Chapter 35: Boiled Water and Frozen Chicken

By the time the sun rose again I had felt quite proud of my accomplishments throughout the night.

I had tried to give Jellybee the night off, since I felt like he had deserved it. Besides, the two other skeleton Minions were taking time to rest. Why not have him join?

He had been strangely resistant to the idea. So we chatted through the night as I quietly Mana Dusted and Gardencrafted.

During the early hours of the morning another creature wandered into The Merriweather Dungeon.

He pecked at the dirt absentmindedly.

Maybe creature wasn’t the right word.

Monster? Perhaps?

Regardless, it seemed harmless. I opted to not alert my Minions to the intrusion.

I figured Tiptap would eventually chase it off on her own eventually.

****

Another rooster cried as the sun rose through Bonny's bedroom window.

The sun had barely peeked over the mountains. Which meant it was an unreasonable time for anyone to be alive.

Bonny tried to sleep through it, but couldn't.

Without much thought, Bonny fitfully wrench herself out of bed and threw a shoe out the window towards the offender.

There was a surprised squawk.

Satisfied, Bonny turned to return to bed.

A moment passed. Then a snowball sized white projectile rocketed against the window in front of her.

She returned to the window. “Who threw that?” She called.

Her answer was immediately answered when she saw a bright blue light accumulating within the rooster’s beak. Half a second passed.

Then another projectile rocketed at her.

She ducked just in time as another shot by, barely missing her head.

She turned around to confirm the damage against her bedroom mirror. A crack had formed and it had tilted to the side. Water seeped down the vanity.

Yes, the rooster was indeed shooting genuine snowballs at her.

She closed the window pane right before another collided into it.

She was not going to have a death battle snowball fight before coffee.

Dread filled her heart. She knew that bird call had sounded familiar! And that crest was unmistakable in this light.

The infernal ice cock bastard was back! Why? Had he followed her up the hill?

He let out a triumphant screech, then trotted off out of sight behind the mushroom tree and towards the back of the house.

Filled with adrenaline from the wake up call, Bonny decided to get ready for the day, suddenly filled with a craving for fried chicken.

She supposed it was better for her to be getting now. The day could hold many other dangers in store for her. Might as well face them head on.

The young witch went over the various notes in her head as she pulled on stockings and laced up a black leather under-bust corset. Bonny had a whole list of things she wanted to do. Her brief home inspection pointed out several concerns and improvements she desired.

Like a new paint job, undamaged furnishings, wall decor and art, yard maintenance, personal work spaces… The list was already starting to go on and on...

Which would have normally been a monumental and exciting mountain for any first home buyer to climb. Yet she had the benefit of a helpful Dungeon Core that could literally grow renovations.

Her home was a Dungeon.

She wasn’t sure what to think about that. Last night in her exhaustion she was still tempted to ask the Core to vacate the premises with her Minions. It had almost surprised Bonny to wake up alive. Ethel Merriweather had kept her word and let Bonny sleep in peace.

You could be reading stolen content. Head to Royal Road for the genuine story.

But she also wasn’t really surprised about that. The Dungeon Core, somehow, truly did possess the soul of an elderly woman. One that seemed somehow even more lost and confused than Bonny was.

That would have to be rectified. According to that creepy messenger, Spinemess, Bonny and the whole town were in dire straits. If these were normal circumstances where Bonny had been properly established in her business matters she could have entertained the idea of running away from the conflict and starting over. But that was not the case.

Another foolhardy idea had lodged itself in Bonny’s mind instead. Using the Dungeon to help protect the town seemed impossible.

But first, she had to test Ethel’s loyalty. Bonny pulled out her scissors and put on her rainbow glasses. Despite trusting Ethel, Bonny still felt exposed.

Slowly, but surely, Bonny spent the next two hours snipping through the Dungeon’s Leyline connections to the master bedroom.

By the time she was done, nothing had happened.

She let out a deep breath she had been holding in and slid against the wall. Relief loosened her tense muscles. The whole time Bonny was poised to run. Or jump out the window if she needed to.

She waited for a spell, listening. She kept her glasses on and paid attention to the severed threads of Mana that tangled upon themselves chaotically without direction.

Ethel had not sent any Minions or had even tried to speak with Bonny during the entire process.

Dungeons tended to react very negatively towards their Leylines being cut. Usually with terrible violence. Especially if the area was part of their original ‘body.’ Which made sense, in a way. Cores used their environment to perceive and influence the world. Manually reducing the size of their Dungeon was the equivalent of gouging out someone’s eyes or slicing off a limb.

Unless Ethel decided to spread again, the master bedroom would be cut off from Ethel’s influence entirely.

Bonny crept down the stairs.

Ethel’s ghostly avatar sat in her rocking chair next to the Pyreplace, same as usual, Knitting with two ethereal needles. Tiptap lay curled around the Dungeon Core. The Neverwatch Pot Simmered and brewed over the Witchpyre. The living room had a slightly metallic smell to it, mixed with a hint of bergamot.

There were also other minor renovations that had occurred during the night while Bonny had slept. A full sized kitchen table sat next to the backdoor, complete with dining chairs situated around it. In another corner was what appeared to be a scratch post tree, where Tiptap’s copy was taking a nap. Glancing out the front window, Bonny could see that the log Brill threw at the house was gone, along with the other front porch debris.

The expression on the avatar’s face looked pained and exhausted, with sunken eyes. She looked up from her knitting at Bonny, then grinned brightly.

“About time you dragged your ass out of bed,” Ethel said. “I’ve been waiting all morning to unwrap these presents like a kid before Christmas! Hurry and eat some breakfast so you can help me choose.”

****

“What’s wrong?” I asked. “You look troubled, dear.”

Bonny was sitting at the new dining table with a cup of earl gray tea and a bowl of oats before her. (At least, I think it was earl gray. Or something similar to that. The leaves had that bergamot scent to them.)

She had frowned as I had read the ability descriptions back to her verbatim.

“It’s nothing,” she replied. She took a sip of tea. “Jellybee, this is… better. Keep it up.”

Jellybee saluted casually. “Granny taught me a lot about tea last night. Who knew boiling the water made it taste better?”

“I can see that,” Bonny responded. “I see you both got a lot done during the night,” she tapped on the table. “What else did you get up to?”

“Don’t change the subject,” I said. “What’s got your grits burnin’?”

“It’s nothing. Really.”

“Don’t give me that rubbish, Bonny. I can tell your cornbread ain’t done in the middle. Speak up.”

She sighed. “You’re so weird, Ethel. I’m fine. Just puzzled about this weird favoritism you’ve been receiving. I can’t tell if it’s the difference between Dungeons and other sapients, or something specific to you.”

“Elaborate,” I said.

“Well, System Clerks aren’t exactly known for adding in personal touches. In all of my life, every notification I’ve ever received has maintained a strictly professional tone. The System has always sounded like it's running a business. I haven’t heard of anyone getting such informal words. Let alone friendly advice.”

“Oh, that’s just Milly,” I said without thinking. “Fiddlesticks!” I had forgotten. I was so excited to share my options that I hadn’t realized I should have given her the cliff notes instead. “I, uh, wasn’t supposed to tell you that… Can you keep it a secret, please? I don’t want that other lady to drop a dime on Milly.”

“Who’s Milly?” Her face crinkled in confusion. “And what’s a dime?”

“Don’t worry about it!” I coughed. “Pretend you didn't hear anything. So! What do you think?”

The devilish witch crossed her arms. “Who’s changing the subject now?”

“Oh, oh no. I’m feeling compelled to make rash decisions and select abilities at random. Mercy me!” I feigned.

“Don’t you dare!”

“I dare you!” Jellybee added.

“Then help me before I start taking career advice from Jellybee!”

Bonny grimaced at that. She thought for a moment, fingernails tapping on the table. “Read them all back to me one more time?”

“You weren’t listening the first time? Clean out that earwax.”

She huffed. “It’s difficult to parse what the abilities do. There’s no description at all for the first Skills and Powers you got? No drop-downs, pop ups, or blue lettering? No detail or informal advice regarding Scrapbook Soulstew or Gardencraft? And none of the offerings from your first level up returned?”

“Nope. Nada. Zilch,” I said firmly.

“Are you sure there’s no option to turn Tool-tips back on?”

“Positive. I spent half the night looking.”

“Then I need to hear them again, to read in between the lines.”

I grumbled, but complied. I slowly read through my stat screen, including all the Skill and Power descriptions I had received on both level ups before this point. Then read through all the new options I had been offered on this most recent level up I received last night.