Rockets roared, and the ship blasted off toward the battle.
Another drumroll barrage from the Katyusha boat, and grey and pink smoke blanketed the area. The enemy fleet's towers and bridges stood from the clouds, and within, wyverns of every size attacking and eating and fucking anything attackable, eatable, or fuckable.
Railgun shells zipped through the smoke from every direction.
Tentacles shot up around the fleet and harassed the enemy ships. Huge fleshy things fives times the length and thickness of whatever we had fought last time. The ships now fired machine guns at the wyverns and entire main cannons at the Kraken and its tentacles, but this was no ordinary beast.
It was a mythic raid boss.
It stood there, in the middle of it all--An octopus, squid, dragon hybrid large enough to swallow the battleship whole, and that's exactly what it was trying to do. Several fat, veiny, limp dick-like tentacles wrapped around the battleship, gripping it so tight we could hear the hull groan and crack as we raced toward it.
Parachutes activated.
We splashed down right in the middle of it all.
The Kraken and its haunting, demonic face paid us no mind. There was only lust in its eyes, and it was gonna fuck that battleship.
The Gimp King stood atop the deck, and he raised his hands. "Brutal Dominion!" A blue sphere of protection shot out around us. A rocket plinked atop the dome with a thump. A line of machinegun fire tapped outside. A tentacle was caught between, and the spell had cut it in half. Now it was just twitching and flopping around on the deck.
"Boarding Party!" I shouted. "Take the battleship!"
A war cry rang out. My pirates and rebels leapt from my deck to the battleship, all led by the hero party. There might've been thousands of imperials on this battleship, while we only had a few dozen who could fight. But our strongest were strong beyond strong. I had no doubt the heroes could solo this ship if they wanted.
I had to trust them. It was all I could do.
The Kraken continued to grip and nibble on the other end of the battleship. This thing was essentially getting spit-roasted by a rebel destroyer and a raid boss.
"Redrim," said Vil. "I'm letting Jessie take my place."
"Go ahead."
I clicked on my internal comms and heard the assault in my ear. The war cry continued down the decks of the ship, and it seemed they had no trouble fighting across all 300 meters of this huge fucking thing. It was an amazing ship, with several clusters of main ship guns--huge fuckers--but I wasn't here for the ship. I was here for the rebels, and as soon as we had them, we'd rocket launch right the fuck out of here.
The blue sphere of protection shimmered and flashed. The world rocked around, the sea kicked up, tentacles shook back. I looked over. A cruiser had exploded, and with the spray of seawater, the entire thing had cracked in half like an egg.
"Redrim," roared the Gimp King. "That's all the protection I may afford you." He hit me with a noble salute. "Good luck, brother."
"Cassandra," I said. "Activate it."
"Confirmed."
Liquid Magic Dispersal (LMD) activated.
External LMD: Manashield activated.
A blue mist shot out from my hull, coming from pipes that ran all throughout my ship and linked to a potion boiler room. This enabled me to use the magical effects of potions across the ship as a whole, and now a blinking blue web of manashield protection magic wrapped us like a cocoon. It was expensive to use but now was the time. Stray bullets and ship gun attacks erupted outside, but the glowing shield held firm.
"Admiral!" shouted the sonar girl.
I looked back, saw her pointed finger, followed it to the enemy battleship bridge, and saw a flash of red light. I squinted at it. There, behind the glass of the enemy bridge, stood the commander's silhouette. The glass shattered with a burst of red fire, and a blur flashed over--
And smashed into my bridge.
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The walls shredded, the glass sprayed away like dust, and I was knocked on my back.
I struggled up and looked--
An admiral's uniform, black and grey. And over his face, a white and red mask.
He clapped as if entertained. The sonar girl groaned beneath the rubble. The world outside flashed with another rocket barrage, and the tentacle-warship-wyvern war raged on.
"Well, well, if it isn't Redrim." He gripped his mask and pulled it off. A gallant young face, sharp red eyes, snow-white hair. "Do you REMEMBER now, Redrim? Or can I call you by your REAL name? Obi. Imsi."
My eyes widened as I realized.
Hmmm-click.
+1 Longsword
His name was Ai-Gee, the swordsman in my old party. He hadn't aged a day, it seemed, but his voice was... much harsher and cutting. To think I had fought him on Dick Island without even realizing.
"Imsi, Imsi," he said. "To think you were alive this entire time."
My trash can mobs sensed danger, and they clank-clank-clanked from outside, armed with spears and muskets. Ai-Gee clicked his fingers, and a burst of red lightning flashed around, sparking through my recycler mobs, and they fell back as smoking, inert pieces of junk.
This wasn't just normal lightning. It was curse lightning, and it could destroy any machine with a single hit. In short: I was fucked if I didn't play my cards right.
"So you're the imperial admiral," I said.
"So you're a fuckin' TRASH CAN," he snapped back with a laugh that followed. "To think Marianna turned you into THIS, of all fitting things."
I should've killed him when I had the chance. This was just the longest long-con fuck up I had ever experienced.
A rising shout erupted from outside, and a black blur shot in--the Gimp King. He was armed with his floppy dildo weapon, mid-swing at Ai-Gee, but something had stopped him with a parry--with another dick weapon. A burst of black smoke shot out, and when it haded, I could see it now. The Gimp King struggled his floppy meter-long dildo against another just as long, just floppy, just as wet--but black.
It was Kisk, my former succubus.
"Demonica," Ai-Gee said, "Stop FUCKING AROUND and get him AWAY from me."
"I don't take your orders, young admiral," Kisk replied. She swung back against the Gimp King, and it knocked him off balance.
I reached out for her and opened my mouth to speak, to call her name, but it was too late. They both flashed away with thumping booms, fighting elsewhere at lightning speed.
Why was she here? With Ai-Gee? Together?
"Imsi, Imsi," Ai-Gee said. He held out his hand, and a red longsword flashed in. "All I want is a duel. Fair and square. We'll make a deal out of it. How's that sound?"
"Name your stakes," I said.
"You know what I want."
"Fine," I said. "If I win, you give me the rebels and let us go. If I lose, then I'll surrender our forces."
He smirked. "Deal," and without a beat, he dashed in.
I ripped out my weapon and parried.
He phased through like a blur, manifested behind me, and I spun around to counter--
He was already gone again!
This fighting style. I remembered it.
My flex arms shot out from my sides and sliced at the air behind me. I felt flesh cut to bone, and I spun with a duck--his sword sliced above me--and I kicked him off balance.
He rolled, thrust his open palm at me--
I smashed a manashield potion at my feet. A glowing blue spider web flashed between us.
He aimed at the sonar girl. The others had escaped, but she was still pinned beneath some rubble.
He chuckled. "So you remembered the Dance of the Red Swordsman, but you somehow forgot that I never fight fair."
I dove.
He fired the spell. Pinkish red fire and lightning howled to the sonar girl, and I landed in front of her.
It slammed into me, through me, coursing through my body and my limbs and my joints--
I electrified. I shuddered, my knees locked, and I fell back to the floor as a jittery, stun-locked mess.
Ai-Gee stomped over to me.
I struggled to fight against the stun.
He stood over me and hit me with another curse-lightning blast.
It stunned me again, but weaker this time. Diminishing returns! I just needed more time to become immune to it, and once I was out--
"I know what you're thinking," he said. "You're thinking that you need more time."
"Fuck you."
He laughed.
Kisk appeared in the doorway. Her black dildo blade dripped blood and saltwater, and she looked dead-eyed at me, then to Ai-gee. "It's done. The warrior has been bound to the ship."
"I told you to KILL HIM," Ai-Gee snapped.
"I don't belong to you, vermin."
I reached out to Kisk. I tried to call out, but Ai-Gee kicked me in the teeth. "Now, now, Imsi," he said. "You lost. Remember our deal? You LOST."
He drew out a little radio communicator, clicked it on, and spoke. "Do it," he said. It squeaked off, and he tossed it aside to clack against the debris. "You see, Imsi, I took on another hobby, rather than being an adventurer. I'm what you would call an aristocrat. You remember how poor we all were? Well, not me."
Iron ropes shot out from his ship and pierced the hull of mine, tethering our ships together. Like chains and harpoons, and now dozens shot into the hull and locked us tight.
"You know," he said, "I always hated you, right? After what you did with that little elf slut--what was her name?--Lolo or some shit?"
"Fuck you."
He clicked his fingers. "Laya! That was it. You agreed that once we stole her, we'd share her, you and I." He knelt down beside me. "You greedy little FUCKER. You kept her all to YOURSELF."
Behind him, the Kraken let out a mighty roar, and its tentacles whipped the air before lashing down at the battleship. It dipped from the force--no--the Kraken was dragging it under! And--oh no--my ship was chained to it.
Ai-Gee grinned. "Predictable as ever, Imsi." He picked me up by the throat, gripped me tight, and carried me to the edge. The water churned white and dark blue below, the skies above overcast, and this old rival glared down into my eyes. A demon portal flashed nearby, and Kisk stepped up to us. She stared sadly at me.
The Kraken yanked the battleship beneath the water. Metal groaned and snapped. Waves crashed. Soon, the imperial battleship dove completely underwater, and with its iron tethers, would soon take my ship with it.
"K-kisk," I grunted.
"Goodbye, Imsi," she said.
Ai-Gee tossed me.
And I splashed into the ocean.
And my ship followed me under.