Pep’s opponent, a scrawny kid in glasses who didn’t even look like he wanted to be here, played his opening move of e4. According to Kishi, this kid has been playing only a couple days longer than Pep herself had, so on paper it seemed an even match. But I had a feeling I already knew what the result would be ahead of time.

Pep responded with e5, hesitantly pressing her side of the clock with shaking hands. I saw her opponent subtly breathe a sigh of relief, while Kishi’s previously crushed expression rose into a grin. We had only practiced clockless, so Pep had never even used a chess clock before.

Her opponent, now somewhat imbued with a new confidence, played knight to f3 and bishop to c4, the opening moves to the Italian, and upon her third move of knight to f6, he went in for the early kill. Knight g5. The fried liver attack. The second opening trap a beginner tends to learn after the scholar’s mate, and an easy way to end a low rated match almost instantly.

Kishi and Pep’s opponent both exuded an air of confidence, content that this wavering newbie who didn’t even know how to use a chess clock would never play the engine line for such an attack.

And she didn’t. Instead she played bishop c5, and I failed to hide a slight smirk. While Kishi and his newbie both kept up their confident expressions, their number one, the handsome bloke from before, immediately looked distressed. He knew exactly what was coming. The brutal traxler counterattack.

While Pep had indeed found the engine move d5 when we first looked at this opening, I had taken a gamble and taught her this stronger but riskier counter to the fried liver in an attempt to end the game quicker, since these beginner games tended to get unpredictable quickly.

Now, with the rest of us banned from speaking for fair play reason, we could only sit and watch my gamble pay off or fail spectacularly.

As I had expected, her opponent continued the fried liver line unhesitantly, seemingly unaware of the counter line being played against him. Pep played the bishop sacrifice that began the counterattack, and suddenly he went white in the face. He was clearly familiar with one of the most important unspoken rules in chess: no one gives away material in the opening without a reason.

Kishi’s smile disappeared the moment he realised the line being played. After all, any player with a four digit Elo was at least familiar with the traxler. As the strongest counter to one of the most common opening traps, it was ubiquitous among intermediate and high level players. But Pep’s opponent was neither of these, and so he hesitantly took the bishop, the worst move in the position. Pep quickly snagged the e4 pawn with her knight, taking with check and further increasing her opponent’s anxiety.

In a panic, he retreated his king to the back line, making one more fatal mistake that swung the game from ‘slightly black-favoured’ to ‘completely winning for black.’ He correctly identified that moving away from the first row would expose the king to further attacks, but in an attempt to free up movement for his rook, he played the worst move in the position, king e1, back to starting square. This opened the crushing response queen to h4, which comes with check and forces the king to move to an even worse position, e2.

Now, we clearly hadn’t spent long enough on this opening for Pep to remember the checkmate line, but at this point it hardly mattered. She correctly identified that advancing her pawn to d5 both threatened her opponent’s light square bishop and opened up a powerful check with her own, bishop to g4, skewering the king and queen. Even if she didn’t know how to convert to a checkmate net, the game was over, and her opponent laid down his king in defeat.

Enjoying this book? Seek out the original to ensure the author gets credit.

“But… how did… why… why does a beginner who’s never even seen a chess clock before know the whole traxler line?!” Kishi exclaimed, seemingly forgetting to stay in character from the shock.

“Hmph. Looks like our scheme worked out, doesn’t it?” I said to the clubmate beside me.

“Indeed it does. Even better than I expected, I might add,” Sai replied.

Our opponents confusedly looked between one another, and even Pep had no idea what we were talking about. With a slight smirk on my face, I began to answer their unspoken questions.

“The victorious man first wins then seeks war. The losing man first goes to war and then seeks to win. We laid the groundwork for Pep’s victory without her even knowing, and you fell for it hook, line and sinker.” Seeing their confusion rise even further, I turned my attention to the bespectacled boy sitting opposite Pep. “You, glasses. What did you think when you saw Pep make her first move?”

“Huh? Me? I… uh…” he nervously looked at Pep for a moment before answering “I thought she looked inexperienced, even more than me. It seemed like she had never even seen a chess clock before.”

“And because of that, you felt…”

“...overconfident. I remembered being told that that bishop move was a counter to the fried liver, but I ignored it because I assumed she wouldn’t know. I got careless.”

“As expected. I recall that I used the same trick against you in our first game, did I not?” Sai said, turning to me.

“Really had to bring that up again, did ya?” I said, scratching the back of my head. Then again, I did get to steal her Sun Tzu quote, so it was worth it. “Basically, we taught her all we could in the short time we had, but we also wanted you to underestimate her to give her a better chance. Unfortunately, our Pep can’t act for shit, so we had to make it real. This really was her first time playing with a clock.”

“You did that on purpose, you dick?!” Pep shouted at me. “Do you know how nervous I was when I was suddenly told I’d have to play with a clock? I thought I was screwed!”

“Which means it worked like a charm. Thank me later.”

“You’re such an ass! And Sai-chan, you too?! I expect this from him, but I thought you had faith in me!”

“I did. The anxiety on your face was picture perfect. You met my expectations beautifully.”

“That’s what you trusted?!”

In truth, the trick was a tad unethical, and certainly a gamble. If the game hadn’t ended quickly, it’s possible Pep would have flagged under time pressure. That’s why I was glad we were playing rapid, not blitz. That’s also why I taught her riskier counterlines like the traxler, it would mean a short game if her opponent got careless. A gamble which thankfully paid off perfectly.

“You… you fiends! Kaburi, I knew thee were’t a scoundrel, but I at least believed thee to respect the game of war. Thou wouldst sully the beauty of the game with thy… cheap trickery? Forsooth, how the mighty fall.”

“I don’t wanna hear a word about trickery from the asshole who challenged me to a game and then pawned off the duty of beating me to his teammate. Psychological warfare is a legitimate strategy, you’re just a coward and a sore loser.”

“H-How dare thee…”

I don’t know why he ever thought I’d be above dirty tricks and mind games, I used them on him all the time when he challenged me at school. Then again I never openly announced it like I did just then, so he likely never even noticed, the fool.

“W-well, that’s just the first game, right? Let’s move on to games 2 and 3, Kish. We can still bring it back,” said the tall guy awkwardly.

“Y-yes! Of course! We need only beat the both of you here and now to claim victory! No such tricks shall work on the two of us, you heathens!”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever. Let’s just get this show on the road,” I replied, rolling my eyes as obviously as I possibly could. I wanted the dickhead as tilted as possible.

Game one went to us. Now it was on Sai and I to bring it home.