit out there that can threaten a Viltrumite. All that shit is stuff that the Viltrumites managed to overcome, of course, but..." I shrugged. "Well, just because we have plenty of stories about people surviving gunshots doesn't mean guns aren't real good at killing people dead."

Cecil nodded. "Alright. I'll see what we can dig up. Don't know what good it'll do to us on Earth, since everything's probably going to be off in deep space, but we'll see. Keep me updated on what you're doing, too."

"There's a lot of it," I warned him. "How much time do you have?"

"Enough." He sighed. "Not right now, though. I'll leave you be for now; gotta go talk to the Graysons, and pretend we didn't just have this conversation."

"Good luck," I said quietly as he left, and returned my attention to Karasuba.

She was barely recognizable at this point. Her eyes were swollen shut. Her nose was broken in several places, as was her jaw. Her skin was raw, shredded, and bruised.

I closed my eyes, and remembered the sight of Nolan's face- bruised and bloodied, swollen in a few places. He'd gotten beaten up pretty bad.

I swore to a god I rarely prayed to, that if he gave me the strength to do so, I would use it to wipe the stain of Nolan Grayson from this earth.

I heard nothing in response.

Adonai never answered my prayers.

But then, perhaps he didn't need to. The gears of my mind began to turn.

Nolan Grayson would bleed for what he did. Not just to Karasuba. But to Red Rush. To Darkwing. To Green Ghost, to War Woman, to Martian Man, to Aquarus, to Immortal...

I blinked.

To Immortal.

----------------------------------------

One of the benefits of people thinking you're dead is that you don't have to show up to a funeral. I didn't even have to bother making a fake Karasuba to go in the coffin; it was closed casket, on account of her injuries, so that coffin just had some sandbags in it to make it feel like she was in there.

"You're sure this'll work?" Cecil asked.

Cecil had insisted on being present for this, for some reason. Apparently, when your intuition demanded a third empty casket, Cecil felt the need to be personally present.

"Very confident, yes," I said. "Even if it doesn't, though..." I shrugged, tugging the needle taut. "What are we losing, here, besides our time?"

"That's still pretty valuable," Cecil said. "And I'm not sure I trust that needlework- are you sure you're a doctor?"

"If she's ever done a residency, I've never heard about it," Karasuba quipped. She'd recovered pretty quickly, between her Body Mod's Regeneration Perk and the regeneration-focused Perk she'd taken for this Jump specifically. "There's a reason she's not my doctor."

I finished reattaching Immortal's head, and glanced down at his chest, which had been torn through much like Karasuba's, except apparently even that hadn't been enough to put him all the way down. Considering that...

...eh. He'd live.

"My PhD is in Genetics, not Trauma Surgery or Funeral Direction," I said, attaching alligator cables to Immortal's body and stepping back. "Put on your safety goggles; this might get messy."

I grabbed the high-current knife switch standing between Immortal and one point twenty one gigawatts of power- well okay not that exact amount, but- and braced myself, before throwing it closed.

Immortal twitched.

Immortal jerked.

Immortal's heart beat once. Then twice. And then...

"Omni-maaaaaan!" Immortal yelled, wrestling himself upright.

"Immortal!" I yelled back.

"I- Ophiuchus! But you- Omni-man-"

"I'm a clone," I said. "It's a long story. But... I know about Omni-Man."

Immortal nodded, wordlessly.

"We need to be smart about this," I warned him. "We tried fighting him already, and that didn't work. We need to stack the odds in our favor before we try fighting him again. Do you understand me?"

"I... he... He killed your wife," Immortal said.

"I'm still alive," Karasuba said dryly, freaking the shit out of Immortal. "I healed a lot stronger than before, in fact. And you know what? Even with that one ace in the hole, we're still not sure of our chances."

"So tell me, Immortal," Cecil added, folding his arms. "You wanna go for Round Two with just the high card? Or do you maybe wanna get your ducks in a row, and make sure you're holding a royal flush when the showdown comes?"

"Because if you do rush off half-cocked," I added, "Nolan's just gonna kill you again."

Immortal closed his eyes, wearily, and sighed.

"I don't really have a choice, do I?" he asked quietly.

"Not really," I said. "But trust me: you want a shot at Nolan? So do we. And when the time comes? We'll all get it."

Immortal nodded, grimly satisfied.

"Oh, and, you're gonna need a haircut," I added. "As far as everyone outside this room knows? You're still dead. And it needs to stay that way."

He grimaced.