Novels2Search
The First Flame
125. I’m Just a Hollow Moon You Colorised

125. I’m Just a Hollow Moon You Colorised

Arylos enjoyed a nighttime walk along the beach, taking in the roar of the crashing waves and the dark of the night. The cool breeze gave him a comforting chill that warmed his old bones with the embrace of a peaceful death. He let out a sigh as he took in the light of the moons overhead, bathing him in white and red light. As he looked to the sky, he could see the telltale black sphere of the black moon, silent and everwatching with its black light.

Arylos cracked a smile as he took in the quiet of the city as the lights faded into the night. The peace it gave him stirred his dead heart. The Titan sat down in the sand and looked out to the azure ocean and enjoyed the serenity. He felt laughter come to him as he became self-conscious of himself.

A Titan who had taken a mortal consort. It was not unheard of, even amongst his own kind, but it was absurd to think of Arylos to think of himself. For him to come this far to seek a peaceful life, for him to let what he really is fade away to this level, Arylos felt as though his own identity had faded away leaving him nothing but his meaningless name. Zjornfernheim, the Elder Titan of Fire, the last of the Vlajhilsen to hail from Mortehksun at the edge of reality, a formless creature of shadow and flame, the first flame of reality.

All of it was meaningless now; he was now Arylos and he belonged to Iris.

Arylos felt tears come to him as he reminisced on the last year and a half. He realised that Iris had done exactly what he wanted. She had taken away everything he was; the Titan of Fire was now dead, his name of Zjornfernheim now meaningless, his titles now hollow and empty. He was now her Arylos and that was all he needed to be.

Arylos wiped the tears from his eyes as the pain of who he was slipped away. He was no longer pretending to be human. He became everything she needed him to be, everything he wanted to be.

“Someone couldn’t sleep, huh?” a familiar woman’s voice said, accompanied by approaching footsteps in the sand.

Arylos looked over and saw Bellona approaching wearing a dark red yokui and holding a glass bottle in her arms. Arylos sighed as he tried to hide his tears from her. “One could say that, yeah,” he said softly while clearing his throat.

“Why are you out here? I figured you wouldn’t leave Iris alone,” Bellona asked in concern.

“She’s fast asleep; she’ll be fine, I just needed some time alone to think,” Arylos said while waving his hand.

“Think about what exactly?” Bellona asked while sitting down next to Arylos.

Arylos sighed and looked up at the sky, finding the site of familiar worlds amongst the stars. “How lucky yet unlucky I am. A lifetime of surviving, running, fighting. Now I have the chance to live.”

“What do you mean?” Bellona asked softly.

Arylos took in the cool breeze and closed his eyes as he centred himself mentally. “To my people, I was either an outcast or an elder god. After my world died, I fled and tried to find meaning in the eternal life I have left. Yet I was constantly fighting, running, trying desperately to keep going. What was it all for? I’ve spent so long trying to survive that I forgot how to live. I’ve craved death yet I find no purpose in it.”

“That’s depressing, even for you,” Bellona said softly, trying to cheer Arylos up. “What if I were to kill you? Or if Anoron could kill you? What would you think then?”

“‘Please bring me to an end’,” Arylos responded without hesitation.

“Oh come on, you can be more original than that; use your imagination,” Bellona teased while patting Arylos’s back.

“I don’t have to,” Arylos said sternly while looking at Bellona with his glowing red eyes.

Bellona regretted what she said and turned away in shame, forgetting Arylos’s breakdown earlier in the year. “I’m sorry,” she said softly.

“No, it’s fine,” Arylos said while turning back to the umbral sky. “You and I are different; you think of me as a god of war because of what I am capable of. You forget that I have had to live with what I did and live with the consequences. You enjoy wars and the glory they bring you; I can only think of those caught in the crossfire.”

Bellona nodded slowly, understanding Arylos’s pain. “The people who just want to live their lives in peace. The villagers who wanted to be left alone. The families who stand to lose everything.”

This tale has been unlawfully lifted without the author's consent. Report any appearances on Amazon.

“People just like me,” Arylos interjected while rubbing his forearms.

Bellona let out a sigh, beginning to understand the guilt inside the Titan. “That’s why you were furious when Reyz killed those people,” she said while resting her hand on Arylos’s shoulder. “You blame yourself for Reyz coming to Sentoraya and those people had nothing to do between the two of you.”

“Had I not moved to Sentoraya, those people would still be alive,” Arylos said mournfully. “Had I not taken this body, he wouldn’t have done that. Had Iris not awoken me, none of this–” Arylos stopped himself as tears began to fall down his cheeks. He couldn’t bring himself to say it as he realised where his mind was going.

“None of this would have happened,” Bellona finished for the Titan while rubbing his back. “Sure, those people would have still been alive, Nageki would have lived, Eir would still have her wings. But you also wouldn’t have Iris, would you? You wouldn’t be here, enjoying this month of peace, would you? You and I wouldn’t be here, talking through our problems, would we? You wouldn’t have a home with a girl who loves you very much and makes you happy, would you?”

Arylos swallowed a lump in his throat as he curled up and covered his face. The Titan couldn’t help but cry as the pain broke him. The probabilities came to him and broke him down, realising just how impossible this would be. The fluke that led him to this moment could have easily never happened. He could have sent another three thousand years as a broken corpse in a forgotten temple.

The finite nature of life broke his heart as he cried.

“I want it to last forever, but it won’t happen, will it?” Arylos said softly while rubbing his eyes.

Bellona let out a sigh as she tried to find words to comfort him. “That’s why humans live day-to-day and say things like ‘I love you’ every night before bed; nothing lasts forever.”

“I do,” Arylos said in a cold and sad voice. “Even when Templarius dies, when reality fades into nothingness, I will remain. The only thing that lives forever is death.”

Bellona let go of Arylos and wrapped her arms around herself, finding herself unable to comfort Arylos. “So now that you understand mortal life and have a chance to have it for yourself, you realise just how temporary it is; how it will all be gone the next day and there’s nothing you can do about it.”

Arylos contained himself as he rubbed his eyes. “And there’s not much time left,” he said softly.

“You mean the Eikons you talked about?” Bellona asked.

Arylos nodded and dug his nails into his arms. “Reyz was freed by the Eikons. Since the day we fought, they have been silent except for Enigma infecting Baldr. Think about it; I defeated Reyz and killed Enigma yet they have been silent this whole time.”

“They could have been isolated incidents,” Bellona suggested while trying to think through the problem. “Maybe Baldr was not meant for you when Reyz was.”

“No, they coordinate their efforts to maximise efficiency,” Arylos said while shaking his head. “They take any and all measures to complete their work. They do not act independently; every action they take is for their end goal. There was a reason Enigma came after me, there was a reason they released Reyz.”

“What makes you so certain?” Bellona asked.

“Because Oldalthur was not an isolated incident,” Arylos said as his nails drew blood from his skin. “Oldalthur showed signs of corruption; he was turning into an Eikon. That is three incidents involving them over the past year and a half. This cannot be isolated; I killed Oldalthur, then Baldr came after me with Reyz joining him not long afterwards.”

“And you think they’re coming after you?” Bellona asked while rubbing her arms for warmth.

“They hate all life, but they hate me the most,” Arylos said with a deep sigh as he tried to relax himself. “My time here is short; my peaceful life is coming to an end far too soon. It won’t be long before I’ll have to run headfirst into them once more and fight their horrid war as I’ve always done.”

“And what about Iris? You think she’ll stand for that?” Bellona asked in a stern voice.

Arylos sighed as he turned away from Bellona. “She will have to stay here. She cannot get involved.”

“You know that’s bullshit, right?” Bellona scoffed in frustration. “You know that if you go running off to kill Eikons that she’ll chase after you. You’re not going to dump her so you can fight them; she won’t allow it.”

“She has to stay out of the way,” Arylos said in a soft growl as his disappointment grew.

“And why is that?” Bellona asked.

“Because I can’t lose her!” Arylos roared while turning around quickly and baring his fangs for Bellona as flames welled up in his throat. Bellona didn’t move as she watched Arylos’s slit pupil eyes slowly return to normal as he tried to control himself again. “She’ll be caught in the crossfire of a war she’ll never win. I can’t lose her, not to them,” he said softly while calming himself down.

Bellona sighed and pulled the cork off the bottle she had and handed it to Arylos. Arylos eyed the bottle before slowly taking it from Bellona and took a drink, feeling the burn of the alcohol down his throat.

“I know you’re afraid, we all are, but that doesn’t mean you can just dump your girlfriend and fight a war against machines,” Bellona said with a warm smile. “If you do that, she’ll run after you and drag you back home kicking and screaming. Go ahead and run off and tell that little girl that she can’t come with you.”

Arylos laughed as he handed the bottle back to Bellona and she took a drink from it. “I tried that when Reyz came for me and she still ran after me. It really is hopeless, isn’t it?”

“Hey, you wanted her; you should have known the consequences,” Bellona said while wiping her mouth. “She’s an attention seeking girl with abandonment issues. She’s your problem now.”

“Yeah, she’s my problem,” Arylos said as he laughed softly. “But she’s my problem just as I am hers.”