Brandy was perfect for speeches. She had that boisterous attitude, which gave her voice a wonderful loudness that didn’t bother the ears. Her voice was thick of emotion yet she did it in a way that made it sound natural. She stood on a small crate, not too far from the large campfire we all sat around, and was nearing the end of her story. One of loss. One of hope.

One that transfixed me almost as much as everyone else.

Almost.

It was interesting. And not just the story itself. Brandy had returned from the Bell Church right as we had all gathered to eat dinner. Instead of telling anyone what she had learned, or done, she instead clambered up on that box and began her story.

By the way everyone was acting; no one else had heard this story before. Or if they had, it was simply that good of one. Or maybe it was just Brandy’s charisma that made everyone listening become so infatuated with her and the story.

Yet as fascinating it was to hear of a strange land, where a princess had been sacrificed and the small band of knights who had gone to save her, I couldn’t stop my mind from wandering.

“And yet, even when their comrade was hurt… they did not rest. They couldn’t! They carried on and,” Brandy continued her story, and I had to shift in my seat again.

My tail hurt. And not just because I was sitting on an uncomfortable little box.

Glancing around at Fly and Tosh, those I was sitting in-between, I realized I needed to just get up and leave… and I’d be able to do so. I was sitting behind them more than not, thanks to how I had sat down last right as Brandy had jumped up onto her little crate and start her campfire story. And they, like everyone else, were completely transfixed by Brandy. Even the Clothed Woman, who sat over near the wagon the campfire had been built nearby, looked entirely fixated on Brandy.

I waited until Brandy turned around away from me, to look at the group across the fire from us. She did that every so often. She slowly turned, and shifted, and even spun around occasionally as to always include everyone watching her into the story. She sometimes even pointed at people, to ask a question, or what they were thinking. It was an odd way of telling a story as to pass the time, and under normal circumstances I wouldn’t even have thought about leaving or anything else… but…

Flinching as another sharp pain shot up my butt and up my spine, I grimaced and glanced around again. To make sure no one was looking or paying attention at me.

No one was.

We were done eating. Most were just drinking, though not everyone was drinking anything but water or tea. The world was dark, and the large fire we were all sitting around was roaring and bright. It and Brandy were loud enough to compensate for everyone being silent.

No one would see me. No one would hear me leave.

Taking a tiny breath, I decided to just do it. I slowly stood, carefully, and felt my heartbeat thump loudly as I stepped away… as no one, not even little Merit who sat a few chairs away, seemed to notice.

Slowly walking away, I headed towards the buildings. The house and church. So that if anyone turned to see what I was doing, they’d hopefully only think I was going to the restroom or something.

It wasn’t wrong for me to leave. I knew no one would actually grow upset over me stepping away while Brandy told her story… but I was tired of people worrying about me and being gentle.

Yes. I was hurt. I was injured. Those very injuries were why I was leaving the fun little circle of happiness. Yet just because I was hurt didn’t mean I needed to be treated like a baby.

They wouldn’t let me help with anything. It’s been three days since we got here, and they still won’t even let me help make tea.

The worst part was their gentle over protectiveness wasn’t just from my injuries, but something more serious.

They were worried for my mental health. Even Tosh, especially Tosh, kept coming over to talk and spend time with me… as if to make sure I didn’t end up like him.

Although it felt… good to have so many people care so much for me, something I’d never had before, I couldn’t help but feel anxious and upset. I wanted to run away… and not just because I felt as if I had made some horrible mistakes lately.

Maybe if I wasn’t hurting so much I’d not be thinking such thoughts… but right now… well…

I flinched as I rounded the church, and wondered how long it would take for my tail to heal. My head wasn’t throbbing anymore, though there was still a nice sized section of bruises and scab covered skin between my ears. My forearms were itchy thanks to the scabby healing skin from those quills, and the bones I had broken were already feeling better… I was actually doing better than I thought I’d be doing, so quickly.

Other than my tail, my right arm and hand were the real concern. It was still wrapped in the sling that they had forced onto me, and it ached more than it itched.

Pausing a moment to look around, I sighed as I realized I had walked behind the church so much I was about to round it entirely. Walking back around it and out into the field would just give them an opportunity to see me and wonder what was wrong.

There wasn’t really anywhere for me to go here. If I went into the church, someone would eventually come in and start talking to me. Same with the house. Plus I didn’t want to sit or lay down. That was why I had gotten up from the campfire in the first place.

Yet there wasn’t much space here. The thick forest that surrounded these buildings weren’t far, and there was only one path nearby. The one that led to the river and lake. It was too dark for me to traverse it, in my condition.

As I scanned the area, I found myself staring at the little fence that Vim had made when we were here last time.

The fence circled and enclosed a small patch of gardens. Ones that had large melon looking things, some that were now missing thanks to them being plucked and eaten earlier.

Walking over to the fence, I smiled as I stepped up to the spot where Vim and I had spoken to one another last time we had been here. It was in the middle of the fence, closest to the house.

Leaning up against the fence, I listened to the loud laughter from beyond the house. Either Brandy’s story had ended, or something interesting had happened. I heard nearly everyone’s voices in those laughs.

If things had not gone the way they had… would I be laughing amongst them? Would I not be feeling the way I was?

It was more than my injuries. It was something much deeper.

I gulped, and did my best to not start crying. Luckily, thanks to our close living proximity lately, I’d not really broken down and cried. But I wanted to. I really did.

I wanted to sob. To curl up in a ball under the covers and just…

Taking a breath, I blinked a little harder than usual to make sure my eyes stayed dry… and then I turned around and slowly sat down. Leaning up against the fence, I made sure to not sit on my tail and let it lay down carefully.

“Damn thing,” I whispered as I got situated. I knew I’d not be able to sit for long before it started to hurt too much. What was I going to do with it? Last time I had broken my tail had been with the witch. She had given me some herbal teas that had kept the pain at bay… but it had still taken more than a month for it to heal.

This time it hurt worse… and not just because I didn’t have that special tea the witch made. The bones had been broken in more places, and in a harsher way.

“Least I still have it,” I whispered as I thought of the woman who had broken it.

I had never gotten to see if she had survived or not. Vim had killed some of them, as had Brom and Merit… but I couldn’t remember her.

Hopefully Vim got her.

“Have what?”

Startling, I turned to find Merit behind the fence. She was smirking at me, and I couldn’t help but doubt my eyes.

“Merit?” I asked as I glanced around. Where had she come from? I had just been looking into the garden… Mere moments ago…

“What? I may have white hair but I’m not a ghost,” Merit said with a snicker.

Well… that was true… but…

Maybe the pain of sitting down had been worse than I thought. I wasn’t paying attention…

I coughed lightly, and was about to turn around and stand up but Merit waved at me. “I’ll sit with you,” she said lightly.

Nodding… I frowned as I watched Merit clamber up and over the fence. She huffed as she rolled over the fence, and fell to the ground next to me.

Why had she climbed over it? The fence wasn’t that large, and only had three beams. She could have just ducked a little and walked under it, thanks to her height.

Merit sat down next to me on my right, and I shifted a little as I became conscious of her. I could still hear Brandy’s voice carrying from the campfire, so I knew her story wasn’t over. Merit must have noticed I was gone and snuck away as I had.

“Brandy’s stories make me queasy. So I’m not surprised you ran away,” Merit said lightly.

“I actually found it rather interesting,” I said.

“Oh? Because it was about Vim?” Merit asked.

“Wait what?” I turned to look at Merit’s face, and her smile told me she was serious.

“Regret leaving now don’t you?” she teased me.

“A little… yes…” I admitted.

She chuckled, and I wondered if I’d be able to hear the rest of the story another day. Maybe Merit or Brandy would tell me about it if I asked.

“Hm… just wait until they really start drinking. Then they’ll start sharing even more secrets about him. It’s disgusting,” Merit said.

“Secrets?” I asked.

She nodded. “You might not really realize it Renn, being so close to him, but most of the Society knows very little about Vim. That’s why they get so fixated and into the stories about him. Watch, once Brandy is done someone else will get up on that box and tell a story they know. I bet it’ll be Tosh next,” Merit said.

“Am I that close to him, Merit?” I asked her.

“Far more than you must realize. You probably got a bunch of stories and know stuff about him that most others don’t,” Merit said.

“You seem to know him well too,” I noted.

“Regrettably,” she mumbled.

I smiled at her. Wonder what Vim had done to earn her distaste for him. It was such a unique hatred.

This story originates from Royal Road. Ensure the author gets the support they deserve by reading it there.

“I was starting to hurt… and although I love everyone for being so overprotective of me, I couldn’t stand the thought of anyone noticing and stopping everything they’re doing just to make sure I was fine. So I ran away as to hurt alone,” I told her the truth.

“Ah… Well, you didn’t make it far!” Merit seemed to find that funny.

“I sure didn’t,” I admitted.

“Can’t blame you. You’re really the only one who got hurt this time Renn… I mean… other than Brom, of course. So everyone’s just being really gentle with you. Plus you’re new, so they’re worried you’ll take it very personally and run away if we’re not careful,” Merit said.

She had got hurt too but was already healed. Completely.

“They’re treating me more like a child than they are Fly,” I complained.

“Fly’s not covered in bandages, Renn,” Merit said gently.

Well… that was true… how was she so unharmed anyway? She had been tossed into that pit too… and we had both gotten chased and attacked…

“You did well there, you know. Protecting her that well. Vim would be proud,” Merit said.

Frowning at the way she phrased that… I wondered if she had said it that way in an effort to make me feel better. Maybe she thought it’d make me happy to hear the idea of Vim praising me.

Well… she wasn’t wrong.

“How long does it normally take Vim to… uh…?” I wasn’t sure how to phrase it.

“Kill everything? Depends. Could be days, could be months. I bet it’ll only take him a few more days though. Once he’s killed everything he’s deemed dangerous, he’ll make sure the humans and the city is safe for us and then will come and let us know. I expect most of us to head to the Bell Church soon. Brandy said she’ll let us know tomorrow,” Merit said.

Oh had she? I hadn’t heard that. Maybe I really was worse than I felt. Not noticing Brandy saying such things… Merit sneaking up on me like that…

“Will he kill… everyone, Merit?” I asked her.

“Yes. Vim can be brutal, Renn. Even when he doesn’t want to be. It’s why I was so surprised he had stayed his hand that day on the roof… He’s usually not that gentle. Though… maybe that was the wrong choice, maybe,” Merit said softly.

Was it? “Him staying his hand earned us Fly,” I said.

“At the cost of Brom, and maybe even Lumen. We don’t know if it’s salvageable yet, Renn,” Merit warned.

I didn’t nod in agreement. “Brom was my fault, Merit,” I said.

Merit scoffed, but didn’t say anything. Didn’t argue with me.

That was kind of her.

Although silence followed… it wasn’t an awkward one, nor was it heavy. We sat side by side… listening to Brandy’s voice carrying on the wind. Thanks to the fact I didn’t need to wear a hat here, my ears weren’t impeded. I was able to hear her clearly, even from the other side of the buildings.

She was talking about the princess. What she had done and said to the knight who saved her from certain doom.

“So that knight was Vim?” I asked.

“Yes. One of them.”

“Who were the others?” I asked.

“I don’t know. The princess is her, Renn. This is Brandy’s story,” she said gently.

My mouth went dry, and I now seriously regretted leaving. How rude of me.

“Don’t feel bad Renn, jeez. I can tell you it later if you’d like. Or anyone else. Brandy tells it all the time,” she said.

“Still…” I sighed as I closed my eyes and listened a little closer. Based off the way Brandy spoke of what the princess had said, and did, she must have been young. Very young.

“She embellishes a little too. It hadn’t been that big of an army,” Merit said with a smile.

“You know that but don’t know who the other knights were?” I asked.

“Oplar told me. She was there. She might have been one of the knights, I guess, if you think of it that way,” Merit said as she crossed her arms and leaned back. She wasn’t tall enough to actually rest against the fence, as I was. Where my back rested against one of the fence’s wooden pickets, her head was what touched it when she was sitting.

“I’ve not met Oplar yet,” I said.

“Oh? Interesting. She was with Vim not too long ago, so I thought maybe you had.”

I shook my head. “She was with him not too long ago?” I asked.

Merit shifted and elbowed me gently in my side. “I don’t mean it that way. Vim killed a Monarch, and Oplar had gotten involved. Just at the right place at the right time. She stuck around with him for a bit after, like she always does. She chases stories, Renn. She’s fascinated by such things.”

Stories. Maybe that was why she went around telling everyone them.

“Well she missed this one,” I said.

“That she did…” Merit sighed.

“If Lumen is… uh… Lost, as you put it… what do we do, Merit?” I asked.

“Well… some of us will go to the Bell Church. Others will likely head to Telmik. A few will likely head to where they’ve been before. Then we’ll have many years of growing pains, as Brandy and the rest slowly rebuild the Animalia Guild, or whatever form of it they use next time,” Merit said.

“Next time,” I said softly.

She nodded. One of her thick locks brushed against my arm as she did. Was she closer? “We’ve had several companies and guilds over the years. I’ve only been here for a short time, as you know… I spent most of my time in the Society in the south, trying to build the kingdom,” Merit said.

“Hm…” A part of me wanted to say I’d like to have seen that kingdom, and been there to help… but I kept my mouth shut. After all every time I tried to help all I ever did was make it worse.

“You’d have liked it Renn. I wish I could have shown you it,” Merit said.

Glancing at her, I went still at the sight of tears glistening in the night.

“I would have loved to see it,” I said gently.

She nodded, and then started twirling her thumbs around each other. The action was very childish. “You know Vim tried his best. He really did. But… well… those involved. They failed. We failed. We weren’t strong enough. Not wise enough. People gave up. They stopped trying. They… betrayed,” Merit spoke softly, yet seriously.

“I see…” I wasn’t sure what to say. Vim did seem to try his best, so that wasn’t a surprise… but it was surprising to hear Merit compliment him.

“You tried your best too Renn. So please don’t… hate yourself too much over this. We were all there too you know? So was Vim. We all equally share in the blame,” Merit said.

Ah. So this is why she was telling me of that kingdom.

She was trying to say my failures… our failures, here now, are not as bad as I felt they were. Since everyone has made them, likely some even worse.

Yet…

“It still feels bad Merit. Even if Brom hadn’t… died… What of all the others? Those Fly had wanted to bring to the Society with her. There had been other children, per her words. We’ve lost them. Doomed them,” I said.

“Then next time be better. Don’t sacrifice everyone in the future you can help just because you stumbled and failed today,” Merit said.

I blinked at her. “I plan to… Really Merit… It’s not like I plan to run away or become like Tosh had been, I promise,” I said.

“Don’t be upset that I’m worried about it. You've been crying the entire night, in your sleep,” Merit said.

“No…” I groaned and covered my face, to rub my eyes. Surely not!

“It wasn’t that bad. You just sniffed and rolled around a bunch. Most didn’t notice, I don’t think,” Merit said kindly.

“Wonderful,” I wondered who had noticed. Merit was likely being gentle with me. Had I kept everyone up then? All night long? Sobbing in my sleep?

“Most will just think it’s your pain, so don’t let it bother you.”

“That’s somehow worse,” I said.

Merit giggled at me, and then leaned closer. I went still as Merit leaned against me, putting her head on my arm. Maybe she was doing it since she couldn’t comfortably lean against the fence…

Although her closeness hurt a little, since she was leaning up against my right arm… I was still very humbled by her proximity. Her willingness to be so close to me showed just how much she liked me. Merit wasn’t very keen on being touchy-feely with others.

“I came here to beg you not to leave. To not go with Vim. But… maybe that’s your destiny. I ignored mine. It cost me everything,” Merit spoke quietly, as if afraid she’d be heard. Brandy’s voice wasn’t as loud as it was earlier, but there was now other voices lingering in the air. Her story must be over, and now they were all making small talk.

“I’m not sure if he’ll even let me go with him anymore, Merit,” I said evenly.

Merit shook her head, and I noted the way her thick hair rolled along my arm. It felt wet, though wasn’t. “Vim doesn’t do that Renn. Even if you had actually failed, and had done so spectacularly… as long as it wasn’t malicious he’ll never judge you for it. Never stop you. He’s a monster, but not a cruel one,” Merit said.

Monster… She’s called him that before.

“Do you know what he is?” I asked her.

“Vim? No. I have a few ideas, but no I don’t know,” she said.

“What kind of ideas?” I asked.

“I think he’s a Monarch. But he and everyone else… even other Monarchs, say he isn’t one. So I’m not sure how that works,” Merit said.

“Monarch…” I thought of that wolf. The one Vim had given… or fed? That heart to.

She thought he was like that?

Merit nodded. “It makes sense. He can kill Monarchs. He’s immortal. I’ve seen him speared by dozens of arrows, all over his body, and a few days later he was fine. Not even I’d survive that, Renn. Crush my heart and I die. Crush his and he just coughs up some blood and gets angry,” Merit said with a wave in the air, as if swatting away a bug.

“Immortal…” I whispered and wondered if he was. I had been… very hurt, and distressed, when I had seen him after Brom died… but I could still remember it clearly. He had been covered in huge gashes, and blood. He even had a horrible cut on his face, splitting his lower lip to the point I had been able to see bone.

“If he really is who knows… but I’ve seen him endure horrible damage and not even flinch. Only Monarchs can do that,” she said with a nod.

“What are Monarchs, anyway?” I asked her.

“You don’t know?” Merit glanced up at me, and I shook my head.

“Hm…” Merit didn’t say anything as she studied me.

I gulped, and wondered what to say. Why was she looking at me as if I was something weird?

“A Monarch is a ruler. A descendant of one of the first ones. A bloodline that gave birth to an entire species. In the past they were considered gods, or servants of them. Today most are just mindless beasts incapable of thought or reason. In the Society, that I know of, there are only three Monarchs. Tor, in the west in his canyon, Bray a giant wolf, and the little multi-tailed creature in the Cathedral,” Merit said.

“Wait what?” I sat up a little straighter.

“Hm?”

“That cute little thing is a Monarch?” I asked, unable to believe it. It had been adorable… and hadn’t seemed dangerous at all!

“Yeah. It is cute, I guess,” Merit nodded.

“You’re kidding…” I had a hard time believing it… for some reason I had thought Monarchs were all… well…

Like that creature in Lumen.

Though, I had thought Bray had been beautiful, hadn’t I? She had been pretty…

“There’s probably more. But those are the only three I’ve ever met. There’s supposedly a couple in the south, and one in the islands to the west, but I’ve never met them or anyone who knows them so that might just be rumors,” Merit said.

“So… not all Monarchs are dangerous, then,” I said.

“Tor isn’t dangerous because he has no desire for anything beyond his canyon. Bray is unable to leave her prison. And the little one in the Cathedral isn’t powerful enough to worry about I guess. Honestly Renn, it’s best to assume any Monarch you encounter is dangerous. They usually operate entirely on instinct. An instinct of destruction, reproduction and such. Not things you want to be at ease with,” Merit said.

Absorbing this information, I let my mind race as I thought of… well… everything.

Merit thought Vim was a Monarch. Honestly…

“How does… how do you even tell if someone or something is a Monarch?” I asked.

Merit shrugged. “I’ve been told they have a certain smell. I can’t tell though.”

“Thus your belief Vim is a Monarch. His lack of scent,” I said, understanding.

“Well that’s one of the reasons, yes.”

It made sense, at least.

“Does everyone think Vim’s a Monarch?” I asked.

“A lot do, yes. There’s dozens of theories and ideas… there’re bets too. So if you somehow squeeze the truth out of him, don’t tell anyone else until you tell me so I can make sure my bet’s right, okay?” Merit said happily.

“Sure,” I agreed.

Merit chuckled happily, which made me smile. She… shook a little when she laughed. Not badly, but enough it felt odd.

Her chuckling ended and a warm silence filled the air. Sitting next to one another, I found myself growing a little sleepy… maybe I could convince Merit to sleep in the same bed as me tonight. She was cold to the touch, but it felt good.

“Be careful, Renn,” Merit then whispered.

I turned a little, to try and see her face. It was hidden by her thick hair.

“You’re strong… strong enough to be with him. Yet weak enough to get hurt. Gentle enough to suffer. So please… please… be careful,” she whispered.

My eyes blurred as they watered, and I endeavored through the pain and wrapped Merit with my right arm. Holding her close, I gave her a hug.

“And you say I’m gentle, Merit,” I said to her.

She sniffed.

Holding the gentle woman close, I basked in her kindness… and hoped a day would come that I could truly earn the kindness Merit was giving me. The kindness they were all giving me. The kindness they gave without judgment, and without expecting anything in return.

This was what I had wanted all this time, after all.

A home. A family. People who could understand me… people who I didn’t have to bury after just blinking a few times.

So even though it hurt, both physically and in my heart… I’d continue onward. Enduring.

For the Society.

For them.

For Vim.

And of course… for myself.