Chapter Twelve: The Second Trial

Raimie

Having returned to a world of black, I wasn’t surprised to find one of my arms nearly freed from its immobilization. When I’d last been here, I could wiggle my fingers, and that had been a week ago. Why wouldn’t more be free now?

Still, I couldn’t lift the limb into view, not with something clamping my upper arm to the ground. Seeing it would be nice, as it would be my first proof that whatever this place was, I had a body in it. Hopefully, it wasn’t as badly damaged as the one I was wearing in the waking world, the body with an ignorant version of me in it.

I could barely see my ally at the moment. The other man wasn’t kneeling nearby, sawing at incorporeal tethers, as he had been before. Rather, all I could see of the wraith was his hooded head and the arms he’d flung over it.

His cloak’s sleeves had fallen away, revealing pale skin and a sheath strapped around one arm. A string, attached to the sheath, stretched to that hand’s pinky, presumably to allow the quick release of its weapon. The jagged knife, I assumed.

All fascinating but what the wraith was muttering to himself as he rocked in place was more so. Almost, I interrupted him, hesitant to intrude on something that was clearly private, but listening to it might help with solving one of the mysteries in my life.

So, I opened my ears.

“-cannot do this again,” the wraith jabbered. “Not when hope was given- was given-

“He has to come back. HAS to! I could keep working to free him, still have heart of my heart’s permission, but I will never finish in time. Gods! I am falling apart. It will be like the last time I lost him all over again.

“I. I, I, I. Fuck, such an awful word. Where is the we? I miss it. I miss…

“Please. Heart of my heart. Come back.”

I couldn’t eavesdrop on this. Clearing my throat, I watched the wraith whirl toward me, planting his hands on either side of my face. He left his hood’s black pit staring down at me.

“You are here,” he breathed.

Alouin, such intensity. Shouldn’t it scare me?

“Yes,” I drawled. “Forgive me, but do I know you? I thought you were just a figment of my mind, but you have incredible agency for…”

I trailed off when the wraith jerked back as though slapped.

“You heard what I said?”

“Sorry,” I said in response. “Would you mind telling me-?”

Popping to his feet, the wraith paced the length of my body with his fingers clawing into his hood.

“No, no, no!” he hissed. “What if I disrupted the spell?”

Stopping short, he peered down at me.

“Although if I had, something terrible would have happened by now,” he said before plopping to the ground. “My apologies. Being alone for so long can be debilitating.”

“So... I don’t know you?” I asked.

Without responding, the wraith summoned his knife to work on the last ties around my arm. I should probably protest having someone so unstable near me, especially when he had a sharp edge on him, but bound like this, how was I supposed to repulse the wraith? Snarl at him?

Instead, I tried to worm an intelligible explanation from what I’d learned.

“You mentioned a spell,” I said. “What did you mean by that?”

For a while, the wraith worked without a word, and I’d decided to try another angle when he spoke up.

“I cannot tell you. Not outright. It does not work like that. You must struggle through it yourself, or it might cause damage.”

This last detail was accompanied by a bond snapping, and so, it slipped through the sieve of my focus.

I lifted my freed limb, spreading my fingers in front of my face. It was real, or looked real at least. What about the rest of me?

As I ran a hand down my chest, the wraith stepped over me to kneel on the other side.

“The arms are easiest,” he said, as if to himself. “We should avoid the dangerous bits for as long as possible.”

Dangerous bits?

No. I could worry about that bit of ominousness later.

For now, all I cared about was regaining my freedom of movement. The ability to flail my arm around pleased me more than I cared to say, and I wanted this for all of me. So, I extended a hand toward the wraith.

“I don’t suppose you have another knife,” I said. “I’d love to help.”

Chuckling, the wraith said, “That is, again, not how it works. Even if I gave you a knife, you could not touch it.”

“Really?”

I bobbed my waiting palm, and with a sigh, the wraith placed his blade there. When he released its hilt, however, the weapon merely passed through my hand, and as it plunged for my body, I panicked before the wraith snatched the knife from mid-air.

“You see?” he said. “In order to cut through these ties, you require me and my knife, but conversely, I cannot help you without your permission. Freeing you is a team effort.”

Without my permission. Hadn’t the wraith asked for my permission as his price for freeing me?

“You wanted me out of these restraints all along, didn’t you?” I said. “And if you say you can’t answer because that’s not how it works, so help me. I’ll start screaming again.”

Carefully, the wraith set his knife beside my head before hovering his hand over my cheek. It came so close that I could feel its warmth, and the depth of my desire for that distance to be closed surprised me.

“Raimie—” the wraith started.

And at this stranger first speaking my name, something reverberated through me from the inside out.

“—seeing you escape this place is my greatest wish.”

As if waiting for this confession, a hook sank between my shoulder blades, and I resisted its pull, unwilling to leave this place when I was making so much progress. If only I could remember what I’d learned.

Remember…

I was getting sick of waking up, only to stare at the same bumps in the rock overhead. Oh, and with new injuries on me too. It would be nice if I could rise from dreams without my body screaming at me for once.

Walking my fingers along my chest to where I’d been stabbed, I stopped when they encountered bandaging. So, Rhylix had already dressed the wound. When I could, I should properly thank that man.

“He’s awake now, for sure this time,” someone unseen said. “When should we come closer?”

“After I’ve donned my most terrifying visage, of course! Wait. Are you asking for my opinion?”

“What? No, you repugnant stain! I was merely speaking out loud.”

I knew those voices. They set a chill in my heart, and my thoughts started racing because these voices? They were copies of mine.

Slow as sap from a tree, I sat up on my cot, backing along it until I was plastered to stone. Frantically, I searched for a weapon, but before I could find one, I stopped short.

Two men, lounging against the clinic’s doorframe, had stolen my focus. My twins—the figures swathed in white and black—caught me staring, and at their cautious smiles, my smile, I pushed myself further into rock.

At that, the one in black surged forward with its face drawn into a horrifying mask, and I froze. Sighing, the one in white pushed itself out of the entryway.

“Stop that,” it said.

Bristling, the twin in black spun on its antithesis, raising one hand as if to throw something.

“You want to start something now, ya bore?” it snarled.

Rolling its eyes, the twin in white said, “No, simpleton. I’m simply suggesting that we explain ourselves to our human before he dies of fright.”

“Oh.”

Lowering its hand, the twin in black glanced over its shoulder, grimacing.

“I hate to agree with you, but you’re right,” it said. “Excuse me while I go puke in a corner.”

“Of course I’m right. When am I not?”

Striding toward my cot, the twin in white ‘bumped’ into its counterpart, making it stumble, and recovering, the twin in black followed, hissing the whole way.

When they reached the cot, they folded onto its foot. The one in white sat with folded hands and a crossed leg while the one in black sprawled with its foot kicking.

Meanwhile, I couldn’t breathe. I must have gone crazy, cracking under recent strain, because if I hadn’t, what were these things staring at me with my eyes? Would these unknowns be like Teron, leaving me for dead before someone saved me?

Pursing its lips, the twin in white said, “Relax. We’re not here to hurt you-”

“Yet,” the twin in black interrupted.

An already rigid copy of me further tensed with a vein in its neck throbbing, and it fixed its gaze further up the wall.

“Would you keep. your. mouth. shut?” it hissed. “I’m best suited for this first introduction. We learned that last time. You’ll get your turn once he’s calmed down.”

Flapping a hand like a mouth beside its face, the twin in black spoke several silent words, making the twin in white shake its head.

“You aren’t seeing things. Well, you are, but we’re perfectly real, not figments of your mind,” it said. “In case you were wondering.”

Not crazy. According to twins of me, both of whom the Esela in the arena hadn’t seen.

Yeah, sure. I hadn’t lost it.

My lungs, having remembered their need for air, had begun working again, but they were in overdrive with hyperventilation about to ensue.

So, I peeled myself away from all thoughts about my sanity. I retreated from the terror pounding through my body, and as I’d learned when I was a boy, I detached, focusing not on the problem but on how to solve it.

Fortunately, unlike the moments following Eledis’ revelation of my heritage, I had tangible means of unravelling this conundrum.

Tangible. Ha!

“If you’re not figments, then what in the void are you?” I snapped before glancing toward the other side of the clinic.

I’d spoken more loudly than I’d intended, and the last thing I wanted was to wake up the boy lying several cots over. After what had happened during our first trial, Dath would probably want to kill me, even if I didn’t provoke him further, but if he saw me talking to thin air…

“A good question, if a little crassly put.”

I snapped my attention back to my twins, where the one in white was gently smiling at me.

“In answer,” it said, “we are zzz.”

At that buzzing noise, it stopped, rocking in place, and laughing, the twin in black collapsed on the cot. It rolled across the blanket, incessantly teasing its counterpart, until it started buzzing as well. Shooting upright, it spat something in a high-pitched screech before swiping at its exposed tongue, and I relaxed, sinking into my pillow.

“Oh, you’re Bright and Dim,” I said, pointing to each of them.

“Who’re you calling dim, useless whelp?” the twin in black growled before gasping.

With an evil grin, it ran through a list of profanities, some of which I’d never heard before, presumably in a test of its voice.

“So, the nicknames did stick,” Bright said. “I wasn’t sure, even when you woke up after…”

It fell silent, so I finished that sentence for it.

“Teron and Fissid?”

Dim snapped its mouth shut, shifting its attention away from me.

“I’m sorry for that, by the way,” it said.

Frowning, I asked, “How are you, in any way, at fault for what happened?”

Bright was also looking at Dim, although it appeared more befuddled than me, and flicking its eyes to us, Dim bent double, snickering and slapping its knees.

“You think… I meant… the fire and killings?” it gasped. “No. I’m sorry that I couldn’t help you more.”

That made much more sense.

“You and Bright did plenty,” I said. “I’d have died in that fire without your guidance.”

Wincing, Bright said, “Still. Your poor hands…”

My hands were fine. Over the last week, Rhylix had been overly attentive with them. The skin across my palms was still stiff, but that should ease with time, or so I’d been told.

If you find this story on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the infringement.

Regardless, the reason I’d escaped Fissid with such minimal injuries was because of these two.

These two who’d been distinctly unable to talk when we’d arrived in Allanovian. What had changed?

Lifting my head off of the wall, I narrowed my eyes at my anomalies, watching Dim give Bright an incredulously dubious look.

“What do you mean ‘your poor hands’?” it asked, almost sarcastically.

Before Bright could respond, I said, “What are you two?”

I’d been exceedingly quiet, almost hadn’t heard my own question, but Bright and Dim whipped their heads to me anyway.

“I think we can assume that the block on our communication hasn’t lifted yet,” Bright said, “and identity seems a forbidden subject. For now.”

“What stuffy here’s trying to say is we can’t answer that,” Dim said. “Not now. Maybe not ever, although that would be inconvenient.”

So, basically every important question I had would continue to go unanswered, although I’d made some progress with this mystery.

…Why did this situation seem like an echo of another one?

Shaking myself, I said, “So, you’ll be sticking around for a while, then?”

“What else would you expect us to do?” Dim growled. “We can’t exactly go anywhere else.”

Interesting. Did that mean they were attached to me?

Did that matter at the moment? Better to propose a few changes to our situation, changes that would keep me from getting killed. Hopefully.

With caution, I said, “If we can’t discuss what you are—”

And if I can believe you’re real.

“—maybe I can ask inconsequential questions.”

They exchanged a glance that ended with Dim shrugging.

“There’s no harm in trying,” it said. “What’d you have in mind?”

First, something for my safety.

“Can you control when you appear to me?” I asked.

After another glance, Dim drawled, “Yes?”

“In that case…”

How did I put this in a way that wouldn’t offend two… beings?

Yes. Beings I didn’t fully understand. Beings that might or might not have unimaginable power behind them.

“I see you,” I said, “but others do not.”

“Mostly true,” Bright said.

Mostly…? Not the time for tangential questions like that.

“Can we agree that, for the moment, we don’t want people thinking my mind’s snapped?” I asked. “I don’t know what to think of my family’s plans, but what might or might not happen in the future doesn’t matter. With the way my life is, I don’t get the luxury of looking forward. I can only consider the present, and my circumstances demand that I build an army. No one will follow someone with a broken mind or a…”

Hmm. Now, that was a terrifying thought. The stories about primeancers occasionally mentioned that they would talk with the sources of their power, but one of those legendary—and usually reviled—thaumaturges hadn’t walked the world in centuries. They weren’t coming back now.

“No one will follow an unstable man or a primeancer into battle,” I continued, chuckling to myself. “So, I have to look stable, yes?”

Turning to Bright, Dim cupped its chin in its hand, obviously passing off responsibility for answering this question, and its counterpart glared back.

“Your argument makes logical sense. At this point in time, others’ perception of you greatly matters,” it carefully said before facing me. “What does that have to do with us?”

“Well,” I drawled, “if you two, or more importantly, that one—”

I pointed at Dim, who was swaying back and forth while humming under its breath.

“—hang around me, my eyes are likely to drift your way, and soon enough, someone will notice if I’m staring into nothing. My family might dismiss something like that. I played with imaginary friends often enough as a child but other people? I don’t think so. So, could you only appear to me when I’m alone? Or in danger, I suppose. Is that too much to ask?”

I cringed, expecting one of them to explode on me for my soft criticism, but neither did. Bright merely looked thoughtful while Dim continued with its antics.

“As always, your suggestion is reasonable. We can do as you’ve asked,” Bright said, “although we should discuss it again later.”

“For the love of me, can you, for once in your existence, not hedge your bets?” Dim snarled before softening. “We’ll give you space, kid. Got anything else for us?”

Second, something for my peace of mind.

Shifting in bed, I asked, “Must you look like that? Like me, I mean. It makes talking with you…”

What was the right word for it?

I never got to decide. Between blinks, two copies of my visage were replaced with Eledis, and yelping, I slapped a hand over my eyes.

“Not him!” I hissed. “Anyone but him!”

“What would you prefer, then?” one of the two asked.

“I don’t know. Nothing that you’ve used so far,” I said. “These appearances are disguises, I’m guessing? Something to keep me calm. Obviously, what you’re trying isn’t working. So, why don’t you show me what you really look like?”

In the silence that followed, I almost lowered my hand, but I didn’t want to see two copies of my grandfather again. A single instance of that had been enough, thank you.

“Are you sure about this?”

No, of course I wasn’t, but Bright and Dim’s natural appearances couldn’t be worse than the versions of them I’d already seen, right?

“Yes,” I said.

“Then, look.”

“See.”

With my heart in my throat, I peeked through my fingers, and when I saw what lay on the other side, I lost control of my body, letting my hands thump on the cot.

To my left, where Bright had been perched, a swirl of white light and rigid peace spilled into the room while to the right, where Dim had lounged, a miasma of darkness pooled and crept forth, screaming of pain and fear and insanity.

Between them, a war was playing out in miniature. Light resisted darkness until those shadows grew protrusions, sending the enemy into retreat. So, it went with both sides pushing and shoving against their foe, but nothing resolved.

I watched this, and the longer I did, the more the battlefield enlarged until it surrounded me, and I was strung between the two combatants. They rushed into me, a new vessel waiting to be filled with one or the other, but neither could claim dominance. They ripped at each other inside of me, and as they did so, pieces of me, the core of me, were sucked into this conflict, and I didn’t know what to do, didn’t know what-

Somewhere far distant, a voice I recognized was keening at deafening volumes with such wretched grief there, but any desire I might have had to help this unfortunate soul was consumed by my own personal hell.

And abruptly, I was lying against a stone wall with my muscles twitching, and my twins were staring at me with glittering eyes.

“Fascinating,” Bright said. “Every time-”

Something soft and fluffy hit my face, and when it fell into my lap, Dim and Bright had vanished.

“Shut… up. Trying to sleep.”

Sluggishly, I glanced toward the voice’s source in time to watch Dath collapsing into his cot again. I’d woken him up. Damn.

In increments, I tested my ability to move, eventually sliding to my feet. Grabbing the pillow, I tottered toward Dath, unsteadily tucking it under his head when I reached him.

Alouin, why did I feel so drained?

Shakily, I started back to my own cot, only making it so far before my legs gave out. Fortunately, my body had gotten used to hitting stone over the last few weeks, so I didn’t flinch when I hit the ground.

Instead, I leaned against a cot. Relaxing there, I waited for energy to replenish in me, and soon enough, I felt ready to stand again.

Someone ruined this before I could try.

“Hell, you’ll be one of those types, won’t you?”

A sigh filled the air, quickly followed by.

“Again, I ask. Why are you out of bed?”

Smiling to myself, I lifted a finger toward the other cot.

“Dath threw his pillow at me,” I said. “I had to return it.”

“Of course you did.”

Hanging my wrists from my knees, I waited for the question that I knew was coming.

“Can you stand?”

And there it was.

“Maybe with some help,” I said.

Something clinked on stone, and after a moment, someone clasped my forearms, pulling me up.

“Thanks,” I told Rhylix.

Damn, he looked sour. He was normally so cheery, silly almost. What could have changed that?

“I have a gift for you,” he said.

I raised an eyebrow.

“Really?” I asked. “What type of gift?”

After ensuring that I could stand on my own, Rhylix strode for his clinic’s entrance, retrieving what he’d left there. When he returned, he lifted it to rest on his palms, and my eyes popped. He was offering me a scabbarded sword, nearly identical in appearance to Shadowsteal.

Hesitantly reaching for it, I asked, “May I?”

On receiving a nod, I slid the blade free a few inches before biting my lip.

“This is well made,” I said.

“I should hope so,” Rhylix said. “I paid quite a lot for its forging.”

I shot my eyes up to him, dropping my hold on the sword.

“You did?” I asked.

With a faint smile, Rhylix said, “Yes. It’s my gift to you, remember?”

And something hissed inside of me. I took a step back.

“Why?” I asked.

Rhylix furrowed his brow.

“Because I could,” he said. “Because you’ll want a weapon after you pass your second trial and also for reasons that I will tell you after you’ve passed it. But for now, you’ll have to believe that I’m giving this to you with no strings attached.”

He slammed the sword into its scabbard.

“Speaking of your second trial, Allanovian’s Council has finished preparing for it,” he said. “I’m supposed to bring you to them.”

“Already?” I squeaked before lowering my volume. “What am I thinking? Of course they wouldn’t give me time to recover.”

Softly laughing, Rhylix said, “You’re learning.”

Without another word, he led the way out of his clinic. I’d been mentally mapping every route that I’d taken in Allanovian so far, and while it was by no means complete, I understood most of the city’s layout by now. So, when we turned onto a hallway and doors made of stone came into view, I wasn’t surprised.

Rhylix stopped before we could enter the arena beyond, and when he turned around, his face was fixed in an atypical state of severity.

“I’m sorry for what you’ll experience within,” he said. “Please, know that it wasn’t my choice.”

At this, the hair all over my body stood on end.

“I understand what it’s like to be forced into an unwanted situation better than most,” I said. “Why are you so tense about it?”

Shaking his head, Rhylix said, “I can’t tell you.”

Without looking behind him, he rested his gifted sword against one of the doors.

“Silverblade will be waiting for you once you’ve finished,” he said, “and after you walk back through those doors, you’ll be a Zrelnach, able to carry weapons in Allanovian to your heart’s content. So don’t worry about that stricture. Now. You’ll need to drink this.”

Withdrawing a flask from his cloak, he offered it to me, and I took it with trepidation. What was it about this trial that had the Eselan on edge?

Still, I uncorked the flask and drained it. While its contents tasted like water, they were oily in nature, which had me coughing. Rhylix took the emptied flask, guiding me toward the gap between stone.

“Good luck,” he said. “I’ll be watching, as will the rest of Allanovian, unfortunately.”

Why did he sound so irritated about that?

No matter. I had bigger problems to handle right now.

After the long hike here, I felt more recovered from Bright and Dim’s unveiling of their natures, but something in the core of me felt…. drained. I didn’t know how else to put it. Hopefully, this second trial wouldn’t require much combat because otherwise I was fucked. Again.

The scene inside the arena was much the same as before: the whole of Allanovian gathered with four Eselan sitting behind a table at the ramps’ apex. The only difference I noticed were several bowls, burning red, sitting around the arena while a haze from them rose into the air.

I tried to embody confidence as I strode to the arena’s center point, but it probably didn’t carry to the people watching. Sites of darkened sand, places where my blood had been spilled, kept drawing my gaze, no matter how much I tried to focus on the Council.

Once I’d stopped, the woman in their rank rose.

“Here, we have a human who’s proven it has the martial aptitude to join the Zrelnach’s ranks,” Ferin said. “Now, we shall test its mental fortitude. Challenger, approach me.”

I narrowed my eyes at her.

“You… want me to cross the room,” I said. “Is that all?”

Ferin inclined her head, and gritting my teeth, I stepped forward, expecting all manner of trap to spring. As I advanced, the red haze from the bowls thickened, coalescing in front of me, and when I’d reached the halfway point, it sprang into physical being.

A wall of flames spread across the arena to impede my progress. Springing forth almost in front of my nose, it had me tripping backward until I fell into the sand. Panting, I glanced along it, noting no safe way through.

“Seriously?” I gasped. “Fire? Again?”

The Council didn’t respond. Their faces had gone rigid while their eyes were fixed on something that I couldn’t see. Glancing over the other Esela, I noted the same reaction from them with a frown. What was happening?

Clambering to my feet, I approached the wall of flame, but no heat was emanating from it. Was it an illusion? The Esela were capable of magic like that, but I couldn’t be sure if that was what I was seeing here.

Still. What choice did I have? I needed the Zrelnach to follow me, and gaining their loyalty meant passing through a possible illusion. If it wasn’t what I thought, could I handle the burns that I’d surely gain? I knew from experience how debilitating those could be now.

Swallowing, I retreated a few steps. I took a deep breath and dashed into the blaze.

Flames flicked around me, tickling as they passed. When agony failed to assault me, I almost burst into tears. I hadn’t been sure that I was right, and if I’d had to relive Fissid…

I shuddered.

The roar that was flooding my ears reduced to a hum, and I heard someone singing. For some unnatural reason, her voice raised an echo of bliss in me.

The fire surrounding me parted, and I found myself standing over a child, lying on a brook’s bank. Her eyes were closed, and a song was on her lips.

On the other side of the creek, a village peeked through the trees. The girl’s home, perhaps?

That didn’t matter, though. Not yet. The peace that I’d found here soaked into me, and for the first time in a long while, I relaxed.

I didn’t know if this was part of my trial, but for the moment, I didn’t care. I’d enjoy this tranquility while I could, but the idea of leaving the girl unaware of my presence made my skin crawl.

So, I leaned over to nudge her, and when I did, the world fuzzed over, sending me—

—to Allanovian where four Eselan were staring down at me. Shaking my head, I took another step toward them and—

—a drum’s steady beat shattered the forest’s stillness. The girl’s eyes snapped open, staring through me, and a heartbeat later, I barely dodged her leap to her feet. She faced the village with her features set into an expression that I’d never seen before, but when I followed her gaze, I understood.

The village was burning. Like Fissid had. Figures were running from their homes, only to be cut down in the street. Much like Fissid’s residents. The girl’s mouth parted, and the scream that she surely meant to release howled through me as well.

Someone I recognized burst out of the brush further down the stream’s bank. On reflex, I stepped between the girl and a boy, scarred by violence, but I relaxed once recognition fully clicked.

Rhylix dashed through me, leaving me flinching for an impact that was never to come, and when he reached the girl, he took hold of her hand.

“What are you doing, Ren?” he shouted. “Run!”

With a sob, the girl abandoned her home, and Rhylix shoved her toward safety before spinning to watch the town collapse. A dazed look took hold of him, but soon enough, it shifted, and he took a step forward, throwing his arms back. He released a roar so savage that I was locked in place until it stopped tearing through the air. When the noise petered off, Rhylix lowered his head, wiping tears on a sleeve, and sniffing, he whirled to run after the girl.

When he was far distant, though, he paused, glancing over his shoulder, and the world blurred again, making me see double. The plain beyond the boy and the arena overlapped one another, and a child merged with an astonishingly tall healer.

“Raimie!” he yelled. “Watch your back!”

Spinning, I caught sight of people leaping out of the trees. Their eyes were empty, devoid of life, and black vines crisscrossed under every inch of their skin. They flowed around me, chasing after their prey, and almost, I tried to stop them so I could help the children.

I couldn’t, however, distract so many on my own. I wasn’t sure that was humanly possible. So instead, I stood stock still, stuck between wanting to do everything possible to save the kids and needing to save my own life. I should run in the opposite direction, trying to keep these hostiles’ attention off of me, but the kids! Hell, the hand on my throat was heavy.

It seemed my decision would never have mattered in the first place. Just like the children had before, the monsters chasing them passed right through me, not once looking my way. Right as I started realizing these monsters might not be able to see me, one of them stopped short and—

—a pair of Zrelnach escorted a man through the arena’s stone doors. He shuffled forward, and—

—the monster faced me, sniffing the air. The mad light of wanted violence filled its eyes, and flinging its head back, it raised an ululation to the sky. It sprinted at me and—

—the man saw his chance to rush me and—

—I tried to sidestep it, but its shoulder clipped me. We collapsed in a pile of limbs with each of us struggling to gain the upper hand. The monster won, perching on my chest as it pressed down on my throat, and I slapped at the ground for a means of defense.

I found nothing.

Panicking, I grabbed at grimy fingers, slowly prying them apart. Gasping, I pulled one of my hands away from the enemy before smashing my palm into its chest. White light flared all around us, and the monster flew away from me, but it wouldn’t get away so easily.

It had attacked me. It had killed ALL OF THOSE PEOPLE, the same as Teron had with Fissid. It had meant to chase after and probably murder a pair of CHILDREN, for Alouin’s sake! I followed it with heat spilling over inside, and when I reached it, I rained shadow-covered fists on its flesh until its face was pulped.

Panting, I struggled to rein in this uncontrollable BURN, licking along every inch of my body, but by the time I’d manage that, it was too late. The monster’s body was limp, and I knew it was dead.

The village’s fire spread, quickly reaching the stream. It surrounded me, and the familiar agony of burning flesh filled my mind.

When the arena gained dominance once more, I was kneeling in its sand. The world was so… crisp, like what I’d known before stepping into the fire except- except-

Something sticky was coating my face, but when I wiped it clean, it was only transferred to my fingers. Absently, I rubbed them together while processing everything around me.

The Esela, including this village’s Council, were staring at me. Yes, that was right.

Rhylix was watching me with pity. Yes.

My family’s eyes were transfixed on me with horror. No.

That was wrong.

Why were they looking at me like that?

The gumminess between my fingers attracted my attention, and when I wiped it away on my clothes, my gaze followed my hand down.

Where a man was lying beneath me.

What…? Why was he there? Why were his eyes-?

His eyes were empty.

For one dumbstruck moment, I glanced between that blank stare and my red-stained fingers before choking on a scream. Panic took control, guiding my movement, and when I pushed the emotion down, I was leaning against a ramp’s walls with my stomach contents splattering on the ground.

I kept repeating the same question in my head.

What? What?

My mind’s eye kept skipping to the same image.

Dead eyes peering above a caved-in face.

And I raised my fist, coated in red with rust more deeply engrained in its knuckles.

I- I- I-

Roaring, I sprinted for the dais with its table and the Councilwoman who’d started this. When I reached the arena’s edge, I leapt for my target, surprised by the height I gained, but before I could get anywhere close to Ferin, the Zrelnach on either side of the table moved, slamming into me as they fell. When they pinned me to the ground, I snarled at them, fighting their hold with all my strength, and a boy yet to understand what had happened screamed at the top of his lungs.

“Let me go! Gods, please. Let me go!”

Something thumped beside me while a face framed by blonde hair drew close.

“I’m so sorry,” Ferin said. “Welcome to the Zrelnach ranks.”

She disappeared before barking for my captors to release me, and I was left sobbing on the ground.

Distantly, I heard someone dismiss the crowd. Distantly, I listened to the tromp of feet as the arena was emptied. Distantly, I saw family and friends hover over me. Distantly, I watched someone tell the only people I loved to give me space.

And from a distance, I climbed to my feet. I stood over the man I’d killed, both seeing and ignoring the mess I’d made, before trudging to the arena’s stone doors, aware somewhere in the back of my mind that Rhylix was trailing me.

Once outside, I retrieved a sword that had been set aside. Rhylix had been right. I very much wanted this weapon in my hand now that my second trial was over.