“How many?” Gersius asked as Thayle arrived with the final count of those lost from her army.
“One hundred and seven,” she said in a pained tone. “His men fought desperately and took many by surprise.”
Gersius took her into his arms as she struggled not to cry. She had already been told about Duncan's words and the price that would be paid if he didn't resist. To save the women of Ulustrah from this city, he was forced to kill those from elsewhere. It was a crime, no matter how you tried to rationalize it. Gersius knew it was probably the taking of his daughter that pushed Duncan over the edge and to this terrible end. He never realized what a vulnerability family was in such a conflict and how easily one could be made to bend the knee. Duncan must have hated himself in the end; enough that shame made him desire to die. It was another form of cruelty, used to turn a good man into a tool for madness. This sin could only be placed at the Father Abbot's feet, and Gersius sorely desired to make him pay.
Sarah was filled with rage over Duncan's final words. For her, it was intolerable that the head of the order of Astikar committed such crimes. She wanted to fly directly to Calathen to land on the temple and tear the man in two. It was only the knowledge that there were likely more dragons waiting that held her in check. Instead, she insisted on searching the land around them for the camps that held the missing women. She and Numidel were out now, scouring the landscape for any sign of them. He didn't believe they would be found, but to be sure, he had Jessivel and his men questioning the local populace to see if anyone knew where they were.
“How much more horrible is this war going to get?” Thayle asked as she clutched to his chest.
“I do not know,” he replied with closed eyes. “I never dreamed I would have to destroy the empire to save it.” His mind began to wander to another thought, and Thayle pulled out of grasp to shake her head.
“We can’t run,” she said. “I know Lilly’s valley seems like a dream, but if we run now, we will lose everything.”
“I was only imagining it. I had no intention of acting on it,” he assured as she turned to look out a window from an upper floor of the keep.
“How many of the empire's kings and lords are being blackmailed into suicidal confrontations with us? How many innocent lives do we have to take to get to the guilty?”
Gersius didn’t have an answer, and the very question chilled his blood. Innocents were being used to slow his advance, sent to die to protect the guilty. The men of Astikar in his army felt this pain acutely. They were distraught that brothers were standing against them to save others. While Gersius’s army marched to save the order and the empire, these brothers marched to save innocent women and children. It was a heroic act, used for evil, a term that was becoming more common of late, especially from the mouth of High Priest Lengwin.
He was meeting in the lower hall of the keep where his bishops and holy priests debated how to deal with this latest blight on the order's reputation. Gersius was proud that Lengwin did not try to hide or diminish the crimes, instead boldly acknowledging them and promising action.
“I am grateful he is so open about them too,” Thayle said, reading his mind. “Many of the women of my order appreciate his efforts, especially since discovering prime Yarvine was just as guilty as the Father Abbot.” She remained at the window, looking out over a city that still smoldered in places.
The battle was twelve hours old, and they occupied Lord Duncan's keep for the night, trying desperately to find survivors. They rescued many of their fallen but also many of the enemy. Hundreds of the cities guard were recovered, healed, and herded into the market square. It was a small portion of what originally guarded the city, but he was grateful they survived none the less.
One of the bright marks was the number of dove shields that were still alive. Many had been tangled so thickly by vines outside the wall they had failed to retreat inside. After Sarah set the vines on fire, they screamed in surrender to avoid a slow death by burning. They were rescued and subdued before the flames reached them. Now, over eight hundred of their number were being asked if they wished to fight and avenge this injustice.
“How many do you think will accept?” Thayle asked as she listened to his thoughts again.
“Lilly is talking to them now,” he replied.
“Why did you send Lilly to speak to them?” Thayle asked, turning from the window to face him.
He met those eyes full of regret and sorrow and once again thought of fleeing to the valley. Thayle shook her head at him, so he resigned himself to answering her question.
“I believe Lilly's sincerity will do more to reach them than you or I could. I hope she will convince them we did not want this confrontation but could not afford to bypass them.”
“Do you think they will believe Astikar warned you that leaving them would be a disaster for us?” Thayle asked as she looked into his eyes.
Gersius nodded. These women were the result of a man who believed in them and Astikar. They were well aware of what was at stake to force their cooperation and perhaps would value an opportunity to do something about it.
“Maybe,” Thayle agreed. “I suppose Lilly’s kind and loving nature might convince them we are full of remorse for what we had to do.”
“Let us not forget, we had no idea he was being forced into this fight,” Gersius reminded. “We had no way of knowing this was against his will.”
“That’s hard to believe for somebody who has seen their city burned and king slain,” Thayle sighed.
Gersius put his hands to her shoulders to steady her and show his support. “We will weather this storm and bring justice to the land, I promise you.”
Thayle nodded and turned away, looking back to the window. “I need to speak to my captains. We will test the dove shields and any of the city guard who wish to join. Do you still want to free any who are too bitter to march under your banner?”
“There can be no more bloodshed over the lies in this city,” Gersius replied. “I fault no man for refusing to fight for me. So long as they will go in peace, let them go.”
“I will let you know how many accept,” she said before leaving the room.
He took her place at the window, looking out from the upper floor over the wounded city. It saddened him that they would have to tax this city, as the people most certainly needed the wealth, but he would limit it to Duncan’s personal holdings if he could. Thinking of Duncan made his heart heavy, and he decided to leave the keep and head across the yard.
Soldiers on duty saluted and hailed the Lord Dragon Knight as he passed, but he only nodded in acknowledgment. On the far side of the inner yard was a tall, narrow building, with stained glass windows adorned with red stars. Such was the faith of Duncan and his family line that his grandfather constructed a private temple for the family. Gersius knelt in this temple as a child, praying to the god that would one day be his heart. He made his way to the thick oaken doors, pushing them open and walking into the marble hall.
It wasn't very large, a single long hall with six short pews on each side of a red runner. The floors were a polished dark stone streaked with red. It was an expensive luxury and came from far to the south. The walls were a lighter stone, polished smooth but nearly hidden behind banners of red with golden outlines depicting the star. The old banner of Duncan's family line hung to the right of the alter. To the left was one he had never recognized before, but now he stopped to stare. It was a red hawk over a white circle inside an elongated star trimmed in gold. It could only be a banner from the hawks, and he made a note to bring Sarah here later.
As he walked down the red runner, he remembered all the times he had been here. All the hopes and dreams he had during his youth. He also remembered her, the woman who first made him think of having a family of his own and promised to give it to him.
With a sigh, he reached the altar of red stone and knelt before the bronze star. He thought of the promises he made to Astikar and how easily they were broken when Lilly began to pay the price for his efforts. Again he was reminded how easily family could be used as a weapon of cruelty and wondered what he would do if the Father Abbot could lay his hands on Lilly or Thayle. What crimes would he commit to save them?
He cleared such thoughts away and opened his voice in a chant, praying to Astikar to forgive him for this slaughter. He didn't feel he owed the god anything, but he understood the reasons now and was grateful for Lilly, Thayle, and Sarah. As his song finished, he remained kneeling; his head bowed to the altar as he remembered what he once believed.
“Gersius,” a voice whispered from a side hall, intruding on his thoughts. ,
He turned his head, peering into the darkness for just a moment before switching to the dragon sight. His eyes began to burn with blue light as the man in dark armor walked into the open with his arms raised.
“I am not armed,” the man said as he stepped into the light, the raven emblem on his chest glistening.
Gersius rose slowly as his hands curled into fists. He turned with a careful and measured grace, taking a stance that would allow him to draw his sword in a heartbeat.
“Gersius, I mean you no threat. I need to speak with you,” he replied, taking note of the danger that burned before him.
“Stand where you are,” Gersius commanded, his powerful frame tense with anger as he came face to face with a man known as Thangris, a captain of the raven guard and the companies lore keeper. “Why are you still here?” Gersius demanded as Thangris stepped into the hall. He wondered how the man had remained hidden when these buildings were searched and would have them all searched again for hidden chambers.
“Because you are a brother, and I believe you can be reasoned with,” Thangris replied.
“You are no brother of mine,” Gersius replied. “And since when do the raven's reason with their victims?”
“You misjudge my purpose here. I could have fled the city before you broke its gate, but I saw a chance to do something my superiors would not. I knew you would come here eventually, so I hid and waited.”
“You didn’t answer my question,” Gersius said with a pointed finger. “Why are you still here?”
“I am here to save you,” Thangris said with a hint of conviction in his voice. “You are fighting for the wrong side, Gersius, and you will shatter the strength of the order in your campaign of wasted blood.”
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“My campaign of wasted blood?” Gersius mocked, the contempt in his voice apparent. “I did not slaughter women as a means of control over a good man. I did not turn his people against another just to bleed them both. I only wanted to save the empire!”
Thangris stood tall, his slightly graying hair falling about shoulders as he frowned at the reply.
“And how did you propose to save it? By recovering your dragon and fulfilling the prophecy that marked the return of Balisha, the false divine that sundered the world?”
“Solesta is the one who brought on that war,” Gersius replied. “And be careful when you blaspheme my goddess,” he growled, his anger growing with every passing moment.
“Your goddess?” the man said with shock apparent on his face. “You have fallen away from Astikar?”
“So have you,” Gersius asserted, gaining more control. “You could not be servants of Astikar and commit the crimes you do.”
The man went silent a moment and then nodded. “I no longer serve Astikar. My brothers and I serve another, one who seeks to right the destruction of the past and restore the balance to men and Dragons.”
“By taking the human form away from the dragons,” Gersius added, thinking of what Sarah learned from the dream.
“You know then?” Thangris said as his eyes narrowed. “And yet you seek to prevent his righteous efforts?”
“You call this campaign of brutality and madness righteous?” Gersius shouted. “You spread lies and then butcher the order of Ulustrah because she can see through them.”
“We did not want this war with Ulustrah!” Thangris shouted back. “And it isn't her truth we fight against; it is her support of you. We worked hard to ensure we had primes that would vote against joining you.”
“Prime Arlin didn’t wait for a vote. He saw the truth in my light and the lies in the Fathers.”
“Those lies were to protect the people,” Thangris replied. “Balisha is the true enemy, and Astikar has been working for generations to help restore her. We had no choice but to infiltrate his order and weaken him.”
“And what of my sister and the people you let the Doan butcher?” Gersius demanded. “What of the ambush you laid for my men and me?”
Thangris sighed and stepped closer as Gersius tensed. He was near enough to see the man's aura now, and it burned with tense light.
“Do you not see? We knew you were the dragon knight, the Father Abbot predicted it years ago. We worked hard to keep you away and prevent you from following this destiny. When it was clear our efforts had failed, we sought a new way to stop you. Your sister was to be a means of controlling you,” Thangris said. “She was to be captured and used to keep you preoccupied with negotiations for her return. No harm would have come to her.”
“Like no harm came to the women of Ulustrah you took from here? How many of their heads did you drop on the city?”
“None of us wanted to do that. Duncan forced our hand,” Thangris said. “We tried to reason with him, make him see the truth, but he stubbornly held on to Astikar with all his heart.”
“And what is the truth?” Gersius demanded. “You said you were here to save to me? Are you saying the goddess I love, and worship is the one who failed the world and caused the destruction?”
“She overstepped her bounds and allowed men and dragons to mingle their blood. If you understood the role the race of men plays in the lives of dragons, you would understand what a crime she committed.”
“You have no right to accuse anyone of a crime,” Gersius corrected, pointed a finger a the man. “Your order has stooped to every form of savagery to win your so-called just cause.”
“Only because you force our hand as Lord Duncan did,” Thangris accused back. “Because we know what is at stake and how great the suffering will become if we fail. A little suffering now is nothing compared to what’s coming if we fail. All depends on stopping you, but instead of fighting, I believe you can be reasoned with. You just need to realize you have been wrong about your course.”
Gersius paused for just a moment as the man's aura flickered with the light of truth. He was taken aback but remembered that a man who believed a lie with all his heart would speak as if true. Now he had to make a judgment, and his heart immediately reminded him why he was here.
“After what the Father Abbot did to Lilly and I, you expect me to believe I am the one who is wrong?”
“The Father Abbot had no choice,” Thangris replied. “You don’t understand what is at stake and how dire the situation is. The divines have lied to us, but there is a power rising that can set us free. He needs only a little more time, and a new order of men and dragons will lead us back to a golden age. But the balance is tenuous, and if you had returned with that dragon, all would be lost.”
There was a grinding of metal as his hand somehow managed to clench tighter, the man's words fanning the fires of his rage. The aura sight revealed the words to be the truth yet again, but the pain of those long hours under the keep came back to haunt him. He heard that voice asking him for the thousandth time what the dragon's name was.
“I went after Lilly to save us,” Gersius growled. “And she was butchered by my own brothers in return. Your order maimed and tortured Lilly for hours, all in the name of your mercy.”
Thangris took a step back as the blue fire in Gersius’s eyes was replaced by red. “Gersius, you don’t understand, millions will die if you stay this course, and the divines will forever hold us in bondage. Balisha is a liar she –”
The movement was quick, and Thangris lurched to the side as a plated fist dislodged most of his teeth. Gersius didn't allow the body to fall, grabbing a shoulder and throwing him back against a wall. A hail of blows followed, his armored fists crushing the man’s face until the lifeless body slide to its knees, blood painting the wall behind it. Gersius realized in this moment that he knew what true hate was, for he hated the Father Abbot and the raven guard with an all-consuming passion. It wasn't enough what they did to him, but what they did to Lilly was unforgivable. He thought of Sarah's words the other day and how she wished to slaughter them all and wipe the slate clean. Now he agreed, there could be no rebirth of the order until the old one was dead. Those men of Astikar that hadn't come to join his ranks by now never would. They would stand with the raven guard when his rage came to consume them.
“Farewell, brother,” he said with no passion in his voice as he turned away. He stormed into the outer yard and ordered the nearest captain to have the temple searched until they found the hidden chambers inside. The man looked confused but assured him it would be done as Gersius moved on to find Gams and see how ready they were to march.
“You look like death,” Gams said when he finally found the man organizing units to bring the wagons into the city.
“How soon can we march?” Gersius asked without acknowledging the comment.
“By the divines, you are still licking your wounds from this battle, and you want to march out to another?” Gams pressed, his brows creased in worry. “You aren't letting Duncan's death drive you to recklessness?”
“I am not,” Gersius said as he began to pace the street. “But nothing will be gained by sitting idle and giving the Father Abbot time to prepare. I want to march as soon as I can. This morning of possible.”
“Son, people need time to recover. The soldiers in your army are just as upset about what happened here are you are. You can't drive them from one terrible moment to another.”
Gersius looked down the long lane as some of the captains and officers stood by listening to the conversation. He explained the need to put an end to this madness and how Calathen was all that mattered. Gams agreed but worried the soldiers would be in terrible shape by the time they got there if he pushed them too hard, Besides the dragons and scouts were out looking for the camps, and that required more time.
“Sarah and Numidel will be back before morning. We can leave a garrison here to follow up any leads the scouts dig up,” Gersius countered.
“You are changed,” Gams said with a shake of his head. “You are being consumed by this war.”
“I am being driven by a war I never intended to fight so that I can get to the war I did intend to fight. In the process, I am killing the very people I came here to protect, and I do not see any way out of it unless I get to Calathen.”
Gams dismissed the gathered men and stepped closer to Gersius, taking a moment to ensure he had his attention.
“What happened?” Gams asked as he noticed the blood on Gersius’s plated fists.
Gersius tried to keep his voice calm as he explained the encounter in the chapel and what Thangris said. He also shared that he was close enough to see the man’s aura and that Thangris believed he was speaking the truth.
“And what do you think?” Gams asked.
Gersius wasn't sure what to think about Thangris's aura, but he was sure about one thing. He wanted to save people, while the Father Abbot did not. He sacrificed them without a care and resorted to brutal and violent tactics to get more. It was also possible this force Thangris was speaking of was lying, promising them a future he had no intention of delivering. One thing that was clear he opposed Balisha and stood for the ideals of Solesta.
“I think Thangris was consumed by the same zealotry that his order is known for. He believes in the truth of his message, no matter how misguided.”
“And what do we do about this hidden hand pulling the strings?” Gams asked. “Removing the Father Abbot may not see an end to the struggle.”
“That is why I am going to press on and face the Doan. Our enemy is behind them, and I intend to kick down his door.”
“The same enemy that cast both your ancient dragons out of this dream, whatever that is, nearly dead and unconscious?” Gams asked, trying to put some perspective on the idea.
Gersius understood the point, but what else could he do? The enemy was moving against him through the Father Abbot and had been for years now. The war wasn't going to end if he stopped at Calathen or the border keeps. He needed to roll through the Doan and confront this foe directly. What really bothered him was, if this enemy was so powerful that Sarah was helpless before him, why had he allowed Gersius to continue for so long? Why not take matters into his own hands, and strike directly, cutting off the heads of the force rising against him. Thayle would take over if he died, but she could be eliminated too, and so could Lilly if she decided to go on. Sarah and Numidel would have to go as well, but what then? Would Gams continue the war for him? Would Lengwin inspire the men to press on without their symbols? What would the morale of the army be like if the Dragons Knights and their dragons were slain?
“I have no choice but to march ahead until the true enemy is dealt with,” Gersius replied.
“We don't know what this enemy wants or why the old empire seems to be his focus,” Gams interjected. “We don't even understand why he isn't attacking the border keeps. It's almost like he's waiting for you just beyond the border.”
Gersius had considered that a few days ago. Gam's and Jessivel's spies were reporting that the war was stagnant. The Doan were slowly massing, building up, but making no effort to attack the keeps or hill forts. Certainly, if they threw a large mass at one of the weak points, they would breakthrough. Once behind the other defenses, they could spill out into the empire and cut the remaining forts off. That would isolate the best of the empire's defenders, leaving the personal armies of province lords, city guards, and militia to hold the tide at bay. These would be overcome one by one in rapid sweeps until the Doan were marching through the streets of Calathen. The only action they seemed to be taking was to bring bandersooks into the empire in small clusters to harass and damage his progress.
“We will find out when I stand on the border and begin my march in,” Gersius replied, his thoughts becoming labored. “Do all you can to be ready by the morning, and leave a five hundred man garrison in the city, but use as few priests and possible.”
He walked away with a heavy heart and went to find Lilly, eager to see how her efforts had gone. What he found broke through the clouds of his anger and caused him to pause in awe.
There she stood, on the back of a wagon as over a thousand people sat in the courtyard listening to every word she said. Her eyes blazed with blue fire, and her voice echoed with the dragon as she told them the story of Balisha and the true purpose of the human form. She stressed that the goal was to teach dragons how to love, so they could know the joy she had come to have. She paused and turned, smiling at him as she felt his presence. She turned back and continued the story, sharing the dreams of Balisha, Gersius, and herself. She explained how all they wanted was peace so they could start a family and how they wished the same thing for all of them. It was an appeal that pulled at the heart, and given the barbaric way the Father Abbot had spoken to the people, it had a profound impact. Gersius could see people were crying, and some hid their faces as Lilly spoke about love, family, and a dream for a future where dragons and men shared both. When she was done, she stepped down, and people swarmed about her, asking her questions and praising her name. She was like a reflection of the goddess come to the world, and she dealt with the people gently, assuring them it was safe to come to her.
He watched in admiration as Lilly explained how the women of Ulustrah would test the truth of their hearts if they wanted to come. Many lined up, but a few wandered away, returning to a home in the city or just beyond the walls to think about what they heard. People reached out to touch her, but she didn't shrink away, instead, reaching back to press her fingers to theirs. She was an angel of light in a dark place, promising a future they all desperately wanted.
It took nearly an hour for Lilly to extricate herself from the masses and get to Gersius, who waited patiently nearby. She ran to his arms, her emotions racing wildly as she begged him to take her someplace she could be alone.
Back into the keep to the high sitting room, they went, finally giving Lilly a chance to think about what she had done and why.
“You were impressive,” Gersius said as he came up behind and wrapped her up. “You spoke to those people with great passion.”
“I did,” Lilly replied with a sniff. “Because I saw our plight in every one of them. These people don't want to fight for this lie, but like us, they are being driven to disaster. You humans really do value love and family; it means everything to you.”
“To most of us,” Gersius admitted. “For some, their family is a source of pain.”
“Those people need a new family then, one that can love and appreciate them,” Lilly said and turned in his arms to look into his eyes.
“I don't know why I said some of that; it just felt like the right thing to say. Sometimes I don't know what is me and what is you, or Thayle, or Sarah. I can't separate what I am from you anymore.”
“Shh,” he whispered and pulled her in tight to settle her head on his shoulder. “I struggle with it as well, but when we are calm, and at peace, we remember who we are. This war brings out powerful emotions in us, and that makes it hard for the rest to separate, but just as you said, one day it will be over, and a star of love will reign.”
See, I have no idea why I said that,” Lilly whispered.
“You spoke from the heart, and the heart often knows more than you are aware,” Gersius replied. “Now, take a deep breath and sit with me. We can meditate to Balisha if you want.”
She took her breath with a nod before moving so they could sit together and meditate. He took his place with legs crossed as she sat in the center, leaning into his chest. He wrapped his arms around her slender waist as she smiled to be so close. Slowly he began a song to Balisha that she picked up, singing with her silver voice as they praised the goddess and asked for her blessing.
He felt Lilly slipping into the mediation and saw her golden cord reaching to the distant light that was her goddess. His cord danced beside it, the two sometimes mingling as if one. He took a deep breath and called out to Balisha as they sought the embrace of their goddess. A sense of peace washed over them as the power of the goddess filled their hearts.
Gersius let his mind wash away with the song as the power flowed back and forth. This was the moment of connection, the only way left for man to know the divine. As they floated in the river that was Balisha's power, a darkness fell over them, and a vision took them away.
They saw the valley under a night's sky, and Gersius looked on in amazement as he gazed on himself holding the hand of a little girl. He was pointing to a star in the sky and telling the girl how beautiful her mother was. He came awake with a start as Lilly stirred in his lap.
“What was that supposed to mean?” he asked as Lilly turned to look into his eyes. For some reason, she felt panicked as she shook her head in confusion.
“Did Balisha just show us our first child?” he asked.
“I don’t know,” Lilly replied. “It must have been Thayle’s daughter.”
Gersius nodded as his heart filled with joy. “She must want us to know where our path leads. She is reminding us of the reward that awaits at the end.” He looked up as Lilly nodded in agreement, but why did she feel so conflicted. Her aura twisted in knots, and a flashing glow appeared over her head. He decided not to press her on the matter, his mind too lost in the excitement of seeing a child. His road might be bloody, but there was a reward at the end, the one he wanted more than anything else. Despite the dark mood of the day and all the pain of speaking to Thangris, Balisha wanted him to know his dreams were still ahead of him, and one-day, Thayle would hand him a child. With an elated heart, he hugged Lilly, hoping this vision wasn't very far away.