Pyro POV

Let me tell you this... It's awesome! I managed to sow the seeds of hatred between the royal family and their relatives! It's so cool... Oh and actually I misunderstood the relations. That Duke is actually Brother-in-Law of the current king, and luckily for me that family had quite annoying traditions of patriarchy... and women were looked down upon... I guess it was because of some small dude with even smaller little dude, but I digress...

JJ: “Hello Kuro.”

Pyro: “Hello JJ... wait what was your name again?”

JJ: “Better call me JJ... I like this nick.”

Pyro: “... right... so... what do you want?”

JJ: “I heard about the conspiracy against the crown... is it true?”

Pyro: “Dunno, but the queen was poisoned by her brother, so... probably it's true.”

JJ: “... Wait... did they poison Gloria? Where is she? What happened?”

Pyro: “No it was her mother... Why do I tell you this anyway? I still need to uncover the plot against summoned... Oh right... Want to be the one to uncover it? I'm bored and could use a help.” I really don't want to go on this case... I mean I would gladly just massacre everyone for the speck of it, but learning about my enemies? That usually done Central... I miss that group... my best buddies... sort of... maybe I need to train someone in intelligence gathering? Or buy some slave with such skills... “Hey do you know of race with high comprehensive capabilities? I need some sort of helper...”

JJ: “... Maybe elves? Sorry you're better ask Ken or professor Ozelot for it.”

Pyro: “Actually it's Director Ozelot... and that is sound idea... Somehow I forgot to ask about it... anyway want to search for Rat and the noble that conspire against us, which means he conspires against crown too?”

JJ: “Yes! I would like to bring him to Justice!”

Pyro: “Okay. I will give you Bones as a helper... he should know that dude in face.”

JJ: “Bones? Wait... you mean that he knows that Rat fellow? Who is this Bones?”

Pyro: “Oh, he's my minion. And careful around Mr Peanuts. It's his pet. Really scary little thing.”

JJ: “Don't worry! I love animals!” I wish to know if you would like the skeleton animals...

…

So... when JJ learned about Bones nature... he slightly freaked out... but then he lost consciousness after witnessing Mr Peanuts... Yeah... I said that this rat is scary... I mean spikes, covered in blood and sickly green glow... Looks like some plague rat of old fictions... just... skeletal.

Anyway, after giving the orders I decided to visit Ozelot and ask him about the races... and get another slave... I mean I need someone with abilities of Central, so it's either some cool demon, or some really smart fellow... but considering that all demons in this world are bloodthirsty morons, it leaves me with only one option.

…

Narrator POV

Meanwhile the Rat was waiting for news from the Blood Throats. Due to the agreement she was supposed to meet them after the news of adventurers being missing. That should have happened in a few days, but they were already dead, not that the Rat knew about it.

Rat was a thief. Quite good one at that. And as all professionals she grew greedy, and decided to work with the nobles. Unfortunately for her, it cost her brother's life. Now she was working on the nobles, again, but not of her own volition. She was a slave. Contracted slave. One of the few mistakes she made in her life was trusting the noble to keep end of the bargain.

Rat: “*Sigh*... wish I was smarter than that...” as usual she was keeping low profile, but this time... it was not so easy. “What was that?” she asked at some strange noise. Usually the slums are the most safe place for the likes of her, but after the fire... The slums became very dangerous, not like they were safe before. Besides... she currently was hunted.

JJ: “You sure it was Rat?”

Bones: “Yes... it... was...”

Rat was hunted by the person she was supposed to meet after the job. But she didn't know it.

Rat: “Who are you?”

Bones: “Piper...” that was the name of her contact.

Rat: “And that clown?”

Bones: “Does... not... matter...”

Rat: “No it matters! You were supposed to meet me three later! What the hell happened.”

Bones: “Master... orders...”

Rat: “You and your fucking master! You-” and she was knocked unconscious.

JJ: “Was it necessary?”

Bones: “Yes... Need... Alive...”

Mr Peanuts: *Squeak*

Bones: “Exactly...”

This tale has been unlawfully obtained from Royal Road. If you discover it on Amazon, kindly report it.

JJ: “Uh... What?”

And so the clueless hero was left dumbfounded between the rodent squeaking and skeleton grunts.

…

Pyro POV

So... I am currently talking with that receptionist dude and Gendalf... eh... Ozelot?

Pyro: “So... why does that receptionist guy is here? I mean no disrespect, but you are-”

Zusky: “Hello Kuro. I am actually guildmaster of the adventurer guild.”

Ozelot: “And my younger brother.”

Pyro: “...OK... So anyway I have a question! I need a slave with good memory and stealth abilities... what race is the best for it?”

Zusky & Ozelot: “...” eh?

Pyro: “What? Something wrong?”

Ozelot: “It depends on individual, not race...”

Pyro: “Here you are wrong. You see some races have some specific aptitudes, be it magic, strength or intelligence. So there should be some race with good memory and stealth. Oh and telepathy. I mean I need an informant, so of course-”

Zusky: “Unfortunately creatures with telepathy are only some undead. So-”

Pyro: “Undead? What types?”

Zusky: “Wraiths, Shades, Ghosts, some vampires, maybe more.”

Pyro: “So... I need some spirit type undead... oh what about elementals then?”

Ozelot: “It's a bit easier. There are Animal type elementals and Pure elementals. Animal type are usually animals with strong elemental affinity, while pure elementals are made from one of the elements.”

Pyro: “Who's Stronger?”

Ozelot: “Pure ones, but it's rare for them to materialize in the material plane.” oh... we have different planes now, are we?”

Pyro: “So... I better summon some spirits, pure elementals and... maybe get to know some vampires?” Vampires... I think they will suffice... I mean they are usually quite stealthy... and have a good memory, no?

Ozelot: “How do you want to-”

Bones: “Master... we... found... rat...”

Pyro: “Good... bring her to the castle... JJ too.”

Bones: “Acknowledged.”

Pyro: “Gramps I'm going. Captured enemy of the state... and I guess you two are welcome to join... I mean I would like the help with it... like telling me about who the hell is who.”

Ozelot: “... That enemy you talk about... is it-”

Pyro: “Oh one of the bandit contacts... do you wish to go or not?”

Ozelot: “I will go. Brother, you should come too.” OK...

Pyro: “Off we go! To the torture chamber! … Um... do we have torture chamber in the castle?”

Zusky: “There should be...” Hope you're right.

…

Rat POV

Uh... my head... that contact...

Rat: “FUCK!” oh... I am not gagged?

???: “Exactly... so... Care to tell me who you are working for?”

Rat: “Care to look carefully?” Slaves can't disobey orders. I am not dead, so probably master doesn't know about it...

???: “Where? I don't see anything.”

Rat: “Slave mark. On the neck. See?” I mean he should be blind if he didn't see it.

???: “Nice tattoo... oh wait... you mean it's that contract on skin? Hah... I wish those morons told me about it more...”

Rat: “I can't disobey my master's orders.” I wish I could... and I can't even disrespect him! UH!!!

???: “Oh... yeah... quite the nuisance, is it not?” Yeah... nuisance...

Rat: “As I am not useful to you, then you better just kill me before the mark does.”

???: “And why? Honestly... I wanted to torture you a bit.” Oh shit...

Rat: “... Fine... Do what you want.”

???: “Realist... good... will do a fine material... say if you got another chance in life, what race would you choose?” Stupid question.

Rat: “Stupid question. Like I will get a new life.”

???: “You never know, you never know... so... what race? Will you want to remain human, or become elf? Maybe become a dwarf or beast-kin? Or some water dweller? Demon? Monster? Undead?”

Rat: “Demon! They fucking kill humans! So of course I would-”

???: “But so do undead.”

Rat: “They are stupid. No ego. No purpose. Nothing.”

???: “But you met the Bones... he's not some stupid undead... can't talk about his pet though.” Bones?

Rat: “Who the fuck is it? That bastard-”

???: “He captured you... along with the Justice Jerk and Mr Peanuts.” … Justice Jerk? Peanuts?

Rat: “... Stupid names.”

???: “Well... actually JJ is a nick for that moron, while Mr Peanuts... I just think it's funny.”

Rat: “So... can you-”

???: “Release you? No. Not until you answer my question and say the reason.”

Rat: “Demons, because they are strong, ruthless and enemy of humans.”

???: “What's wrong with this world? I mean 'Demons are Evil! They kill us! Kill them!' you idiots don't care about the undead! I mean Undead are cool! They are tireless, have no need for some stupid sleep, no hunger or thirst and they are basically immortal! And you want to be some stupid demon?” Okay...

Rat: “Necromancer?” if it's true, then-

???: “Nope. I am a HERO! Fear the power of my holy blade!” … So... I am captured by heroes...

Rat: “But necromancy? You said that Bones captured me and he's undead, right?”

???: “Yes... and his pet... Oh right... introductions are in order... call me Kuro. I fucking hate those question marks before my dialogue...” What dialogue? What question marks?

Rat: “Kuro... I am sorry, but I can't sellout my master.”

Kuro: “Don't worry. You will be able after some more questions.” Really?

Rat: “Very funny.”

Kuro: “Okay... now... if you were reborn as undead, what race would you choose?”

Rat: “I said I want to be reborn as demon, not some mindless corpse.”

Kuro: “Okay... so you like vampires.”

Rat: “Are you listening to me?”

Kuro: “Yes, I hear you, but I don't care about what you say... well except the times when you say something I want to hear.”

Rat: “Fine I want to be a lich.”

Kuro: “Okay... so... you want to be a vampire. What type?”

Rat: “The one with wings!”

Kuro: “... Hm... fine... they can develop them... probably... next is... what powers do you want?”

Rat: “Invisibility!”

Kuro: “You too? Oh... how good that we agree on this one!” uh... what? “You will be my assassin!”

Rat: “I am a thief!”

Kuro: “Not a big difference... I will teach you how to kill.”

Rat: “So... any more questions?”

Kuro: “No... now... umm... how do I dispel this contract, slave mark, whatever?”

???: “It's a long ritual, but you should-”

Kuro: “Okay gramps... how long will it be?”

???: “We have all the needed ingredients, and so it will be done in a few hours.”

Kuro: “Good... Oh yeah... Rat... So... When I get some info on turning human into vampire, you will change your race, but for now... you will remain human... sorry for the inconvenience... 'kay?” … crazy... “Oh yes... that's right... I am your new... eh... teammate? Just don't try to mate me, okay?” Jerk. “ Oh and I am quite annoying, so you will have to bear with me.”

Rat: “Are you reading my mind?”

Kuro: “Why would I need it? You have everything written on your face.” … jerk.