Cassandra Pendragon

“Wait… what? You’re going to leave us? Now? I already knew you were moody but I never thought you’d turn out to be a coward.” Alright, maybe that wasn’t fair but I was angry and honestly, a little hurt. Everyone was seated at the dining table, even Morgan had left her room and with Alassara and Layla, the table was starting to feel crowded, especially since all of them were watching our exchange with equal measures of amusement and exasperation.

My brother squirmed on his chair but he didn’t erupt in anger, nor did he back down. “I’m not leaving you. I… Can you stow the attitude for a minute and think about what I’ve said? Do you truly believe that I’ll be of much use to you when you’re going to scamper across the islands? I’m neither likely to endear prospective allies to us, nor am I strong enough to help you with your battles. Those are simple facts. But I still can help out in other ways. Tell me Cassy, do you think you’ll have the time to visit our bother? You can’t be everywhere at once and we’ve already talked about splitting up quite a few times. What’s gotten into you? Are you merely miffed that I decided what I want to do myself without consulting you first? Are you really that petty?” As much as I hated it, I was blushing.

“I… damn it, fine, if you want me to spell it out, here you go. I don’t want to let you out of my sight.” My eyes roamed along the table, including everyone seated there. “Maybe I’m paranoid, maybe I’m a control freak, I don’t really care, but I can’t stand the idea of not being around when you need my help. And don’t tell me that’s not going to happen. Have you been asleep for the last weeks? Because I haven’t.”

“Ye know lass, that’s kinda sweet,” Xorlosh interjected, “but also tremendously stupid and arrogant. Whichever way you spin it, me ‘n me lads have been kickin’ an’ fighting for longer than ye draw breath. Same goes for most of the others. Don’ get me wrong, me ‘n the boys are flattered that ye’ d want to protect us, but we aren’t yer pets and we never will be.” He raised his hand when I was on the verge of interrupting. “Now that we’re talking ‘bout it anyways, it might be as good a time as any to tell ye all, that we’ll be taking our leave as well. We gotta hurry on home. Y’ are of course welcome to tag along but we gotta warn our folks and since we’re not needed around here anymore, it’s as good a time as any. We’ll be stocking up on a few provisions and sail within a day or two. Provided we got ‘em darn pirates out of our brig by then.” He scratched his beard pensively before he continued.

“I think I know where y’re coming from, lass. It’s one thing to tell folks what ye intend to do but quite another to watch them go when you haven’t planned for it, isn’t it? But… except for yer girl, ye can’t expect us to always stay at yer side. But ye know as much, don’t ye? So why don’t ye tell us what’s really got yer knickers in a knot?” Everyone’s attention turned to me and I had to admit, it wasn’t easy letting down my proverbial pants in front of them.

“I… I’m afraid, damn it! You want to know what’s changed? Them,” I said, pointing at the vampire queen who had her daughter in her lap. “I’ve realised what’s gotten me through the last weeks and it’s all of you. I… just ask them if they would separate for anything in the world. I… I lost my home, the same as all of you and I can’t bear the thought of going through it once again. Because that’s what you are to me. Our band of ragtag misfits has become just that, a home, a place where I feel safe. I don’t want to give that up.”

“Hon,” my mum intervened, “I’m glad you feel that way, I really am, but that’s… what do you imagine is going to happen from now on? Do you think we’ll all just stay somewhere safe so you have a place to return to? That’s not what I’ve taught you and that’s not really what you want, is it? I think I still know some parts of your personality better than you know them yourself and you’re lying, most of all, you’re lying to yourself. In some ways… you’re afraid of failure, aren’t you? You’re afraid you’ll mess up, now that you actually have a chance to do something, now, that you’re not forced to simply keep on trodding forward. From now on, it won’t be bad luck or shitty circumstances but your… our own decisions that cause us hurt and pain. And to compensate, you want to preserve what’s important to you, to keep it safe and far away from the potential fallout of your mistakes. Cassy… remember back on the island when you wanted to stay? I felt almost the same but I still would’ve let you. It hurts, it sucks but it’s necessary and we can’t waste the few resources we actually have. Come on, Cassandra, you’re better than this. You don’t have to like it, hells, I know I don’t, but you can still smile and wish your brother the best of luck. He’s going either way and the least you can do is put on a brave face and send him off properly. Besides, he won’t be alone, will he?”

“What do you mean,” I quickly asked, a foreboding feeling spreading through my chest.

“We talked quite a bit before your return. I’m going to tag along. You’re… from what you’ve told us you’ll have to go to the elven capital in a week and afterwards you’ll be off to visit Ahri’s family and then, there is that draconic naming ceremony you committed yourself to. Those are things… essentially, those are things you’ll have to deal with with your friends. You are my daughter and you always will be, but, and trust me, it wasn’t easy to come to that conclusion, there are parts of your life I can’t help you with. As much as I want to, it would do neither me nor you any good if I were to remain at your side for now. Besides… I have two more children and I think they need me more than you do, at least for now.” I was speechless for a moment.

Rationally, I knew she was right, but that didn’t help, not in the slightest. Something had triggered me and if I had been forced to guess I would have put my money on two things. Firstly, despite who I was, I still harboured the soul of a child in my body and I was decently convinced she was moping right about now. Secondly, even the immortal aspect of my being didn’t deal particularly well with abandonment, I had had more than enough of it in my previous life. Basically, I didn’t mind for as long as I was the one leaving, but being left… that didn’t sit well with me. I felt like my family was being torn apart, all over again. Like I said, maybe a bit unfair but I couldn’t help it. All I could do was suck it up and put on a brave face, like my mother wanted me to. And maybe reduce the temper tantrum to a minimum. A soft touch shook me from my thoughts.

“I know how you feel, I truly do,” Ahri whispered. “And you can rage and cry all you want, once we’re alone, but don’t do it now. It’s okay to be a hypocrite, we all are, but you can’t act on it. You’ll do yourself and your family a huge disservice. Besides, they really are right. But I think you know that. Now, smile and tell them you’re sorry, even if you don’t mean it.” I snaked one of my tails around her leg and squeezed it lightly.

“I… of course you’re right,” I said loudly and with much more conviction than I actually felt to cover up how much my voice trembled. I turned towards my brother and added: “you’re no coward, quite the contrary and I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. I can’t pretend I like what you’re going to do but that doesn’t mean I’ve got the right to try to stop you… and if mum is going to be with you, I’ll most certainly see your infuriating face again,” I added with a lopsided smile. “Still… you’ll look out for each other, won’t you? Please, promise me at least that much.”

This narrative has been unlawfully taken from Royal Road. If you see it on Amazon, please report it.

“Do you think I’m accompanying him to have some sort of vacation? Maybe board a pleasure cruise while I’m at it? Of course I’ll look out for him, him, Arthur and Reia. We’ll take the little vixen and her friends with us, whether she likes it or not.”

“Don’t I get a say in the matter at all,” the girl in question piped up. “I’m right here, you know?”

“No!” At least in that regard, we were all of one opinion.

“Fine,” I continued and pointedly ignored Reia’s protests which was more difficult than I had thought since Estrella and Archy also decided to speak their mind. None of them were particularly happy with being treated like luggage. “So, where does that leave us? When do you intend to go?”

“Well,” Mordred replied, “we know Arthur isn’t too far away, he’s sailing to pick up the kids, after all. We were thinking about asking him to come here so he could pick us up. That would still give us a couple of days to settle matters here and once you’re off to the north, we’ll join him. Unless… what about the rest of you? The dwarfs are going to head back home and I imagine the rest will go with Cassy or am I mistaken?” Erya was the first to reply.

“We,” she included Auguros and Morgan with a sweeping gesture, “will. If that girl… Zara, wasn’t it, isn’t completely deluded, there’s a war brewing between my family and the elves. I can’t just ignore it. And while these two have more than one bone to pick with their people, they’re still fey. Plus, I’m not going to let my granddaughter out of my sight in the foreseeable future. So I guess your stuck with us, your Highness.” She gave me a mock bow and fell silent again.

“The same holds true for us,” Astra added. “That is, the reasoning, not the relationships behind it. It was our father who instigated the conflict our people are headed towards and it’s our responsibility to make sure we won’t sacrifice our chance to defend our world in exchange for satisfying superficial grievances. Plus, I think you could use our help once you reach the Emerald Island. Elvish politics are convoluted and our knowledge might prove to be invaluable, despite the crystal we prepared for you. Especially if you intend to navigate the upper echelons of our nobility. And from what you’ve told us, that’s exactly what you’re going to do. Unless… you don’t intend to burn down our capital, once you’re there, do you? That would make things…. Awkward.”

“Not if I can help it,” I chuckled and turned towards Viyara. “You’ll come with us, won’t you?”

“I’m not even sure I’ve got much of a choice in the matter, but of course I’m going to go with you. If nothing else…” she was interrupted when Layla suddenly decided to chime in.

“I don’t get it,” she said while she squirmed in her mother’s lap. “Why do any of you even have to leave. I thought you’d stay here, with us. I don’t want you to go,” she added more subduedly.

Her mother gave Ahri and me a stare that pretty much said I told you so before she explained: “Honey, they have their own families and friends to take care of. But I’m sure they’ll come back to visit you as often as they get the chance. Won’t you?”

“Of course,” I replied. “And we still have a couple of days before we’re leaving. Plenty of time to get tired of us.” While I was talking I realised that Reia’s expression had changed. She wasn’t frowning with consternation anymore but looked rather pensive, her eyes sparkling intriguingly. What in all the hells was she planning now? As much as I liked her and wanted to have her around me, I couldn’t deny that it was going to be a load off my chest when she’d be safe and sound on her way to Arthur’s village. I cleared my throat and added as an afterthought: “besides, if your mum is in control of the gateways, we won’t be more than a few days away, wherever we end up.” Not strictly true since I could come up with quite a few scenarios where that wouldn’t work from the top of my head, but I still meant it and I wanted to see her again, her and her mother.

“Which brings us to the present,” Alassara said while she comfortingly stroked Layla’s head. “Whatever either of you is planning afterwards, for now, the question is what you actually want to achieve in this city. Cassandra and I have spoken briefly on the way here… we even met one of my brother’s former servants. As of now, they’re trying to convince the other Captains that I’m a suitable replacement. I’m not convinced they’ll manage but with the information they have gathered from the spies my brother captured, I’m quite sure they’ll be inclined to command their fleets to return. Of course, we won’t know until they join us later tonight, but I think it’s reasonable to assume they’ll be successful, at least in regards to that endeavour. After all, the Captains must have already realised that the Dawn Fleet isn’t as well represented as the other ones. Now, if the ships are saved, the question remains, what then?”

“It largely depends on you, doesn’t it,” my mum replied. “We’re strangers here with out any political power. I guess it’d be much more appropriate to ask what you intend to do.”

“I want this city to change, in the long run and since I’m not forced to battle my brother every step of the way anymore, I even think I’ve got a decent chance. But… that won’t matter if we’re swept away on the tide that’s growing in the East. For years now, the force from across the waves has influenced the Pirates, turned them into a something much closer to an actual fighting force than the ragtag band of brigands they were before. I’m going to do everything in my power to make sure my daughter has a home she can grow up in and for that, I need influence. I need a seat at the table and the resources of my brother. And for both, I dearly need your help.” She turned to me and inclined her head.

“You’ve already done more for me than I could have expected, but I’d like to ask for your support one more time. If the strength of my family was combined with the power you represent, I don’t think it’d be much of a challenge to convince the other Captains that resisting me would be futile. If it was up to me, I’d use the time you have left around here to open the eyes of every human to the dangers that are slowly creeping towards our island. Cassy already mentioned that my brother organised a get together in a few days… and even though the others know that he’s crossed over into the eternal night, I’d still like to go through with it.” She paused to collect her thoughts.

“The other Captains will want to meet me in person and judge how I could fit into their circle. I’d like to use the time we have until then to show everybody just how much strength I could bring to the table. And while my own children will surely make an impression, it’s nothing compared to what you did, Cassandra.” To say I was surprised would be an understatement.

“Huh, what do you mean? Most people around here don’t even know me and the few who do are either dead or they’ve seen me as a pretty toy on your arm. And those would only be the few we’ve met on our way here.” She smiled at me and replied:

“While that’s true, it’s only because they don’t associate the benevolent spirit who has turned the Mask into a vitalising wave of energy with the slender girl in front of me. You haven’t had the time yet to hear it for yourself, but many are convinced that the slumbering gods of ages past are living among us, once again. If it were to become known that you’re the one behind healing the ailing, you’d have people lining up to join your following left and right.” While I was still struggling with what she had said, my mum asked, deadly quiet:

“Now that you’ve brought it up, I’ve been wondering… we know the Mask had the backing of vampires and, whether it’s true or not, we have been told that you’re the one who helped him secure his position in the city. As you might imagine, I’m more than curious who actually helped him capture us, so let me ask directly. Was it you?” Shit, she was right. I had completely forgotten what Tharos had told us but chances were, Alassara was at least indirectly responsible for the pain my family had been forced to go through.

“Yes,” the vampire answered calmly. “In a way, but I never knew what he actually wanted to do. Otherwise he would’ve died by my own hand long before he could have harmed you, this I swear.”