I was expecting to just get some treasure from the guild vault like this big pemadra I am sensing, but it seems that now I will have to really piss off Kareena. I wasn't expecting that third requirement, but now that it is revealed, it is kinda obvious. Well, I'll think about that when I win this duel.

The angry receptionist guides me to the arena. It is crowded. Everyone loves a nice bloodbath. I guarantee you won't be disappointed. I walk into the exposed area, and people start booing me. I don't care. Come, help me level my thick skin. Zahariel, Helen and Marcy are sitting on a bench on a side of the arena. There are five receptionists on the other side. No. Kareena with two receptionists on each side.

I make some boxing moves to warm up. Someone calls me crazy, other calls me suicidal. I reach the bench, and sit in the middle of the two girls.

The scornful receptionist steps up the dais and yells at me "Are you ready?" I stand up, and take the cloak and robe off.

A big commotion happens when my figure with a loincloth appears. I don't think I am that bad physically speaking. Anyway, up the dais I go. "Ready!" I answer the snarling receptionist.

"In the south side, the villager that had to try four times just to job change, the self proclaimed hero Beowulf!" More booing. Some squishy fruits fly in my direction and burst when I am hit. Have your fun, I'm getting the last laugh.

"Just kneel and die you idiot!" "Finish this bastard already!" Insults fly amidst the booing and the fruits. Are you sure you should be wasting food? Winter is coming.

"In the north side, the beloved guild master of our town! A-rank adventurer Kareena the Heartseeker!" Cheering and whistles erupt in the arena. I am spared of yet another round of fruit. Kareena steps up the dais with a pretty sword up her waist. She is wearing a leather armor with metal rivets. Some people throw flowers at her feet.

"Are you ready to die, Beowulf? I'll give you a chance to flee. Surrender your guild card and I'll spare your life." I pay her no mind. I am too busy removing fruit from my body and hair.

"Nah. Everyone came here to see a bloodbath, lets get over with it." I look at her with my scornful face. "What are you using first?"

"I'll be merciful. I will use my {Heartseeker Blade} to finish you off. It is a technique that cannot be dodged, always hit and if the enemy has a heart it will be pierced."

"Nice, nice. A clean cut? Bring it on." Clean cuts are easier to regen. I move up close to her and stop with my hands behind my back. "C'mon, start! Show me how an A-rank adventurer fights."

She looks at me with disbelief. Slowly her sword is drawn, and she takes a combat stance. "Heartseeker Blade!" she yells. Good girl.

I am pierced through and through between the ribs on my left side. Blood spurts on her as she remove her sword from the wound. You don't know where I've been, Tyler... I hear yelling for a moment before my body shuts down.

I fall flat on my back due to system shock. My HP didn't go to zero, but got dangerously close. One thing I noticed is that the basic HP tick timer for a human is much longer than a troll's. But being divided by 27 means I didn't have to trigger vitality booster. The bleeding stops, my heart starts beating again and I regan control of my body.

I gasp for air. I spent a couple minutes without breathing. Cough some blood, clear the throat and sit up. "Nice move!" I give her a thumbs up. Oi, close your mouth.

"You are alive! How!" Here, have my best toothpaste ad smile. Everywhere, silence. Except for Zahariel, that is rolling on the bench laughing.

"I'm a hero! How do you think I was able to defeat an orc prince? I can't die." I stand up and stretch my neck. "Do you want to wait the full 20 minutes, or can I have my turn now?"

"What? Is it not over?" The bitching receptionist and close aide to Kareena is in denial.

"Of course not. It is not dawn yet. C'mon, do you want to wait or can I go now?"

"Wha-what are you doing now? I'm not ready yet." Breaking your body would be too easy but completely useless. I need to break something deeper, and the first chink was already dealt.

"I don't have to tell you. The contract just states that you have to call your shots, not me. Steel yourself." I move back to fruit-covered side of the dais. "And remember, you can't counterattack. But feel free to dodge or parry my powerful attack! Can I go now?"

The crowd is booing, but with less enthusiasm than before.

"You can come. I am ready for you!"

"Good. Take my powerful attack." I make some faux kung fu motions, and pretend to run to her. "{Snowball Throw}!" Bang! Headshot. She was watching my feet and hands, and missed the backhand snowball I tossed on her face.

Skill Frost Magic level 2 acquired.

"What? How did you get ice magic as an apprentice magician?" She asks after clearing her face. My retort is that this is not even ice magic, it is frost magic. There are some reddish bruises. It seems she got frostbitten. Those piling up multipliers are weird. First strike, dirty tricks, etc, etc.

Unauthorized use of content: if you find this story on Amazon, report the violation.

"Not telling. I don't need to wait for your next attack. Just tell what are you using."

"I must have missed your heart the first time. {Heartseeker Blade}!" More blood splashes her on the face and armor, and again I fall down.

{Vitality Booster} auto-trigger.

A few minutes later, I recover my senses. She must've put way more effort in this attack now. I raise myself and sit on the floor. The crowd is dead silent. "Hey, did you use any boosters? I felt a bit more than a sting this time." Again I give her the thumbs up after standing up.

"HOW? How can you be alive?" Despair is setting in.

"I'm a hero." I make a guts pose. "Heroes never die!" Someone slowclaps alone. It was Zahariel.

"Show them how it is done big bro Beowulf!" He yells.

"Can we wait the full 20 minutes this time?" She meekly asks.

"Sure. Let me grab a bite from the guild BBQ." Today's menu: wolf meat. Stringy but filling. I eat my fill while Vitality Booster cools down. "Ready here! Please step forward to receive your punishment."

She can't backoff but there is a visible delay while she steels her resolve to step back in the dais. "Now what? Another snowball?"

"Nah. I wanna grind the other skills too. My next one will be up close, ready yourself." She falls naturally into her stance, showing how much sword training she had. [Instant Movement] to her back, and a well-delivered slap on her butt. She wasn't even able to react.

"❤ Kyaaa! ❤" She lets some weird voice out. For some reason I am blatantly ignoring right now, her face is even more red than the frostbites. Is her inner M awakening?

It is better to take some distance before something happens. "Wanna wait? Or will you come straight at me?" I'll keep taunting her. No leeway to let her think straight.

"If you are so heartless that you refuse to die, I will just sever your head from the neck!" She dashes at me and lashes out with a fierce horizontal slash.

"[Full Defense]!" I dodge by the skin of my teeth. "Missed!" I call the veredict.

After some hours of burning, splashing with water, stabbing in the groin, slipping on a frozen pool of blood, stabbing in the stomach, leg sweeps, arm throws, stabbing in the kidneys, grinding with sand and a dozen heartseeker wounds, both of us are tired. The arena's dais is a bloody pool. I think there are at least five gallons of blood all around. Suck it up, Saint Bronze Knights. I can do it too. Zahariel and Helen are sleeping in Marcy's lap. Most of the audience left. The few awake receptionists are a nervous mess.

I got a good skill grinding out of this ordeal.

"Are you ready to give up? Dawn is almost upon us."

"You... huff... You cannot be... cough... human!"

"What a preposterous accusation. A monster adventurer? Who'd think of that? My status window has HUMAN written on it. I am this way since I was born."

"Can you even die?"

"I don't know. And I tried to get killed in a lot of ways already. By the way, whose turn is it now?"

"I... wheeze... don't care. Come at me! Stop playing around, Beowulf! I am not your toy." This is not toying with you. I am trolling you to the best of my ability.

"Can I do it? I mean, how is your HP? Hey, guild people, can someone heal Kareena? I am pulling a big one next. Medic!!"

The library girl receptionist stands up and heals Kareena. "I'm ready, come at me!" the guild master snarls.

"Here I go. My undefeatable sure-kill technique. Hero Knife Hand!" Shit, should've thought of a cooler name. I charge her, and lash out with a knife hand chop. She parries with her blade. Using [Emperor's Might] level 6 I strike the flat side of the sword right next to the guard.

The blade shatters in hundreds of pieces. I guess it was pretty battered already from being bashed through my ribs without maintenance all this time.

"My sword!" She falls to her knees and drops the bladeless hilt to assume the famous ORZ position.  "I give up! I give up! You won! Please let me sleep!" Strenght fails as she loses the last of her resolve and falls face-first into a puddle of blood. The few receptionists that are not sleeping rush to recover their leader.

I approach them. "Sorry, lass, what is your name?" I ask the librarian girl.

"Imayne, sir hero." She timidly answers while avoiding me. No offense. I don't want to touch myself either.

"You wrote the contract. Who won?"

"You did, sir hero Beowulf."

"Good. Is there a place where I can take a bath? I'm rather unsightly."

"Yes, there is a bath area for guild personnel, but I don't think anyone will mind it if you take it for yourself."

Her wording is troubling me for some reason. "Know what? I'll just wake Helen up and ask her to use lifestyle magic on me."

Thinking about that before reaching the bench, I come to a conclusion. Cunning little girl. If I took the bath for me, it would be considered my reward, right?. I left my guard open that moment. She almost ruined everything. Back at my 'corner' of the rink I call for Helen to wake up and she agrees to clean me for free. 10/10 would return again. Not like these angsty guild personnel, my girlf... bride is. I don my robe and cloak, it is rather cold right now.

Now all that is left is to claim the final step to the skill unlock and my rank.

Skill Frost Magic level 4 acquired. Skill Earth Magic level 3 acquired Skill Taunt level 2 awakened. Skill Fire Magic level 4 acquired. Skill Max MP Increase level 2 acquired. Skill Dirty Tricks level 5 acquired. Skill Water Magic level 3 acquired. Skill Max HP Increase level 5 acquired. Skill Evasion level 7 acquired.

Technique {Defensive Roll} learned.