Calista stopped and pulled a random book off the nearest shelf. Flipping it open, she turned to the last page. Sure enough, words were appearing on the book’s final page as though they were writing themselves. There was even the sound of a pen scratching parchment, though no instrument was visible. She looked up to see Lefty standing next to her, his mouth agape, as he stared down at the same page. The mage was following the writing as it appeared, silently mouthing each word. When the writing neared the bottom of the last page, a small ‘poof!’ of smoke appeared against the cover as another page magically appeared just in time for the writing to continue.

“What’s it say?” Calista asked. “I can’t read whatever language this is.”

Lefty muttered a minor spell and then his eyes began to glow. “I … I think it’s telling about how this son of an earl was … out all night drinking … and then visited a whore house … and is now waking up in a gutter. He doesn’t have his shoes. No, wait … he doesn’t have one of his shoes and he’s wondering where he put the other one. Okay, he found that shoe … but it doesn’t fit … Neither of the shoes fit … They’re not the right shoes … They’re not his shoes at all, he thinks his shoes have been stolen along with all of his money. And his head hurts, very badly in fact …”

“Okay, we get it,” Calista shut the book and replaced it on the shelf. “I don’t know if I’ve ever seen something that’s both kinda cool and kind lame all at the same time.”

Lefty’s eyes were wide, “How is this lame? This is a horrifying amount of knowledge for anyone to have, let alone an evil wizard.”

Benson cut in, “Master Severin is not evil, he is morally ambiguous.”

Calista ignored the ghost, “It’s lame because it involves a bunch of reading. Everyone knows that reading in video games is boring because the writing is boring. If they were good writers, they’d be writing books and not video games.”

“I totally disagree with that,” Lefty replied.

Narene then leaned in, “Can we just keep going instead of arguing about a bunch of books we’re not going to use?”

You might be reading a stolen copy. Visit Royal Road for the authentic version.

“You’ve obviously been playing all the wrong video games,” Lefty continued.

“Ugh,” Calista threw back her head. “I’ve played plenty of games and all the writing is boring. I mean, I’m here to bash skulls, or find stuff, or make stuff, or steal stuff, or negotiate a peace treaty with an alien species and avert an intergalactic war. Not open some dusty tome on a shelf and read some useless piece of exposition written by some greaseball who’s read too much Greek mythology.”

Lefty did not back down, “You know, at heart I think you’re kind of a mean spirited person and I think you need to think about ways to better yourself.”

“Well I’ll have you know that I’m not as mean as I could be and I don’t think people like you are as grateful for that as they should be,” she replied.

“Oh, I see you’re adding conceited to your list of wonderful character traits. How nice,” the mage said.

“If you’d been carrying the team as hard as I’ve been, you’d probably be a lot more conceited than I am,” Calista snapped.

“Now you’re just being ironic.” Lefty rolled his eyes as he took the book from her and replaced it on the shelf.

Benson then interrupted them, Not sure what you guys are talking about, but hey, are we ready to move on with the tour?”

It was right then they heard the entrance door slam open followed by the clamor of boots and armor. Then a loud, gruff voice shouted, “Fan out! Two to a party. Stay together and keep your eyes peeled for that rogue and that wizard!”

Benson turned, “Oh my! If you don’t mind, I have to see to these guests and make sure they sign in before they make a mess of …”

“Wait-wait-wait-wait-wait-wait-wait-wait,” Calista jumped out in front of the ghost. “Do you mind showing us to that book first? We would really, really appreciate it since we’re in something of a rush.”

“Oh,” said Benson, surprised, “whatever could be the rush for a book from our humble little library?”

“It-it-it-it …” Calista stammered.

“It’s a treasure hunt!” Lefty cut in.

“Exactly!” Calista continued. “It’s a treasure hunt and we need that book and the guys behind us are cheating, okay? If they don’t sign in on the book like we did then they’re in big trouble. Okay?”

“We just really need you to help us stay ahead of them so we can beat them fair and square,” Lefty added.

Benson shot a glare toward the entrance as he seemed to steel himself. “I understand completely. Follow me.”