“On one hand, the dungeon has increased security, so it’s not like he’s just using cats to defend himself. On the other hand, I heard that Rex was the one who spearheaded the attack…” Duke said as he paced back and forth in the room.

“Look, you’ve been doing really well as far as not letting the dungeon occupy your mind recently, but in this case, I think it’s fine if-” Zee started.

The door burst open as Jasper’s eyes immediately landed on Duke.

“Duke! It’s horrible! The dungeon closed and nobody’s renting my carts! I can’t go out of business again!” Jasper exclaimed frantically.

Duke sighed, “alright Jasper, let’s go see if things are really as bad as they seem.”

***

“So Zee did your spell reveal anything?" Jasper asked anxiously as the three of them made their way down the street.

"I started listening after the fight had already begun,” Zee explained, “from what I can tell, the dungeon managed to chase off whatever was attacking him, but not before a lot of things got broken.”

“This is horrible, how long do you think he’ll be closed? A day? Three? A week? Oh please don’t be longer than a week,” Jasper moaned.

“Stop fretting, you’re making me anxious,” Zee said.

“In case you’ve forgotten, the carts and by extension the dungeon, is the only reason we have a roof over our head,” Jasper snapped.

“Easy Jasper,” Duke said, holding out his hands as if to calm a wild animal, “we’re almost there. You’ll have your answers in a minute.”

The rest of the walk was spent in relative silence only interrupted by Jasper’s incessant worrying.

Finally, the three of them reached the sliding barn door of the dungeon.

Duke reached out to knock, but before his hand reached the door, it slid open.

“Oh thank the gods,” Jasper sighed.

Zee opted to simply roll his eyes and follow Jasper and Duke into the dungeon.

“Wow, would you look at that,” Jasper said as he took in the noticeable difference in size from the last time they had visited.

“I think things are going fine for the dungeon,” Duke said as he looked around in awe.

“The dungeon has a name, you know,” called a woman from across the vast space.

The three of them spun around as the woman’s footsteps echoed off of the walls.

“Who are you if you don’t mind me asking?” questioned Duke as she stopped in front of the three of them.

“Ah, where are my manners? Allow me to introduce myself. I am Selina, voice of Mr. House,” she said with a playful confidence despite her plain clothes.

“The dungeon’s name is Mr. House?” asked Jasper, “like how a casino refers to itself?”

Selina rolled her eyes and grinned.

“It’s actually a funny story,” she began, “the scions of the dungeon, Midnight and Carmen, referred to the dungeon as House, like a home. The decision to expand into gambling as a kinder method of encounter was actually just a coincidence.”

“Midnight and Carmen. You mean the black and white cats,” Zee supplied.

“Give you one guess as to who is who,” Jasper quipped.

“Jasper!” Zee hissed.

Selina’s smile grew a touch wider as here eyes flicked toward the ceiling for a moment.

“So what brings you by? Haven’t seen you in a while,” Selina asked.

“Jasper, and I suppose the rest of us are worried about Mr. House,” Duke replied, “I heard you got into quite the fight the other day.”

Selina’s smile dropped for a moment.

“Oh yes quite serious. We were able to repel the invaders without injury to any of the fine patrons who were here at the time of the incident, buuuut with all of the extra mana that was collected from the fight as well as the quests that Mr. House issued, I was able to be summoned to this world!” Selina said, her smile returning at the end.

“I see,” said Duke with a level expression, “I’m glad no one was hurt.”

“Hey, quick question,” Jasper interrupted, “what kind of a time frame are you anticipating until the reopening?”

“As you can see, we’ve got a lot more space to work with now, so it’ll probably be about a week and a half to two weeks,” Selina said.

“Two weeks!?” Jasper sputtered.

“Something the matter?” Selina asked.

“Jasper, it’s okay,” Duke said, “Zee and I can pick up an odd job or two in the meantime.”

“This isn’t about the rent, my pride as a merchant is on the line,” Jasper said with frustration.

Selina’s ear twitched.

“If you would be interested, Mr. House might be willing to making a trade,” she said.

“What kind of a trade?” Jasper asked, suddenly suspicious.

“Oh nothing major, Mr. House requests two things,” Selina said holding up two fingers, “one: that you tell Mr. House about different card and dice games and two: spend the two weeks he needs to renovate letting people know about his re-opening!”

“Wait, so he wants me to advertise for him?” Jasper asked.

“And tell him about what kinds of gambling would be familiar to the locals. In Mr. House’s words ‘Jasper seems like the kind of guy who’s been gambling a few times,’” Selina said.

“Hey!” Jasper exclaimed indignantly.

Zee snickered, “Sounds like Mr. House has a good read on you, Jasper.”

“Oh screw you, Zee!” Jasper exclaimed.

“Now, now, how about I let you guys sample an upcoming product?” Selina said diplomatically.

“Product?” Zee asked.

“Oh yes, here come some samples now,” Selina said.

The sound of rapid footsteps began to approach the four of them, and much to the surprise of three of them, a small figure wearing a leather apron approached carrying three corked bottles of clear liquid.

“My name is alchemist Mittens of the Cat-kin and I hope you enjoy my latest work,” said Mittens as he handed out the bottles to the three of them.

“Thanks…” said Duke as he accepted the bottle.

“Um what is it?” asked Jasper.

“Try it, It’s good!” insisted Mittens.

“Zee?” asked Duke as Zee nodded and waved his hand over the bottle.

“Ah, I haven’t seen one of these in forever,” chuckled Zee, “it’s a potion of inebriation.”

“What, like booze?” asked Jasper.

“Well yes- I mean technically no- but essentially yes,” Zee rambled as he searched for the correct word.

“Zee, dumb it down for us,” Duke said.

“Well it doesn’t technically contain any alcohol, but the potion has an effect that is indistinguishable from alcohol,” Zee explained, “it was likely developed by underage academy students who wanted to have booze, but couldn’t get their hands on it.”

“Is it safe?” Jasper asked.

“Oh yes, about as safe as booze is at any rate,” Zee replied.

“Good enough for me,” Jasper shrugged and took a swig of the potion.

Reading on this site? This novel is published elsewhere. Support the author by seeking out the original.

“How is it?” Duke asked.

“Not bad,” Jasper replied, “it’s got a flavor to it, but it’s hard to explain.”

“Oh amazing, these things usually taste terrible,” Zee said before following suit.

Duke shrugged and similarly took a sip.

“Huh, you’re right, it’s good, but it’s hard to describe,” Duke said, “kind of light but also a touch dry.”

“Like if you based the flavor on the description of alcohol, but you’ve never tasted it before?” Zee offered.

“And if you never acquired the taste for it,” Jasper added.

“I’m so glad you like it,” Mittens beamed, “it’ll be available in five, fifteen, forty, and sixty percent strength.”

“Sixty?” Jasper asked, “never mind Duke, the dungeon IS trying to kill people.”

“That strength is only available in small servings. Only enough for a mouth-full at most,” Selina explained.

“The mana sickness will prevent anyone from going too overboard on the effects,” Zee said.

“Well everything sounds interesting at the very least,” Jasper said, “what kind of a rate would you be paying for advertising?”

“Mr. House is willing to give fifty silver up front and an additional silver for everyone who shows up at the opening.” Selina explained in a tone that was all business.

The only thing that had stopped Jasper’s eyes from practically popping out of his head was his years of experience as a merchant.

“That’s very generous of Mr. House,” Jasper said, “forgive me for saying so, but that seems like a lot for a few card games and some advertising.”

“Consider it a special rate for the first customer of the casino,” Selina replied.

Jasper blinked in surprise.

“Yeah, I guess I was, wasn’t I,” he admitted.

“Mittens, if you would,” Selina said.

Mittens reached into his apron and produced a bag of silver coins.

“If you would be so kind as to come back tomorrow with the necessary implements to explain local games, that would be most agreeable,” Selina continued, “of course, Mr. House is willing to reimburse you if you need to make a purchase and can produce a bill of sale.”

“A pleasure doing business with Mr. House,” Jasper said, slipping into a similar business tone.

“And with that taken care of, I’d appreciate it if you three would go ahead and scooch out of here,” Selina said, reverting back to her usual cheery demeanor, “House gets embarrassed when people watch him change.”

***

“I do not get embarrassed,” I explained slowly, “I literally can’t build anything when someone from outside the dungeon is in the dungeon and I can only put items down as long as nobody is looking at the location where I’m putting the item.”

“Yeah, I know, but my explanation was funnier,” Selina said with her usual cheshire grin.

“At least you didn’t make a joke about people lining up to get inside of me,” I sighed.

Selina let out a guffaw.

“I’ll need to remember that one for later,” she said.

I would have facepalmed if I had hands. Or a face…

“Me and my big mouth,” I muttered.

“Speaking of people being inside of you,” Selina said, her attitude suddenly turning serious, “we need to talk about those invaders.”

“What about them?” I asked.

“The core room lacks some serious security,” Selina said.

“What do you mean? Tom’s been doing a great job,” I said.

“Tom’s been doing a fantastic job considering the circumstances,” Selina corrected.

I sighed, “Okay, what are you driving at?”

“What I mean is that Tom is just one cat,” Selina explained, “a very large and capable cat, but still just one cat.”

“Yeah and he’s kicked all of the asses that have dared to cross him,” I said.

Selina sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose.

“Okay, you remember when Haggar cast that spell at you?” she asked slowly, once again demonstrating knowledge of events before being spawned.

“Yeah that spell fizzled out as soon as it touched me,” I replied.

“Well you’re extremely lucky that it was a spell designed to dispel magic by brute force and not literally anything else,” Selina explained.

“Oh,” was all I could say as the color drained from my proverbial face.

“‘Oh’ is right,” Selina said, “House, your faith in your companions is a wonderful thing and I respect that immensely, but you need to support yourself as much as we support you.”

A long silence hung in the air.

“So, any ideas about increasing security in the core room?” Selina asked.

I thought for a moment.

“Oh! what about a hidden chute that sends me underground whenever someone enters the core room?” I suggested.

“Hmm, that’s an idea, but there’s a bit of a problem with that,” Selina said.

“What’s that?” I asked.

“Moving yourself so suddenly and while invaders are in the dungeon is more than likely going to disconnect you from everything,” Selina said gently.

“What do you mean ‘disconnect me from everything?’” I asked.

Selina paused to consider her answer.

“So you know how a plant puts out roots as it grows?” she asked.

“Yeah,” I replied a little irritated that I was being compared to a plant for the second time.

“Well as the dungeon grows, it puts out more and more ‘roots’. At an early stage, a plant can be uprooted and replanted with relative ease, but at a certain point it becomes much more difficult to move a core,” she explained.

“Okay, but what does this have to do with getting disconnected?” I asked.

“This is where the metaphor breaks down. The roots are magical channels that act as your awareness of your surroundings. If you get suddenly moved like with your emergency escape hatch idea, then you would need to reestablish your connections and there’s no telling how long that could take,” Selina continued.

“If I had known that, I would have reconsidered putting myself on a desk,” I muttered.

“Oh I wouldn’t worry about that, the desk has already fused to the floor,” Selina said.

What.

Sure enough the desk had indeed fused to the floor.

“Wait, when did that happen?” I asked.

“About the time you made that desk your dais,” Selina replied.

“When did THAT happen!?” I exclaimed.

***

Amanda Medowsong, Guildmaster of the delver’s guild of Harmony City looked down at the letter in front of her.

The contents of the letter claimed that a dungeon had expanded in the warehouse district of Harmony city, the safest city on the continent.

Normally she would have dismissed the letter as the ravings of some unfortunate soul living by the docks and gone about her day.

Unfortunately, that wasn't the only thing the letter had contained.

A bloody jacket fitted for a dwarf hung on a mannequin across from her.

The jacket looked to be shredded by a wild animal or monster. Blood was present in the cuts.

Still, this wasn't the first time someone had tried to stage an elaborate prank.

Animal blood could be obtained easily enough if you were on good enough terms with the local butcher and a kitchen knife could make holes in leather just as easily as a monster could.

However that didn't account for the most damning piece of evidence that was currently in her hands.

A small glass vial containing several claw fragments and a chipped tooth that her ranger Ulandi had found embedded in various parts of the jacket.

According to Ulandi, the claws and tooth had come from a monster commonly referred to as a Stalker.

This was concerning, because stalkers usually came from an area called the Dark Jungle thousands of miles away from Harmony.

Although highly unlikely, this still could have been an elaborate prank conducted by a particularly bored or spiteful noble deciding that an old piece of taxidermy was worth a laugh before they got rid of it.

The only problem with that theory is that the ranger had declared that the chipped tooth was fresh and that the blood was, in fact, from a dwarven male.

Amanda knew better than to doubt the ranger’s conclusion. Anyone worthy of the title of ranger had a sense for these things that could rival a diviner’s best attempts at a psychometric scrying.

Amanda sighed and wrote a letter to Ulandi asking her to scout out the location and confirm if a dungeon had appeared at the address in the letter.

She considered sending it right away by night courier, but even if Ulandi was awake, she wouldn't be setting out until first light at the earliest.

Amanda left the letter in the middle of her desk as a reminder to send the letter as soon as possible tomorrow morning before heading home.

Despite the rumors, she didn't sleep in her office.

Not when she could help it, of course.

***

“Okay coast is clear,” called a disembodied voice from the hallway after the guildmaster had left her office for the night.

A tall lanky half giant peaked from around the corner as a blond human seemingly materialized from thin air after removing a plain looking circlet from their head.

“Are you sure about this River?” asked the half giant, “breaking into the kitchen or the training ground is one thing, but breaking into the guildmaster’s office is another thing entirely.”

“It’s almost like you don’t want to get in on whatever’s going on, Edwin,” said River.

“No, it’s just that I don’t want to get kicked out so soon,” said Edwin.

“We’re not going to get kicked out, the guildmaster is totally going to be all like ‘hmm breaking into my office shows initiative. Also thank you for taking care of that problem for me. I’m promoting you from cadet effective immediately’ and I’ll be like ‘oh thank you so much guildmaster’ or at least that’s what she’ll be like as long as you can take care of the lock,” River rambled.

The half giant sighed as he took out a roll of tools and got to work.

“Yes! That's what I’m talking about,” River exclaimed.

With surprising dexterity, the half giant had the lock opened and the two of them inside before anyone else could walk in on them whisper-shouting in the hall.

“Woah, what do you think did that?” asked River, looking at the shredded leather jacket on the mannequin in the middle of the room.

“No idea, but that’s probably what all of the fuss was about this morning,” Edwin replied, “I guess this is what the guildmaster brought Ulandi in for.”

“Speaking of Ulandi, there’s something addressed to her on the table,” River said.

Edwin cringed internally as River broke the wax seal without hesitation and began reading the letter.

“Edwin, take a look at this. We’ll get promoted for sure!” River said in a sing-song tone as they shoved the letter at the half giant.

Edwin just sighed as he watched his friend do a silent happy dance in place.

He made a quiet prayer to any of the heavenly hosts who might be listening that the two of them wouldn't get kicked out for this.