Humans enjoyed their festivities.

But sometimes too much was too much.

Sitting on a bench, Renn and I were hidden away on the second floor of one of the many ramparts in the Cathedral. Loud crowds hustled and bustled all around the city, but here they were only a distant noise in the distance. The floor we were on had a partly open ceiling. The bench we sat on was under a canopy, that was connected to the third floor.

“Feeling better?” I asked the woman who looked like she was about to throw up.

“Hmhm,” she made a half-hearted response, and I couldn’t help but smile at her. To think she had been so excited last night and this morning. She hadn’t even gotten a wink of sleep thanks to the expectations of what very decisively put her on the bench.

“Wonder why crowds are too much for you. Is it the noise?” I asked her.

“Hughm…” she made another odd sound as she shrugged.

Sitting back, I crossed my leg onto my knee and tried to think what to do for her.

She had only lasted two hours inside the crowds. We had gone to watch the parade, and then lunch. That was it. At this rate she was going to miss the dancing, the plays, and all the stalls that lined the streets in the merchant district.

I was honestly a little surprised by her inability to handle the noise and crowds. Although there were plenty of our kind that couldn’t live in a human city, or handle humans at all… usually those who could were just as fine with crowds as the humans who made them. For her to not only be so… human, and like humans in general, yet be unable to handle them was…

The chronicler had said she was a jaguar… maybe it wasn’t just a personality trait, but something to do with her bloodline.

Of course there was a chance it was because she had spent so long by herself, or because she had only lived in small villages.

Come to think of it she had mentioned Ruvindale had been very crowded to her. And in my perspective, although growing, Ruvindale was just a simple city.

Renn groaned as she leaned forward, hugging her stomach as if in actual pain.

Maybe she was.

Studying her, I smiled at the look of utter defeat on her face. She wasn’t just upset and distressed at the crowds and noises, but herself. She had genuinely wanted to enjoy the festival, yet was now hiding away during the peak of it. Odds were she was mentally screaming at herself in anger.

I had even planned to let her dance a little, yet now that was obviously out of the question. Maybe that was why she had pulled me out into the storm last night; maybe she had known this was going to happen.

Renn rubbed her forehead, and I tried to imagine getting so… weak and unwell, just because of crowds. I understood how it happened of course, ones senses got overloaded, but…

“I’m sorry…” Renn finally was able to voice normal words, and I smiled at her.

“You think I’d complain about getting to get out of being in those crowds? Please,” I said.

A tiny smile squirmed its way on her pained face. “I knew you hated festivals,” she said.

“I never even went to the festival for me, that’s how much I hate them,’ I said.

While Renn’s strained face contorted into thought, I flinched and realized what I had just said.

I coughed, just once, and patted the bench we sat on. “Take your time Renn, if you pass out and I have to carry you back at least do so in a drunken way so no one thinks I’m kidnapping you or something,” I teased her.

She glanced at me, and I noticed the weird look in her eyes. She had noticed what I had said.

Instead of pressing me on it she looked away and sighed, one that told me she was slowly feeling better.

“It’s probably a good thing you fell ill, anyway. My poor feet are still reeling from the shock of last night,” I commented with a light sigh myself.

Renn chuckled, and then groaned. The laugh must have bothered her upset stomach.

“Sorry,” I apologized.

She shook her head. “I’m getting better, I think,” she said softly.

“Hope so,” I said.

The jaguar rubbed her eyes, and I noticed her hat shift wildly on her head. Wonder how uncomfortable having to wear a heavy leather hat on your head was with such ears.

With a deep breath Renn nodded and sat back, and now looked a lot better. Color had returned to her face, and she no longer looked in pain.

“I’ve never been bothered by crowds, but heights used to scare me,” I told her.

“Heights…?”

Hesitating, I tried to quickly think how best to explain it without saying anything unnecessary.

“Like bridges. Tall ones. Or high up, on a mountain or cliff and looking down. When I was younger that bothered me. It wasn’t until a uh… certain moment, that I overcame it. So don’t feel bad Renn, you just need to slowly get yourself used to it. Honestly, even if you don’t I wouldn’t let it bother you. Who wants to like being surrounded by nasty humans anyway?” I said.

Renn smiled and nodded. “I like heights. But… I’d like to get used to crowds. What if you needed me to do something in one? Or give a speech?” she shivered.

Oh…?

She waved her hands in front of her, as if suddenly giving a sermon. “I’d tremble and throw up on stage, and then you’d disown me!”

I smiled at her dramatic example, and knew she was only partly joking. “Yeah, you better not ever embarrass yourself. Immediate exile if you do,” I teased.

She smiled back and nodded. “Exactly!”

A nearby bang echoed through the air, and I wondered what had made it. It sounded like an explosion… but they wouldn’t have done something with anything explosive in the city. They didn’t even know how to make fireworks yet, and unlike some of the pagan festivals they weren’t burning their parade floats or displays. Or at least they shouldn’t be.

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Staring out at the sky, since I couldn’t look up thanks to the canopy, I wondered if it would rain again soon. Most the storm had dissipated or left but the remnants were still there and looked like they would for some time.

“We uh… are leaving tomorrow right?” Renn then asked.

“I plan on it, unless something happens,” I said. Honestly I had been expecting something to happen, thanks to the chronicler telling me to stick around. Yet nothing had. Or well, maybe it had and I hadn’t realized it. Maybe whatever I had meant to do had already happened, and I just hadn’t noticed.

“Will I get to say goodbye to everyone before we do? Should I do it today?” she asked.

“Everyone will be busy today. The church is very active today, and those who aren’t involved in the church have their own on-goings,” I said.

“Oh…” Renn didn’t really like that.

“As mentioned, you can stay here Renn. I have no doubt you’d find it… or well, I bet it’d become a real home for you. One you could proudly claim,” I offered to her again.

She nodded. “I think you’re right. After all I can just avoid the crowds… but…” she shrugged. “Maybe next time,” she said as she glanced at me.

I sighed and nodded. That was my last chance. I’d not mention it again.

Just how long was I going to be stuck with her? Something told me my odds were quickly dwindling.

“You’ll be able to say goodbye to the chronicler at least. We’ll see her in the morning,” I said.

“Oh? Good,” she happily nodded.

She really was better now. She had a large smile and was staring at the sky in the distance. She had her hands on her knees, and was rocking a little… most likely to the far off beat of music from the festival.

Maybe…

Maybe I should put her to use.

She had her own faults, and had a lot to learn… but was more than willing to learn when and what she could. She also seemed to be rather cordial with everyone, predator or prey. Plus she liked the human’s faith, which although would make a good portion of our society upset with her… it also meant I could entrust her to certain details.

But how to use her? There were a few places I could send her, but… like here in Telmik, she wasn’t ready to settle down yet. Which meant she’d not willingly go somewhere alone to fulfill a task.

Yet there other ways to use her. Plus eventually she’d find somewhere she wanted to stay. Someone she wanted to be with. Her current attraction to me would end, or be directed elsewhere. All it took was one fateful meeting. I’d seen it before, many times.

Plus… if I really wasn’t going to be relieved of her, and she was going to stick with me… then there was absolutely no reason not to utilize her where and when I could. Especially since she so obviously wanted the same thing.

Renn noticed my staring, and I realized she could actually be a little useful.

“Hmm…” I thought of the ways she could help. Her ears and tail would make it nearly impossible for her to have any association with nobles or royals, at least in any real manner, but for the rest of the human society she’d do fine. She had the wit to keep herself hidden and safe, and was actually very adapted to humans and their cultures. Plus thanks to her youthful appearance, and generally happy demeanor… she and I could blend easily as family.

Not to mention her penchant for the faiths would let me use her when it came to the churches.

“Hmmm…?” Renn tilted her head and hummed back at me.

Yes. Her strange fondness of the human’s religion was… upsetting, but in reality it made her even more useful. Although many members of our society hated the human church and all it stood for, there was an even bigger portion that either liked it or was adapted to it. Plus, her morals and ethics fit well with someone who would in turn be responsible with lives. I could trust her with another member, because of the way she was.

Slowly a plan formulated. I’d not be able to leave her with anyone, to learn skills or information… thanks to her weird desire to travel and see the world, but that didn’t mean I couldn’t circumvent that. I could simply plan my own route and actions around her training, and then of course also train her on the road.

I’d need to be careful, of course. Too much dedication from me, and I’d get distracted. If I focused too much on her, or spent too much time somewhere just so she could learn something then all that would do is be counter-productive. It’d result in deaths. And I’d not, could not, allow that.

“Vim…?” Renn shifted as an odd smile planted itself on her face. My staring was starting to bother her.

Yes. I’ll spend time thinking about it later, but for now…

“You really want to help the Society Renn?” I asked her.

Her odd smile became a firm one as she nodded. “I do.”

Slowly nodding, I accepted her. “Okay.”

“O…okay?” Renn didn’t seem to like my answer, but that was just because she had expected something more. But there wasn’t more.

One either did or didn’t.

“After here we’ll head to the ponds. Then… a little south. To one of the smiths,” I said.

“Smiths?” she asked.

I nodded and made a fist, pretending to hammer something. “A family of… well, monkeys, I guess, live in a small village near a mine. They’re some of the best smiths in the world currently,” I said. Plus they could teach her a thing or two for me.

“Huh… monkeys?” she asked. She said the word oddly.

“Primates. They’re actually smaller ones. Ones you’d find in the forests far to the south, in islands. The family is a kind one, but very transfixed on their craft,” I said.

“Oh…” she seemed to want to ask more but held it in.

Before we leave I should show her one of the maps. Maybe we should stick around for another day…

Another loud bang drew my attention to the sky, and the large city that sat beneath it.

I saw nothing, nor any signs of smoke or fire.

Maybe the sound was just diluted thanks to where we were, and it sounded different than what it was.

While staring at the cityscape, I wondered what I was willingly getting myself into.

How long has it been since I had decided to handle someone myself? At least a hundred or two years.

Usually I left it to others. The chronicler for example. Lilly and Windle were useful for such things too, when it came to predators.

Yet…

Although I kept offering it to her, I really didn’t want her to stay here and became a saint. It’d taint her, in a bad way… even if she would be useful that way.

And Lilly, for as much as I could trust her… would only ruin her as well. Lilly would only make Renn someone else. Someone without that happy smile, and she'd end up with a heart full of hate.

Honestly giving her to Lilly would probably only make us lose her entirely. If she found the human’s faith that attractive, forcing her down the path of war would only make her hate us. It’d just make another enemy.

I've been down that road before. Never again.

“What are you thinking about Vim?” Renn asked softly.

I frowned and turned to look at the woman who was making me so troubled.

“Our future,” I said simply.

She blinked, and then went red in the face.

Woops, I shouldn’t have phrased it that way…

That was going to be difficult for me too. Was I really up for this? I’d rather go to war than deal with this… how was I so willing to accept this so quickly? I was already making plans…

“Hope it’s a happy future,” Renn whispered.

“For now,” I said.

She shifted as she glared at me with a sidelong glance.

“Feeling up to go back to the festival? You’re looking better,” I said, choosing to end both that conversation and my thoughts.

Renn blinked and then shook her head.

“I uh… I think I’m ready to go back home,” she said.

“To the mansio?” I asked.

She nodded.

“Alright… you sure? I don’t mind waiting here until you’re up for more. There’s a lot you haven’t seen yet,” I offered.

She shook her head. “I saw the parade… and lunch was fun… Thank you, Vim. For putting up with me and letting me enjoy myself,” she said.

“Hm…”

“Oh, but I’d like to make a small stop before we go home,” Renn said.

Home. She kept calling that house home. Yet didn’t want to make it one.

Maybe she simply saw wherever she rested her head at night as home.

Wish I could do that.

“Where?” I asked.

Renn smiled at me. “Snacks, of course!”

Of course.