Assface approached me with two massive wine sacks filled with blood. He didn't even bother to pour them in, he just chunked it with a thud.

Hummmmm.

+8.3L Blood

With this much, I could easily pump out enough potions for a level up or two, so I went right to work. Assface sat in the corner to puff on his pipe, using a nearby candle to carry the flame. I stared hard at him, mostly in wonder about this strange insect of a person. His face was pitted with scars and sun damage, but his eyes told me that he was no older than 25. He was tired. I figured that might've been the result of his life, his struggles, his pathetic, wretched existence. Though I had never given it any thought before, I considered myself lucky in comparison.

I was born an orphan child, but I never thought of it. This was all a part of the prophecy, inscribed upon the land by the Grand Magi, told in cryptic passages found in tomes and inscriptions, recited by wandering monks and priests. When I would enter a new town, it was always they who pointed to my next objective to save the town or the nation or the world from whatever the latest threat was.

As told by the prophecy.

But what the prophecy didn't speak of was the fact that I had been polymorphed into a fucking trash can. Maybe that was the end of my story. To be honest, I lost track of the prophecy a while ago. It had been so long since I last thought about my Main Quest that I completely forgot who or what I was supposed to meet or kill.

Well, at the very least, this was all a new experience for me. Not a good experience, but a new one.

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+ 1660 Blood Element

+ 8,300 XP

+ 1 Level [Level 9]

+ 16 Regeneration Potions (Uncommon), Level 10

Excellent. Now I was ready for the first big step to controlling this new body of mine. As Assface walked over to retrieve and inspect the goods, I raced over to my skill list.

"I'm back!" Jenna stepped into the storeroom with a sack in her hand. "And I brought a present," she sang.

"For me?" asked Assface.

"Uh, no. For our favorite treasonous trash can, of course!"

If I could speak, they would've heard me grumble in irritation. I never liked to be bothered when I was busy, and no gift could possibly sweeten the interruption.

"It's a hat!" she said with excitement.

Sure enough, it was. It honestly looked more like a massive, stretchy condom, but she stretched it over my lid to cover me. Now my mouth was completely separated from the outside world instead of just... you know... hanging open. It was honestly kinda sweet.

Wrrr-Click. "THANK. YOU."

She gasped with joy. "Do you like it?" She looked like a puppy with those massive pouting eyes."

Wrrr-Click. "YES."

After thumping against me with another quick hug, she immediately started running her mouth again about this or that. To be frank, I wasn't listening, and I didn't think Assface was listening either. He only nodded along with each puff of his pipe to sate this girl as she clamored on and on about her day in the market.

Me, on the other hand, went back to work.

"Unlock: Manipulation."

"Manipulation unlocked."

Mrrrrrr. Something was changing inside me. Metal coiled around my inner walls, tiny motors and levers and thin blocks with joints tacked onto one another. It cost my own resources to complete the task, but by the time it was done, I knew instinctively what happened.

I was given a single robotic arm, thin as a rapier but with enough agility as a snake. After every other centimeter was a joint that could be used to bend or twist, enabling my new arm to coil or bend around incredibly tight spaces. At the very end, my "hand" was a strange contraption that started off in the shape of a sword tip, but it could fan out to the shape of a dustpan.

Better yet, was the next skill--Movement.

If I had blood, it would be boiling in resolve.

My quest for revenge had just begun.