Thayle shook her head as Gersius struggled to look at her. She stood ten paces away from him at about the range an average person can begin to detect auras. From this range, her aura would be fainter, but only just so. Somehow he had the sight of a woman with years of training and focus. She estimated he could probably see auras out to twenty. The only way to help him now was to get his eyes adjusted to the brightness until he could learn to tune it out. To do this, he had to look at an aura until he could do it no more.
“This needs to go faster,” he said.
“You can’t make this any faster,” Thayle replied. “The only way to get better at it is to do it. You know how to focus your mind, you need to learn how to focus your eyes. Once you get the focus, you need to hold it as long as you can to train your eyes.”
“I will keep trying, but this is a terrible time for this to happen. I have to be able to lead and fight.”
“Maybe you will gain some of my insight of how to do it,” Thayle said.
“Will that shorten the time it takes to adjust?”
Thayle wasn't sure, but she guessed. “I hope so. If you do, you should gain some of my ability to focus and shorten the time it takes. You had it for a little bit last night. Maybe that’s part of my training showing through.”
Gersius nodded as he blinked a few times. “All I can do is keep trying then. Perhaps it is fortunate that this happened now and not on the fields outside Calathen.”
Lilly paced behind him, staying out of his sight. Her aura was significantly brighter than a human one. To Gersius's untrained eyes, it was staggeringly painful.
“I worry about this gift,” Lily said as she paced. “I know what it looks like from the dream, but I don’t know if I want it now.”
Thayle smiled at her and walked up to take her hands.
“Sweetheart, you saw how beautiful your aura was from my eyes. Do you really want to give up being able to see that for lack of training?”
Lilly looked down at Gersius and chewed on a lip. “I worry about not being able to look at anybody. We are marching to war, and we need to be able to fight.”
“My thoughts exactly,” Gersius said.
Thayle shook her head and squeezed Lilly’s hands. “Both of you will appreciate this when you have it mastered. No one will be able to lie to you again, and you will always be able to see the light of our love.”
Lilly smiled and looked up with big bashful eyes. “It was amazing to see through your dream. You make it all look so beautiful.”
“That’s because I have years of training. I don’t even have to think about controlling it anymore.”
“It’s a shame we can’t just look through your eyes,” Lilly sighed.
Thayle paused a moment and gawked at Lilly with a shocked expression.
“Why in the name of Ulustrah didn’t I think of that?”
“Think of what?” Lilly asked.
Thayle slapped her head with a hand as she laughed. “Having you two look through my eyes. You will be able to see the aura as I control them. I bet that will give you both a huge insight into how to see them.”
“It will?” Gersius asked.
“There is one quick way to find out,” she said. “Close your eyes,” she instructed. When Gersius was ready, she turned to Lilly. “Sweetheart, I need you to stand where I was.”
Lilly nodded and walked across the tent to stand where Thayle had been and waited.
Thayle sat on the ground before Gersius and looked to Lilly, who twisted nervously.
“Put your hands on me and use the bind to look into my thoughts. I will focus on seeing Lilly properly, and you should be able to see her clearly.”
Gersius nodded as his hands probed her for exposed skin. He leaned forward and pulled her into his lap, pressing her to his chest so he could reach around her to take her hands.
“I suppose this works,” Thayle laughed. “Do you have a firm enough grip?”
Gersius nodded in the back of her hair. “I am ready.”
Thayle smiled and looked to Lilly and adjusted her sight.
“Alright, Look into my thoughts and see your wife properly.” She smiled as he gasped, and his hands tightened over hers.
“Lilly’s aura is so bright,” he whispered.
“Lilly’s aura is like twenty human auras,” Thayle said.
“It dances with white light, and there are shades of purple and blue on the edges.”
“That means she is excited,” Thayle said. “Those color bands are her joy to know you’re seeing her aura.”
“I saw somebody with a bright red aura the other day,” Gersius said.
“That means they were angry,” Thayle said. “The brighter the red, the angrier they are. If it starts to pulse and flare up, they are likely about to attack.”
“That will be handy to know,” Gersius said.
Thayle nodded and spoke. “Just be careful not to wait for it. Not all people who attack are angry. Some people enjoy battle, and they will appear to be happy when they strike.”
Gersius nodded his understanding as he continued to watch.
“You want to see something special,” Thayle asked.
“I would love to see more of this,” he said.
Thayle smiled and locked eyes with Lilly.
“My Sweetheart, I love you,” Thayle said softly.
Gersius gasped and tightened his grip on Thayle's hands as Lilly's aura pulsed and danced with colors starting at her core and radiating out in rings. It reached out with golden arms that twisted and spiraled, traveling to Thayle.
“She fills the room with light,” Gersius whispered.
“Lilly is light,” Thayle said. “When she touched that sword, her aura died to less than that of a weak human. I was so afraid she was damaged, but she quickly recovered.”
“I wish I could see it,” Lilly pouted, causing Gersius to laugh.
“When she pouts, her aura dips heavily into blue.”
Thayle smiled. “A blue at the core usually means regret. When it dances in rays at the edges, it means love.”
“Why does where it appears matter?”
“A light at the center is something you're internalizing. When it's at the exterior, it is something you're radiating out. All negative emotions are internal, and all positive ones are external. When you're negative, you draw in pulling from around you, when you're positive you radiate out, feeding those around you. Your aura often fills with blue at the core when you have to kill. It's one of the ways I know you are a good man. You deeply regret the loss of life and take no pleasure in killing.”
“There is a whole language to this light.”
Thayle nodded as he understood. “And I will teach you both every word of it.”
She went to encourage him more when the tent flap opened, and Mingfe walked in.
“I am sorry to disturb you here, but there is a matter that must be addressed.”
Thayle looked up at her, and Gersius lost his connection. For a moment, he opened his eyes and caught a glimpse of Lily's aura unprotected. He groaned in pain and turned his head in a rapid jerk.
“Is he well?” Mingfe asked, pointing at him.
“He’s fine,” Thayle said. She turned to put a hand to his shoulder as he shook his head.
“I am fine,” he repeated. “I just need a minute to recover.”
“Just keep your eyes closed until the shock passes,” she encouraged.
“Are you sure he is well?” Mingfe asked again. “His aura is in pain.”
Thayle stood up and turned to face her.
“What is so important you had to disturb me here?”
Thayle watched as Mingfe glanced from him to her and back again. She met Thayle's eyes and nodded her acceptance that the topic was off-limits.
“The matter of your relationship is,” Mingfe said. “There are those in your army who question your right to lead when you deny Ulustrah’s commandments.”
Thayle stood silent a moment as the implication became clear. She knew this moment was coming and dreaded what it meant.
“They want to know why I have not gone silent,” she replied with a shake of her head.
Mingfe nodded. “I hold no discontent for you, but you have a large number of high priestesses in your ranks now. They are questioning why you have not stepped down. It is whispered among the lesser priestesses as well, but they do not dare challenge you.”
“I need Thayle to stand as a dragon knight, not as a housewife,” Gersius said as he held a hand over his eyes.
“What you need is irrelevant to Ulustrah’s commands,” Mingfe said. “Her refusal to step down is a wound to the hearts of those who have. And a slap in the face to the women who chose Ulustrah over family.”
Thayle folded her arms around herself as she twisted in grief. “What am I supposed to do here?”
“Perhaps it is time you addressed this for good,” Gersius said, keeping his eyes closed.
“But the damage that might do?” Thayle asked.
“Can not be helped now,” he replied. “If they do not believe you have the right to remain in command, then you have no army.”
Thayle looked back at him as Lilly stepped up and took his hand. She helped him stand and then looked to Thayle with concern in her eyes.
“Do you need one of us to come help you?” Lilly asked. “We can help explain it.”
“She must stand on her own,” Mingfe insisted. “If she is to lead this army, she must stand as its commander.”
“I agree,” Gersius said. “The women of Ulustrah are Thayle’s army, not mine. They are challenging her right to lead, she must answer them.”
Mingfe nodded her approval.
Thayle took a deep breath and turned to Mingfe. “Then let's go face my accusers. Gather them up so I can address them together.”
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Mingfe shook her head. “That will not be necessary. They have already gathered to discuss who should replace you. They are waiting to hear your explanation before they make a choice.”
Thayle stood like a statue and then nodded. “Good, I want this over with quickly.”
Mingfe stepped back to the tent flap and held it open.
Thayle walked through and then followed Mingfe across the camp as she led the way.
“So, what brought this out now?” Thayle asked.
Mingfe walked beside her and glanced with a concerned eye. “They were already talking about you but were afraid to act. When you added Naveen to a position of leadership, it pushed them to feel they could no longer wait. Not only is she married, but she is married to a priest of Astikar. Many of the women are upset at this arrangement and feel it proves you are not fit to leed.”
Thayle sighed as they walked and looked over the massive camp that was her army.
“Does the whole camp wonder why I am not silent?”
“Many of them don’t care,” Mingfe said. “Only the ones who have had to make the choice. Those who stepped down or denied themselves the love of family feel insulted.”
“Do you wonder why I haven’t stepped down?” Thayle asked.
Mingfe shook her head. “Your husband marches to war, and you march with him. You are not in a position to settle down and raise a family. Why waste your talents by stepping down when you have no home to take care of.”
Thayle glanced at her. The explanation made sense, but it wasn't why. She wondered how Mingfe was going to react when she heard the truth. With a silent resolve, she marched ahead to a pivotal moment of her life and her faith.
Mingfe took her to the biggest tent the women of Ulustrah used, and there inside were fifteen of the high priestesses. Stood before them was Naveen, who had her arms folded over her chest. All eyes turned to Thayle as Mingfe held the tent flap to let her in. Thayle walked to stand before them all and then glared in the face of accusers.
“So you wish to challenge my right to lead this army,” Thayle asked in a firm voice.
A tall woman with the creases of age on her face stepped forward. She was a kind and devout woman who sacrificed family for service and risen to the rank of Grand priestess herself. Next to Thayle, she was one of the most respected women in the camp, and her wisdom was unquestioned. She was known as Kaylinn, and she was not shy about sharing her opinion.”
“You will forgive us, Grand Priestess,” she said. “None of us questions that you are the highest of our rank and that you are chosen of Ulustrah, but her command is clear. You are married and your family must come first. You must go silent, and you and the other silent women must be sent away.”
Thayle nodded to the woman as she spoke.
“She has no family to watch over, or hearth to warm,” Mingfe argued. “Her husband married her on the march to war. He has not yet started a home for her to take care of.”
“Exactly what I told them,” Naveen said.
Kaylinn nodded her understanding but was undeterred. “Ulustrah's commands are direct and straightforward. Governess Commander Thayle has married, she must step down. How can she claim to be Ulustrah's champion while standing in violation of her laws?
“How can she be Ulustrah's champion if she steps down?” Mingfe argued. “Clearly, Ulustrah did not intend for her to stand aside.”
Kaylinn her hands out to gesture to all the women gathered around.
“Every woman here has paid the price of service. Are you going to spit in the face of our sacrifice? She has chosen the path of family. She must follow that path where it leads.”
“Ulustrah only says to put our family first,” Naveen argued. “She never said we had to stop serving the instant we take a husband.”
Thayle held up a hand to silence Naveen. She turned to Kaylinn and prepared for an argument. Thayle knew she was going to resist what she had to say.
“Kaylinn,” Thayle said, using her regular name. “It pains my heart to say this, but you're wrong. All of you are wrong.”
The women in the room glared at her with firm eyes as Thayle readied for the outcome.
“You accuse us of being wrong?” Kaylinn huffed. “You accuse a room full of women who have forgone family to serve Ulustrah with love of being wrong? Is there any woman here who can deny that what I said was true and accurate?”
“Ulustrah has chosen her to lead this army,” Mingfe said. “If that is the case, then she has special permission.”
Kaylinn shook her head. “When has special permission ever been granted? When has any woman been allowed to sit on such a throne with a husband at her side? This is the price of Ulustrah’s path, to reach it’s highest pinnacles, you must walk alone.”
Thayle watched as an argument erupted with Mingfe and Naveen on one side and all of the high priestesses on the other. She realized there was no way to say what needed to be said gently. All that was left to do was shatter the illusion and hope they survived the revelation.
“All of you will be silent!” she shouted with the dragon voice. She waited for the room to quiet and made sure she had everyone's attention.
“I know for a fact that you are wrong because I was told so by Ulustrah herself.”
Kaylinn looked to the other women and then back to Thayle. “The divines no longer speak to the people directly. How do you expect us to believe that?”
“We will establish the truth the way we always do, by the light,” Mingfe said.
Mingfe motioned to a spot in the center of the group for Thayle to stand so her aura would be apparent to them all.
Thayle walked to the spot and looked over the room. All of the women gathered here were like Kaylinn. Women who dedicated their lives to Ulustrah and were long passed their child years. They gave up the joy of family for their goddess, and she was about to tell them they had sacrificed for nothing. With a tremble in her voice, she started the tale.
“I traveled north into the wilds with Lilly and Gersius to a place known as a nexus. Here one is able to enter the domains of the divine.”
Mouths fell open as her aura registered the truth and women glanced at one another in shock.
“From here, I was able to enter Ulustrah's gardens and stand before Ulustrah herself. She told me that our order had forgotten much of her commands, and misinterpreted others.” A tear rolled down her cheek as women already began to react with scowling faces and auras dipping deep into red. With another deep breath, she continued.
“She told me she never wanted us to step down when we married, only that we put our family first. The practice of going silent is wrong, and she wants us to stop following it.”
The room was quiet as a cave as women’s aura's flared with colors of pain and anger. Thayle closed her eyes, unable to see the lights of emotional devastation sweeping the women in the room.
She heard the tent flap open as some of them stormed out. Finally, a woman spoke in a broken cry.
“I could have had a family?”
Thayle looked up into the eyes of a woman flaring in colors of deep pain. She was one of only three of her accusers that remained.
“Yes, you were never meant to choose between love.”
“My life has been wasted!” the woman yelled.
“I’m so sorry,” Thayle said. “I was afraid to share what I was told because I knew the pain it would cause.”
Mingfe put a hand to her shoulder and took a deep breath. “You were tasked with a painful load to carry. Many women in this camp have thrown much away over this belief. But you are not the one who led us down this path. You are the one who has come to save us from it.”
“But so many will be hurt,” Thayle said with a quaking voice.
Mingfe tightened her grip on Thayle's shoulder. “All change comes with pain. A new life cannot be brought into the world without pain. You have brought the order new life, but it's birth pains must now be felt.”
Thayle nodded and looked over the three devastated women and one very happy Naveen.
“How can I go on knowing what my faith has cost me?” one of the women asked.
“Your sacrifice might have been made in ignorance, but it was still a test of your love,” Thayle said. “Ulustrah will cherish you for what you have done because you did it in innocence and a pure heart.”
The woman looked away as if the answer wasn’t enough. She nodded to herself and walked out of the tent with the other two close behind.
Mingfe and Naveen waited silently for the tent flap to close.
“Why do I feel like I just destroyed those women?” Thayle asked.
“Because you told them the truth,” Mingfe said. “And your truth destroyed the lie they were living for.”
“They think the sacrifice they made was pointless,” Thayle said.
“None of it was pointless,” Mingfe argued. “You said so yourself, the goddess will still reward them because the choice was made to honor her.”
Thayle nodded but didn’t feel any better about it.
“You saw the goddess?” Naveen asked.
Thayle looked up to her and smiled. “She is beautiful, and her voice is like a wondrous song.”
Mingfe stepped up to Thayle and looked her firmly in the eyes. “Why did you not tell me sooner?”
Thayle looked away, unable to hold that firm gaze. “I was so in shock of what happened that day I forgot about it myself. I stood before the goddess as her green doe and looked into the deep pools of her black eyes. Then as my time with her ran out, she altered the binding link I had with Gersius so that it would include Lilly. She is the one who bound us all together. I was so overcome by joy that what she said was washed away. Only later when talking to Gersius and Lilly did I remember what Ulustrah said.”
Mingfe nodded. “You were overcome and unable to endure all that happened, but when you did remember, why didn’t you tell us then?”
“I knew the pain this would cause. I planned to change the order when the war was over, and Calathen was restored. I wanted to meet with the primes and make a sweeping change. They are the ones who have to alter hundreds of years of faith.”
“You didn’t want to be the one people would point to and blame,” Mingfe said with a nod.
Thayle nodded back as Mingfe cut right to the core. “I am chosen of Ulustrah, but in my heart, all I ever wanted to do was bless a harvest and unite two young lovers. I desire all the simple blessings any daughter of Ulustrah wants.”
Mingfe smiled with a laugh. “You are well past simple desires. You are the highest-ranking military commander in Ulustrah's order. You are her chosen champion, and you are an Empress of the dragon empire. I am afraid your days if blessing the cabbage field are over.”
Thayle let out a strained laugh and nodded her head.
“This will spread through the camp. We need to begin dealing with the anger that is likely to flare up.”
“This is going to burn like a fire,” Mingfe said. “You may very well have to pick through the ashes at the end.”
Thayle stood by silently as she thought about what to do next.
“I do not want the rest of them learning of this from one of the others,” she said. “Gather the whole of the camp in the fields. I want to address them myself. It's time we all walked in the truth and put this silly concept of going silent behind us.”
Mingfe nodded her approval. “I will see it done. I will come to get you once they are assembled.”
Thayle nodded, and Mingfe briskly walked from the tent. Outside, Thayle heard her shouting that the camp was to assemble to be addressed.
“Why do I feel guilty that I get to keep my love for both my husband and my goddess?” Naveen asked.
Thayle looked up at her with a gentle smile. “Because you know how many women out there have paid the price for a mistake. You know they will look at you and see what they could have had, and resent you for it. You have a kind heart, so you feel guilty for reminding them of their pain.”
“All the high priestesses have given up their family years,” Naveen said. “Half of them were crying when they left. I can’t imagine making such a supreme sacrifice and then finding out I never needed to make it.”
Thayle nodded in agreement and turned to look at the place where the women were gathered. “Every one of them is one of Ulustrah's greatest women. What they lost, they did so in ignorance, but they also did it out of love. They said that to praise Ulustrah was greater than a husband and family. I know she will reward these women greatly for the sacrifice they made. I wish I could make them appreciate that now.”
Naveen nodded but had nothing further to add. They waited in silence until Mingfe returned and opened the tent flap.
“It is time,” Mingfe said. “Make the wound swiftly so that it may begin to heal.”
Thayle nodded and followed Mingfe back to the field beside the camp. The forces of Ulustrah stood waiting in neat rows, packed tightly so what she said would be heard by all. Absent, of course, were nearly all the high priestesses who were likely busily crying someplace.
Thayle walked like she was going to her own execution. Many of these people were ordered to be here and were already unhappy. Many a woman present had previously scorned a love or two in order to pursue her faith. How many had cried alone someplace for the love they wished they could have? A love that came and was rejected for fear of going silent.
She walked to the front of the group and stood before them. Behind her, gray clouds massed as if to echo the impending storm that was about to be unleashed.
“I have something I have to tell you all,” she said. “I wish to make sure that none of you doubt my words. I ask for twelve volunteers to come forward and stand beside me. You will watch my aura and testify that I speak the truth.”
Mingfe quickly selected twelve from the fifty or so who volunteered and set them six to each side of Thayle.
“By the love of Ulustrah, I charge you, if anything I say is untrue, you are to call me a liar,” Thayle said firmly to them.
Around her heads nodded, and whispers began to spread through the gathered mass. Thayle saw auras begin to twist with concern and worry.
She let these few moments of calm slip by as she gathered her strength. Then, carefully and slowly, she began to explain. She told them the whole story of Gersius and Lilly and how she came to be in their love. She explained the passage over the mountains and the dragon temple. She told them all about the hunt for the shrine in the northern wilds and how she came to be marked. She paused at this point to let them whisper and point before continuing her story. At last, she came to the temple and revelation therein. People gasped at the notion of going before the goddess herself and having her speak to them directly.
Thayle took a deep breath as a tear rolled down her cheek. A firm hand came to her shoulder, and she turned to look into Mingfe's eyes.
“You are a commander now, just as your Gersius is. It is the burden of a commander to lead those who follow into pain and suffering. You only do what you have to do. Tell them and let them decided what is to come next.”
Thayle nodded and looked back to the gathered mass that stood, twisting in uncertainty. She finished her story and told them what Ulustrah said. She told them the truth and watched as her army fell apart.
Some women jumped for joy. Some fell to their knees, crying. Some looked absolutely lost and unable to come to terms with the revelation. Many of the silent women cried tears of happiness to know they no longer had to be silent. Many of the full priestesses cried tears of regret and loss.
Thayle dismissed them and watched them stagger away. She stood by silently until all that remained was Naveen and Mingfe. She turned around to see both women watching her with stunned expressions.
“You were willing to go silent just to give them the love of a child?” Mingfe asked.
Thayle looked away as her tears continued to run down her cheeks. She closed her eyes and nodded silently.
“No wonder you are Ulustrah’s champion,” Naveen said. “You gave them everything to seal their love, even yourself.”
Thayle smiled slightly. “I did love them both. It isn’t like I wasn’t gaining anything from it.”
“You were on the path to be like the others,” Mingfe said. “A heart fully devoted to the goddess and blind to the love of family. Yet, you gave up that path to make them happy. Didn't you worry you would be a lesser woman in their relationship?”
Thayle laughed. “After what Lilly did to me that night, I had no worries about being lesser. Lilly never saw me as a way to a child. She wanted me in her relationship because she loved me. Gersius wanted me in as well, but he was afraid I wouldn’t love him. He stood aside and let Lilly chase after me for quite a while.”
“He was probably telling her how to win you,” Mingfe laughed.
Thayle smiled and nodded. “He did worse than that. I have something I wish to tell you both, but I need you to keep it between you.”
Mingfe nodded, and Naveen vowed never to repeat what was said.
Thayle smiled and explained the binding and how they could communicate silently across it. She then explained how he was telling Lilly what to say as he sat right beside her.
“He did not!” Mingfe remarked.
“It was very uncomfortable,” Thayle said. “He as sitting right there as his wife practically told me she wanted to bed me. The whole time I was in shock that he said nothing, not realizing he was telling her exactly what to do.”
Mingfe roared with laughter. “He is a devilish man. He hunted you like a wild beast and used his wife as his weapon.”
“He seems like such a nice man,” Naveen said.
Thayle nodded. “He is a great man, and quite possibly the best husband I could ever ask for. He was just afraid I would reject him again. He figured out I have a soft spot for women, so he let Lilly win me over first. Even so, when the time came, he wanted to be sure I would love him and accept his love in return. He tested me at that ruined temple. He was determined to turn me down unless I proved I wanted his love.”
“What a story of love. To think of how easy and silly my love with my husband is by comparison,” Naveen sighed.
“Your love was meant to be easy, as is the love of many,” Mingfe said. “But Gersius walks a path of fire and blood. He cannot allow anyone into his love unless she can withstand the heat of that fire, and survive the blood. Thayle had to be tested to prove her mettle, and she came out of that fire stronger than any sword.”
Thayle smiled and let out a little laugh. “You make me sound like some hero.”
Mingfe looked at her with a heavy brow.
“You may be the greatest hero of Ulustrah in our history.”
Thayle was silent a moment and looked at Naveen for support.
“I agree with her,” Naveen said. “You made such a sacrifice when you believed you were going to have to pay the price. You survived all those challenges and stood by your convictions. You survived the path north and went before the goddess herself. Then you became her champion, her general, and now you have restored her truth. Who else can claim to have done anything even half as great?”
“I am just a priestess,” Thayle said.
“No,” Mingfe corrected. “You are Governess General Thayle, Champion of Ulustrah, Dragon Knight of Balisha, and Empress of the Dragon Empire. Before your road is done, your name will become a legend.”
Thayle's lower lip trembled as she looked into Mingfe's eyes. She tried to think of some way to deny what they said, but all she could think of was Gersius, and how he would respond.
“So be it.”