"Good news, Apprentice!" Zash said giddily.
"Your larynx is healed?" I asked, looking up from my dataslate. Reading wasn't actually all that common in the Sith Empire, which would've surprised Old Rose; literacy mainly occurred in technical fields, as a vocational skill for diagnosing machinery. That said, there were still things to read that weren't technical manuals, and I'd always had a taste for adventure stories; after all, just about anyone who worked on a starship had to be literate, and sometimes, they realized that being able to read meant they were also able to write.
Oh, sure, sometimes what they wrote were straightforward travelogues, and helpful guides for getting past customs in various jurisdictions. But other times, they embellished, and told stories to entertain, like they were in a bar where they didn't want to pay for their drinks, except now the crowd of barflies technically included the entire galaxy.
"Well, yes," Zash allowed. "But, also, I've just received word from Darth Mortis!" She pulled out her communicator, and hit play on the recording.
"Given the evidence, I find Lord Zash innocent in the death of Darth Skotia," Darth Mortis said. "Furthermore, given her noted expertise, I hereby promote her to Darth Zash, taking Skotia's place, effective immediately." The recording then continued for another second, just long enough to capture the beginning of Thanaton making very angry noises, before cutting off completely.
"Congratulations, Darth Zash," I said, grinning at her. "How do you intend to celebrate?"
"Oh, you know," Zash said, waving dismissively. "Handing out very expensive gifts to my supporters to maintain their loyalty. Now that I'm a Darth, I can not only give you a ship, I can give you a nicer ship than I have."
"That's something," I said, nodding.
"If you have a wish-list of features, now is the time to share it," Zash continued.
"Well, as it just so happens," I began, swiping over to another document on my dataslate.
"You really are prepared for everything," Zash remarked. "I'm impressed, Apprentice, truly."
"You are aware that my name is Rose, correct?" I asked, before turning around the dataslate to show her the wishlist I'd been drawing up for the ship I had been planning to commission, once I had the credits for it.
"I know everything," Zash said idly, scanning over the list. "Interesting, interesting. I see what you're going for, and I like it. Very useful, and very inconspicuous."
"Eyup," I said, nodding. "Disguise it as a small mining vessel, and suddenly the turbolasers, the special hull, and the fabrication facilities all look perfectly innocuous."
"Well, Rose," Zash said, pouring indulgence into the simple way she said my name, "I do believe I can have this built for you."
"You're the best," I said, grinning.
"It'll take but a week to have it ready," Zash continued. "Your disguise idea was so close to the truth that I can have an actual mining vessel be retrofitted to these specifications in short order. In the meantime, you're free to do as you wish. Once your ship is ready, however..." She sighed. "Well, it'll be back to work, for you."
I shrugged. "I'll live."
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"Rose and Ffon reporting in from aboard the Century Eagle," I said, once we arrived at our destination and landed. The mining vessel had already been named when Zash requisitioned it, and I hadn't bothered to change the name. It sounded perfectly unexceptional, and anything I'd come up with would sound like something a Sith would name their ship- on account that, well, it would be what a Sith would name their ship. "Shakedown cruise complete; we have landed on Balmorra. No issues detected, and awaiting further orders."
"Excellent," Zash said. "Now, as it so happens, we are in fact searching for the artifacts of an ancient Sith Lord, and I have actually traced one of them to Balmorra. There is, fortunately, already an Imperial presence on Balmorra- simply speak to Major Bessiker, and he should be able to point you in the right direction."
"Got it," I said, nodding. "Anything else?"
"You should be able to feel the artifact when you get close," Zash said. "It is strong with the Dark Side. Otherwise... Dismissed."
I hung up, and sighed as I unbuckled myself from the pilot's chair.
"C'mon, Ffon," I said. "We've got an artifact to dig up."
"I'm going to hate this," Ffon said, grumbling.
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"I was wrong," Ffon remarked, as I levitated the artifact out of the pit of toxic sludge it'd been dropped into.
"Taking a colicoid mutagen to survive the toxic sludge," I said, shaking my head. "Ridiculous! I'm a doctor of genetics, Ffon- if we had three years, I could teach you everything you needed to know to understand precisely why that wouldn't work. Besides, we're Sith. Lightning is hardly the only thing we can do with the Force." I dropped the artifact back into the sludge. "Now, you try it."
"...Why would you..." Ffon began.
"You need to practice your Force abilities, Ffon," I chided him. "You can't just expect them to be masterful, you have to actually master them. Now, levitate that artifact back out of the sludge."
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"The next artifact is on Nar Shadaa, in the possession of a minor Sith Lord who retreated from Imperial politics," Zash said. "Now, ordinarily, I'd suggest you simply kill him for it, but..."
"But, I've already come up with a workable plan for this sort of scenario," I said, pulling out the broken lightsaber that I'd been idly considering repairing and giving to Ffon.
Oh well, he'd live.
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"See?" I said to Ffon as we walked out with the artifact. "Not everything we Sith do has to be soaked in blood and domination."
"Call your cowardice whatever you like," Ffon said. "So long as you aren't inflicting menial drudgery on me, I care not."
"Well, someone just earned himself fifty pushups when we get back to the ship."
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Ffon and I were crossing blades- well, training blades, but still- quite frequently, now. Our quest through the galaxy for these strange stone pieces Zash wanted so badly left us with plenty of time, and I had felt it appropriate to spend that time training my apprentice.
Because, well, that's what Ffon really was, to me. An apprentice. I didn't really need a minion; anything Ffon could do, I could do better and faster, with less backsass. But, well... It would be weird to tell Zash I wanted an apprentice, when I was still her apprentice, and even now had only been such for, what, four months?
Ffon exploited the opening I left for him, and landed a single blow on my bicep.
"Good, good," I said, smirking at him as we drew back. "Your power grows, young Sith. Do not neglect your exercises, if you wish it to keep growing."
He rolled his eyes. "Yes, Darth Rose." He tossed his training saber to the side, and trod back to his room.
I shrugged. He was a work in progress.
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"Stop right there, Sith," a self-righteous voice proclaimed. "Your wretched machinations end h-"
"Child, for the love of the Force," I snapped.
My time on Alderaan had been uniquely frustrating, with Alderaan having so fucking many political factions vying for control, and the Empire backing some of them, and all of them hating each other and having a tangled web of jurisdictions to navigate.
"Do you have any fucking idea," I continued, "just how dangerous it is to simply leave a Dark Side artifact lying around like this?! I am relocating this thing for the good of everyone who likes living on this planet, and if you intend to stop me, then I begin to doubt just how civic-minded you Jedi really are!"
"Locked in a vault is-" the Jedi began.
"This thing is strong enough to be felt from across the planet, Jedi!" I said. "Please, for your sake, if nobody else's, let me get rid of this thing for you."
And then I poured on the Mind Trick with enough raw oomph to overcome even a Jedi.
"...Alright," the Jedi said quietly, flicking off his lightsaber. "Go. Quickly."
I can't believe that worked.
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"I'm pretty sure you didn't need to kill that guy," I remarked, as we returned to the ship.
"That Sith disrespected you," Ffon said. "If I'm to be tied to you, then I can't let your honor be so casually besmirched."
"Very faithful, Apprentice," I said. "However, that was also the Sith in charge of the Imperial presence on Alderaan."
"...Ah."
"Someone might have questions for us, if we aren't gone quickly enough."
"Let's get going, then."
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"It's been a hell of a trip," I said, once we landed on Dromund Kaas.
"It has," Ffon agreed.
It'd been the better part of a year while we hunted down Tulak Hord's missing artifacts, and in that time, Ffon had grown stronger, in flesh, mind, and spirit. I'd pushed him more than he initially liked, but now... well, now, he was a proud, capable Sith Lord in all but name.
"I'll admit," Ffon continued, as we made our way out of Kaas City, to the ruined temple where Zash wanted to meet us. "At first, I hated you."
"I'm aware," I said dryly.
"Your behavior was full of things I'd been taught were signs of weakness," Ffon continued. "But, well, with time, and a new perspective..." And some wildly heretical Light Side training that he wasn't educated enough to realize were heretical Light Side techniques, and simply thought were Sith Secrets he had to keep hidden for normal, non-heretical reasons. "...I've come around, Master Rose."
"Well, hell," I said, shrugging as we walked through the ruins of the temple's front gate. "I guess now's as good a time as any."
"For what?" Ffon asked as I reached into my pocket.
"Here, Apprentice," I said, handing Ffon a lightsaber. "It takes Imperial blaster batteries, so keep some charged spares on you."
Ffon accepted the lightsaber gingerly; it was a very traditional design, made almost entirely out of a single lathed metal part, with the two non-lathed flourishes being a discreet knob near the pommel to hook onto a belt holster- which was actually currently attached to the knob- and the power switch.
Of course, if any Sith didn't need a lightsaber, it was Ffon; back on Alderaan, I'd watched him kill a fully-fledged Sith Lord with his bare hands. Still, he deserved one, and I had the means to make them, so...
"...Thank you," he said, genuinely. He closed his eyes, and affixed the belt holster to his belt. "Now. Let's go see what your master wants, eh?"
"Let's," I agreed, and led us deeper into the temple, towards the crumbling, disused ritual chamber. "Zash!" I called out. "I have the final artifact!"
"Ah, Apprentice, excellent work!" Zash said, before turning around, revealing a face that should've belonged to someone truly ancient, and not a Sith Lord who I'd thought was about my age. "Ahhh, and you even brought your minion, how wonderful! I do hope you haven't gotten too attached."
"Ah, ffuck," Ffon whispered.