As morning light came in through the windows, Arylos sat at the dining room table, staring at the Templarian letter that stirred his anger. He read the words on the page continuously, hoping to find some other reason for them, praying for there to be a secret message that would leave him in peace. Yet he knew this language well and he knew Anoron just as well; Anoron has a way with words but he would not dare lie using this tongue. Arylos clenched his fist as the realization came back to him; the fact that Anoron already knew what he would say. Anoron knew Arylos’s answer and knew that he would say yes either now or in the future, even if he denies it now.
Arylos looked at his shaking hands, clenching his fists as his nails dug into his palms. He wanted to be better than this, better than the monster Anoron thinks he is. He could not let him revert to his old ways; he had to resist. Yet Anoron was insinuating that as much as Arylos does not want to fight, he will fight. The idea chilled the Titan’s blood; just what awaited him that would force him to change? He grew fearful of the future, afraid of what awaited him. Arylos ran his hands through his hair, digging his nails into his scalp so physical pain accompanied his mental pain.
The Titan growled as he no longer felt in control of his fate.
Before Arylos lost himself, he felt a soft kiss on the nape of his neck as warm arms wrapped around his shoulders. “Breathe honey,” he heard Iris’s voice whisper in his ear as her arms held him tighter.
Arylos heeded her words as he let out a shaking sigh, grabbing her arms as he took in her warmth. “Thank you,” he said softly as he regained control of himself.
“You’ve been like this since yesterday, do you want to talk about it?” Iris said as she rubbed her cheek against Arylos’s.
“I’m afraid,” Arylos confessed softly as he looked down at the letter. “This can’t be how this ends. There has to be more than this. I have to be better than this.”
“I know honey,” Iris said as she pulled away from Arylos and kissed his scalp. “You don’t need to beat yourself up over it like this though.”
“If Anoron is so confident that I’ll agree with him, that means something bad will happen,” Arylos said while turning around towards Iris. “I can’t just clear my mind of it; what if something happens to you? What if that’s what leads me back to him?”
Iris smiled and tapped Arylos’s nose. “You think I’ll die and you’ll run to him and start killing Eikons left and right?”
“That’s exactly what I’m worried about,” Arylos said as his voice reverted to a low growl. “Anoron will only tell you half of the truth; only what he deems you necessary to know. That’s how he traps you, like a deceptively manipulative prophecy with just the right details to make you believe it.”
Iris sighed as she watched her mentally broken Titan, unable to find the words to cheer him up. She knew that he only wanted to keep her safe and now his ability to do that was called into question. She could only come close and hold his head against her torso and run her fingers through his hair. As she held him, she could tell Arylos was holding back tears as he returned her embrace tightly.
“Alright then,” Iris said with a deep sigh. “How about we visit the Dairiki’s and their little crotch goblin?”
Arylos slowly regained his composure as he pulled away from Iris and looked up at her. Iris smiled as she saw confusion in his eyes, no trace of the sorrow and anger he held within earlier. “Hold on, what did you just say?” Arylos said as the corner of his mouth started to rise.
“I mean Aniya,” Iris said with an innocent smile.
“No no no, what did you call her?” Arylos said while raising his hand and trying to contain laughter.
“Crotch goblin, you know?” Iris said matter-of-factly.
Arylos looked at her as his eyebrows furrowed and he could no longer contain his smile. “Alright then, I can’t tell if that’s the weirdest thing you’ve said or not.”
“Oh please, that’s far from the weirdest thing you’ve heard me say,” Iris said with a prideful laugh.
“No but it comes close,” Arylos said as he got up from the chair and gave Iris a pat on the head before going over to the living room. “Fine then, let’s go see your adopted niece.”
“That’s the spirit, big boy,” Iris said with a smile as she followed Arylos. Arylos laughed under his breath as he knelt down next to the torotsu and lifted the blanket to check on the coals in it. Iris’s smile took an evil turn as she watched the Titan leave himself vulnerable. Without warning, she swung her arm and slapped Arylos on his butt with a mighty clap. Arylos froze in place and cracked a smile as he rose back up with the basket of coals and turned towards Iris with a smile she knew all too well.
“You know, you could see my ass and just walk by without slapping it,” Arylos said while stifling laughter.
“You know the rules honey; you show your butt, I have to praise it,” Iris said while tapping Arylos’s shoulder.
“You know, a few years ago I actually did have an ass; now you’ve slapped it so much it’s flat,” Arylos said while moving towards the fireplace and opening the iron curtain, debating on bending over again to dump the coals into the fireplace.
“Oh come on now honey, you know you love it,” Iris said as she watched Arylos deliberate leaving himself exposed like that again.
Arylos laughed to himself and once again knelt down in front of the fireplace and began dumping out the coals. Iris laughed as she quickly went over towards Arylos but before she could do anything, she felt a smack on her butt just as strong as the one she gave Arylos, sending blood to her face as she blushed.
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“Nice try, little girl,” Arylos laughed as he stood back up and placed the basket on the torotsu’s table, watching her with his glowing red eyes.
“No fair! No magic!” Iris complained while slapping Arylos’s upper arm.
“Don’t think that the rule you just applied to me does not include you,” Arylos said while walking towards the foyer, reaching for his jacket and boots. “You’re the one with a dangerous sex drive.”
“Hey, don’t say that like it’s a bad thing!” Iris complained while crossing her arms and pouting. “There are a lot of guys out there who would like a girl who would do it at the drop of a hat.”
“The spirit is willing but the body is weak and requires rest, that’s all I’m saying,” Arylos said while sitting down to lace up his boots, learning his lesson. “Come on now, don’t you want to play with Aniya?”
“Fine,” Iris grumbled as she took her jacket and tightened it around her before reaching for her boots. “You know, we could have our own kids?”
“You know that won’t happen,” Arylos reminded Iris with a growl as he stood back up and leaned against the door to wait for Iris.
“Yes yes I know, different species and all that, but your body is human enough,” Iris reminded while gesturing towards Arylos. “All of the other parts are working right so why not?”
“For starters, this body is practically a corpse; the fact that the ‘parts’ you’re interested in are working is me making it all work,” Arylos reminded her with a hint of embarrassment coming to him. “Secondly, even if I could give you a human child, we’re missing one key component; my soul.”
“Your soul? What do you mean?” Iris asked as she finished lacing her shoes and reached for gloves to put on.
Arylos groaned, trying to find a way to explain this to a girl who doesn’t even know why he was biologically sterile to her. “You are formed from three things; mind, body, and soul. A child gains mind when they gain consciousness, they gain their body through our union as their body grows from yours. However the soul is made from both of the parents’ souls.”
“What, like half of my soul and half of your soul creates the soul of our kid?” Iris asked as she lifted the hood of her jacket and stood up.
“Exactly, and I’m not ‘alive’ by the same definition as you,” Arylos explained while stroking his beard. “I have no soul per se; my soul is really just the endless flames that is my existence. So our child would have half a human soul and half a soul of infinite fire. They would be a tortured being, torn between their mortality and the Titanic soul they gained from me.”
“So you mean it? You cannot give me a child of our own?” Iris asked as she approached Arylos.
Arylos slowly nodded, feeling shame come to him. “But that doesn’t mean we don’t have options. There are plenty of children out there looking for good homes. We can always adopt.”
“But they won’t be ours,” Iris returned as she rubbed her arms.
“We’ll love them as any parent would; it doesn’t matter if they share blood with us or not,” Arylos assured with a smile.
Iris thought about the idea for a while before shaking her head. “No, it wouldn’t be the same. You see, I’m an only child so if we adopt and I don’t have kids of my own, that means that my bloodline ends with me. That just doesn’t sit right with me, especially since I carry Templarian blood. Think about it, the Templarian blood in me survived the Dragon Wars; it wouldn’t be right for that bloodline to just die with me.”
“It’s your choice,” Arylos said softly.
“And my choice can end my bloodline,” Iris retaliated immediately. “I don’t have any extended family, none that I know of. So who knows if there are others in my family out there. If there aren’t, it just doesn’t feel right. Wouldn’t it be like you if you died? If you die, there will be no more Titans.”
“But my people deserve to be forgotten, that’s the difference,” Arylos said softly with a nod, starting to understand Iris’s fears. “And that’s not a decision you feel you can make for your own family.”
“Exactly,” Iris said while wrapping a scarf around her face.
“Well, if that’s your concern, there are other men out there who are capable of giving you what you want,” Arylos said softly, as if he didn’t want to suggest it. “It’s a failure on my part, so you shouldn’t have to suffer for my own failures.”
“Are you suggesting I find a guy out there and have a one night stand with him just to have a kid?” Iris asked, a part of her disgusted by the idea.
Arylos thought about it, hearing his suggestion said aloud without the veil of trying to soften the blow. “If that would make you happy, you know that’s–”
“Nope, not having it,” Iris said with a stern laugh. “A little thing about relationships honey; we’re exclusive to each other, no matter what happens. I’m sure you wouldn’t want me going around with another guy just as much as I wouldn’t like you going around with another girl. I don’t want to do that to us.”
Arylos thought about her words for a moment as he looked at her, the seriousness in her eyes burning through like hot coals. “Are you sure about that?”
“Yes, I’m sure,” Iris said with a quick nod before she looked away out of embarrassment. “I was the patriarch’s daughter, remember that. I’ve had my fill of guys who I had to share because my only use to them was for them to be patriarch. Get your heart broken enough, you don’t wish it on others.”
“That happened? Really?” Arylos asked out of concern.
Iris slowly nodded as she gripped her sleeves tight. “I was past normal marrying age when I found you. You think Yokubo was the worst I’ve had to deal with? No; he was just the most blunt one.”
Arylos sighed as he pushed away from the door and approached Iris, wanting to hold her but wondering if a man touching her was what she wanted right now. “I didn’t know, I’m sorry,” he said softly, lowering his hands.
“No, don’t be,” Iris quickly corrected. “You’ve been a lot better than the other guys I’ve tried to have a relationship with. Don’t let their failures get to you; you’re doing a lot better than you think.”
“Do you really think that?” Arylos asked softly, feeling embarrassment come to him.
“I know that,” Iris said while resting a hand on Arylos’s chest. “And I know that I want our family, not some random guy’s.”
Arylos held her hand and nodded slowly as a sharp pain ran through his still heart. “I’m sorry,” he said softly as he looked down at her gloved hand and held it tightly. “I don’t have a body in this world, Iris.”
“And? I’m okay with the bodies you possess so long as you don’t do anything stupid,” Iris assured with a warm smile.
“It’s not that,” Arylos corrected as the shame built up in him. “I have no body of my own, not one in this world. That means that I must take a vessel to be with you. Even if we get past the other issues, the child you bear will not be mine; it will be my vessel’s.”
Iris tilted her head to the side as she thought about what Arylos was telling her. “You mean to tell me that even in the best case scenario, it’s still some random guy’s kid, right?”
Arylos groaned as he nodded. “Exactly; you’ll have to face that one way or another.”
Iris nodded as she looked down, realizing just what falling in love with a formless Titan required of her. She looked back up at Arylos, at his burning red eyes, and she could still only see the Titan within, not the man on the outside. She sniffled softly and approached Arylos and hugged him, feeling his inadequacies. She wanted to comfort him as best as she could.
“You’re still the man I love; nothing will change that,” Iris said softly, tightening her hold on the Titan so she would never lose him.