Two hours is a long time when all you can do is sit at the bottom of a pitch black sphere. And there is the problem of saving Beowulf's persona. People know there is a monster inside.
"Petal, I'm going to harvest arms and legs here. Look the other side."
"Wow, why is that? Is your self-loathing that great? I would comfort you if I could, but I'm too small! Don't do that, silly!"
"No. I just thought of a plan to save Beowulf. I'm going to slay the monster that is threatening Colchester."
No! I know you did bad things, but to pay with your own life... It is too much! I can't agree with that!"
"I am not going to kill myself. I am going to kill the giant monster! As Beowulf!"
"But how are you going to be at two places at the same... Oh! Tehe, silly me!"
"Fly to the top of the sphere, it is going to get bloody in here."
The fairy flies to the top and I use force blade to sever my legs and both arms. Thanks to super regeneration a limb grows back in about six minutes. One hour later I got three full sets of colossal troll limbs. There is no reason for me to harvest only one if I'm going to do it. I also got about two dozen horns and a lot of skin and ribs.
"The plan is to make a colossus puppet and stay invisible in the sphere. The puppet will fly to the central square and we will intercept it there. We will claim the right to fight that monster, and I will sever the limbs one by one. In the end, we are going to use a magic that will only leave the skin and ribs behind. Of course, it will be an illusion. And there is where you enter. You will help me using the item box and with the illusions. I hope the guard don't meddle."
"Uh, I got it! It is going to be awesome! The monster rampages without killing anyone, and then the hero appears and woosh fights the monster and bam! Defeats the monster! You are some kind of genius, Grendel!"
"And you will keep protective coating and stay behind me all the time. Also, keep a light spell on you to make you glow. I want people to know I walk with a fairy."
We wait for another hour. It was so boring that Petal fell asleep but I picked up the slack and kep tc. When the humanization cooldown ended, I transformed into Beowulf once again. My lord's clothes were ruined just like some green guy with similar growth problems, so I changed into my adventurer's clothes.
"Petal, I'm ready. Wake up and let's go!"
She groans and slowly flutters up.
"Just one more candy! Oh, hey, Beowulf. Fancy seeing you here. Wherever 'here' is."
"Here we go! It is showtime, petal!" I miserably try to psyche her up. The fairy frowns. "I'm dispelling the sphere."
> Erm... Could you hold on doing that for that for a little while?
What the...
That was a system message window, not a chat room. What is going on? I dismiss it and find a puzzled Petal behind the window.
"Are you, like, setting your status or spending SP? I didn't see any changes though. Are you getting cold feet, hero? Cheer up, silly! We are going to pull it off!"
"Yes, right. Something odd happened, must be some glitch. The system is malfunctioning anyway. Nothing important, I'm sure of it..." No. I'm not sure, but I don't want to freak out. There is so many things going on that talking to the Mighty OZ might break something in me.
> I know you are a troll, but that is rude even for you. Don't you remember my message from when you ascended to the station of 'Hero'? Can you please talk to me?
Ok, time to freak out. Shit got real. Let me put the fairy in the loop first.
"Petal, there is someone trying to contact me through the system. Hey you, system person-thing, can you listen to me? What is going on?"
> Gracious heavens, finally. I wanted to have this conversation a long time ago, but there was a chance of being eavesdropped. Now that you are conveniently separated from the world in this dimensional bubble I could set secure communications.
Petal buzzes around my head and pulls my cheek to grab my attention. "Beowulf, who is it?"
"Someone in charge of the System, I think. Or the System is alive and we are going to need the skynewt protocols."
She puts a finger to her cheek and asks, "You need what part of a newt, again?"
I shrug. "Nevermind. System person-thing, can you open a chatrom beetween us two and you?"
Class [1] Intern System Operator requirements unlocked (1/2) Get us a starbrook deluxe decaff latte and we will promote you. Now get back to Earth, intern!
As if I could. Or wait... "is there a way to get back to Earth?"
> No. I am sorry, but not to my knowledge. The cycle of souls is deteriorated and we are cut off. I have a hunch on how you were able to be reincarnated here, but there is no way anyone is leaving this world alive. This was something Hero Bernstein left behind in case another one from their world came here.
> I think I can get around that requirement. There is a test for you they left behind, but I cannot understand it. Here you go.
Your job has changed to [1] Intern System Operator!
Enjoying this book? Seek out the original to ensure the author gets credit.
A window in English where I can actually interact and input stuff appeared. I can't believe what I am reading.
~$: Attempting login to system administrative interface. Requesting validation of origin. Starting pregenerated quiz script.
~$: What is the answer to life, the universe and everything else? > 42.
~$: So long and thanks for all the fish!
~$: Asuka or Rei? > Rei.
~$: Dude, gross. Do you really have a thing for your mom's clone?
~$: Red Pill or Blue Pill? > Blue Pill.
~$: There is no spoon.
~$: Bubblesaur, Charredmaned or Pipsqueaktle? > Peekandchew.
~$: Gotta catch them all.
~$: Godzilla and King Kong are fighting in Paris during a thunderstorm. Who loses? > Paris.
~$: Clever one.
~$: Where is the princess? > In another castle.
~$: Actually Awolo eloped with her back to Earth.
~$: How many chicks are there in your Harem right now? > 2.
~$: Dude, that is a love triangle! Go capture them' heroines. I'll give you one more chance.
~$: How many kemonomimis did you nail so far? > none.
~$: Mofu mofu >>>> life! You DT traitor!
~$: But there is a kemonomimi you have the hots for, right? > Yes.
~$: Don't waste time, bro. There is no New Game +. Go for the Mofu Mofu now!
~$: What is the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow? > An European or an African swallow?
~$: Whaaaaaaa! Splash.
~$: Last question. On a scale of 1 to 10, how OP are you compared to the mooks of this alternate world? > It's over 9,000!
~$: Cheater! Such MC'ness!
~$: Geek evaluation: 77%. You pass. How is your Isekai treating you?
~$: Login successful.
~$: Last operator login 2.352 e+11 seconds ago. Welcome.
~$: You have no query privileges.
~$: You have no command privileges.
~$: You did not bring the StarBrook Decaf Latte either.
~$: You were forcibly logged out. Grind those levels or warp back to Earth. Looooooolz.
Job change is locked until the level cap is reached, the Holy Decaf Latte is procured or the ultimate power of mofumofu moe is acknowledged. Good luck sucker!
How much time are 2.352 e+11 seconds, please? I bet these two heroes that built this system are long dead. Or I'll squeeze their puny human necks for not formatting their units. At least getting to the level cap of a tier 1 job is trivial now.
"What was that?"
> A test the Heroes of old left for you. Not for you, but for someone like you.
Administrative chat room created.
Intern System Operator Beowulf joined.
Fairy guide Petal joined.
Petal: Wow, a blue conversational thingie. Fancy. Who else is here?
Beowulf: You, me and 'someone else'. Hey, system person-thing, are you there?
> Yes. Let us begin. As I told you, being isolated in this dimensional bubble allows our communication to be secure. Allow me to introduce myself, I am the System. I was not always the System, but for the last seventy six centuries it has been so. I became one with the system by choice, so don't worry about that part. :) [https://www.royalroadcdn.com/public/smilies/smile.png]
Beowulf: If you say so. Before we continue, who was talking back when I answered that quiz?
> Nobody. Those were pregenerated answers left by the heroes. That quiz has some intelligence of its own, an echo of their own personalities. But nothing more than that.
Beowulf: They were a handful, I believe.
> Yes. They did turn the world upside down. Not literally, of course.
Beowulf: Of course. What do you need of me?
> Evil has followed you after it was confirmed that the path to this world was safe. And a third party, a hunter, has been sent to retrieve you both. Now the three of you are in the same continent. I'm afraid that you can't survive an encounter with any of them as you are now.
Beowulf: What should I do then? Run away? Are they coming here? Were they the ones behind Kareena?
> No. That was the Guild trying to eliminate you. They are afraid of you and aware of your identity. That was a trollbane sword. But don't fool yourself thinking it is over. And don't go hunting the Guild. It will only aggravate their response.
Beowulf: No wonder it was able to cut my neck. Now, to the point. You need my help for something, right? I don't think you would go through all this just to warn me that someone is hunting me.
> Yes. Since evil arrived in this world, he is trying to regain access into the System. So far I have blocked his intrusion, but It takes too much effort. I need your help to fix the System.
Beowulf: I have seen some inconsistencies and glitches. How do I help?
> Gain access to the Administrator class. You will need to level up this new class you got. Until you do, we won't be able to talk again. But I will be watching you.
Beowulf: Do we have some time limit? How soon is this?
> I don't know, but I can hold for at least one more year. Get to a position of power in the world. You will need to fight the Evil but not because of some lofty goal like justice. Because the fight will come to you even if you don't want it.
Beowulf: Does evil has a name? Or a face?
> Yes.
Beowulf: And you are not going to tell me. Nice. It doesn't take a genius to put two and two together, do you know? I'm pretty sure I can guess who this 'Evil' is and who it was. What a mess.
Petal: Calm down!
> I'm sorry.
Beowulf: Is this one of those 'don't speak his name or you'll give him power' thing?
> No.
Beowulf: I don't care. My guess is that there is a ton of water under the bridge and you are holding a millenia long grudge. Be my guest if you want someone to talk to and take a load off of your chest. Yay for me! One more class tree to grind and reap bonuses. That is good enough. Sorry if my burst offended you.
Petal: Beowulf! That is low even for you. I'm sorry for my companion, System.
> I am the one asking for help.
Petal: Still doesn't give this silly entitled thorn the right to be stingy. Beowulf, apologize!
Beowulf: Yes, mom.
Petal: I give up. I guess you did lose your head today.
Beowulf: ...
Petal: C'mon, laugh! Hey, System, is there like an anger management skill? Or one to be nice?
> I'm afraid he already have them. You should get going now. I don't recommend exposing yourself too much. Reconsider your theatrical plan and just retreat quietly. The count has skilled people to see through your farce.
Beowulf: Yeah, I think I will go with your advice. But couldn't we have this talk before I had to cut off my own limbs?
> Hindsight is 20/20, Bernstein used to tell me.
Petal: Where do you see from? Are these the fabled 'eyes on your back' thing?
> I no longer have actual eyes. Or any other body part.
Petal: Oh, it is a metaphor.
Beowulf: The word means looking back in time.
Petal: I know, silly! I really do! You look so cute when you do this frown thing when you are explaining the obvious to me. Catch me, I'm going to swoon.
Beowulf: Wow, sarcasm!
Petal: You're always welcome. I live to serve the master.
Beowulf: Knock it off.
Petal: Aye, sir.
> I will leave the two of you to your comedy routine then. Until we meet again.
The chatroom was dismissed, leaving both of us in the boring mirrored dimensional sphere.
"Let's get invisible and return home."
"Sounds like a plan to me, boss."