Cassandra Pendragon

Distractedly, I twirled the pitch black ring around my finger, barely sparing a second glance for the crowded streets Alassara was leading me through. I knew I should have focused on the present instead of brooding over my fractured past, but there was one thing I simply couldn’t let go of. What was that thing? The first piece of corruption? A demonic weapon? Ever since I had met Lilith, the question had been fluttering though the back of my mind and now, I was finally able to put a finger on why it was bugging me so much.

I couldn’t get past Lucifer’s memories of when he had decided to nick it from hell. He had been so sure it was nothing but a focus, a tremendously powerful one, but still mainly an artefact that allowed the demons to unite and channel their powers. And from what I had experienced when I had met Lilith, it definitely worked that way. But apparently that wasn’t the whole truth. If I could believe the scenes I had witnessed form the first war, it’d be something much worse. Not that I truly doubted them. It simply explained too much. Why it had been hidden and sealed away, why Amazeroth had been the one to do it, why it didn’t effect me at all, why Lucifer had given it to me… it all made sense. Unfortunately, it didn’t really help. I’d still have to figure out what had happened back then and for all intent and purposes, I was also responsible for the glaring gap in the memory off most immortals. But why? Simply to help protect the Aretes? I didn’t buy that.

Ultimately, it would have been much better to try and hide them and convince our family they were gone, or maybe even openly declare our support... But sealed truths which were still accessible to some? Either the both of us had been unbelievably naive or there had to be another reason. I had an inkling feeling that it was somehow tied to whatever Ahri… Aurora had promised the Aretes and why she had bound herself to them so thoroughly, but I simply didn’t know. And that scared the living hell out of me. Maybe I’d have been able to shove it away if it had been solely my own past and future that hung in the balance but I wasn’t willing to risk Ahri’s. Not now, not ever.

Sighing, I forced my fingers to relax and release the small band of darkness. Nothing I could do about it now. Maybe next time I was going to dream I might be able to focus on those intimidating, foreboding depths of memories I had stayed well away from before, but for now, I had to stick to the present. It would do neither her nor me any good if I got lost in a past I had sacrificed to have the future I was now living in. I had promised myself back on Boseiju that I was done dancing to someone else’s tune and it was about time to act on it. For better or for worse.

And that meant no more disguises, no more hiding and no more running away. And probably a few hours spent behind locked doors to conjure a spear, set free a strange, winged serpent and summon a silver cube I had forged on Earth. Afterwards… oh well, one step at a time. Judging from past experiences, something would come up along the way in any case. Especially since I had already caused a small ruckus, I realised the very moment I raised my eyes from my hand.

Alassara and I had headed straight for the house we were now staying in and I hadn’t bothered with covering my tails or face. I was still wearing the torn, stained dress Captain Dawn had given me and while the midday sun made it almost impossible to see the glow of my skin, it still seemed closer to opaque silver than living flesh. Combined with my looks and the beautiful, probably infamous woman at my side, I had yet to see a single person whose head we hadn’t turned. And since some of them were pushing overloaded carts through narrow, clogged up streets, a few minor accidents had occurred. Well… I say minor, but truth be told…

The vampire had deliberately stayed away from the markets we would have passed, but she hadn’t bothered with sticking to shadowy, empty back alleys. For a while, it hadn’t made much of a difference, but when one of the workers had been busy staring after us instead of watching the road and had ran head first into a heavily loaded wain, filled with fruits, disaster had run its course. Colourful curses, mixed with the surprisingly obscene sounds of ripe melons exploding on the ground filled the air and quickly enough, everyone’s attention shifted to the protagonists who stood, red faced, a few steps apart and began a truly legendary shouting match. Suppressing a smile, I tugged on Alassara’s sleeve and gestured towards an empty passage between two windswept buildings, more than eager to get away from the scene before we were dragged into the ensuing chaos.

She nodded and we quickly made our way through the slowly growing crowd, for once almost invisible since the epic squabble drew everyone’s gaze, especially when bits and pieces of melon started flying through the air. Admittedly, I felt a few hands brushing across my body while I wiggled through the bystanders but to my surprise, most stayed within bounds. And the two who didn’t… well, despite my appearance my strength was even greater than a vampire’s when I flooded my muscles with energy and they quickly learned that feeling up a stranger on the street could result in bruised ribs and an unrivalled view of the stained cobblestones while they still asked themselves why they were suddenly lying in the dirt, blood dripping from a laceration.

“Walking through the streets at your side can turn into an adventure all on its,” Alassara chuckled. “There’s never a dull moment with you, is there?”

While we leisurely strolled past discarded debris and the smelly reminders of why underground canalisation was one of the most cherished achievements of society, I wrinkled my nose and took great care to not inhale too deeply as I replied: “that was as much on you as it was on me. But I’m starting to see why most nobles always have a good dozen of guards with them, when they go out, at least in the stories I’ve read.” Despite my shallow breaths, a scent I had smelled before tickled my nose. Expensive, fragrant oils, nearly imperceptible through the stench.

“I thought you were a princess? Didn’t you have those back home?”

“Still am, thank you very much… although, there’s probably not much left of what makes the title meaningful. And no, I didn’t. I didn’t leave the palace grounds, much, except to visit my teacher and no one would have been stupid enough to bother me on the way. Plus, Ahri was my maid back then…” I paused and swallowed the lump of rising sadness. “Gods, I make it sound like that was in another life, but it’s been no more than a few weeks… anyways, she made quite sure that I didn’t have to deal with anyone I didn’t want to except for formal occasions. And those consisted of a very different crowd. More verbal barbs and innuendos and less physical contact. I could have used someone to keep me out of trouble but burly guards probably wouldn’t have done the trick.”

“If I may, I can smell your grief but you don’t sound like you miss it very much. How come?”

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“I’m missing my home, the people I’ve lost… my father,” I added quietly. “But I’m not particularly sad that I’m not stuck in a palace anymore. A gilded cage is still a cage. A platitude, for sure, but thinking back I didn’t have that much freedom. Everybody scrutinised my every move and when I made a mistake, it wasn’t me who had blundered but rather the royal family. It’s not much fun to grow up like that. Also, I’ve never had the easiest time getting along with people.”

“Huh? Judging from the scene we just left, I assumed they would have fallen over their feet to have a chance to get to know you.”

“Oh, they did, some of them at least. But… Alassara, based on the years I’ve lived in this body I’m a child, younger than your daughter, by far. And that’s also what I looked like. Adults treated me like a fragile jewel and I’ve never been able to connect with normal kids. I… even back then I couldn’t get myself to see them as anything but vulnerable and precious. Not exactly the foundation of friendships. And when it changed, when I was taken seriously, I was already tails deep in a quagmire of shit that ultimately cost me my home. So no, I don’t particularly miss my circumstances but I’d easily give my tails or wings to be able to turn the clock back. But from what I’ve learned, that’s something even I can’t do. Not without making everything worse.” Towards the end, my voice had become more subdued, the fiery end of Boseiju a heavy weight that had once again settled on my shoulders.

Alassara took my hand and squeezed it lightly. “Gods, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have brought it up. For all that it’s worth, I think you’re remarkable and not just because of what you are. I… I didn’t know much about your life, about the trials you went through and I still used you, badly. But yet… did you know that you and that fiery girl of yours are the first persons, aside from myself, my daughter trusts?”

“No… no, I didn’t,” I snivelled, still wrestling with the images of mutilated kitsune and burning cherry blossoms that tried to consume me. “She’s an amazing girl,” I added forcefully. “A bit scary from time to time but I imagine that comes with her nature. You did right by her and I’m glad I could help the two of you. But next time… just ask. I won’t say no.” She laughed, an unbound, happy song, filled with hope and relief.

“I’ve come to understand that much about you,” she finally said. “And I’m sorry for that, too, but I already told you as much. But now that we’ve circled back, there’s something I’ve been wondering. You’re hard pressed, more or less one of the few people who even know how much danger we all are in, but yet you didn’t want my service, you even recoiled from the idea, in a way. Why? You didn’t know… you still don’t know me very well. Wouldn’t it have been much easier and probably better to guarantee my loyalty? I would have sworn any oath you could have come up with, but yet you didn’t make me. I’m just curious as to why.” I shrugged.

“Forced loyalty is worth about as much as the dirt under our boots and… I might have been mad at you but I understood why you did it. That’s why I asked if you loved your daughter. I’d never press a mother into a conflict that might endanger her family. I’m not that cruel.”

“But you’re willing to risk this world to stick to your, forgive me, romanticised notions of how loyalty and friendship should work?”

“Yes and no. I think I’ve already come a long way. A few weeks ago… let’s just say the Mask wouldn’t have been the only one I would have burned to ashes. That the slave markets still exist… that’s me accepting I can’t change to world, at least not on a whim. But that doesn’t mean I’m willing to bend my own ideals when it comes to what I’m doing myself. Maybe that’s stupid but I’m not going to accept anyone’s service or oath, as you put it, when they’re not given willingly. And yours wouldn’t have been. You felt obliged by your strange culture and my own actions to repay me, somehow. I’d rather have you at my side out of your own conviction or not at all.”

“You know, as much as I appreciate the sentiment, that’s no way to lead, it can’t be.”

“Well, I don’t think I’m cut out to be a leader in the long run anyways. Compromises, half truths, the good of the many outweighing the good of the few… that’s not the world I live in, or rather, that’s not the world I want to live in.”

“Surprising, really. In a way, I expected you to see us mere mortals as… cattle. Or rather, similarly to how some vampires regard humans as… lesser or, at least, less capable of making decisions. You must have seen so much… your experience, your age, the things you’ve done over the years… can you really swallow watching others repeat the mistakes of the past without intervening?”

“I don’t think anyone, mortal, immortal or somewhere in between is perfect. We all make mistakes, commit atrocities, burn bridges… but we also try to do better, at least some of us. What I am has very little to do with who I want to be and how I act. The real question is, do I think I would thrive in a position of political power? And the answer is no. There are people, some of whom I’m related to, who are much more capable than me in that regard. I’ve got a goal and since it’s pretty much saving everyone form an oncoming storm the likes of which we haven’t had to weather before, I’ll do everything in my power to protect my… our home. But once that’s done… I don’t even think I’ll be here anymore, so where’s the point in trying to forge an iron throne supported by shackles and threats?” A small smile tugged on the corners of my mouth. “Some people have made a decent living off imagining exactly how bad of an idea that is.”

“Hmm, I’m not quite sure what you’re taking about but I assume you’re referring to the book you’ve been clinging to since you appeared in the manor?”

“This,” I asked, raising the tome I had taken from Zara. “No, not really. That’s something a bit more personal. I was talking about a book I read in another life. Pretty racy and gory but a rather fascinating tale of how little lip service is worth. Even honest promises break far too easily when they don’t align with what you actually want.”

“And yours?”

“They’re worth a tad more than that, at least I think so. I’ll gladly answer one more question but I fear we’ll have to postpone the interrogation afterwards.”

“And why’s that? You don’t owe me any answers but I have to admit, you make me curious. It’s not every day I get the chance to talk to someone who’s seen and done more than me.”

“Oh, I don’t mind your questions, it’s just… listen closely, above us. We’re not alone.” She let go of my hand and her eyes lost focus while she concentrated on her hearing.

A few seconds after we had left the main road, I had caught a whiff of a familiar scent. Expensive oils, the same ones Tharos had used when he had come to visit us. I had sent a trickle of power to my ears and ever since I had been able to hear the whisper quiet footfalls on the roofs. They had been further away back then, but by now our invisible pursuer had made up for lost ground and was almost above our heads. I wasn’t convinced it indeed was the corpulent kitsune, the steps seemed far to light for his weight, but at the very least whoever tailed us had the same supplier of perfumes. Either that, or they used the same bath. And if that was the case, we were either tailed by one of his lovers or another servant of Captain Dawn who had access to the same luxuries. Although, they weren’t strong enough to cover the hint of decay, that was there just beneath the surface, like a festering wound under a clean bandage.

But why follow us? They had to know where we were going. A trap, maybe? Or were they trying to talk and hadn’t mustered the courage to stop us? The latter seemed far fetched, except Alassara had just emptied out the Dawn manor of everyone whom she had deemed lost. I’d have hesitated as well, if I had been trying to chat up the person who had just murdered half the people I knew.

Alassara’s head snapped up, a red glow breaking through the azure shimmer of her eyes.

“Come down, Silas. You must be burning up by now. I won’t bite and I don’t want revenge on my brother’s soldiers. You know why I killed he others, you’ve got nothing to fear.”

Nothing happened for a moment and then, a rustling, like ripping silk, was followed by a hooded figure falling through the shadows in front of us. “Is that so,” a deep, raspy voice inquired.