Cassandra Pendragon

A bath, during which Ahri had snuck into my room, a warm meal and another glass of wine later, we again stood in front of the Bloody Wolf, the market, or rather the sea of people and wares sprawling away in front of us. Small, colourful stalls filled the open square while the buildings surrounding the place either advertised their services through large banners or noisy barkers. Wave after wave of people made their way through the labyrinth, from hunchbacked servants, out to get groceries for their masters to huge, towering mercenaries, inspecting different weapons.

Herbs, gems, weapons, armour, food, cloth, animals, tomes, scrolls… everything the heart could possibly desire was on sale somewhere, even slaves. A small, enclosed section of the market was reserved for sentient commodities.

After I had convinced myself that I didn’t recognise a single face, I forcefully kept my gaze away from the huddled together, desperate creatures that were either stored in metal cages or chained to wooden posts. The whimpering and the smell of their captivity could, unfortunately, not as easily be ignored. How depraved did a society have to be to allow or support slavery? Even if I had been willing to put aside the plainly evil aspect of selling another sentient creature, of treating them as things, of squashing their will, which I wasn’t, I still wouldn’t have been able to imagine how it could possibly be productive. Those frightful, subjugated beings would never be able to live up to what a free, unshackled person might accomplish. It was simply perverted and a large part of me screamed for me to not just turn a blind eye…

“Well then, I’ll be off,” Pete interrupted my train of thought. “If I’m not back by sundown, would you kindly go looking for me? There’s a tavern close to the harbour, it’s called the Gilded Dream. The owner, a fat, ugly toad, goes by the name Madame Sinis, is the first name on my list. Not much is happening around here without her knowledge. If I’m not there, she’ll know where I’ve gone. Can I leave you alone for a while? Judging from your expression, you’re about to do something stupid and I’d hate it, if you burned down my home. There are also decent people living here, you know? Admittedly they’re a minority, but still…”

“Don’t worry, I’m not going to lose my nerve, at least not until we’ve found my family. Afterwards… we’ll have to see how it goes, won’t we?”

“That’s something… all right, behave yourselves and keep in mind, your supposed to be a rich, ruthless merchant, not an exiled, naive princess. The world can be ugly and your supposed to thrive in it. I’ll see you soon, hopefully.” With a wave he turned around and after a few steps vanished into the crowd, his figure swallowed by the pressing throng of bodies.

“Are you really that bothered?” Mephisto asked, gesturing towards the slaves.

“Aren’t you?”

“Not really, they’re mortal, never forget that. Their life is filled with suffering and in the end, they disappear without a trace. What does it matter to us? It’s no good to get attached.”

“If I truly believed that you think like that, I’d melt your emblem down in a heartbeat with you in it. Fortunately you’re just a hypocrite or do you want me to go over every instance where you put your life on the line to help out? And it hasn’t all been for me either, has it?”

“Believe what you will, but I’m telling you, don’t try to shoulder the woes of the world, they’ll crush you, sooner rather than later and as much as it pains me to admit it, I need you, we need you, alive and sane. You won’t stay that way if you can’t keep you distance.”

“He’s right,” Ahri added. “Don’t look at me like that, you know he is. I… your compassion is one of the reasons I fell in love with you but you can’t protect everyone, Cassy. And sometimes, you simply have to let go.”

“Then why are the both of you even here,” I replied scathingly. “To humour me?”

“Girl, use that noggin of yours for something else than turning heads,” Mephisto retorted sharply. “Yes, we’re here because of you but that doesn’t mean we don’t care for your family. They’re fine people and I’d like to have them back as well, but in the end, if we can’t find them, I’ll move on, and so should you. It won’t be the last time, in what I hope will be a long cycle, that somebody close to you dies. Get used to it. And as for those wretched creatures,” he gestured towards the section filled with slaves, “they’re fucked and there’s nothing you can do to change that. What do you imagine we could do, even if we wanted to? Burn the city? Make them survive on their own? Free them and take them with us? You know as well as I that the latter isn’t possible and the former would be cruel beyond imagination. They’d starve on the devastated earth we’d leave behind, without hope, lonely and afraid. They’d curse us for our troubles. Grow up Casandra, and don’t use us as an outlet for your mood. True enough, it sucks, but it’s neither our fault, nor is it your responsibility. Freedom comes at a price, you should know that by now.”

Blood rushed to my cheeks and I felt my temper rise but when I tried to speak, the words wouldn’t come. What could I say? Rationally, I already knew they were right, but unfortunately that didn’t mean much. It all just felt so wrong. What good was my power if I couldn’t use it to at least try to change the world? Wouldn’t I be just as guilty as the ones, who put those poor souls into chains? Of course I wouldn’t but obviously I had needed someone else to tell me that.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to blame you… it’s just, I always thought that looking the other way was cowardice, a way to keep your conscience clean… I don’t want to do that.” Ahri took a step forward and gently place her hand on my shoulder.

“There’s a difference between reality and morality. You’re no god, Cassy. Sometimes, you have to compromise.” I rubbed my cheek against her fingers.

“Funny how that goes, isn’t it? I have the power, or will have it sooner or later, to topple gods, but I still can’t compare myself to one.”

“That’s actually a good thing,” Mephisto interjected. “For as long as you struggle with what’s right and wrong, you’re still alive. Omniscience, even within a single world, means stagnation and I assume you’ve learned enough from your memories to realise where that leads. Come on then, while I know fully well that you won’t be able to enjoy the sights, we should still have a look around. Even if I can’t imagine that we’ll just stumble over a trace of our friends, we still have to search and I should probably buy the ingredients for the ritual. It would be a shame if we actually managed to find them, only to watch while Aspera and Astra wither away. Let’s stick together and visit the more esoteric places around here, shall we? And who knows, if we have a little time to spare, we might even have a chance to deal with everything you’ve still stored away in your stamp, not to mention repairing your spear. Strange as it might seem, I don’t think we’ll get closer to anything resembling free time in the foreseeable future.” I took a deep breath and nodded, allowing Mephisto to lead us it into the churning chaos ahead.

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It was still troubling to make my way through the cacophony of noises and smells, past humans of all shapes, sizes and colours, but I was beginning to adjust, the overwhelming onslaught reduced to a monotone buzz at the edge of my perception. I allowed the plethora of impressions to simply flow over me without taking hold. After a while, I even began to enjoy the sights as we passed from one stall to the next, the wondrous things we encountered extraordinary enough to make me almost forget what was happening only a few stone throws away.

From a vendor who sold a variety of soft, warm eggs that he claimed would hatch into giant bats, large enough to carry a man around, to stalls filled with extravagant jewellery made from silver and precious stones, we slowly meandered deeper into the market. From time to time Mephisto emphasised that we weren’t an easy target by leisurely slapping a purse cutter into tomorrow but aside from the occasional, violent outbursts, I began to understand why markets were so popular among humans. Not only were there things on sale I had never even heard of before, like glittering crystals that supposedly grew on their own and spices that could neutralise toxins and change the taste of anything they were used on into something completely different, every merchant even told fascinating stories about the origin of their wares, captivating enough to truly make me feel like I was visiting the places they had been bought from.

We strolled from the highest mountains of the northern isles, covered in eternal snow and famous for the purity of their gems to the deepest jungles of the southern reaches, where the most expensive herbs grew amidst the deadly plants and ravenous beats of the wild. We visited the exquisite blacksmiths of the Forgotten Mines, fawned over the artful masterpieces elven tailors had produced from cloth so soft, it almost felt like liquid in my hands and marvelled over carefully crafted tomes, made from the bleached hide of beasts I had never heard of before. And while I was being led through the different parts of this world, the wondrous sights slowly improved my dark mood.

It didn’t take long until I was the one to pull my companions from stall to stall, a growing smile on my face. I didn’t buy anything, I was much too inexperienced to tell which objects were just glorified junk and which truly were worth the asked price, but I still enjoyed myself, despite the gnawing worries that came over me, every time I remembered why we were here. Even the loud, cruel advertisements that reached me, when we came too close to the slaves, didn’t burden me as much a they had before.

While Mephisto haggled for one trinket or the other, Ahri and I simply took the chance to escape our reality and spend the day together, sauntering from one corner of our continent to the next. It was surprisingly easy to get lost within the cornucopia of wares, impressions and stories, to forget that the displayed wealth was, for the most part, born from the suffering and exploitation of unseen masses, but in the end, Mephisto had been right. I simply couldn’t change that and I might just as well try to make the best of it.

“Thank you,” I whispered in Ahri’s ear while the demon was bargaining for a small emerald.

“What for?”

“Putting my head on straight. I needed that.” She shuffled clumsily, on the verge of kissing me, but she remembered our disguise just in time.

“You’re very welcome. Anytime you need someone to haul you over the coals, I’ll be there.”

“Gee… great. Something to look forward to.” I pretended to watch Mephisto haggle for a while and allowed my gaze to roam freely across the market. I covered my face with my hands and peeked through the gaps between my fingers to conceal the silvery glow that shone from my eyes as I flushed them with power before I innocently asked: “how much has he spent, anyways? Do you still have a few spare coins?”

“Some, it’s phenomenal how much you can buy with a little gold. And I’m beginning to think we still overpaid for our lodgings by a mile. A part of the money is probably going to find its way into Pete’s pockets, but I won’t begrudge him a coin or two if he can help. Why do you want to know, anyways?”

“Do you see the fountain over there? The one with the marble dolphins? From time to the time the pickpockets and beggars swiftly talk to that old geezer in its shadow. No, the one in the dirty, beige robe without any hair on his head. I’d be willing to bet they’re organised and he’s somewhat further up the ladder. We should talk to him and I imagine he’ll understand us much more easily if he sees a little gold.” Ahri allowed herself to be pulled in by an over ambitious merchant, her eyes seemingly fixed on his wares, while she tried to get a glimpse of the man I had described.

He appeared like an old, weathered sailor who had decided to spend his last few years on land. Strong hands, broad shoulders and bendy legs were still perceptible under his ungainly attire, even though he had made an effort to conceal his still strong body. Wrinkles spread across a pockmarked face, like fractures in a mirror, dominated by a pair of bright blue eyes. A small tattoo peeked from his collar, a stylised, black anchor and a few scar ran across his light brown hands.

Just then, another child, a boy of maybe six summers, made his way towards him and we saw them exchange a few words followed by a series of fluid gestures. When the boy moved on, he inconspicuously stumbled and the old man quickly caught him before he could fall. I hadn’t seen it but I was almost certain that a few purses had just changed the owner. They went on their merry way afterwards, the boy disappearing in the crowd and the sailor leaning back with closed eyes, for all the world nothing but a senior who enjoyed the warming rays of the sun.

“Sneaky,” Ahri said after she had extracted herself from the disappointed vendor. “You’re right, I think. Do you have any idea what you want to say to him? The truth won’t fly, I can tell you that much.”

“I’m working on it, but if we don’t stop muttering, I’m pretty sure we’ll be made, there are a millions eyes all over the place. Come on, I’m certain the demon can fend for himself and I’m not convinced he’s going to be of much help. Unless the lad proofs to be completely stubborn.”

She nodded her agreement and followed me towards the fountain. With every step we took, the distance between us grew until we became nothing more than a rich merchant and her loyal guard. One of the advantages of growing up in a palace, I wasn’t a bad actress, not at all and I knew very well how to either disguise or fake friendship, even adoration. Fooling an uncultured pirate thief shouldn’t be a problem, right? A little more conviction and I might even start believing it myself.

When we reached the small dais and marble steps, I leisurely made my way around the fountain, pretending to study the craftsmanship. I couldn’t help but notice that the dolphins were indeed finely carved, much more so than I would have expected in a public market. Surprisingly they weren’t damaged, each figure pristinely preserved on its pedestal. Vandalism in one of the centres of town was probably a bad idea, one of those crimes that were actually punished. But then, why would theft be tolerated? Because the money stayed in town? Nothing lost for the ones at the centre of the web, no matter where the coins were spent.

“Good sir, could I have a moment of your time? I’m new in town and only here for a few nights. You struck me as someone who knows this town inside and out and I couldn’t help but wonder if you were willing to grant me your advice?” I had spoken with a slow drawl but still in the common tongue. His eyes flew open and he scrutinised me from head to toe before he smiled:

“Madame, forgive me for starin’, but Ol’ Tom isn’t used to women chatting him up no more. Those days are gone… but what can I do for you? If all you need is advice, I’ll have plenty to share, don’t you worry.”

“Perfect, that’s what I hoped. I’m searching for rare commodities, I’m a trader, you see…”