Somehow Dalton had fallen into an underground pool. Rocks and bits of the school fell into the pool and missed him.

When Dalton broke the surface of the water, he was met with Malcolm’s outstretched hand.

He took his hand.

“That was something wasn’t it?” Malcolm smiled.

“Yeah, it was.” Dalton had been pulled out and was shaking. He gazed at Malcolm’s bare chest. “Say, when did you strip?”

He rose his head proudly. “It’s one of my skills. Stripping! It allows me to strip my clothes.”

Dalton leaned in expectantly. “Could it be a substation technique? I’ve heard of the substitution techniques allowing you to teleport a specific distance.”

“What? No. It just turns my clothes other than my magic underwear into confetti. See.”

Dalton followed his finger, seeing bits of clothes float in the water, along with a big spot of blood in the water. Dalton turned back to Malcolm and rounded behind him to see a giant cone shaped rock stabbed in his back. Dalton followed the flow of blood and finally noticed that red puddle underneath.

“How are you not dead?”

Yet, he put his hands on his hips and laughed. “My magic underwear protected me from harm.”

“No, no. You have a giant rock stabbing you in the back. You’re losing a lot of blood.”

“You have a rock stabbing you in the back!” Malcolm snapped back.

“Malcolm. I’m not joking. You really have a giant triangle shaped rock stabbing your back.”

“Yeah, I know.”

Dalton blinked furiously. “If you do, then why aren’t you freaking out?”

“Did you not hear anything. My magic underwear has protected me from harm.”

He suddenly coughed a glob of blood the size of a fist. He swept it behind a rock with his foot.

“As I said, I have never felt better. I’m perfectly fine.”

Dalton took in a breath, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Okay, let’s say you are alright. Go ahead and walk forward for me.”

“I’m okay.”

“Yes. I understand, please take a step towards me.” Dalton flitted his fingers towards him. “Just one step.”

“Well, if you insist.” He rose his foot, and then put it back on the ground where it had been just a moment ago. “See, what did I tell you.”

“You did none of that!” Dalton yelled.

“Why are you getting angry? Don’t we have better things to do, like getting out of here?”

“Normally I would agree, but I don’t get why you’re acting like you got a little scrap on your back, when you’re clearly bleeding to death.”

You might be reading a pirated copy. Look for the official release to support the author.

“Bleeding to death.” Malcolm snickered. “It’s just a flesh wound.”

A rock the size of Dalton’s head dropped and struck the cone in Malcolm’s back like a hammer. The cone broke through his chest.

There was a heavy silence as the two stared at the crimson pointy tip.

“How are you not dead?” Dalton asked once more.

Malcolm opened his mouth to answer. Blood bubbles boiled with every word he spoke. Then he fell face down on the ground.

Dalton got the feeling that Malcolm was going to die. Now, he did not like the man one bit. However, he saved him from Ozul or Zulo or Jello or whatever his name was now. For that, he wanted to reciprocate.

He crouched right next to Malcolm and turned him on his side. Malcolm looked up at Dalton.

“Say, I think I might be dying.”

He gave the underwear model a curt stare. In another life, he would be exasperated at this man’s stupidity.

“Yes.” He simply confirmed it. “Do you have any potions on you?”

He swallowed. “No, but you can get one.” He motioned to his underwear. “Just put your hand in my underwear, and you might have a chance to get one.”

“Okay, we’re going to have to find some potions.” Dalton looked around the area. He couldn’t see where exactly he ended up, but by the tiles, they may have landed in a bath.

“No, I’m being serious.” Malcolm’s head was bobbing back and forth. His eyes were barely open. “My underwear can connect to anywhere. You just have to reach down in there, and grab something.”

Dalton stared at the dying man. “I’m not going to touch your {beep}.”

Even having the word leave his mouth, his brain couldn’t comprehend the word. He wasn’t even sure he said the word. But Malcolm understood.

“No one said you had to do that. Unless you want to. In which case I’m going to imagine a woman is grabbing it.”

“Magic underwear?” Dalton gave him a weird look. “You’re being serious?”

“As serious as Eira is when she makes people sign her demon book.”

He didn’t like it. He didn’t want to.

His fingers slid past the man’s waistband, he turned his head away, intent on not remembering this sensation. His fingers touched what felt like a warm, big-

Just a giant wall of static.

When he came back, Dalton was holding up a sausage. He was so surprised he tossed it at Malcolm’s face. The underwear model groaned but he tried to reach for the sausage on his cheek with his tongue.

“So, what I touched wasn’t your {beep}.”

“That’s what I’m saying, just hurry up and dig deep in my briefs. I’m seriously starting to see angels here.” A smile slivered on his pale face. “Man, so hot.”

Dalton shuddered at his breathing. Once more his hand moved down the man’s underwear. He rummaged it, moving his hand all over the place as he tried to find something to grab. Malcolm was giggling.

“Yes, my angel, please take me now.”

“I’m just looking for a potion,” he mumbled under his breath over and over like a mantra.

He leaned in deeper, until the waistband covered his elbow. He felt his fingers scratch at something smooth. Like glass. His heart started to race.

Dalton plunged his whole arm down, finally able to grab it.

“Lucky!” Malcolm sung out.

Dalton wrenched his hand free from, holding up in the light a familiar vile of blue liquid. He gently put Malcolm back on his stomach and pulled out the stone cone from his back. Dalton uncorked the bottle with his teeth and dumped its content in the hole.

“Ahhhh.” Malcolm’s eyes flipped up his head.

If he wasn’t bleeding out, and his eyes were glassed over, Dalton would be sure he was just messing with him.

The potions effects were immediate. Flesh and skin stitched up at high speeds, closing the hole.

Malcolm groaned, his eyes flitted open, and he used a chunk of stone to help pull himself up. He was looking better, but he was still pale. Still, he smiled.

“You’re alive,” Dalton said.

“More than that.” He put his hands on his hips in triumph. “You really worked hard. Like I’ve never had someone just plunge their whole arm down there, but I guess somebody needed to handle my magnum.”

“I felt no magnum there. If there was anything like that, it was so small that I didn’t notice anything.” Dalton shot back.

“Don’t say that. I’m {beep}.”

His head felt like splitting. He could hear the static coming back. “Enough! Let’s just find Jello and kill him so we can go back home.”

“There won’t be any need for that.”

“Why not…”

That wasn’t Malcolm’s voice. He turned around to see Malcolm facing another man. His face was scrunched with vile hatred, while the man wearing the pure white uniform gave the two a toothy smile.

“Salutations!” He waved his hand to the two of them. “I’m the Milkman and I’m here to kill you.” He turned his head to Dalton. “I hope I can give you a relatively painful experience.”