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The First Flame
77. Under the Light of a Paper Moon

77. Under the Light of a Paper Moon

“The hell is taking him so long?” Iris asked herself while sprawled out in bed. “He said he wouldn’t take long in the bath. Why else would I let him go first?”

She groaned and rolled over, growing ever more impatient with him. With a sigh, she crawled towards the door and peered out and saw that his bedroom door was closed and she could see a faint light coming from under the door.

Okay, sure, just don’t tell me when you’re done, she thought as her irritation rose. She got up from the bed and started taking off her sweat-drenched clothes, replacing them with a thick and soft robe. She grabbed a towel from the drawer nearby and draped it over her arm, making her way towards the bathroom. As she approached, she saw that the bathroom door was still closed yet no light shone from inside.

Iris scoffed and opened the door to the dark bathroom and looked around for the candles on the sink and the box of matches in one of the drawers. Humming a tune, she started lighting the candles near the sink, giving the room a nice and warm light that eased her mood. She gathered the remaining matches and turned towards the tub, preparing to light some candles there too.

And glowing red eyes returned her gaze. “Need I explain to you the concept of a closed bathroom door?” a familiar voice growled.

Iris shouted as she saw the very naked Titan leaning back in the large tub, soaking in the water with many of his features hidden underneath the warm water. She dropped the matches and covered her face; partly to shield her from the sight and partly to hide her face.

“You were taking too long!” she exclaimed in a squealing voice.

“I am relaxing, what do you expect?” Arylos returned with a deep sigh as he closed his eyes and leaned back. “It’s almost tempting to fall asleep right now.”

“But I need to bathe too!” Iris continued while shaking her head, refusing to lower her hands. “I had to move a bunch of cut logs of wood today!”

“And I had to move uncut logs and rebuild stone today, not to mention win you all of that cash,” Arylos returned in a relaxed voice. “I’ll get out in a few minutes if that makes you feel better.”

Iris shook her head and finally lowered her hands. “Nope, you said you wouldn’t take long. So get out or I’m going in with you.”

“We’ve already bathed together once, see if I care,” Arylos returned without hesitation.

Iris blushed, remembering the bathhouse visit they took after Torasu. “T-That was different! Things were different then!”

“Oh? How so?” Arylos teased.

Iris instinctively held her robe closer. “Y-You’re just trying to make a move on me, aren’t you?”

“Make a move?” Arylos asked while finally opening his eyes to look at her. “What are you on about?”

Iris’s embarrassment disappeared as she looked back at Arylos in confusion. Her emotions have been twisted up for a while since she realised how she felt but it just made things feel awkward.

But he doesn’t feel that way? she had the sad thought run through her head.

“Wouldn’t it be embarrassing if I undressed?” she asked in a shy voice.

“I’ve seen a great deal of people without clothing,” Arylos responded while closing his eyes and leaning back again. “Templarians, Semigonians, Arvekai, Kaiyumae, Terrans, Kyrasse, and more. Hell, I’ve even seen Bellona naked on an occasion. At this point, what would be embarrassing? I’ve lived long enough to have seen many races like your own long before you became civil enough to discover clothing.”

Iris felt a bit of sadness come over her. She didn’t get it; on one hand, Arylos says she’s special and irreplaceable but then he says things like that which implies that she’s no different than anyone else. It made her confused, hurt, and distraught. All she wanted was to be special, and yet he just admitted she wasn’t.

She took a deep breath and turned around, seeing that Arylos was still leaning back with his eyes closed. Iris let out a sigh and closed the door and untied her robe, letting it slide off as she wrapped her towel around herself, willing to compromise with herself. She looked at the family sized tub, knowing she could fit but knew that since Arylos was in the middle, it would make a tight fit for her.

She swallowed what little hesitation she had left and set a foot in and reeled back from the heat of the water. The water was almost scalding, as if it was fresh and not the water that had been sitting here for half an hour. She committed and stuck her foot in followed by her whole leg, gasping from the heat of the water.

“What’re you doing?” Arylos asked in his softer voice.

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“If you’re going to take so long, I’m climbing in too,” Iris responded, gasping as she stuck her other leg in.

Arylos laughed and groaned as he moved himself over, giving her more room. Iris laughed to herself as she lowered herself in, feeling the water cover her torso and knock the air out of her as she leaned against the wall in the tub.

“You don’t have to be such a hardass all the time, you know,” She teased while lowering her arms in but keeping the towel wrapped tight.

“Coming from the girl who broke the one rule of fighting,” Arylos laughed.

“That only applies to guys!” Iris spat back, trying to defend herself.

“It’s interesting though,” Arylos whispered under his breath, ignoring her outburst.

“What is?” Iris returned in confusion.

Arylos took a deep breath and kept his eyes closed as he relaxed. “Last year, you were upset, distraught, that you hit me; just a simple slap on the face was enough to reduce you to tears and think that I hate you. Yet you stood up to me today and fought me head on.”

“Things are different,” Iris returned while feeling her embarrassment come back to her. “I got something out of it this time. I’ve been wanting to try fighting you, just to see what it’s like.”

“And yet you know that if I go all out, you’ll lose, right?” Arylos returned.

“Are you saying you went easy on me?” Iris returned in shock.

“A little bit,” Arylos confessed. “You don’t really expect me to want to rip you apart with my bare hands, did you?”

Iris squirmed in the water, feeling her embarrassment warm her more than the hot water. “M-Maybe a little,” she confessed.

Arylos’s eyes shot open and he turned to face her, looking at the embarrassed girl as he processed it. “That’s fucked,” he answered sharply.

“I didn’t mean it like I’m suicidal or anything!” Iris cut in while shaking her head.

“That doesn’t help your case,” Arylos answered as if shocked. “I would almost prefer that explanation over what you’re telling me it is.”

“It’s not sexual either!” Iris shouted while splashing water at Arylos.

“That’s even more concerning,” Arylos returned while shaking his head.

“What could be more concerning than that?” Iris asked while finally turning to face Arylos.

“That you’re some kind of masochist who enjoys getting hit or yelled at,” Arylos replied with no hesitation.

“That classifies as sexual you big idiot!” Iris returned while splashing him with more water.

“Whatever makes you feel better,” Arylos laughed as he leaned back into his relaxation. Iris tried her hardest to try and loosen up in the hot water but she couldn’t help but feel more tense being this close to him. The warmth of the water was nice but she couldn’t help but to berate herself for doing something so immature, so childish, all so she could get a rise out of him.

Or is this something I’m doing for myself? she wondered to herself. She had questions for herself in many different ways and as she looked at the relaxing Titan lit only by candlelight, she couldn’t help but feel yet more confusion take her. She moved closer to him and leaned her head against his arm, feeling a bit of the tension fade away.

While she felt embarrassed around him a lot of the time now, she also felt relaxed. She started to figure out how she felt with him, but the question now was whether or not any of it was right. He is a Titan, an otherworldly being that created her reality. She couldn’t apply any humanly ways of thinking to him.

Therefore, what if he doesn’t feel the same way for her that she does for him?

That line of thinking always made her cold inside, the warmth he gave her always faded away when the thought came around. It was her one hindrance; the one thing stopping her from coming to terms with all of this. She knew that he cared, but she wanted something more, something specific. She wanted this emotion she felt for him to be returned to her.

She moved closer and rested her hand on his chest, taking comfort in his presence. She allowed herself to forget what he is, forget what the body is she’s leaning against. She would only allow herself to see him as what she always saw him as; her friend, all she has left, and the one who has been there for her. She didn’t care about his true nature, the truth of his body, the history of his people, the truth of the Dragon Wars.

She wanted to see him.

She closed her eyes and took in the warmth. She instinctively felt for a heartbeat but found none, and yet that did not scare her as much as it used to. If anything, this heartless creature was more comforting than if he were a human.

Iris took it all in, not wanting it to end. She enjoyed the warmth for what it was as she moved herself all the way up against him.

“I thought you wanted to soak in the tub,” she heard Arylos’s voice rumble in her ears.

Iris was snapped to reality as she opened her eyes but saw that Arylos was still relaxing with his eyes closed. “I’m sorry, most men would pay good money for a half naked girl to be this close to them in the bathtub,” she teased.

“Too bad I’m not like most men,” Arylos responded as he opened one of his eyes and looked at Iris. “And here I thought you wanted me to get out,” he returned with a smile.

Iris thought for a moment but closed her eyes and held onto him once more. “Not just yet,” she responded.

“Not that I mind, but you’re getting clingy again,” Arylos responded while laughing under his breath. “Is everything alright? This has been happening a lot more recently.”

“I’m alright, really,” Iris sighed while letting go of Arylos. “I guess I kind of have a need for closeness and you’re the only one I have.”

Arylos laughed and rubbed Iris’s scalp. “As long as you’re happy then,” he told her in a soft voice. “Although, I think I’ve taken the bath from you long enough.”

Iris let out a disappointed sigh as she moved to the side. “You owe me later, you hear me?”

Arylos laughed and rose to get out of the water. As his waist broke the water, Iris suddenly blushed and turned around. “You’re naked!” she squealed while hiding her face.

“Uhh, yeah, it’s almost like a few minutes ago, I was bathing alone in here minding my own business,” Arylos returned while sticking his tongue out to an Iris who wasn’t looking.

Iris had to resist as hard as she could to keep herself from turning back around to look. The last thing she needed right now was even more fuel on the fire of confusion.