Soon after his screaming ended, our sloth started staring blankly at his stats again, before seemingly having some kind of epiphany, as if seeing hope in a desperate situation.

"...Hey, ghosty?"

"..."

"Hey."

"..."

"HEY-

"WHAT?"

"Can you be honest with me."

"About what?"

"Is-am I...did my handsome face get any...

*shudder*

Uglier?"

"..."

"Tell me, come on. I can handle it."

"Well...your new appearance certainly suits your personality."

...

...Pfft.

"...I knew it. I am just too handsome for some shitty ability to change that."

"Can you please throw my ring away? And while you are at it, kill yourself please."

"It's alright ghostly boy, I know my handsomeness is hard to bear for someone as average looking as you, but don't be too hard on yourself, will you?"

"...I have seen many kinds of people in the hundreds of years of my path to immortality before being killed, some of them so evil and vile even demons would have fled, even the most kind angels would have no mercy, the heavens themselves rejoicing their deaths, but...but you."

"You are the one I wish death the most upon."

"...Would you believe me that's not the first time someone told me that?"

"Yes, yes I would."

If you discover this tale on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the violation.

"...Well, now that this little conversation is over, who wants to burn down a forest?"

Said our hero, forgetting that he has no ability to spawn fire out of nowhere.

"Ability? Abilities are for losers. Watch how the professionals start fires."

...

Standing on a hill a giant sloth, beside him a ghosty figure, watch a blazing fire swallowing a forest,

accompanied by the eerie background sounds of howling beasts and sorrow filled bird like monsters,

grieving over their lost homes and friends.

"You know, never would I have thought I would watch a monster sloth start a fire with some leafs, a stick and some stone. Yet here I am. I hate my unlife."

The forest hates you deeply.

New Title gained

Death marked by Nature

Reserved for those who stand against nature and all it represents, all forest dwelling monsters will

attack you unprovoked. Elves and other Nature-tuned beings will have a deep distrust of you.

For burning down a you Forest and with it not only killing a few of it's inhabits, but also the young

Forest-dryad (C-) bound to it, you gained five levels.

"...Huh, nice, wonder why not everybody just burns down forests for leveling."

"Well, considering it makes you the enemy of every druid, dryad, forest spirit and most elves, only

the insane would burn down a forest. Also it's way harder to burn down an older forest, you would be

lucky if no hidden treant just stood up and stomped you."

"Well, not my problem. That's a problem for future me, and what has that asshole ever done for me?"

…

Inside the ruins of an elven village, one can see a lot of orcs, cheering, drinking and playing catch the ball with the head of some… unfortunate elf, but beside one orc sits a man clad in black, a smile on his face which every one who isn’t an orc would notice is completely forced.

"And then Borgl said to tiny elf, you dumb you no eat brains to get smarter. And then we burned his house down."

And all the orcs who had heard this joke started laughing once again.

"Yes yes, my orc friend I know that. I was there."

"And afterwards, gorg told another tiny elf-

*sigh*

"Hey, Boss you gotta see this!"

"If you just want to show me the impaled heads of those elves again then no thanks."

"No, something way better happened all of you come with me."

Curiosity getting the better of all the orcs and the few man clad in black, they followed him and arrived

at a hill, only to see, far in the distance, a cloud of ash coming from a forest near them.

"The forest we were in before is burning down guys."

Exclaimed the man who led them to this wonderful scenery.

"Huh, you think that that sloth didn't joke when he told us he would "burn all the fucking trees" eventually?"

"No matter, today two forest burn down, that is one more than one. I, wisest of orcs drorg, know what to call this."

Exclaimed the particularity big and… special looking orc who told the bad joke from before.

"Oh, what do your people call such an occurrence my big green friend?"

"A Christmas miracle!"

And all knowingly nodded, small smiles forming everywhere, a harmonious and warm atmosphere forming between these vile barbarian orcs and lawless dark mages. Yet one of them looked more than just a bit confused, seemingly wanting to ask a question yet not having the confidence to.

"...Well, if the narrator already blew my cover, boss?"

"Yes?"

"What is this Christmas? Another one of those warmongering spirits they worship?"

"Don't ask, probably another thing orcs made up, like that one time they claimed a giant rabbit monster

that lays chocolate eggs existed. Just smile and nod with them."

"Huh, orcs are weird boss..."

"They certainly are. Now enough of this little party of ours, let’s show our friend over there how to properly burn a forest down."