“Well it’s not quite an army, but it’s still a lot of soldiers,” I mused as I watched the soldiers march down the street from the city gate that I had seen Ingrid use earlier.

! Stray cat used Scan !

! Bureaucrat threat level assessment: Blue !

! Soldier threat level assessment: Green !

! Combined threat level assessment: Red !

There were a total of thirty soldiers and Ingrid. I kind of doubted that he would be doing any fighting, so I didn’t need to worry about him much.

It was also interesting to see that thirty soldiers were about the same threat level as Amanda or Hilda on their own.

I guess that’s what being a powerful wizard does for you.

I sighed as I watched the solders march down the road with perfect lock step. The soldiers each had a large shield, a long spear, and a short sword, most of which had simple durability enchantments. About a third of them had crossbows in the middle and there were also two mages and three healers in the back if the staves and the priestly vestments didn’t give them away.

There were also someone in the back that was carrying several long sticks with what looked like a small bell shaped cannon on the end of them that an additional scan revealed to be something called a petard.

“This is bad,” I muttered.

“What is it House,” asked Midnight.

“Ingrid made good on his promise and brought about thirty soldiers,” I replied, “they aren’t that strong individually, but there are a lot of them and they’ve come prepared.”

“Well all we need to do is wait for them at the door and use the, what did you call it? The railgun to take them all out,” Midnight suggested.

It was at that moment, I realized that I had been put in checkmate.

If I chased them off, I would probably have to deal with more soldiers.

If I turned them into a fine red mist with the magic railgun, then I definitely would be fighting more soldiers.

Waiting them out might work, but they would just be back again tomorrow with more soldiers or a stronger mage.

Not to mention that it would severely cut into my business and with the reinforcements I had done and repairs I would need to do, it would be a battle of attrition before I ran out of mana.

Paying off Ingrid might delay the problem, but he’d be coming back next month and I’d be in the same situation again.

“House?” asked Midnight.

“Do you think you can take out one person with a gold ball without using the railgun?” I asked.

“I suppose it would depend on the person and if they can dodge it or block it,” replied Midnight.

“How about someone that’s not a fighter?” I asked.

Midnight smiled a wicked smile as he caught on to what I was suggesting.

“If it’s for who I think you’re suggesting, then I can assure you that I won’t miss,” Midnight said gleefully.

“Good. We might need to kill Ingrid.”

***

“I’m in position, Mr. House,” Carmen said from a rooftop.

“Ready and waiting, House,” Midnight added.

“Alright, we give Ingrid one chance to call this shit off and if he doesn’t just make it quick,” I said with a harsh tone.

Selina walked out to the intersection flanked by two [stalkers] and a grim expression.

The plan was simple: wait until Ingrid showed up with the soldiers and explain that we knew he didn’t have an official seal from the crown and the city council so we were pretty sure that he didn’t have the authority to be here with some of the city’s army.

If he chose not to back down, then Midnight and Carmen would snipe him from opposite ends of the road and then use the [stalkers] to panic the soldiers with hit and run tactics to force a retreat in the confusion.

Most of the locals had done the smart thing and gotten the hell out of dodge. There were a few looky-loos, but those were few and far in between.

Eventually the solders made their way to the intersection and something tickled my brain.

“AT THE CROSSROADS, TWO INTERSECTIONS WILL BECOME THREE AND THE PEN SHALL PROVE MIGHTIER THAN THE SWORD. A CAT WILL BE INVITED INTO THE DEN OF A LION. THERE, THE CAT WILL BE REFLECTED IN A DARK MIRROR. BUT THE CAT WILL NOT DESPAIR AND INSTEAD OF BEING WATCHED, THE CAT WILL BECOME THE WATCHER,”

“Two intersections will become three? The pen shall prove mightier than the sword?” I thought as I tried to shake off the strange feeling.

Suddenly a clap of thunder split the silence and we were met with guildmaster Amanda Medowsong standing in the middle of the crossroads.

“What the hell is she doing here?” I said before realizing that the ‘intersections’ were actually different groups.

She immediately surveyed the scene around her until her gaze landed on Ingrid.

“You!” she exclaimed, pointing at the bureaucrat.

“M-me?” Ingrid stuttered, clearly thrown off by Amanda’s sudden appearance.

“Yes you,” Amanda growled, “what is this all about?”

“Well you see, Mr. house is operating an illegal casino and refuses to pay any taxes on his earnings,” Ingrid began.

Amanda took a deep steadying breath.

“Are you aware that Mr. House is a dungeon?” she asked.

“I don’t see how that’s relevant. The law is very clear on matters of taxation. Who are you, anyways?” asked Ingrid, regaining his composure.

“My name is guildmaster Amanda Medowsong of the Harmony City chapter of the delver’s guild,” she said slowly as if explaining things to a child, “and I believe you have overstepped your jurisdiction.”

Ingrid paled slightly before speaking up, “I hope you have the paperwork to back that up, Mrs. Medowsong.”

“Perhaps we can discuss this in my office,” Amanda said with a wicked smile.

“Ahem,” said Selina who had been ignored for the majority of their exchange, “seeing as how this information pertains to Mr. House. Perhaps I can accompany you to the guildhall.”

“Any objections?” asked Amanda, looking at Ingrid.

“I suppose not,” Ingrid replied as he rubbed his chin.

Not wanting to be left out of something that very much involved me, I hopped into the head of a [stray cat] and ran over to Selina.

Taken from Royal Road, this narrative should be reported if found on Amazon.

“Carmen, Midnight, keep an eye on the soldiers and make sure they don’t do anything funny,” I ordered before jumping up into Selina’s arms.

“No problem, Mr. House,” Carmen confirmed.

“I dare them to move,” Midnight said darkly.

“Is everyone ready?” asked Amanda.

“Ready for-” Ingrid began before Amanda raised her rod and the four of us disappeared in a flash of lightning that shot up into the sky, leaving the soldiers confused, but still in formation.

A second boom filled the air as I took a moment to shake off the disorientation.

We had landed on a roof that, judging by the scorch marks, looked like Amanda’s personal teleportation pad.

“Follow me,” Amanda said before leading us to a door and through what was likely the delver’s guildhall.

We got a few strange looks, but one glance from Amanda and suddenly any curious people seemed to quickly remember that they had something else to do and made themselves scarce.

Eventually, we arrived at her office and settled in.

“So I believe that you said that I was outside my jurisdiction?” Ingrid began.

“Yes, The Lucky Cat Casino and by extension Mr. House are both under the jurisdiction of the delver’s guild and are therefore subjected to the delver’s tax exemption,” Amanda explained.

“But, that would be hundreds of thousands if not millions of gold every year!” exclaimed Ingrid.

“One of the many benefits delvers are legally afforded for risking their lives to ensure that the population of aggressive monsters don’t run rampant over the continent,” Amanda replied.

“Mr. House is doing business-!” Ingrid exclaimed

“If a dungeon is considered safe, citizens are allowed to delve a dungeon for resources at their own discretion,” Interrupted Amanda, “and considering that nobody has been injured without first attacking Mr. House, The Lucky Cat Dungeon has received a safe designation from the guild network.”

“Do you have proof of this?” asked Ingrid.

Amanda opened up a drawer on her desk and began going through papers before a look of realization came over her face.

“It seems that I’ve filed those particular documents away in the guild vault. One moment please,” Amanda said as she got up and walked to the door.

“Very unprofessional, Mrs. Medowsong,” Ingrid quipped.

“My apologies. When you find out that someone is marching a platoon of soldiers on guild business, it doesn’t leave much time for one to gather all of the necessary documents needed,” she replied with a glare that made Ingrid flinch before leaving the room.

“God damn, if looks could kill,” I muttered over the telepathic bond.

“I know!” Selina replied telepathically.

“I’m glad she’s on our side,” I replied, “probably.”

“I know you’ve been a bit wary about trusting the delver’s guild,” Selina began, “but maybe this is a good opportunity to strengthen your alliance with them. It seems like you might be able to operate more or less as you have been and still get the proper legal protections.”

“It’s worth pitching the idea and seeing what Amanda has to say about it,” I replied.

The three of us sat in silence for a few more minutes as I noticed that the clock seemed to get particularly loud for some reason.

“Damn, do all authority figures buy the same brand of clocks?” I wondered as I craned my stray around and focused on the offending timepiece.

! Scan used !

! World Clock scanned !

! Enchantment blueprint acquired !

The last half of Mr. Serendipity’s prophecy replayed in my mind again.

“Of course, Amanda’s a wizard in the same threat level as Hilda! She’s bound to have some neat stuff lying around here!” I thought excitedly as I began to look around the room.

! Scan used !

! Artisan’s Tea Set scanned !

! Enchantment blueprint acquired !

“Huh, neat,” I thought before looking at the display case she had at the far end of the room.

! Scan used !

! Watcher Statue scanned !

! Enchantment blueprint acquired !

Most of the other things in the display case were either mundane objects or magical items that had effects that were barely of any note.

That all changed when I scanned something that looked like someone had shattered an orb and was displaying one of the fragments. In hindsight, I should have realized what it was, but in my excitement, I admit I wasn’t being very careful.

! Scan used !

! Necropolis Dungeon Core Shard scanned !

! Fragmented data detected !

! Attempting to restore…………… !

! Restoration partially successful !

! Transferring restored data !

My [stray cat’s] eyes dilated as more information than ever flooded into my mind.

I could only sit there while the rest of the world around me passed by in a periphery awareness.

! Transfer complete !

! Check notifications for a list of acquired blueprints !

I felt myself mentally shudder as I returned to the present moment.

“-you can see, the guild has designated The Lucky Cat Dungeon aka The Lucky Cat Casino as a peaceful dungeon.” Amanda explained as she showed some document to a fuming Ingrid.

“That-! Who’s going to pay the taxes the dungeon has accrued up to this point!” Ingrid sputtered.

“The guild will be taking any and all legal matters pertaining to the dungeon,” Amanda said coolly as she handed Ingrid a second document, “after all, the guild owns the lot the casino is on.”

I paused at that.

Sure, the warehouse was abandoned before I showed up and probably for sale on the cheap, but I was weary of landlords back on Earth where the tenant protections were admittedly not great, but still probably better than anything that was around in this world.

While I mulled this over, Ingrid was doing his best fish out of water impression as he held his mouth agape.

“So if you have any official documents from the crown and the city council, I’ll be taking those. Or did you not come prepared?” Amanda asked with a smirk.

“Official documents from the crown and city council?” Selina piped up innocently, “we only got an invoice and a notice that our taxes were overdue.”

Amanda’s glare snapped on to Ingrid like a hawk who had just seen a rabbit.

“AHEM, well, seeing as you have all of your paperwork in order, I believe I can drop the fines and wave the taxes,” Ingrid said as he did his best to compose himself.

“See that you do,” Amanda replied, with a composed and quiet fury.

Not much else was said. Business had apparently been concluded and Amanda was gracious enough to teleport us back to the intersection much to the surprise of the soldiers.

Ingrid caught the attention of the captain or the sargent or whoever was the boss of the soldiers and explained that they would no longer be needing to attack me.

Amanda, Selina, and I watched them march off into the distance before Amanda turned to the two of us.

“I assume that you have some questions about your situation especially regarding the guild’s legal ownership of your lot,” Amanda began.

“Yeah, how much of this is going to effect me?” I asked, “because I’m fine with it if I’m left alone and you want to handle the legal junk.”

“Mr. House is wondering how much the guild is going to influence his day-to-day and if you’ll try to put undue pressure on his business operations,” Selina said.

“The guild network has an unofficial hands off policy when it comes to peaceful dungeons. Why fix what isn’t broken? My guild is also willing to offer legal protections as long as you stay inside gild owned land,” Amanda explained.

“Hands off? That’s a relief. I’m fine with not expanding out if I don’t have to face down Harmony City’s army again,” I sighed.

“Mr. House is amenable to these conditions,” Selina agreed.

“Wonderful. Any other questions?” asked Amanda.

Suddenly an idea struck me.

“Would the guild be willing to buy the surrounding lots if I gave you the money?” I asked.

“Mr. House would like to inquire if the guild would be willing to buy the surrounding lots if he were to provide the funds to do so,” Selina said.

“Hmm, we’ll have to think about it,” Amanda replied, “let’s see how this works out for now.”

“Fair enough,” I replied.

“Mr. House agrees to wait and see,” Selina dictated.

“Anything else?” asked Amanda.

“Not for now,” I replied.

“Mr. House will contact you if any other concerns arise,” Selina said.

Amanda seemed to relax and in that moment, the familiar look of overwork was visible on her face.

We bid each other farewell before Amanda teleported back to the guild hall.

! Invaders repelled !

! Experience gained !

! Mana gained !

! Milestone reached !

“Ah shit,” I swore as a bright light filled my vision.

! Winter Solstice Holiday Cosmetic pack unlocked !

“What the hell-” I swore before a cold gust of wind raced through the street and a few flakes of snow fell from the sky.

“Wow, looks like winter has come early this year,” Selina said as she held out her hand to catch the flakes where they instantly melted into water.

“Yeah…” I replied noncommittally.