Cassandra Pendragon

“That’s… unexpected. Where is it coming from, if you don’t mind me asking,” the wolf hybrid, Faelan, asked, her red eyes narrowed suspiciously. We were huddled together under one of the smaller cherry trees, the curious onlookers kept at bay by a breathing wall of gold that had promised us a few, uninterrupted minutes. Her sister in arms, Anna, simply stared, her mouth working silently. Maybe I should have bothered with an explanation after all. No one would be able to spot the ship for at least another half hour and brushing them off simply because I didn’t feel like talking wouldn’t have been fair.

The honest answer would have been because Greta had asked me to, but the… truth was probably a bit more complicated than that. “Several reasons. Summed up I guess it’s something I’m doing for you, without much of an agenda. A change of scenery might be what you need and I can probably use the help.” The last part wasn’t strictly accurate, I’d rather heave less people to worry about than more, but it wasn’t a lie, either. Considering how everything I touched had a tendency to go to hell and back before breakfast I might yet find myself grateful for two extra sets of hands.

“Bullshit,” Faelan growled, her cadence much closer to her wild heritage than her graceful appearance. “We’ve watched you and we’ve listened. You always seem like you blindly hand out favours but you never do. There’s always something you might get out of it. What is…” I didn’t mean to, but from one second to the next I found myself in her face, silvery flames reflected in her widening pupils.

“Think carefully before you finish that sentence,” I breathed, barely able to keep my powers from leaking into my voice. In a few minutes I’d probably be regretting this and trying to figure out what had set me off, but for now I simply knew that I was done with being questioned by people I had tried to help, whether altruistically or not. “I’m not a decadent, obese sack of filth who needs to toy with you to feel strong but if you ever compare me to him again, and I know that’s where this is coming from, I’ll show you just how much of a difference there is between us. Have I made myself clear?” She didn’t back down but her breathing became shallow and a musky scent, like frightened dog, wafted around my nose.

“Do you think we’re not used to being threatened,” she asked. I took a step forward, expecting her to stagger but she held her ground.

“I’m not threatening you,” I replied quietly, my voice sending shivers through her sleek fur. “Don’t you see? This is why I want you to come with me. How often do you think you can pull shit like this with others before you find yourself hurtling towards the ocean?”

“Because you’re patience and forgiveness incarnated,” she scoffed. It took quite a lot of self control to keep myself from slapping her and, truth be told, I wasn’t even sure if it would have been such a bad idea. Still, despite myself I closed my eyes and took a deep, calming breath. They were hurting, probably more than I could even imagine. Hadn’t I just learned a lesson about not judging people before I had walked a few miles in their shoes?

“I most decidedly am not and you don’t need either from me, but why are you clawing at my eyes like I’m trying to steal your firstborn? You know what don’t answer that. I’ll do it for you. You, both of you, have been hurt and there’s no one in the world you feel you can open up to except for each other. There has to be a hidden agenda behind every word, isn’t that right? That’s the reason for my offer. I don’t mind. I neither need your trust nor your friendship to keep you out of trouble because, if push comes to shove, I can make you do whatever the hell I want. If you remain here and act like this around the rest of my family or anybody else for that matter you’re going to find yourselves all alone or dead within a few days. In case you haven’t noticed, the world isn’t much nicer to two lonely girls than Asra has been and that’s all I’m going to say. Make up your mind. If you come find me before we leave I’ll have my answer, if not… well, I still wish you the best of luck, even though I don’t think you’ll get very far on your own.” I whirled around but before I could take more than a few, haughty steps another voice called me back. One I had only heard once before when she had thanked me.

“Wait,” Anna whispered. I stopped in my tracks but didn’t turn around.

“What?” I heard their robes rustle when they moved and I could almost picture them, standing side by side, communicating with a single touch.

“You’re right,” she continued, her soft voice barely able to overcome the noise in the overcrowded Garden. “We need help. Still… can I ask one question?” I jerked noncommittally but I could feel my ears swivel towards her of their own accord. Damn it, at least I had gained enough self control to keep my tails from wagging when I didn’t want them to. “Are you sure you can give it to us? We don’t need a warden, we need someone to show us… the light.”

Oh, sweet irony. I almost chuckled. She couldn’t know but the way she had phrased her request… sighing, I turned around. “Honestly? Probably not. The world I live in isn’t any better than the one you’ve just escaped from. What I can show you wouldn’t help, I think. But… I’m pretty sure you’re not going to like what I’ve got to say, still, here it goes. For your wounds to heal you have to see, to experience the… light that’s already everywhere around us. I don’t think you can do it on your own, there’s too much shit happening that’ll make you recoil, that’ll make you want to hide. I can’t change that, no one can. I’m simply offering you a place to return to, a place to feel safe and… yes, protected. Somewhere you can take refuge when it becomes too much, until you’ve found the strength to go out on your own again.”

“A home with our royal, divine godmother waiting for us with a bowl of hot soup when we scratch our knees,” Faelan asked with a brave attempt at sounding mocking but the watery gleam in her eyes put the lie to her words. I shrugged.

“If you want to phrase it like that, sure. As long as you don’t expect me to put you into bed or read you stories.”

“What can we expect of you, then,” her human friend asked.

“That no one like Asra is ever going to get close enough to you to hurt you again. That… and you can expect me to listen. I’m not going to indulge your every whim but if you need my help, I’ll be there. That’s all you’re going to get.” They shared a look before the hybrid mumbled:

“Why do you think we don’t have friends around here who would do the same for us?”

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“Because I was the one who stood between you and your so called friends, ready to tear you apart for killing a monster. As far as I remember there wasn’t any one lining up beside me to rush to your aid. But, by all means, stay here if you think that’s what’s best for you.” An uncomfortable silence spread between us, as far as silence could even spread under the circumstances. The occasional whoops and cheers, as well as the noisy consumption of scrumptious food and strong liquor, surely provided a rather incongruous backdrop to our conversation.

I was already fidgeting, the situation about as comfortable as snuggling up to a hedgehog, when a shaky, insecure smile spread across Faelan’s face. “Why,” she wanted to know. “Why do you…”

“Care? Because its my goddamned duty and because I want to. I’m sure you’ve heard the phrase noblesse oblige before… it’s mostly just an empty promise but when you’re… it doesn’t matter. Look, you’ve made it plenty clear that you think I’m actually trying to get something out of everything I do and you’re not entirely wrong. It’s just not what you make it out to be.” With a crooked smile I explained: “imagine you’re stumbling across a small, malnourished wolf pup in the wild. It’s been abandoned by its pack. You can either leave it there and allow nature to run its course, you can kill it outright, as an act of mercy or simply because you want to, or you can try to help. Is there anything in it for you? Probably not. You’re going to curse it while it grows and even if you manage to keep it alive, it’s going to leave you, sooner or later, because it doesn’t belong in your world. Still, years later you might stumble through the darkening forest, hungry and tired, and there you meet it again. It doesn’t express its gratitude, it doesn’t hug you, it simply leads you to a cave where you can spend the night. Once the sun rises above the horizon it’s gone again, returned to the forest as if it had never been there. I’m not… human and my world isn’t yours. But that doesn’t mean I’m going to turn my back on you.” While I had been talking, Faelan’s smile had widened and when I finished she simply asked:

“Are you calling us pups, animals, untamed or cute?”

“All of the above,” I chuckled. “But if that’s your question I think I’ve made my point. The rest is up to you. I don’t expect anything of you in return, I’m simply offering to take you under my wing.”

“There really isn’t that much of a choice, is there,” Anna breathed.

“There is. I’m not the only one you can turn to.” I gesticulated vaguely towards my granny, who still kept the celebrating tides away from us. “If you manage to get over yourselves and actually ask for help, I’m sure none of the people I know would turn you away. Neither would a few dozen locals I can come up with from the top of my head. The difference is, you would have to ask and I’m offering. Do with it as you will. Unfortunately I still have a few things to take care of.” I squinted my eyes at the sun and added: “half an hour, maybe a bit more. We’ll meet at the entrance to the Great Tree. Join us there or don’t, the choice is yours.” Without another word I whirled around and breathed in deeply. There were so many scents in the air that I had to push a tiny bit of power towards my nose before I managed to locate whom I was looking for. Layla and her mom weren’t far away and luckily Reia, Archy and Estrella were already with them. So was the Madame. With an effort I blanked out the whispered conversation behind me and dove into the surging tide of bodies that swallowed me up as soon as I passed Sera.

“Mom wants to have a family talk before I leave,” I said in passing. “I don’t think she’s banking on your attendance but I’d still like to have you there, if you want to.” A cloud of smoke escaped her when she gasped but before she could voice her surprise I was already gone, snaking my way past cooking pits and barrels, dodging drunken advances and ignoring fragmented cat calls, that withered away as soon as my tails slithered into view.

I followed my nose and soon arrived at a small fire where Archy and Estrella were roasting dough on sticks. A few bowls containing different fruits were arrayed around them while Layla and Reia laid on their backs, counting clouds and munching through the first batch the kids had managed to prepare. For a moment I puzzled over how they had managed to keep their little piece of Eden as quiet as it was but when I saw Alassara and the Madame arguing close by, the latter gesticulating wildly while the former’s eyes were glowing ominously and her fangs were on full display, the question didn’t seem as enigmatic anymore. I had just gotten close enough to understand Alassara’s rich voice, hissing with suppressed anger, when her daughter spoke up:

“Took you long enough. Are you here for me or my mom?”

“Both,” I replied, while I took the last steps and settled down at Reia’s side. The vixen gave me a pinched smile, conveying perfectly that she wasn’t mad anymore but that she hadn’t forgotten the trials I had put her through in my room, either. “More for you, if I’m honest, though. Has your mom already told you?”

“That you’re going to pick me up, once there’s a functioning gateway to the Emerald Island? Or that I’m going to have to go to school with a bunch of arrogant elves on the other side of the world?”

“Not to mention an arrogant vixen,” I added under my breath which promptly earned me a pinch to one of my tails.

“It’s not arrogance if you’re actually as good as you believe,” Reia stated proudly. I cleared my throat and wiggled my tails into a more comfortable position. By now the fluffy appendages were getting in the way more often than not, especially when I tried to sit down.

“Be that as it may… why do you sound like we’ve stolen your favourite cookie, Layla?”

“Because neither you nor my mom bothered with asking me what I actually want,” she replied. I knew she was trying to sound civil but she wasn’t yet old enough to suppress the spite in her words, nor the intensifying glow in her eyes. To add insult to injury she was even starting to smell differently, but that might also have been her mom who, judging from the low hissing sound that reached my ears, was about as close to losing her temper as Layla. Oh well, Alassara wouldn’t suck the Madame dry for no reason and if I had to keep an eye on Layla in the future I had to make sure she didn’t start seeing me as some kind of nanny who tried to take her away from her mom.

“Alright, let’s have it. I imagine you don’t want to go. Why?”

“Because our family has been reduced to dust and I can help my mother a hundred times better than some former whore with nothing to lose,” she spat. Ouch. Insecure and jealous. Not surprising, considering her age, but also something I couldn’t do much about. I was just a valve, her mom was the one she had a bone to pick with.

Either it was really clever or utterly stupid but I reached over and stole her half finished twist bread. Her mouth opened in silent protest while I began chewing. “Not bad,” I commented. “Some honey and butter and it’d be great.”

“Why… how… that’s mine,” she spluttered.

“Was. I think we can readily agree that it’s not anymore. I’ve eaten it.” I had to suppress a smile when her fingers turned into claws. She closed her eyes, her delicate nose quivering while she fought for control. Chuckling quietly I stretched, exposing the arch of my neck to her until another jolt of pain raced through my tails.

“What was that for,” I complained while I hastily removed the silvery limb from Reia’s grip.

“Being a child,” she admonished. “That’s what my mother always did to me when I acted out.”

“Weren’t you the one telling me that you’re older,” I grumbled.

“And apparently I wasn’t wrong. What’s gotten into you? Do you think that’s helpful?”

“Yes, yes I think it is. Turn around, she’s smiling again, isn’t she, and I don’t see a hint of red in her eyes.”

“You don’t actually have a clue what you’re doing, do you,” Layla suddenly asked, her voice back to the sweet, enticing cadence I was used to.

“More often than not I don’t. Not this time, though. Wanna guess what I tried to say?” She rolled her eyes.

“Toughen up. If there’s something I want I should fight for it or try to take it.”

“More or less. At least you could complain to the person you have a problem with.”