Chapter 0146

Tempest seems to be on a roll today as her victims are presenting themselves to her one at a time.

“I don’t expect an air head like you to understand what we’re talking about. You are one of those fools who would get in the van when a stranger offers you candy.” Tempest said contemptuously.

“What’s a van?” Yu Li Ming asked. She wasn’t the only one confused. The others have no idea what Tempest was talking about either, although they do understand the gist of the conversation.

“That isn’t the point. I’m saying you are one of those idiots who would believe anything you are told.”

“I am not. I don’t believe what you are telling me right now.” Yu Li Ming tried to refute Tempest’s words with facts. She didn’t believe everything everyone tells her and she is proving it by disbelieving Tempest.

Tempest grinned maniacally, as she wanted to lay it into the gullible little girl in front of her for a long time. “Li Ming. Ming Ming. Ling Ling. Ling a bing bing bing. Ting Ting. Ting a ling ling ling.”

“What are you saying? My name is Yu Li Ming. Get it right.” Yu Li Ming said as Tempest went off on a tangent.

“No, you don’t understand. Yu Li Ming can’t be in the Magus Alliance if she doesn’t want her reputation to be tainted.”

“What do you mean?”

“From what I can see, Yu Li Ming has four main issues she needs to resolve. First is the issue of trust. Yu Li Ming doesn’t know who she can trust. Her parents? Her mother is dead. Her father imprisoned her in a dilapidated courtyard with her step mother as the jailor. She doesn’t even know she is being led astray by said jailor or if she is used as a pawn by the very family that was supposed to protect her. After all, if she was worth something, then her family wouldn’t have sent her to an immoral place such as the Magus Alliance with her third uncle.

“The second issue is the matter of her engagement. Who is she engaged to? Does she love her fiancee or is she doing it out of duty? Can she love or is she a pawn used by her family for benefits?

“The third issue is of her reputation. What kind of reputation does Yu Li Ming have? What kind of reputation does Yu Li Ming want? Or does she have a reputation to begin with? A person that doesn’t exist doesn’t have a reputation. So why would it matter? Yu Li Ming doesn’t know anything about her reputation to begin with because she never left the house. Her reputation could have been destroyed and she won’t even know about it. She doesn’t know anything.

“The fourth and most important issue is who is Yu Li Ming in the first place? Is she really a part of the Yu clan? Is she in their genealogy records? Does she want to acknowledge her blood ties to the Yu clan? What kind of person is Yu Li Ming? What kind of person does Yu Li Ming want to be?” Tempest dissected Yu Li Ming’s problem in a very clinical manner. Little did she know she would be forced to face the very same issues Yu Li Ming is facing.

As for Yu Li Ming, every time Tempest brought up an issue, she shrunk into herself. The words cut into her body, cut into her soul. She doesn’t know the answer to the questions. If she doesn’t know the answer to the question Tempest asked, does it mean she doesn’t know herself? Does it mean she is merely a pawned used by her family then thrown away when she has no value? Can their love make up for their mistakes?

So many questions bombard her. She has no answers. Uncertainty plagued her mind, seeping into her soul.

Yu Li Ming blocked her ears, trying to hide away from the uncertainty of her life. The doubts continued to plague her.

What if Tempest is right? What if her father tried to erase her existence? Or worse, what if he only remembers her when he needs to use her for his benefits? Would the pain he is putting through worth the meager amount of love he has given to her?

Even harsher is the questions about herself. Who is Yu Li Ming? Yu Li Ming had lived for 19 years and aside from playing the zither, practicing calligraphy and embroidering in a small shabby courtyard, what else has she accomplished? What was all her efforted for? Strength and power are valued. It is acknowledged by everyone in the Cardinal Realm. Strength and power are everything. Why? Why was told to put effort into skills no one appreciate?

“I could call you Li Ming, Ming Ming, Ling Ling, Ling a bing bing bing, Ting Ting, Ting a ling ling ling and it wouldn’t make a difference. Yu Li Ming was raised to be a tool. Calling the tool Li Ming, Ming Ming, Ling Ling, Ling a bing bing bing, Ting Ting, Ting a ling ling ling doesn’t matter because the tool doesn’t have the will to protest. It can’t protest. So why bother?”

“Tempest, you are going to far!” Fenix was the only one in the group who had the guts to stand up to Tempest when she was psychologically torturing someone. Bei Ting Mao and Graden had a taste of her mind game and they want nothing to do with her when she comes mentally sadistic.

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“No I am not. I am rectifying a minor issue before it becomes a major problem! She won’t go anywhere, be anything if she doesn’t know who she is. She needs to know who she is before she really starts cultivating or her foundation would crumble.”

“She has time to figure it all out. We aren’t even considered adults yet!”

“By that time, we might not be able to fix it.” Tempest grabbed Yu Li Ming by the shoulders and shook her. “Yu Li Ming, look at me.”

“I don’t want to.” Yu Li Ming said with her head bowed.

Tempest grabbed Yu Li Ming by the hair to raise her face up. “Look at me.”

“No!” Yu Li Ming yelled before she fainted.

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High-level meditation techniques are desired by mages because it can put them in a state which allows them to best communicate with the spirits.

Mediation techniques are not the only way to communicate with the spirits.

Mages can speak to their spirits any time the want to. Tempest speaks to her spirits all the time without meditating.

Yu Li Ming was in such a state after suffering from the vicious mental blows posed by Tempest’s questions.

She was once a still pond, quite and peaceful. A drop of water created ripples in the pond. The ripples turned into waves of gush river. The mighty river flowed out to the vast sea.

Yu Li Ming became the sea. Yu Li Ming was lost in the sea. Yu Li Ming was a part of something bigger, something so big it eclipse Yu Li Ming.

She was once a ray of sunshine, bright and happy. The sun rises and the sun sets. The ray of light shines in the dark corner, becoming brighter and brighter as the sun rises, illuminating all the ugliness hidden in the dark. The ray of light shines in the dark corner, becoming dimmer and dimmer as the sun sets, melding into the shadows as it becomes a part of the ugliness of the world.

Yu Li Ming becomes a ray of light. Yu Li Ming was lost in the brilliance of the light shining across the entire realm. Yu Li Ming was a part of something bigger, something so big it eclipse Yu Li Ming.

The sea will not be the sea without the drops of water coming to be.

A ray of light is not the total brilliance of the sun, yet the sun can not be the sun without a ray of light.

“That doesn’t make sense. Does not light originate from the sun?”

Ah, so you can think for yourself.

“Where am I?” Yu Li Ming asked the bright ball of energy. She didn’t know how else to describe them aside from a massive amount of energy given form. Nothing differentiates them from each other aside from their coloring and even then there are only two - blue and bright white.

In your mind.

“Who are you? Or should I ask what are you?”

Your spirits.

That makes sense. It explains the two colors. Blue for water. Bright white for light.

“There is more of you than I’m told I have.” Yu Li Ming was told she had 71 light affinities and 66 water affinities. She isn’t sure exactly how many spirits are in her mind right now because a few of them are hiding themselves from her but she is damn sure there are more than 71 of the bright white balls and there are more than 66 of the blue balls.

Not all stones can detect us.

“They used a broken stone to test my affinities.” Anger welled inside of Yu Li Ming. Testing a child’s immortal potential is very important. It should be done with utmost care, yet their careless manner shows how little regard they had for her.

You need to get rid of your bad habits of jumping to conclusions. We said not all stones can detect us. You should have asked for more information instead of making assumptions.

“I’m sorry.” Yu Li Ming retreated into herself.

No worries, but you must learn to correct this habit of yours. It is one of the major pitfalls with having a high water affinity. They tend to go with the flow, to follow the prescribed path that their brains rot. The bright white ball criticized the blue ball. She wasn’t sure which ball did the talking but she is going to take it one speaks for the group.

Damn happy go lucky twat. What are you insinuating in front of our mortal? The blue balls aren’t going to take it lying down.

I’m not insinuating. I’m saying it outright. You just go with the flow, regardless of where it leads you.

Well, you always look at the brighter side of things regardless of how dark and depressing it is.

There is nothing wrong with that.

That’s call being stupid. If you always see the brighter side, you can’t see the darker side of humanity.

And if you always go with the flow, then you can never walk your own path.

What is wrong -

“Stop.”

Yu Li Ming’s water spirit and light spirit stopped arguing at her behest.

“Why did you bring me here?” Yu Li Ming asked.

You must define who you are or who you wish to be. We made our presence known because in your definition or your ideology of the perfect you, there must be an us.

“I can’t know who I am or who I want to be unless I know everything about myself and you guys want to be a part of me.” Yu Li Ming paraphrase the information given by her light spirits.

Yes.

Yes.

“How do I start being the ideal me? I don’t know where to start or who to trust anymore. My world suddenly turned upside down and I don’t know how to make sense of things.” The spirits sense the anguish in Yu Li Ming. The representative of Yu Li Ming’s light and water spirits went to embrace Yu Li Ming. They comforted her as if she was their long-lost child.

Start with us.

Start with you.

“I don’t know about us. I don’t know about me. I don’t know who to trust anymore. If the very foundation I was raised upon was a lie, then what does that make of me?” Yu Li Ming sobbed into their gentle embrace.

It makes you human.

Find the truth you can accept and build on it.

“The truth I can accept?”

There are more than one version of the truth. When there are three actors in a play, each actor will see the play from the roles they must perform. Their point of view is their truth. It will not be the same as the other actor nor will it be the same as the audience, but it is still the truth.

Yu Li Ming digested the information before forging ahead. Low-level mages rarely get the chance to directly interact with their spirits. She was going to take advantage of the chance Tempest gave her.

“I know different people have different perspectives. I know my perspective is my truth, but it is not the truth. Only by seeing the event from a different perspective and finding the commonality can one infer the truth. You all has been with me since my childhood. I know you know what my life is like. Can you share your perspective with me?”

We will.

We shall.