Late March.

Well, well. Who do we have here?

"I see that this place is still as gray as ever. And you look just as handsome, Kuro."

Yeah. Like I have a face.

It was a tough day at work earlier so I guess I landed early.

"I really did want to sleep early for this, but even I didn't expect that I'd fall asleep quickly."

Huh, that's new to hear, expecting this I mean. Well, it's been a while since we chatted like this.

This world, technically, isn't real. This is a fabrication of my mind, and it absolutely doesn't make sense but I am inside my mind inside through my once dark inner psyche named Kuro, who literally appears like a shadow, but solid. That's something that you already know, however.

But one thing I didn't really explain is that since this is my mind or might I say my world within my cognition, I have control over it… well, unless if I get totally derailed like in the past. Whatever that is within the capacity of my mind, I can "materialize" in this gray box. Or heck, I can even replace the entire scene with something greatly different as long as it is within my memory. In addition, I can also create things, although virtually not real.

Even I can go on a limb and do hand signs to make myself a shadow clone.

But it seems that even the infiltrator of my mind has caught wind of that information.

I kicked a sofa that appeared out of nowhere towards G as an invitation to sit, and from his hand, a mechanical pencil appeared on his right hand without my will. I wasn't surprised, however.

I didn't know that you can pen spin now?

"I practiced when I wasn't busy. But I guess one really has to go on a stretch to surprise you, huh."

First we were coinciding existences, and now we found out that in our unexplainable case, our mind are somehow linked.

"Maybe we have similar neural signatures? Is that even a thing…?" he shook his hands on the air unceremoniously, "But that's probably why I was able to do this."

At least our openings in chess are different. Why do we not use a timer again?

"Because you always forget that there is an increment, you idiot."

And thus, the reason why we take two hours in one game.

Anyway, you were expecting this you said. You have something to tell, then?

"Yeah… I just want to get this out of my chest since I really can't talk about this with any person. But getting a firsthand look at your past, I don't expect you to say any advice."

Well, that's probably the most sensitive thing you've said to me.

"Shouldn't it be insensitive?"

Not in my case, I/Kuro shrugged.

"I wish I was peculiar as you.

But seriously… I've been getting very mentally unstable for the past few months."

…

"Oh hey, that's my normal state," is what I just kept to myself. Funny how I can still think silently when I'm literally inside my noggin.

"Has it ever happened to you that you tend to get mad so quickly on literally the smallest things?"

I had that phase. How bad has it gotten to you?

"…Literally every single day on the things that should be normal on that basis. I mean, like, the things people do everyday.

I get absolutely annoyed whenever the TV—just for an example—is turned on because it's so loud and I just want absolute silence for the entire day. That happens around the clock, and then there will be times where my emotions go haywire to the point that I'm pulling my hair and feel like going insane."

Is it different from when you lost yourself back in Chikami?

"Very… That time, I was immediately out of it. But now you feel that you're slowly blanking out. The noise feels like it's destroying my head… and there are many instances where I just watch punch our something into oblivion.

Thankfully, it doesn't happen in school. But in a way, it kind of sounds childish yet to an extreme. I'm not even surprised if a doctor tells me that I have some kind of phobia to certain loudness."

Hmm. Does that happen in the middle of sleep?

"Most of the time when it's morning and it is a day off. I just want to sleep in-

I also think that I have minor insomnia and I absolutely hate it when I get woke up, no, at this point my sleep is so bad that even the littlest sound wakes me up. I think that those things factor in to one thing. I'm just too stressed… that I might be depressed at this point."

I can't blame you, but please tell me that you've told this to Yui.

"I have, difficultly. I almost lashed out on her one time, and my guilt can't hide it anymore."

Oh thank apples…

This might not be the best time to ask you since I feel like this is also one factor, but have you made a decision already?

"N-Not yet…"

Our mind works similarly, and I just want you to choose what really is the best for you. Without me telling you, I know that you already have an idea of what my opinion will be. On the grand scheme of things, I don't really know much about your circumstances, but you have my support.

It just happened that we.are different from others on the way we think. People won't just get the irrationalities that we suffer. May it be petty or shallow, it is a big deal to us, moreso for me.

I however am very biased. That's the most objective that I can be, and now I'll say what I really want to. I would be excited for this two months to end.

"You've basically entered my inner psyche at this point."

Well yes. That's just payback for entering my inner psyche first.

"I really should settle to a proper decision soon… but that's easier said than done. When I thought that I have the scope of my issues, things just keep adding up.

…

Actually, does it make you lose it whenever something is left open in your house?"

That's a sudden change in topic…

But Haku is proactive. I do get annoyed when Sis leaves some stuff when she was living here, but I'd guess that your heightened emotions affect that.

"Hahh… I don't know anymore. Either I have insomia, depression, OCD, or all at the same time… I couldn't care less anymore."

Do you tell them off sometimes?

"Do we really look like someone that would do that? Two peas in a pod; we're excessively reserved."

You have one darn good point.

"In the end, the only I can do is escape reality.

So on that note, can you generate a scrabble board?"

Do you memorize the number of the tiles and their points? I only know how the board looks like.

"I'm on it."

▪ ▪ ▪

‹Ginji›

As I have said, it is very different from that time when I suddenly got to tap on Gin's memories for the first time. This time, I am indeed broken, and it scares me that I am aware of it.

I don't know anymore if it is my generalization of logic that is changing or not, but regardless, I am in a brink of distortion if this does not stop. Ever since I have awakened to the oversight I made as I entered CSU, my mental health went downhill. The only things that are pulling me up is my studies as long as I am still having fine, and the hobbies that I perpetually use to immaturely escape my problems.

Thus, the unhealthiness of my mind.

~ ~ ~

In rare occasions, where I am calm and pacified, and with my mind unoccupied, I do find myself borrowing a kitchen on the neighboring building used by the culinary students. I suppose that that is also one of the things that keep me from going sideways—cooking, that is. And it delights me when what I make turns out to be good.

"Nice."

And so I step outside with paper food boxes filled and walked out of the building as I let the food cool down a little. It's not everyday anymore that I get to be excited apart from when one of my favorite fluff manga gets adapted to an anime, but what I'm getting at is that it has been a while since I had lunch together with Yui.

Stolen from Royal Road, this story should be reported if encountered on Amazon.

"Well, please dig in."

If you are thinking that I basically see Yui almost everyday especially since we are on the same building, you would be right. But something has changed a bit, and it is my fault as to why. I painfully got into an agreement that we should lessen our time together for the reason that we don't want to hurt each other. But on my side, what would happen is that I would ultimately just hurt her eventually if I don't get my things sorted out.

The best thing that I can compare to our current relationship right now is the past pandemic's statistical graphs—for so long, we are sitting on a flattened curve without any improvements on our relationship whatsoever.

But amidst that, I am still clinging to my hope.

"You know, I just don't realize it but I actually don't frequently get to taste what you make."

"Is that so? That's the same for me though," I teased, in which she didn't realize that I was joking.

"Should I make you something to cheer you up then?"

In the end, I was the one that got teased.

"I would be happy to…"

"But really, even if we don't get to meet as usually, I want it to be something meaningful. As much as possible, when you're with me, I would appreciate it if you speak out your mind, Ginji. It will put me at ease too."

"I'll try to be more open… But at least I have talked to Gin about this. It helped, but it felt like I still need a lot more time to think.

And these days, I have finally started to focus more on what I should be doing this entire time."

"That… It's about what you should do after this school year… right?"

"Yes… But stress got the better of me and I got my tracks all over the place. Finally, I think I'll be able to think it through well."

"Just like I told you, I will respect the decision that you will make. But I just want you to see for yourself what really is the best for you. Of course I am very aware of your feelings, but for a moment, please think of yourself first and then the others.

I say that, but knowing you and your case, I think that it would be better for you to think about this alone before with others."

"Hahaha… I may have friends but I'm still a loner inside, huh. But thank you. Whenever I get the time, I will do that."

▪ ▪ ▪

May.

‹Gin›

What is this, an online meeting where I send an invitation link to only the people I want in the meeting room?

Analogy it is, but G suddenly asked if he can crash in on my cognitive realm again. If my guesses are correct, I would expect him to be a bit late in the meeting room if he is truly suffering from insomnia, so I slept on my normal pace and placed the hosting rights on Kuro.

Apples, I sure am loving this metaphor.

"Heeeeyyyy~ Kuro? You here or something dude? I just want to ask you something, really. This wouldn't take long."

Behind you~

"…!

Ok, I admit I was a bit startled… Don't surprise me like that, man. I would hate you if you suddenly wake me up…"

"Then that would mean that you'll basically hate yourself," is what I didn't say out loud.

Then, let's cut to the chase.

"Nah."

Eh.

"Let me ask you something, Kuro… is it fine to be selfish sometimes?"

Huuuhhhh…

I swear I've heard Rin say to me, "Sometimes you can be a selfish potato," whenever I feel overly reserved. And that's why I always keep those words in my fastest storage here in my server (mind).

"Um, Ringo-san… are you Kuro's mother or wife…?"

My. Future. Wife.

"You sound so confident just then. But you're pretty much saying that it's fine right?"

Yeah.

"You just had to say that one word, you idiot."

Baaaaaaka.

"…

Then… I don't know if this one is going to be fine but…

Can I enter this place we're currently at?"

He then pointed downwards on the place we are currently dwelling in inside my mind. Technically, this is a part of my memory and that is why I fabricated this place to be the exact same thing…

And he is talking about the Room of Reality.

With that, I blinked and changed the room to white from gray.

"I know that it would mean that I'll become a Companion once I enter the base. That much is something that I understand, and I also know how heavy such a thing I am saying right now."

…

How long do you plan on staying?

"Maybe about a month. You already know that I'm not aiming for the gravity but the time since it would feel like I will only spend an hour or something in real time. What I want for a bit of time is solitude… a time to think alone."

You're a little pressed in time now, huh. My work schedule dictates that I have the weekend away from work. How about you?

"Do you go out on Sundays…?"

I'll consider this a special occasion, so occasionally. Exiles are self-sufficient but the door will only open once. Scratch that, I'll join you on the midpoint room to drop off your supplies.

But I have to ask this in advance.

Are you absolutely ready? If your mental state is way below average, anything can turn black immediately, and then I changed the room to the appearance of despair, or distortion.

"I understand."

Then the white box shall warmly welcome you, although you will get to escape summer, you cheeky guy.

"Then I'll do some packing once I get home tomorrow."

Apples, you're too excited.

▪ ▪ ▪

"I know that you've already seen our base through me, but in reality, nothing beats the real thing."

"Yeah. But I'm still nervous."

It may look pretty much like normal to me to step inside this abandoned greenhouse and go down a lift to see a small "society" below the society, but in hindsight, I was the same as G. We have an idea of who the Exiles are, but seeing them for the first time is truly nerve-racking.

However, I also know that our people will forever be on their guard whenever a human steps in to the place where they are not supposed to go. It sounds unfair while we can freely step outside, but in a sense, humans are hunters that invade our habitat.

Obviously in awe, G entered the underground base behind me with the caution that they will be suspicious of him, which is true. With the gathering of men, I took the opportunity to introduce him.

"He's Ginji Satoshi. As you can see, he's from the outside but-"

"Don't worry about that man," in one of the men's shoulder, Tenth's hand tapped.

"Oh… this makes it easy to explain since you're here, Tenth."

"He's my student and he also knows our existence. Just like Gin, he's one of the few humans we trust. But a part of it is because he is technically Gin."

"W-What… don't tell me that clones are now a thing outside…"

Well, it backfired.

"N-No, it's not like that…! It's something that we don't even understand well, but he shares his existence as mine. He is Gin Sakato, or me, but at the same time he isn't.

…

Anyway… He'll be borrowing the Room for a month."

"O-Oh. I see. Then please let him through. If this concerns the Void, you all know that Gin knows the most of it."

~ ~ ~

"So, first impressions, G?"

"Hahh… I can't be surprised that they were scared of me. I can't blame them."

"You'll be here for a few hours, but don't worry. They won't bite you."

"They're the ones that think that I will bite them…"

"I guess that's true. Anyway, I've set it to be one and a half month while it's four hours here. That'll give me time to binge watch J*Jo since I just started.

We've also got the duration's worth of supplies covered for you, so make yourself at home once you go inside. I'm confiscating your phone too."

"Hooo… I'm scared…"

"Even I don't know what's going to happen when you enter, so I'll wish you the best."

"Uh-huh…"

"You do the honors."

In that queue, G opened the door towards the midpoint room in silence and in nervousness.

"I can't help but think that this place is like a portal…"

"Chill down, lad. We're not yet on the main event."

"Alright. Here goes nothing…"

(!)

My senses tingled. The sound of the door opening clearly resonated not just on my ear but also in my mind. Indeed, it was the same feeling that I felt when Ken entered the room.

But I rejoiced. Even if by a very small glimpse, I saw the white room behind G's silhouette.

"The door will open again in a few hours so make sure that you'll get everything you need."

"Okay. I'll see you later then."

‹Ginji›

And just like that, the closing of the door loudly echoed on my ears. And by instinct, I immediately clenched every single fiber of my body upon dropping my bags.

Just as I thought, everything became heavy all of a sudden.

"…

Just one month, huh…"

But it wasn't something that I can't endure.

Nothing beats the real thing; he was right. Unlike the Void that I see from Gin's consciousness, this now felt very real. I am in the real place—where time and gravity accelerates. But at the back of my mind, I am very much aware of the real essence of this room.

"Haaaaahh…

It's nice to meet you."

~ ~ ~

Two hours later outside the Void.

"Aww, yes. 20°C banzai," Gin whispered to himself.

«With half the duration of Ginji Satoshi's stay inside the room, Gin entered the room as he has the ability to freely do so. Fortunately, he found Ginji to be sleeping on a still white room.

A thought popped up to his mind and then he took the clock that was lying around the the large space that said 10:18 in the evening.»

"Oho…"

«And later did he realize that the gravity is amplified by eight times.»

Ten hours later in the Room's time.

Rise and shine. Well, only rise since I don't really see the sun. In any case, it has been a while since I last had a deep and uninterrupted sleep.

But when I was about to get up on my feet, my mood immediately got a bit meh.

I woke up with a vandalism saying "MEEP." on an entire side of the wall.

"That idiot…"

~ ~ ~

Hey, I'm not going to bore you inside this room. I'm not some guy who keeps journal for this past month that I have spent here. So in other words, time is up for me, and I have managed to prevent myself from mind distortion.

And what do you know, the door has finally opened.

…

"Woah… It really is obvious to see that your hair grew a lot."

"It's been a while, Gin."

"I was almost sure that you're going to dropkick me right after stepping out."

"I was considering that, but it disappeared hours after. You could have told me that you can enter whenever you want…"

"Then that defeats the purpose.

Anyway, feeling hungry?"

"I've already ate. And besides, I'm in a hurry so I'll have to go now. Sorry about this."

"…

I take it that you have sorted things out?"

"Yeah.

Well then, I'll be off to a barber shop."

"Alright, see you soon."

…

"Hello, Yui? Are you in your place today? That's good. Can I visit later then?"

~ ~ ~

I have finally come to a decision.

After coming home with a trimmed head feeling the breeze once again, I immediately told my parents about the conclusion I have come to and finally explained my circumstances.

Not even a day ago, I was still very phobic of the things that I see in our house. It may have been only a few hours of me gone, but I haven't seen our home for more than a month, and it definitely felt so long.

But even before waiting for the sun to set, I headed out towards the direction of Yui's house. Time has flown for me in this span of a day that it felt like there shall be no more time to be wasted.

In just a few knocks on their door, it immediately opened with the apparent rushing of Yui seen in front of me.

It felt so unfair… it hasn't been so long for her, but I haven't seen her for a month.

"G-Good afternoon, Yui. Can I talk to your dad?"

…

Obviously, Yui and her father felt very confused as to why I refused to take a seat comfortably on their living room and opted to sit on the form of seiza on the floor.

Without beating around the bush…

"I came here to apologize, Uncle," I then kowtowed in the middle of my voice.

I have not forgotten that I promised that I will prostrate in front of them.

"After this school year ends, I will be leaving CSU, which means that I won't be able to accompany Yui anymore. But that doesn't mean that I am giving up on her. I can still wholeheartedly say that I still love your daughter and I will continue to court her.

I am also sorry that it took me this long to tell you, but I assure you that I have thought of this deeply and considered many possibilities."

To my surprise, Yui's father suddenly stood up to approach me which made me raise my head.

But at that moment, I felt something strange. I have been aware of the nervousness in my entirety, and that my heart has been beating strongly, but somehow, I am able to hear fast heartbeats that aren't mine as my ears rang.

Then I felt a gentle touch on my head. Uncle knelt on his knee and looked at my eyes.

"Everyone in this world has their own circumstances. I would assume that there is a hard road ahead of you, but I'm not disappointed. I understand your sentiments, and I also commend you for your courage.

Please continue to support my daughter.

And with that said…"

"A-And with that said…? What is it…?!"

"I'd like to invite you for dinner with us tonight."

"…

Uhh?"

…

"My word, your dad scared me good…"

"I'm sorry about that… I also didn't expect it."

"But thanks for that dinner. It's been a while since I ate someone's cooking apart from mine."

"Huh?"

"N-Nevermind."

With our idle chats dwindling down to a complete silence outside their house, I have heard someone's heartbeat once again, loudly at that.

"Umm, Y-Yui…?"

"Ginji… is there something you want to ask me…?"

It has already been rather dark, but the lights from their yard has greatly compensated for me to see the redness of her face.

"Wh-…

…

Y-Yui… will you go out with me…?"

In her silence, she grabbed my wrist and pulled me back inside their house.

"Mom, Dad… there's something I would like to tell you…”